>>2 The time of the joke
>>3-6 List of items required
>>7-12 Step by step instructions
>>13 Title of the joke
>>14 The target of the joke

three bananas

A bottle of hot sauce

A hundred dollars worth of monkey feces

A can of deodorant

1. Seduce >>14's girlfriend and/or pet monkey using the bananas and enlist her/its aid for the joke.

2. Teach it how to use deodorant, and (this is critical) how not to use deodorant.

3. Treat >>14 to dinner at a fine Mexican restaurant several times so as to give him a taste for spicy foods.

Flirting is a way to feel good about yourself, because if the person flirts back it becomes a "Im still attractive". The problem is however how the flirting is being done.

If a person is going to a night club and flirting with people it is a problem in my eyes. More so if the partner is going without YOU.

On the flip side of it, you say you are in a long distance relationship and well people need to be constantly told of their likeness. Flirting is a way to do that, but in the heat of the moment flirting can lead to more things if both people want to... be it a conscious thing or a sub-conscious thing.

4. Confuse >>14 by placing an unrelated post half way through the thread. When he isn't watching, take one of the bananas and smear it with a liberal brushing of monkey faeces.

5. Show the bottle of hot sauce to >>14 and offer the banana. Explain it's a local delicacy, spicy banana. Once >>14 eats the banana, reveal that it was covered in monkey feces.

The French Twist

Aw maaaan.

Now let's play a joke on >>29!
>>15 The mastermind
>>16 Time of the joke
>>17-21 List of items required
>>22-27 Step-by-step instructions
>>28 Title of the joke
>>29 The chump

About 07:12, just after >>29 gets out of the shower

2 kg of delicious pudding

A healthy amount of lubricant and a small tub of aphrodisiac herbs

one fancy hearing cake

A first edition vinyl record of Title

8 gallons of pig blood

1. Remove the lid carefully. Apply antifreeze, anti-hydrogen and arsenic to the wound before lathering the area of affect in the solution. Chant the name of whichever game you played last, followed by the platform of operation. Continue removing the lid. Do not falter upon incantation, or else.

Wait, wait. I'm all out of antihydrogen, but I just got a few milligrams of pure anti-nickel-iron alloy, right here in the magnetic suspension bottle. Will this do as a substitute?

2. Eat the fancy hearing cake. While under its influence, sneak into a library at night and replace all the computer keyboard keys with letter 'A' keys.

3. Mix together the pudding, aphrodisiac herbs and pig blood. Apply lubricant to the vinyl record, but leave some for step 4.

4. Hand >>29 the vinyl record. Being lubricated, it will slip right out of his hands! Wait for him to bend over to pick it up, then do the final step.