>> Has a pocket protector made of gold
>>2 Has diamonds arranged in his gold pocket protector which are shaped to resemble a famous mathematical equation.
>>10 has a vast collection of math jokes, which he inflicts on all about him without warning or provocation.
>>16 brings his Yugioh cards to the terminal because he has no friends to play with.
>>17 has a torrent of every Yu-Gi-Oh episode on his external hard drive.
>>18 Wears the kind of glasses found in 1950s movies that were about engineers.
>>19 polishes his slide-rule daily, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.
>>22 is a plushophile who likes to re-enact that old cartoon of Tux getting buggered by the BSD daemon.
>>26 Reviews shitty videogames and shows the reviews on youtube.
>>30
Makes angry videos on Youtube highlighting moments in the Star Wars sequels where Yoda's speech pattern deviates from his usual sentence structure.
>>33 manually edited every Lucky Star episode so that the audio plays Madonna's Lucky Star over and over.
>>35 Is a member of the most convincing Kraftwerk cover band ever.
>>37 Writes his grocery list and daily schedule using Star Wars text
>>40 Is the fist to take a pop hit and then make a cover of it using sounds from 8-bit consoles and computers.
>>43 gets insulted when called a geek, and points out in minute detail the differences between a geek and a nerd.
>>44 Created his own episode of the AVGN, and it was so convincing, even the AVGN thought he created it by himself. It began with a cover of the AVGN song that could have easily been mistaken for Kyle Justin.
>>49 makes jokes about premature ejaculation to hide his other problems.
>>66 Keeps the top 42 list of the 42 most interesting things that equal 42.
>>67 Created a nerd themed parody of the Dos Equis commercial. It includes such things as
"He can play an NES game without blowing on it"
>>68 Has the world's second largest collection of body pillows and has tagged each of them with rfid chips for easy body pillow management.
>>73 thinks it's cool to say >>someone else thinks it's cool to live in a [$RANDOM_THING]
>>78 is playing his own trumpet right now. If you know what I mean. And I think you do.
>>79 Forks his free software just enough to put his name on it.
>>84 Doesn't call cars by their name, instead calls them by their manufactured issued code. He takes a great deal of pride in his BNR34
>>85 Wrote his own 'car' function as part of building his own LISP interpreter from scratch in LISP itself.
>>86 snickered at 'boner' + '34' but was self-conscious that it might be too obvious a joke
>>88 uses phonetic language in the description of Japanese mythological creatures who have appeared in video games.
>>89 evidently hasn't quite finished memorizing his extensive collection of old video game manuals
>>90 bought hundreds of copies of every book in the Sue Grafton mystery novel series so that he can write sentences on his bookshelf using the letters on the spine.
>>93 writes Dragonball Z/Diary of Anne Frank crossover fanfic.
>>94 Calculated which anime teams can beat the DBZ team, and which ones can't. He has many fangirls and fanboys that want him killed for saying that the DBZ team can beat their team, and they diagree.
>>95 wrote a program that writes 'Clonepa sequels automatically.
>>96 made a whole set of Everybody Loves Clonepa skins for The Sims III
>>98 has produced an exacting 3D model of 2GET High for Simcity 5.
>>99 programmed his favorite comic book store into Call of Duty.
>>101 has made a densha otoko thread in the /Love & Romance/ board.
>>104 had an awesome 100get post all ready to go but his mom made him take out the garbage and he missed his chance.
>>106 went to a club last night, but found the experience alienating and returned early to project on to another poster.
>>107 uses a ZX Spectrum with 48K of memory to surf the interwebs
>>110 Has a $3000 Aliemware computer that he uses to play Solitare and Minesweeper.
>>116 Know by heart what day 1993-09-6188 corresponds to in the alternate timeline where its 2010-08-09
>>118 is one of only five people in the world to have an official military ribbon for participating in an Internet flame war.
>>128 is the only other member. He also regrets missing the power-of-2GET
>>129 Has a house with an interior which resembles the inside of the Starship Enterprise
>>134 actually IS Moot, and still wishes to be the little girl.
>>135 legally changed his name to 'The Little Girl' in order to make his dream a reality.
>>138 is amused by silly names because he never leaves his house
>>139 Likes to quote the whole "Biggus Dickus" scene from that Monty Python movie.
>>140 enjoys reciting Monty Python lines with other nerds, lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large...
>>144 is the person who discovered that MC Frontalot's second album lines up perfectly with Busty Sluts Vol. 6.
>>146 can tell the difference between Yui and Ui even when their hairstyle is the same.
>>147 Fan-translates anime that hasn't been popular in over 30 years.
>>151 Created a computer virus that causes vocaloids to sound like 60 year old chain smokers.
>>152 bio-engineered an actual virus that causes 60-year old chain smokers to sound like Vocaloids.
>>153 stitched together body parts of 60-year-old chain smokers to create an actual Vocaloid.
>>154 spends his time furiously writing to people on the Inter-net to inform them that Vocaloid is a software program, not a cartoon anthropomorphization.
>>155 Created a fake motivational poster that was so true and hard-hitting, that it caused a mass suicide 10 seconds after it was posted to an image board.
>>158 suffers from the Kugimiya Virus Hypersensitive Cerebral Corticalitis.
>>165 Animated his own parody. It is called "Asses Power Hentalia"
>>168 is so nerdy that he doesn't grasp the difference between being nerdy and using eggcorns and other malapropisms in speech.
>>170 Laughs at instances when people use large or obscure words the way Beavis and Butthead laugh at words such as "wood" or "erect."
>>173 is an American who wrote a novel of the Revolution in the King's English.
>>174 has never been outside his native Devon, but still steadfastly refuses to use Oxford spellings. And the less said about his Noah Webster body pillow, the better ...
>>176 insulted strangers on the internet by recording a League of Legends-inspired rap album.
>>178 translates Irish folk songs of the 1960s into Cantonese.
>>182 has watched "Videodrome" one hundred and eighty-two times.
>>183 only watched "Videodrome" one hundred and twenty-eight times, as he only does thing in powers of two. If he were to watch it just one more time, he would feel compelled to watch it again one hundred and twenty-seven more times to get the figure up to an even two hundred and fifty-six.
>>186 knows everything there is to know about his dorsal fins.
>>187 was fed up with the way cosplay porn is done (too boring), so he directed one himself.
>>188 forced a thousand spoons into his anus and wrote an opera about it.
>>192 borrows those costumes to put onto his sex robots, ironically enough.
>>194 Makes people wear safety goggles when entering his house.
Otherwise he might blind them with science.
>>195 tries to trick people to place their eyes in front of his particle accelerator so that he can actually say that he blinded them with science.
>>197 built a house entirely out of windows, shaped like the Windows logo, on top of which he flies the Windows logo as a flag.
>>198 built a house entirely out of penguins, shaped like a penguin, on top of which he flies a decapitated penguin wearing a tuxedo as a flag.
>>199 Built a house entirely out of pandas , shaped like a panda, and uses a piece of bamboo as a flagpole flying a flag which is a picture of 2 pandas having sex.
