>It always seemed insulting that things like "masculinity" and "femininity" are boiled down to aesthetic and product preferences, the kind of thing I thought we were more or less moving past seeing as gendered.

I agree, I have some trans friends, male and female, who said they weren't into girly things like ponies and make-up when they were young and so they decided they must be a boy (and vice versa) isn't that just reinforcing gender stereotypes?