OP here, I obviously am still alive and have not done it haha. >>5 yes, these thoughts primarily come up when i'm alone and extremely bored. I have been keeping it in the back of my mind. Ive been trying to find religion and "find god" for a long time but I just have too many doubts about it.

>>7 hmmmm, i'm not sure why I contemplate it. It's just something interesting to think about when i'm bored I guess. But, i'm thinking now that I could be something smaller within me that is driving me to think about it in that way. For example, i'm single, so maybe it's that lonely feeling?

... this could become a really interesting project for psychology lol