>>201 Is so obsessed with GETs that he has as many open browser windows as his computer will allow, with each browser window having as many open tabs as the browser will allow.
>>203 posts as Beady Eyes, but only when he's missing a get by one or two posts.
...maybe.
>>205 takes pills to deal with his ADHD, social anxiety and a bunch of other imaginary disorders.
One day >>211 have been to StinkGeek in the internet,StinkGeek.
So many people were there that >>211 couldn't get on the site .
Then, >>211 looked at the banner ad,it was written " COOL FREE RINGTONES "
Are you fool?
Or are you poor?
Hey boy ! Don't come to StinkGeek you don't usually come in because of COOL FREE RINGTONES.
How silly you are! It's just COOL FREE RINGTONES and it is COOL FREE RINGTONES!
There are some families. 4 persons, all of the family, come to StinkGeek?
Hahaha,,it's so funny.
The father said "Well, I shall favourite page". This situation looked ugly and poverty.
Oh boy ! They must leave the site because >>211 give them COOL FREE RINGTONES.
It should be bloodier.
Is it not strange that >>211 and one who sat opposite side of RJ-45 type connection start fighting.
It is cool that situation >>211 will kill him or >>211 will be killed by him.
Girls and kids should keep away.
Well, as soon as >>211 had sat barely, a man who had sat beside me said
"I want talk Takuan"
So >>211 gotta angry again."Hey boy ! With Takuan is not popular now."
He was stupid to say "Takuan" with the happiest simle.
>>211 wanted to ask him "Do you really want to talk about it ?",
and to question colosely, and to interrogate for about one hour.
>>211 thought him just wanted to say "Takuan".
A specialist of StinkGeek, >>211 like to say that the finest topic is "Squeeks".
That is the coolest.
"Kusosure Squeeks with a waltzing matilda "
it is the most popular style of us, the cult of StinkGeek.
Squeeks is full with much feces.
Instead of that it's with mere defecation.This is so good.
And it with a fresh jumbuck. This is the best.
However there is an accident you will be on the staffs' mark next time,if you mention one.
It is a sword which has sevral blades.
It is not recommendable for the laymen.
You, poor laymen, had better talk regular topic with farts and cow droppings.
>>212 has created hundreds of altered versions of the Yoshinoya Rant.
>>215 has a Japanese address just to vote in manga character popularity polls.
>>216 has a Japanese proxy just to read the /b/ board at 2chan.
>>217 has a Japanese proxy just to raid the /b/ board at 2chan.
>>224 won't stop talking about how much better Gopher and Veronica were than the WWW.
>>225 keeps Archie running in an undisclosed location, its virtual and physical addresses known only to a few trusted Elitists
>>227 decided to take a crack at running a Windows ME-based website and developed a security system for it so advanced and secure that web developers all over the world promptly formatted their FreeBSD/Linux/unix/Solaris drives to install WinME.
>>228 has been working for twelve years on his own experimental operating system. It doesn't have a name yet, but it'll be great, just you wait and see.
>>234 is working on a science fair exhibit about radioactive wedding cakes.
>>237 runs several strategically-located uranium enrichment facilities.
>>238 farts plutonium and power plants are fueled by the sweat from his brow. When they plug him in, the lights go out in Hong Kong.
...no, wait, we've somehow gone out the back side of "geek" and crossed over into "crazy awesome."
>>239 Has unlicensed nuclear accelerators that can take out a ghost from a mile away, and unlike the other unlicensed nuclear accelerators, this one will not hurt anyone if the streams are crossed, or if someone looks into the trap.
>>250 thinks describing his own actions would make the previous poster sound more nerdy by comparison. He is sadly mistaken.
>>254 is upset that he was not one post later, because he wanted his post number to be the highest unsigned 8-bit integer.
>>258 has all possible vericodes accessible from a drop-down menu below the entry field.
>>259 only uses the finest crunchy vericodes coated in chocolate for his posts, having an elaborate and complex ranking system of all possible vericodes.
>>260 complains to the mayor about the lack of maid cafés in his hometown.
>>261 Cross dresses in a maid costume, and pours coffee, then takes off that costume, and drinks the coffee, in order to believe he is in a maid café.
>>264 uses GMod to create preposterous little cartoons he posts to Youtube.
>>265 watches these cartoons even though he doesn't even have a Steam account.
>>266 posts on DQN even though he doesn't even have an internet connection.
>>267 will never have children but dreams of naming his offspring after his verification codes on DQN
>>268 can't desid whether his own verification codes are readable enough for that.
>>271 has been searching for the secret of invisibility his whole life.
>>272 was known in high school as 'that kid in the back who never talks and always draws anime characters'.
>>273 can only communicate through drawings of anime characters.
This post was brought to you via image-recognition cognitive AI.
>>275 slacks off in class by doing doing the homework for next semester's classes
>276 did his homework in the library during lunch instead of hanging out with friends.
>>279 thought it would be funny if he made his friends take the Turing test.
>>280 starts a new game every time he dies to simulate life in The Zone as realistically as possible.
>>281 spends a significant portion of his time in advocacy of free and open-source software.
>>282 Built his own spacecraft to land on the moon, and plant his own flag. What is written on the flag is a code that can only be understood by the nerdiest of nerds.
>>283 translated that from the insane ramblings of Renard Queenston's fursona's psychotic episodes.
>>286 spent hundreds of dollars trying to buy pax-tsukuru.com.
>>286 sincerely dedicated himself to memorizing 1,000 digits of pie after hearing 'White And Nerdy'.
>>288 can recite phi to the billionth digit. In fact, a recording of him doing so is his Windows start-up sound.
>>289 is pitching a crossover of Undercover Boss and Undercover Brother.
>>290 spent all his savings on hiring professional ghostwriters to write his Kyon/Itsuki slash stories.
>>291 was so excited about his Kyon/Itsuki slash story that he tweeted each new sentence written.
>>292 has a twitter account for each of his fingers. He makes sure to update all of them at least three times per hour, even though he is the only one who will ever read the tweets.
>>294 prevents his family from enjoying scientific television specials by arguing the truth of each statement.
>>295 is constantly trying to find a way to become an anime character.
>>297 leaves his dirty plates on his bedroom floor, in the shape of star constellations
>>299's walls, on the other hand, are covered with pages of the Unicode 5.0 standard.
>>300 will do your vector calculus homework in exchange for a hot kiss.
>>303 Made a parody of 18 and Life by Skid Row listing many of the times he committed cybercrimes.
>>309 has irrational reservations about using any operating system newer than 4.3 BSD.
>>315 doesn't speak in English, he speaks in ASM. Consequently, 'push' and 'pop' are his favorite words.
>>316 enjoyed cheating on the games he played in the 80s. Consequently, PEEK and POKE are his favourite words.
>>317 has read SICP multiple times. Consequently, his other car is a cdr.
>>321 has written an AI algorithm that detects recursive jokes with 94% accuracy.
