OP here. Well, your personal insults to me aside, one of the answers I'm looking for is how exactly to kill it with fire.
I've been trying. I know all of the things you have just said. I'm not that much of an idiot. It bothers me that this is even in my mind. I can't purge it. That's why I even came on this bloody board. I can't seem to kill it. This is the problem.
I don't want to hurt anyone else, God knows. Which is one reason I'm willing to just leave both girls, so I don't potentially lose control and say something more hurtful than just "goodbye."