The Internet is the wrong place to look for women. It is a sausage fest. Men outnumber women online by some ridiculous number. It is like getting into ham radio to pick up chicks.

And yes, I have tried, and no, on those rare occasions--once, maybe twice in each year of looking very hard--that I have found someone I felt really attracted to and wanted to meet, it does not work. Most often she wants absolutely nothing to do with me. Or, worse, she is married, or she has a boyfriend, or she is a man, or she agrees to meet and I travel two days to get there and my cell phone never rings, then I return home only to discover that she has been calling me an asshole and weirdo in her Livejournal for the past six months, all the while pretending to care when she talked to me.

You are not going to get laid here. You're NOT. Everybody on the Internet who's looking for love is a desperate lonely horny male geek, exactly like you and me. You are more likely to get struck by lightning or win the lottery than to hook up. Give up on it now before a lifetime of rejection and humiliation makes you as bitter as it's made me.