>>326 works extensively on a script that makes vi a serious competitor to Emacs in its ability to read and write email.
>>329 draws pornographic webcomics starring himself and the BSD daemon in ASCII art, in order to be fully lynx compatible..
>>330 misses the good old days when Linux distributions still required extensive knowledge of computer science to install.
>>331 misses the good old days when the damn computer hardware itself sometimes came improperly wired but it was okay because the manufacturer also gave you a copy of the schematics so you could fix it yourself.
>>333 prefers the good old days when all computers used relays instead of those new-fangled vacuum tubes.
>>334 doesn't trust new, unproven technologies like vacuum tubes and surfs the Web using an abacus.
>>335 holds an acoustic coupler to his face rather than trusting a machine to decode the modem signals properly.
>>337 Holds the world record for biggest painting made by only entering X and Y values with color values.
>>338 is the one who commissioned it, and has it hanging on his bedroom wall
>>339 has every single item sold by ThinkGeek on his wishlist.
>>342 has written a truly random number generator in only five lines of Ook!.
>>343 finds Ook! too easy and programmed his OS entirely in INTERCAL.
>>348 is porting FreeBSD to the Intel 4044 four-bit microprocessor.
>>352 is starting a business where he will sell perfect vacuum pumps and massless frictionless chain.
>>353 has a small business website that sells cute Darth Vader plushies. His brilliant viral marketing techniques soon generated him enough monthly revenue to allow him to live in his mother's basement permanently.
>>354 lives in an abandoned missile silo filled with the components for his latest electronic attempt at world domination.
>>355 bought a hovercraft for the sole purpose of filling it with eels.
>>356 bought an empty oil drum for the sole purpose of making the world's largest Giga Pudding, and incidentally encouraging obesity.
>>358 Is so successful at credit card hacking that he has spent as much as every nation's national debt.
>>359 built an electric car capable of driving from Fairbanks to Miami without needing to be recharged.
Many's the time >>362 has enjoyed the unique physical properties of baby oil (incidentally the subject of his latest term paper).
>>363 is so literal-minded that he refuses to use "baby oil" that isn't made from real babies.
>>366 wrote a Blue Sphere level editor in BRAINFUCK then created another 100 million levels.
>>367 wrote a programming language that makes Brainfuck look like BASIC in comparison. He then programmed a new Unix shell in it.
>>369 Makes so many scientific tests that there are no more theoretical physics.
>>370 has a very complex and nearly incomprehensible theory about that.
>>373 has surpassed the need for cars by perfecting his solar-powered jetpack.
>>374 is so nerdy that he refuses to use a jetpack without first putting on a silver jumpsuit and goggles.
>>375 wishes the Cybermen from Doctor Who were real and coming to upgrade him.
>>379 is writing a 10 kg book about the various nuances of fighting the supernatural.
>>381 once went a whole day without thinking about computers or mathematics. The night after, he had a curiously abstract wet dream. He awoke to find a proof of Fermat's last theorem written on the bedsheets in his own semen.
>>382 attempted to do the same thing, but the next morning what he found written in semen was "I have discovered a most marvellous proof, but this bedsheet is not wide enough to contain it."
>>383 Also attempted the same feat, and then farted Morse code for a month, and decoded, would be the method for building a time machine capable of moving the entire population of China in one trip.
>>387 once went to the bank to cash a paycheck for $1024, and when they asked him how he wanted it back, he asked for two $256's and four $128's.
>>388 would have preferred one $512, one $256, one $128 and so on, such that the sum of the denominations would tend towards $1024 until the teller gets annoyed.
... which is just fine, because >>390 is the bartender, and his bar is located in Hilbert's hotel.
>>391 has an infinite number of cigars, and he's happy to share, just don't tell his boss.
>>393 cannot chuckle without snorting. He is also the only person within 50 miles of his home who still finds Dilbert amusing.
>>395 had his mouth surgically sealed to bear a closer resemblance to Dilbert.
>>396 wears kitty ears 24/7 and has applied to legally change his name to Catbert.
>>397 wore a trench coat and all of his electronics made him look like an upgraded version of Inspector Gadget
>>398 attached electronic parts to his body, claiming to be "borgifyink" himself.
>>399 read User Friendly even after it stopped being an Internet phenomenon.
>>402 translated that to Swahili and back, just because he can.
>>404 covered every song in the "ITT we chose the wrong genre to cover a song" thread.
>>408 once built a robot to write more Asimovesque short stories. It committed suicide.
>>409 demands a moeblob robot waifu who will cosplay with him.
>>411 Made a computer past the turing test because he is an expert at cross dressing.
>>416 bought a bear-suit pyjama so he could be closer to Lain.
>>417 bought a Tauntaun sleeping bag so he could be closer to Luke.
>>418 Built the world's fastest Segway. He set the speed record at the Bonneville Salt Flats, Daytona raceway, and the Gainsville drag race.
Leaves his computer on all night torrenting bizarre japanese fetish porn.
>>420 is building a time machine with the express intention of sending BitTorrent technology and a large portion of bizarre japanese fetish porn into the early 90s to accelerate the development of bizarre japanese fetish porn.
>>422 wears a panda suit and invites people to punch him on the streets of Brooklyn.
>>424 was convinced a plastic surgeon to turn him into a catgirl free-of-charge.
>>426 scans ukiyo-e plates and uses reaction images from them.
>>427 gives his USB flash drives names like "Sparkle" and "Starburst"
>>428 scoffs at anyone who uses USB flash drives, and instead carries around multiple external hard drives.
>>430 Will recover your data from a crashed hard drive for free, so long as you have bizarre porn on it.
>>431 will do it with or without the bizarre porn, because he loves hard drives that much.
>>432 wept when his hard drive died, carries around its lifeless corpse in his pocket and calls it "onii-chama" during long dark nights at home, alone.
>>434 Is a van customizing nerd that made a copy of the 1980s Ninja Turtle van, A-team van, and a VW Microbus from some film about pot smokers.
>>435 added warp nacelles to his van, and wired them up to light up realistically when the engine is running.
>>436 was voted "most likely to be arrested for driving a consistent eighty-eight miles per hour in the middle of town during a thunderstorm"
>>437 drives at breakneck speed across the country looking for towns that resemble those from Pokemon games.
>>439 has a party comprised of six Mudkips, each nicknamed one letter to spell the word "MUDKIP."
>>440 has taught himself carpentry in order to make as much mudkip-shaped furniture as humanly possible.
>>441 Can quote the entire Chinpokomon South Park episode in 20 different languages.
>>442 fitted an anemometer in his toilet so he could measure how hard he pees each time, then makes graphs using the data
>>443 did the same, and trying to correlate the measurements with sunspot cycles, the orbits of the planets, and stock market data.
>>444 built a miniature replica of Stonehenge out of Sharp X68000 cases.
>>446 cannot parse citation syntax because is posting from from an Atari Falcon.
>>447 Remakes the worst Atari 2600 games for modern consoles. He just finishing making a Custer's Revenge remake for Nintendo wii.
