All my life I've been a technology bottom feeder. I've spent my slimy jawless existence many fathoms below the bleeding edge picking through the carcasses of other people's bad decisions. Usually what you find down here is long-dead, rotten in many ways. Lately though, something has changed. From cliffs high above the oceans are rife with fresh meat! Lemmings falling to their death!

Hipsters everywhere are selling off their old iPads in anticipation of the new ones! By buying a trendy toy, they never learned a thing about personal finance but let me tell you right now: they're about to get a lesson in economics! When supply outstrips demand, the price plummets into the depths! Right into my gaping maw!

Thank you! Thank you hipsters everywhere! With all luck, I'll have one just for my cat!