Please don't bash me or diss me for this... (26)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 04:29 ID:YVrNMtok This thread was merged from the former /love/ board. You can view the archive here.

I'd really appreciate it if you guys can give me good advice, and not just stupid dissing about how naive or stupid I am.

I want to marry a japanese guy. I know I am probably being really one-dimensional and naive, but that is what I want.

The problem is, I don't know where am I supposed to meet a Japanese guy. I mean, I see some at school, but they are all taken or just don't seem to be interested in me.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 04:39 ID:dVye21wW

  1. Save up for a holiday to Japan.
  2. Join a language exchange program.
  3. Personal ads...

I would use #2 myself.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 04:54 ID:QxP7odGX

Well, if you are truly serious you should probably learn the language. That would be a big step towards your goal. And if that goes to hell, move to Canada. We got lots to share.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 04:56 ID:YVrNMtok

But do you guys think that I am just being really stupid and maybe not thinking really rationally to think that?

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 05:14 ID:1rR40VJx

nah^^ everyone is interested in different things I guess
I guess it depends on your reasons...

oh and btw where do you live (don't have to tell us where) but I mean like country or continent so at least we can help you more

lol as the saying goes "detail requested"

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 05:44 ID:YVrNMtok

I live in the US.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 05:51 ID:92TZpMdH
even though it's not really for dating

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 06:27 ID:4a7UV9El

Hawaii...more asians in the state than any other state in the US.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 07:51 ID:3oKibzwU

how old are r u btw

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 08:08 ID:8Pv9tPe/

Um... Can I ask why you want to marry a Japanese Man? It doesn't sound like your looking for love... So?

11 Name: G Otoko!AboRDsJIEk : 2006-03-17 08:36 ID:yAC2P9vi

Have you thought about going on the JET program? You can become a teacher in Japan and that way you can meet lots of different Japanese men in one go and get paid to do it!

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 09:36 ID:YFhJUHVy

i'm 18.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 10:01 ID:vDrFGpT/

How many Japanese men have you actually met? It is also foolish to marry someone because of their race. It is more offensive to the person than flattering.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 11:07 ID:Heaven

Japanese men are afraid of foreign women. They like the docile Japanese women. Also your idea is pretty dumb. But don't let that stop you ('-')b

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 12:10 ID:rD2UhwCQ

>>1 japanese men are pretty coward and domestic
and that's true good ones are taken, especially in the states
also not many of us understand english
i recommend you to look for some quality american guy

>>14 how did you get your ID:Heaven!?

16 Name: Aquilo : 2006-03-17 12:57 ID:2VdpLa/1

depends if you are going for the japanese mentality or just a japanese person there is alot of open japanese people in Canada XD

and well actually some japanese likes to go for foreign women (note the word "some") they think its like a rare prize or something lol hmm you know... with the western fasination thing... so who knows try your luck I guess^^

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 13:06 ID:Heaven

happens automagically when you sage. ps, i'm not >>14

18 Name: sage : 2006-03-17 13:17 ID:rD2UhwCQ

>>17 thx

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 15:40 ID:ALqDBACr

I'm from Poland and I know one girl that was studying japanese culture. She had her trip to japan and she came back with japanese husband. Now they are publishing mangas in my country.

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 21:39 ID:Lzk3hrW7

I know i can come across as being shallow, but I like to think that like some people may want their boyfriend to be taller than them, or have a great smile, or are caring, I just have the criteria of them being Japanese. I mean, I really don't see anything wrong with that...

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 21:47 ID:Lzk3hrW7

Oh, and btw I am Chinese.

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-17 23:14 ID:an71qDQa

I am curious, what do you think of as being the stereotype japanese male that you wish to marry? Hmm?

Can't blame you though, people have different preferences. I prefer gamer geeks, I later hooked up with a gamer geek. However, naturally that isn't the sole reason for why. But the positive things i associate with gamer geeks were prerequisits for me to be able to start finding him suitable to start a relationship with. That wasn't the ultimate reason for why.

What I'm trying to say in a very clumsy manner: beware of being with someone only because a certain label can be applied to them. Do NOT settle with someone that is just "okay" or "good enough".
Be with someone because they're bent the way you like them to be (have that label), as well as really fitting you and your life/goals well when it comes to being in a serious, longterm relationship. Love alone does not make a good, stable marriage, and nor does finances alone. There needs to be both a mutual feeling of love (intensity may vary, as long as they're not too mismatched it's not a problem) as well as that you two must be able to work well (or at least decently enough) as team-mates in life.

Also, beware of people who put up a false front, and then turn out to be significantly different than the facade they've used. Make sure to not get married to hastly, regardless of how much you're smitten with the person. There are plently of extremely charming psychopats who turn 180 degrees around after enough time, regardless of gender.

Well, not much else to say than ganbare, apologize for not being able to provide good suggestions for how to find good japanese males, and that I have to agree with the #2 at >>2.
Sorry for being so terribly wordy as well.

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-18 19:41 ID:Heaven

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-03-19 02:41 ID:Heaven

yeah, i lol'd too. ps, i'm >>17 :)

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-04-05 02:25 ID:Heaven

Sage goes in the email field.

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