>>448 requested it and is even now practicing his hip-thrust action.
>>449 is writing a GameFAQs guide for the Custer's Revenge remake.
>>450 is a beta-reader for Custer's Revenge crossover fanfiction.
>>451 Is offering a huge amount of money to the AVGN if he plays both the old and new Custer's Revenge, and does a side by side comparison of both.
>>452 has written the movie script and is pitching it to major studios even now. Coming to theaters near you, summer 2012, CUSTER'S REVENGE! The biggest action blockbuster of the 21st Century!!!!!111one
>>454 Is the Chevrolet nerd who made sure his post number is the same as a famous Chevy engine.
>>456 almost barely said "same person" because of its status as an old meme.
>>458 has been having an identity crisis ever since an older version of him decided to travel back to the past to mooch off his younger self.
>>459 writes mock-ups of barely operable software and then sells them on the internet proclaiming them to be "ALPHA AS FUCK"
>>460 uses Minecraft's redstone wires to build his SNES emulator.
>>462 sells Blu-Ray recordings of 1080p YouTube videos of Minecraft on eBay, sending the video authors mocking messages every time he makes a sale.
>>463 created a port of YouTube for Minecraft, mostly so that players would never have to leave the game to watch Minecraft videos.
>>465 browses the web in Lynx, fully aware that there are better text-based browsers out there but being too stubborn to switch. If there is a site he cannot display properly, he just never visits it.
>>466 uses a Perl script to parse plaintext from every site he wants to visit, not even bothering to use decent formatting.
>>468 Is a German nerd that hates Minecraft, so he created a virus to destroy it. It is called "Neincraft" and it also does the things mentioned in Weird Al's song Virus Alert.
>>471 memorized Holy Grail really well, he can recite it right now, and have you ROTFLOL
>>473 is porting his favorite dating sim to the Commodore 64.
>>474 has made a Dwarf Fortress anime, manga, three video game spinoffs, convention,drama disc, anime based off of the game based off of the anime based off of the game, and a manga based off of that.
All by himself.
(No, he's not ZUN)
>>475 bought a +dwarven body pillow+ with an image of a dwarf in pig tail cloth. The dwarf is making a lewd gesture.
>>476 played out the complete history of the Earth using nothing but Dwarf Fortress, from the beginning until now.
>>478 achieved everything ZUN has ever done one morning before breakfast. Then he coded a program that will find the meaning of life in less than a millisecond of computing time.
>>485 is obsessed enough with ZUN to have painstakingly gained access to every single CCTV camera in any area he frequents, as well as having installed a few cameras of his own in ZUN's apartment. He is currently working on gaining similar coverage of Weird Al's activities.
>>486's post number reminds him of his favourite old CPU, which still serves him well in his print server.
>>490 porn collection consists of pictures of motherboards.
All of them are over 18 years of age.
>>491 has seen all porn on the Internet, even of the most obscure fetishes
I find it fairly disturbing that my captcha is "sex". Really.
And I bet >>493 did that to me on purpose, to vicariously satisfy his captcha fetish.
>>497 said that before to a woman but meant it as a serious chatup line
>>498 has never talked to a woman before. Even his mother was too creeped out by him.
despite literally hundreds of thousands of posts on dozens of boards over a period of time that is now almost a decade,
>>499
has never scored a significant GET
>>501 insists on using his tripcode, everywhere, to the point that he's affixed to his back a gigantic cardboard slab painted #EFEFEF, with his tripcode in bright #CCFFCC, MS PGothic.
>>502 used an expensive color calibrator to make sure the shade of paint matched up to a PC monitor response curve in fairly normal outdoor lighting, and was dissatisfied that it would not look exactly correct with even minor changes in lighting.
>>503 Paints every room in hous house to look like the Tron game grid.
>>504 Models for a pocket-protector catalog and is also the publisher of said catalog.
>>506 Has a pocket protector with more extra functions than Batman's belt, Speed Racer's car, and Inspector Gadget's coat combined.
>>508 invented a wrapper class in Java called Mittens, its purpose of which is turning data types into strings and enclosing the resultant text in parentheses. He believes that in this way all data will become winter-safe, thus keeping it warm should it fall into disuse.
I don't care if >>509 is a nerd because that is a brilliant idea
>>511 Invented a virus that hacks into each sound princess ever built. I makes the sound of a young woman taking a loud enormous crap.
>>512 is so geeky that he didn't have to look up what a "sound princess" is. He's also so geeky that he was afraid to seize the power-of-two-GET for fear it would make him look even more geeky.
>>513 Invented a computer program that searches for boards like this, with threads that are going to have a significant GET number.
He has 666 666GETs bragging about his collection or Iron Maiden stuff.
When all the regulars from >>514's favorite IRC channel had a meet-up, he was the nerdiest guy there.
>>516 Invented a nerdy currency where all coins have a famous scientist or sci-fi author in them, and all of them are a power of 2 number.
>>517 collects and eats devalued Zimbabwean currency, then writes online reviews about each vintage.
>>518 prints devalued Zimbabwean currency from his mother's basement
>>520 Beat Silver Surfer for the Nintendo NES. He didn't use an emulator or save states.
>>527 was been turned into the machine code by an evil wizard in D&D.
>>528 is responsible for the "I wish. It's machine code" image macro/meme from the Imageboard that Shall Not Be Named.
>>529 is responsible for every single meme that originated from that board in 2005.
>>531 is torn between buying media to support artists and 'copying' it from WWW.
>>532's fiber optic connection always finishes his downloads before he can make that decision.
>>533's fiber optic connection terminates in an Ethernet plug that he connects directly to a socket in the side of his skull. ...wait a minute, did we wrap around from "nerd" all the way to "crazy awesome?"
>>534 runs every single one of his music files through professional audio tools just to make sure he gets perfect EQ.
>>535 Created the entirety of this article http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Unnamed_USS_Enterprise_%28NCC-1701-D%29_personnel
>>537 shouts, "Madre de dios! Es el pollo diablo!" on any occasion.
>>539 carries pocketfuls of dissimilar items in order to show off his MacGuyver-esque skill set every chance he gets.
>>540 gets an erotic thrill when his psychological stab-in-the-dark personal posts hit home. Also everyone calls him "nerdy" behind his back.
>>543's life story inspired someone in Kyoto to create Lucky Star.
>>544 hunts with an antique 14th-century muzzle-loading hand cannon.
Sometimes it hits.
>>545 Invented his own gun and took it to the firing range. It blew up half the building, and he was banned from all gun ranges after that. The people who witnessed it paid him a fortune for him to build more guns, enabling him to repair the gun range. >>545 also had enough money to build his own gun range, buy the first Spider Man comic book ever made, 28 animation cells from the most famous scenes in anime, 5 of the most famous Nissan GT-R models, and a house that has a copy of the interior of the Starship Enterprise. He still has enough money in the bank to retire comfortably.
>>546's rambling, too-detailed messages comprise the majority of Larry Niven's fan mail.
