>>1
i have one question for you
with her doing the things she does, does that change who she is?

i used to have a similar situation. i was dating a girl who smoked weed and drank. i only had one request. if shes doing it, just dont bring it around me and dont call me when youre drunk or high. and one time she called me drunk and as she was leaving a message on my phone she said "oh shit. im so sorry please forget that i left this message." and when i called she apologized because she understood i just wasnt into that and i didnt want that anywhere around me. but i didnt try to control her when she was with her friends. things worked out well when we were together. i sometimes listened to the things she did when she was drunk or high and i'd laugh at her stories with her. i never understood why she did it but i just accepted that thats what she like to do like me and working out.

we broke up cause of distance when i moved and we're still good friends and i still listen to her stories

but like bingo said. if you really like her you can work it out. theres always solutions. see how she would feel about