>>548 has a T-shirt with a sarcastic regular expression.
>>551 giggles like a school girl at jokes hidden in google, such as http://www.google.com/search?&q=the+loneliest+number
>>553 bought a Malibal Satori for $1300 solely to play Touhou.
>>555 is currently browsing DQN on his work computer.
...and has entered into an infinite recursion of time.
>>557 can't grasp the reason why his colleagues never laugh at his jokes.
When >>560's friends want to push his buttons, they talk about string theory.
When >>561's friends want to pull his strings, they talk about buttons--in which he has nearly an autistic level of interest.
>>565 takes pains to never go anywhere outside of walking distance unless he can make it sound like he beamed in on a Federation transporter while everyone was looking away.
>>566 lives in Stephen Hawking's backyard, teaching himself lockpicking on every door in the house and leaving inspirational gifts and letters for his favourite physicist in the exact centre of every room.
>>567 has a professional digital camera and a collection of expensive lenses (which he carries with him on every Japanese Pop-culture convention).
>>571's normal clothing consists completely of bell-bottomed striped pants, which he wears with the belt just below his armpits, and colorful plaid shirts.
>>572 Has a shape-shifting device that is is clothing. He can reprogram it to be any style he wishes, and can change styles in .01 seconds.
However, >99% of the time, it is a basic lab coat with a pocket protector.
>>573 was voted "most likely to be eaten by a grue" by the members of his Pascal class.
>>574 was voted "most likely to consider Pascal a new-fangled useless gimmick" by the members of his Fortran class.
>>575 advertised a class called "Writing Device Drivers in Brainfuck and INTERCAL" and no one showed up.
>>576 posted to a newsgroup asking whether anybody would like to help him write an OS in Brainfuck and/or INTERCAL, but no one replied.
>>577 created a newsgroup related to writing OSes in Brainfuck and/or INTERCAL
>>581 insists on referring to the Falklands War as the "Argentinian Liberation of British Patagonia Meridional"
>>582 insists on referring to the Falklands War as the "attempted Argentinian Liberation of British Patagonia Meridional". Gotta be precise, yo.
>>583 insists on referring to the Falklands War as the "Liberation of Falkland Islands by Her Majesty's Armed Forces"
>>584 has a mint condition copy of Up The Falklands! Cartoons From The Royal Marines in his collection of cartoon strip books.
>>586 knows how to make incredible hidden camera videos without getting caught.
>>591 Knows what will happen if magical girl anime characters from different series fight each other. He wrote a 100 page book titled "Sailor Moon versus Card Captor Sakura."
>>592 owns the first edition of said book and has never once opened it in order to keep it in mint condition.
>>593 owns three copies. One to read, one to keep in mint condition, and one to give to a friend.
>>594 just put all previous posts to shame with that horrific quote.
>>597 is still wearing a fifteen-year-old t-shift that says "riot nrrrd."
>>599 Has been banned by more Subaru discussion forums by constantly posting "EVO is #1!"
>>600 visits English-language discussion boards to post "HELLO YANKEE! I AM HAPPY JAPANESE! ^________^" and he does it so much that he forgot to seize the 600GET.
When >>601 heard that Osama bin Laden was killed, his first reaction was to post on internet forums about how shameful it was that people in the US were celebrating and dancing in the streets at the grisly death of a human being.
>>602 took photos of himself for the "choking" and "cut-throat" gestures on this page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_gestures
>>603 Invented a device to make his middle finger look like E.T.'s finger, making the gesture that much more effective.
>>605 knows which episodes of Futurama mention a finglonger device.
>>606 correctly referred to "episodes", as the Finglonger appears in more than one episode.
>>609's sex doll has more than one button on it, all custom mods.
>>610 knows everything there is to know about sex dolls, even when they belong to other people. ESPECIALLY when they belong to other people.
>>611 Built a machine that demolishes one old growth forest every time a crappy movie is released that is made boring by environmentalism. He demolished 2 old growth forests because he hated Avatar so much.
>>612 Was angry that his parents sent to him to a Christian private school. In order to get kicked out, he replaced every Bible passage that said "By the power of God" and stuff like that with "By the power of Castle Greyskull."
>>613 Took pictures of himself ejaculating on a He-man action figure.
>>614 provided the context for each de-geso in http://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm13270872
It took him all day, but it needed to be done.
>>616 secretly writes compilers for every other language in Brainfuck, treating his strange hobby as the ultimate techno-fetish.
>>618 obsessively three-starred all of Angry Birds just to "prove" that casual games are easy and they suck
>>619 wrote a C program for the perfect Ninja Gaiden speedrun. He only needs to slightly alter five lines of code in order for it to fit any other video game in existence.
>>622 obsessively researches and creates new combinations and permutations of Japanese chat-style emoticons, such as o(∩_∩)o
>>624 can turn any text into a tripcode and vice versa with a single thought, even secure ones.
>>625 is so nerdy he made a (∩ヮ∩) face as he was typing that.
>>626 has a keyboard that is wired to play the MLP theme song on hitting the Enter key.
>>627 has over 100 different types of doors in his house, from all over the world. and changes them every month.
>>628 recorded a video for Life in a Day about the dullness of his life.
...which was then overlooked by editors.
>>631 sells and provides tech support for left-buttock tracking technology. His DRM makes very sure the device will self-destruct exactly 128 hours after being implanted anywhere but a left buttock, inadvertently making it popular with assassins.
>>632 has an ever-growing collection of left-buttocks, sawn off expensive anime figurines.
>>634 flew to Japan in order to attend a Nanoha doujin convention, taking a taxi from the airport to the exhibition centre and back again. He bought three doujins, so the trip was totally worth it.
>>637 initially fucked up the cosplay, but got it right after a 48 hour marathon.
>>638 Was able to do that by using that fat hiding technique in Tenjo Tenje
>>639 is responsible for capturing and submitting most every quote on bash.org.
>>645 wrote a 12000 words essay that is referenced in the "criticism" section of Wikipedia's entry on Spivak pronouns
>>647 has memorized Morohashi's Kanji dictionary. If you give him a Unicode CJK codepoint, he can instantly tell you which page of which volume holds the character's entry, and will recite said entry from memory no matter what you might try to shut him up with.
>>648 is that guy who knows how to find exactly the right AA for any post but has vehemently insisted that he will take his secret to the grave.
>>652 writes furry slash fanfiction about Reverend Moon as an anthro rabbit and Ban Ki Moon as a sheep. Fanart for his story sold for over $25,000 at the last convention auction.
>>654 took pictures of the event from a Russian spy satellite and sold them to satellite porn sites.
>>655 spontaneously orgasmed at the thought of satellite porn sites. With their wide-open solar sails, those sluts are just asking for it ...
>>656 knows exact age of Bender (including all his time travels and such).
>>657 programmed an UTAUloid with the voice inflections of an awkward gaijin.
>>658 felt that a Utah accent would be appropriate for a UTAHloid.
>>659 has a massive database containing phonetic details of every English language accent he has ever heard.
>>660 has a vocaloid library containing his own dialect of English.
>>665 organized a protest against anti-loli regulation, but sadly only he showed up.
>>666 is so nerdy that he failed to seize the Number-of-the-Beast-GET.
>>667 pretends to not be nerdy enough to appreciate that the whole Number-of-the-Beast thing isn't nerdy at all, as opposed to powers of two. Also, 1010011011.
>>669 thinks eroge are more than just weeaboo CYOAs with sexy time. And failed to seize the 69get.
>>672 had a hentai ROM cartridge for his Sega.
>>676 uses a strap to hold his glasses in place because the lens weigh almost as much as him.
>>677 Made an eroge that was even more shitty than Night Shift urses.
>>679 can play a full Starfleet Battles game by himself, without ever referencing a rulebook.
>>680 saw "Night Shift Ursas" and immediately concluded it was a furry eroge involving bear-people, because that's an obsession of his.
>>681 dreams of one day publishing his bear-people eroge at Comiket, where his application has been rejected for the past fifteen years.
>>682 reviews obscure video games in an AVGN-wannabe style, but due to his utter lack of social and acting skills, every scatological joke is given in a muttered, deadpan monotone.
>>683 Bought loads of real buffalo diarrhea to make his AVGN impersonation that much better.
>>686 has devoted his life to becoming the perfect Chester A. Bum impersonator.
OH MY GAWD, >>687 is the nerdiest poster I've ever seen in my life!
>>688 Understands the "nerd irony" of shows like Azumanga Dioah.
>>689 tries to educate people through his funny but practical youtube videos. It was quite a disappointment that only other nerds was watching them for entertainment.
>>690 creates and fills in TVtropes pages for manga titles that haven't been translated at all.
>>691 creates and fills in TVtropes pages for manga titles that don't actually exist, making him not only a nerd but also a troll.
>>692 deletes valuable information from TVtropes pages for existing and translated manga titles while inserting meaningless banter, using hundreds of sock puppets on several dozen proxies. He started trying to do the same on Wikipedia, but accidentally got himself elected to admin for it.
>>694 is writing a Dr. Who/New My Little Pony crossover fanfiction.
>>695's MENSA application was rejected because he attached an essay detailing everything that was wrong with their IQ tests.
>>696 is a proud leader of ttp://anime.scripts.mit.edu/
>>704 Has a robot that is on trial at robot court for violation of Asimov's laws.
>>706 hasn't yet realized it, but 706 is the ugliest number in this thread.
(＼
(＼(＼ /)
(＼(＼ /).
(＼＼＼ ./)):
( ( ヾ ) ヾ)
:(／し ／⌒ヽ It's okay to be a nerd, >>708.
:(／し .（ ＾ω＾）
:(／:(／⊂ Ｕ ))
(／:((（ノ(ノ ＼
☆
ﾟﾟ｡･ﾟ｡☆ﾟ ∴+
∴+∴
+…∵：∵
∵：：+ ∵ +
+∴ ∵ ：
｡… *
>>709 Built flight capable angel wings in order to crossplay as his favorite bishoujo anime girl.
ends everything he says with de geso~
even among officials and serious businessmen.
>>711 hans out in front of the store that shares a name with his GET.
>>713 are you following me around the internet? That's so weird... I mean the masturbating with my ex-girlfriend's tights on in the kitchen, I was talking about that yesterday
-‐‐- 、
／ ヽ
! ! 人|,.iﾉl_ﾉ）
i 乂-‐ －! i No, Shinji. I just know your habits.
＼ヽ .ゞ - ﾉノ Asuka used to call you a perv, but she had no idea. Honestly.
｀｀フ i´
/ ＼ﾉゝ
/__i |丱!|
━━つ━つ━━∞∞∞========
== THE REI'S DINER ==
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
>>721 keeps correcting people who don't pronounce "booru" as "boh-ru".
>>723 is obsessed with the cartoon series My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
>>724 is always the first to create Rule 34 of any new cartoon.
>>726 writes a list of characters before hunting down rule34 for his evening fap.
>>732 made a remix of the music of Cheetahmen II which subsequently became big in Japan.
>>733 cosplays as various Cheetahmen characters at anime conventions.
>>734 writes Cheetamen II slashfic and posts it at the Pit of Voles.
>>739 Makes the biggest overanalysis of every new movie within minutes of leaving the theater.
>>740 is the founder of the ttp://vndb.org/ web-site.
>>741 is the founder of the http://www.agnph.com/ website.
>>745 is ( ˃ ヮ˂), and apparently wrote almost every post on DQN himself.
>>746 is （ ・∀・）, and he personally wrote nearly every post on DQN between circa September 5100th and September 5339th, 1993.
>>748
Made himself a XXXL t-shirt with ttp://twitter.com/503 printed on it.
>>751 Has a huge shirt which has the instructions for loading a C64 game.
>>753 took a silkscreening class just to reproduce all of Yui's t-shirts and wear them.
>>755 submitted all the photos and screenshots of old operating systems displaying the Wikipedia home page.
>>759 documents these viruses, giving them titles and creating wiki pages for each of them, updating the version numbers regularly.
>>762 edits the creation dates and names of pictures saved down from 4chan to make them appear several years older than they actually are, just so he can show off what an oldfag he is to his tiny circle of online acquaintances.
>>763 boasts that he had made his own little chan before that horrible Trevorchan/Kusaba plague.
>>767 has been feverishly refreshing on buttchan.net in order to post "FIRST!"
>>769 reads Ars Technica articles religiously, only posting comments to complain and nitpick when he actually understands the topic, which is actually not that often.
>>772 wrote a rhyming Animaniacs fan-song to help him remember the periods of Japanese history.
>>773 posted a chiptune version of it on multiple video-sharing sites.
>>774 posted a video of himself singing the song on Youtube. IN the video he is crossplaying as Dot.
>>775 has received enough checks from Donald Knuth to live comfortably for a year.
>>776 Could not be changed by the Please Please Please Get A Life Foundation.
Whenever >>777 doesn't post to DQN, he continues working on his plans to build a working Degenatron console with all the features advertised in GTA: Vice City. The schematics are almost complete, but hunting down the vintage 1986 breadboards is proving difficult.
The moment a new hit song comes out, >>780 covers it with Mario Paint Composer.
The interior of >>782's home is only accessible through a large, green, stylized pipe.
>>783 Is an action and spy movie nerd that has a fancy biometric lock on his front door. The sewer underneath his house has numerous death traps because in action movies, secretly entering a building through the sewer is a common plot in action movies. His air condition ducts are filled with Van Der Graff generators to zap intruders and sanitize air at the same time.
>>789 Made a fortune by making fake Weird Al signed memorabilia.
>>792 Likes Dragon Ball Z and South Park equally, so he will take a crap that is over 9000 Courics
>>793 wrote a long, scathing email to Squeeks admonishing him for allowing the "ITT The Previous Poster is Socially Awkward" thread to stay up when its content overlaps almost entirely with this thread.
>>795 likes to wait 85 seconds for the captcha to refresh instead of 60 because he thinks an aged captcha is better than a new cheap one.
>>795 also waits for 85 seconds between posts without refreshing captcha, so that his captcha is vintage.
>>796 was one of the first hellbans on Something Awful. To this day, he still doesn't realize it.
>>799 openly sneered about not getting 800get, but secretly was disappointed.
>>802 is a world champion of the Unicycle Jousting Tournament.
>>804 became interested in unicycle jousting and is looking for the best unicycle available on the mass market.
>>807 imports bad (yet highly expensive) Japanese Techno CD's just to complain about them on his blog.
Screams, "THE WHEEL OF FAT IS TURNING" every time he starts something.
>>810 Dropkicked the improv workshop mimeshow gobshite facepaint Left Bank Kenneth Emma R-A-D-A Rainer Werner - Cokeheads cokeheads cokeheads
>>811 bought the most expensive air brush to colour his favourite figurine.
>>812 keeps an entire copy of the Common Lisp HyperSpec in his mind and has dedicated content-addressable neural networks for quick access to it.
"I've always wanted to have all my holes filled with dozens of ochinchins"
->>815>>817 uses a Steel Battalion controller to drive a Roomba around while making Gundam noises.
>>820 Is the world's biggest Brony, that was determined by the value of all his My Little Pony collectibles
>>821 started collecting My Little Pony, Care Bears, Rainbow Brite, Strawberry Shortcake, and Jem merchandise years ago, hedging his bets that one of them would eventually get rebooted and become insanely popular.
>>822 Made an independent film that glorified the '80s My Little Pony, Strawberry Shortcake, and Care Bears and bashed the reboot versions that came decades later in such a snobby way, that the N.Y. Times hired him to be a film critic.
>>822 is working on a roguelike where you're not War but rather Pestilence. Also, they're all ponies.
And when >>825 had opened the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see.
And I looked, and beheld a pale pony: and his name that sat on him was Death, and awkward, thread-ending posts followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the Internets, to kill with sarcasm, and with stale copypasta, and with overused memes, and with the lolcats of the earth.
>826 eats ramen every meal not because he likes it or can't afford food, but because he is under the mistaken impression that all ramen is made by a company that trademarked the recipe for ramen, and they advertise in every anime and manga. That's why he has all the packages in his room, they are collectors' items, not trash. He bought the '76 Top Ramen Limited Winter Edition shrimp/chicken gift pack from before they changed the package design off ebay as an investment in order to secure the funds to purchase a genuine '32 Daimyo stainless steel diesel-powered noodle maker of the factory design.
>>827 authors Youtube poops of obscure cartoon shows from his childhood.
>>828 created a moe anthropomorphization of Moe Anthropomorphism itself.
The national guard has been called in, but they're mainly there to aid the evacuation effort.
>>829 changed his name to Moe Anthropomorphization, and is trying to talk his girlfriend into changing her name to Tsundere.
>>830 collects the fart gas from his fat ass for experimental homemade bomb construction.
>>831 is making a life-size replica of that japanese town used for background images in Lucky Star with only bricks made from his shit.
>>833 drinks alcohol-free beer in hopes to become more mature.
>>835 finds it difficult to partake in his favorite alcoholic concoctions without donning steampunk garb.
>>838 has spent many a bored night spamming his group's Ventrilo channel with various such absurd things.
>>839 invented Ventrilo harassment, and still wears a ratty old Duke Nukem t-shirt that says "I've got balls of steel."
>>840 Wears a mask that has a perfect ahegao facial expression on it.
>>842 always begins his phrases with "sudo", because he wants to sound important.
>>844 wears a t-shirt that says "Linux is for people who hate Bill Gates. FreeBSD is for people who love UNIX."
>>845 Every time NASA finds another planet that resembles Earth, he shoots it with his Genesis Device. One time he accidentally pulled the trigger twice, destroying a great civilization.
>>846 misread "Tandy corp." as "Tsundere" and has spent the last thirty-three years trying to melt the ice around his computer's heart.
When >>847 makes chiptunes, he uses a genuine sound chip every time. He built a music machine that has a SID, Paula, YM2612, and 41 other retro sound chips
>>849 corrects people that say "GNU/Linux" by saying "GNU, Linux, X, and many other essential components are part of a modern OS, and Linux as a collective term works well enough."
>>853 promised himself to spend Christmas alone, but went to DQN nonetheless.
>>856 goes to parties cosplaying as Sailor Moon--whether they are costume parties or not.
>>856 goes to parties cosplaying as Sailor Moon, without shaving his Unix beard before.
>>858 Invented a beard that can change its own shape with robotic hair.
>>860 believes that he's "VIP quality" just because he knows where the secret area of VIP quality is.
>>861 relies on his own judgement to decide whenever something is VIP quality or not.
>>864 Played every NES game with the Power Glove to see what doesn't work. After he did that, he got his Famicom to NES adapter to see what would happen with Famicom exclusive games.
>>866 Used an LJN Rollin' Rocker to control a Linux beard, the result was that the Unix beard shaved itself.
>>867 has been declared a hostile foreign power by the CIA after building a working, armed replica of the tank from Master Blaster.
>>868 Has a Gibson Flying V guitar that actually flies, up to mach 2.2 at an altitude of 90,000 feet.
>>869 killed himself, believing he would go to Gensokyo and meet an unnamed book-reading youkai.
>>871 Attached a microchip to his brain so he can control machinery without even pushing a button or giving a voice command.
>>874 is John C. Brandstetter, longing to recapture the good old days of *zark*ing FEKA goons.
>>875 can't really believe in himself. But he'd really love to.
>>876 Loved Top Gun and After Burner games so much, he built a jet that looks like an F-14 Tomcat. However, his look alike is capable of vertical takeoff, stealth, and reaches speeds of Mach 3.5.
>>877 has built a device which predicts coming changes in the Japanese economy by sniffing used schoolgirl panties with a robotic nose.
When an anime company releases something that >>878 doesn't like, he hacks the Nikkei to lower the stock price to 1 yen per share.
>>879 hacked the big wall displays at the New York Stock Exchange to say "AVAST YE SWABS, BANK OF AMERICA IS GOING UNDER," causing the 2007 sub-prime mortgage crisis and subsequent economic dislocations.
>>880 contents himself with hacking airport information systems so that all flights with non-prime numbers will show on all screens as being cancelled.
>>881 is a cartography nerd, and currently accepting corrections for his 1:1024 scale map of the United States.
>>884 Makes fan games that feature NES characters, however, the levels they are in are insanely difficult.
>>887 complains to every web-sight that didn't black out today.
>>888 can remember the first 400 digits of pi, but not the location of the g-spot.
>>889 Built a copy of the GoldenEye laser. When it fires, another one of his inventions causes every TV station to say "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAHZOR!"
>>890 is so afraid of social contact that he avoids playing online games.
>>891 Is a Real Drive otaku that has dinner with his darling waifu, and it is an enormous McDonald's burger.
>>894 Calls Lina Inverse his waifu.
He does this: http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/events/dinner-with-waifu-otaku-dates
And he brings 30 kilograms of food to the table.
>>895 contributes financially to the Modern Cheezburger Society of Internet Culture.
>>896 Hates a certain youtube game reviewer, so he created "Locomotive Breath Gamer Reviews" to make fun of him.
>>898 is able to recite every game over speech from every Metal Gear game.
>>900 refused to seize the 900GET because he was afraid it might make us think he was even more nerdy than he actually is.
>>901 makes his own chatbots, in order to feel less lonely without actually having to converse with other humans.
>>902 makes chatbots that talk to one another, so that he won't have to.
>>903 masturbates to Microsoft Comic Chat comics of bots talking with one another because finding doujins to wank off to is something he doesn't wish to get involved in.
Whenever there is a power outage, >>904 plays Hunt the Wumpus by candlelight using punch cards.
>>908 is trying his best to organize Massive Multiplayer Offline game of DnD.
>>911 doesn't suffer from Asperger's Syndrome--he enjoys every moment of it.
>>912 has written a 700,000 word essay on his interpretation of the Touhou canon. Four of its readers promptly erected a shrine to him; the other one deconstructed his arguments in great detail on Nico Nico Douga.
>>913 knew everything about every MLP incarnation by heart long before FiM and bronies was a thing.
>>914 cosplays while writing Visual Novel modes for Emacs under an anaglyphic virtual terminal using the power glove and 3D glasses.
>>916 has sold his stove to buy more RAM. He cooks his meals on his CPU heatsink instead.
>>918 was afraid that people would realize that he was a nerd, were he to use the correct word, "snork".
>>919 loved the old "Snorks" cartoons when he was a kid, almost as much as the "Smurfs." And still writes elaborate fanfiction about both, thirty years later.
>>921 built a Babbage Engine in a cave, using a box of scraps.
>>922 Built a scale model of Arkham City that was so precise, the game's programmers were jealous of it.
>>923 Saw the movie "Human Centipede" and the created a Human Millipede.
>>924 made 2/3 of posts in The previous poster is a computer (ttp://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1330541296).
>>928's idea of fun is discovering and abusing bugs in game physics engines, then uploading footage of them to YouTube.
>>931 liked them better when they were the darkest corners of CERN back in the day.
>>933 is a proud owner of http://dqn.bbs/
>>934 clicked that link and was disappointed that it did not lead to a whole new world of DQNity.
>>935 has no need for a DNS server, as he simply memorises all the IP addresses he needs to visit.
>>936 memorizes all the required IP addresses as a full 32-bit number.
[Is it bad that I still remember the IP addresses of Quartz and Abermud Flathead?]
>>937 still remembers the IP addresses of Quartz and Abermud Flathead. Which isn't bad, but it's very nerdy.
>>938 counted Sir Lancelot's bounty during his assault on Swamp Castle.
>>943's doorbell plays a random file from his MP3 collection. In order to ensure true randomness in the selection algorithm, he has it hooked up to a plutonium source in the basement.
>>944 Programmed a script that will automatically create a 3rd nerd thread the moment this thread reaches 999 posts.
>>946 Created a form of knee surgery so that people who took an arrow to the knee can once again become adventurers.
>>947 founded a Legend of Galactic Heroes LARP group to have some use for his blonde wig collection.
>>949 Is a Megaman nerd that uses a copy of Heat Man to light his cigarettes.
>>950 is currently working out the mathematics necessary to envision a fourth-dimensional Rubik's Cube.
>>953 Doesn't age whiskey in barrels, he synthesizes each ingredient individually, so whiskey that would be aged 18 years would be made in less than 1 hour. He uses a beaker as a shot glass.
>>954 After watching an episode of PSG, he made boxer shorts that can turn into grenades.
>>955 has watched every episode of PSG and wants to cosplay as "Stocking." But he doesn't really have the legs for it.
>>956 is the kind of anime otaku who frothed with nerdrage at the "animesque" trappings of Teen Titans and Avatar: The Last Airbender. When PSG and its westernised artstyle appeared, he took it as an omen of the impending apocalypse and built himself a bunker out of his beloved laserdisc collection.
>>957 Has a room full of stuff from Spaceballs. To enter, you must type 1234 into the keypad, or use The Schwartz.
>>958 Has at least 999 units of every fictional video game currency.
>>960 Dressed up as Garterbelt from PSG when he went to church and when he went to the disco.
>>961 wears massive glasses and a pocket protector which he believes to be ironic about nerds, but the irony is on him.
>>962 Took scenes from various adult anime, and created an AMV that features Whip It by Devo
>>964 Knows every cliche from mecha anime, and animated them all at once.
>>967 Created his own "Revenge of The Nerds" movie, but it was about the AVGN and friends taking revenge on people who produce really bad video games.
>>968 didn't win any prizes since high school science fairs, so he works twice as hard on a time travel machine.
>>969 faithfully follows Charles Atlas DYNAMIC-TENSION lessons
>>970 kicks sand in the face of muscular guys at the beach. The irony is sadly lost on them.
>>972 has a life-sized replica Lance of Longinus towering over his backyard. His neighbors use it to find their way around town without a map.
>>973 Created the Maxwell Smart phone. It is a shoe that can be used as a cellphone, and run any Android app.
（￣へ￣） Hello. I am "Mr. Likes To Sage Threads". I do believe this is a thread in need of Sage, so I would like to sage it. That is why my name is "Mr. Likes To Sage Threads".
>>975 posts in so many different threads on thousands of boards simultaneously, that sometimes he confuses one thread for another.
>>976 has already designed an UI for Stephen Hawking for the case of complete paralysis.
>>977 Stole an electrolarynx from a chain smoker, and made prank calls, pretending to be Stephen Hawking.
>>978 autotunes Stephen Hawking lectures to make it sound like he's singing along to Touhou music.
>>979 Creates Smurf fan fiction where Stephen Hawking is known as "Wheelchair Smurf."
>>980 Created a real life version of Angry Birds. The birds are albatrosses and the pigs are peccaries.
>>983 works for Microsoft and hopes to continue following in Gabe Newell's footsteps.
One of >>983's scripts automatically incremented the post number he had typed, even though he hadn't asked for it. The script is gradually becoming self-aware.
>>986 Is a perverted video game remixer. His latest song is a remix of Outrun - Magical Sound Shower. He calls it Golden Sound Shower.
>>987 has several terabytes of hard drive space filled with video game remixes.
>>988 Takes hit songs and replaces the rhythm with 8-bit sounds.
>>991 Can name all of the independent movies made by James Rolfe.
>>992 has an encyclopedic knowledge of every viral internet video ever made.
>>993 Has a laboratory that covers 5 square miles, and Igor is an assistant there.
The walls of >>994's house are painted with sprites of every type of 8-bit era enemy he has vanquished so far.
>>995 Has beaten all those enemies, so he went back, and beat them again, except he only used the crappiest weapons in those 8-bit games.