Nothing but questions. (6)

1 Name: ChonChon!VxLFeBl2NY : 2014-07-06 19:18 ID:yY2/cGLf This thread was merged from the former /love/ board. You can view the archive here.

An ex-boyfriend,lets call him Thomas, and I split up a little over a year and a half ago. At the time I was more devastated than I had ever imagined was possible, however I slowly came to realize it was for the best. My best friend John helped me through it, he was always there to listen, and he never got mad when I called him at weird hours. I'd never considered John anything but a friend, and I felt sure he felt the same way.

I feel as though a little information about the events proceeding the break-up is necessary. Thomas always had a bit of a paranoid streak, nothing that would be considered a serious mental issue, but definitely more than the norm.Over the course of the three months before we broke up, he became decreasingly paranoid, and distant. I can't stress enough how drastically he changed, he went from being one of the most happy go lucky guys I'd ever met, to someone I was at times scared of. Not scared of in the sense that I felt he would do physical harm to me, but in the sense that I felt like I was walking on eggshells when I was around him. I tried on several occasions to get him to open up to me about what was bothering him, but he never would.

This past Valentines day irrevocably changed the way I feel about the events leading up to, and after the breakup. John, and I went to a singles party. For the most part he was his usual drunk self, he was hitting on every guy there. About half-way through the night he started hitting on me. When I questioned him about his actions he said he was just joking, and trying to cheer me up. I felt a little weird out, but he's done similar things to other people so I wrote it off. At some point during the drive home he started crying, so of course I asked him what was wrong. Our conversation went something like this
John:"I'm so sorry"
Me:"for What"
John"He was just so bad for you"
Me: "Who was?"
John: "Thomas*mumbled gibberish*..that's why I did what I did"
Me:....*Considering the potential weight of that statement.

I've realized this is turning quite long, so I shall do my best to be brief from here on out.

As I've thought more, and more about the interactions between Thomas, John, and I. I've come to the conclusion that John was responsible for a large amount of the distrust, and paranoia between Thomas, and I. John was the one who planted the idea the Thomas had cheated on me in my head. John was the one who kept telling me not to pick up on any of Thomas' calls after we broke up. I'd also heard a rumor about John years ago that he was a home wrecker, I'd only heard this once, and easily dismissed it at the time. I've also been talking to some people in John's past most of them mirror the sentiment that he's a psycho, and not to trust him.

I'm not sure what to do. I feel so hurt right now.What if my best friend sabotaged my relationship. I'm not sure what kind of conversations John, and Thomas have had. I never found out what happened to make Thomas change like that. I've been tempted to call Thomas, but It's been months since the last time he tried to call me, and I'm not sure how he'd react to me calling him. Even if he was okay with the idea of speaking to me how in the fuck do I start the conversation about John? If I try to start that conversation, I'd bet money on him thinking I'm trying to get back together with him. Any advice, or comments on my situation would be greatly appreciated.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2014-07-13 19:09 ID:72Bd8osy

> he was hitting on every guy there. About half-way through the night he started hitting on me

Your friend John is gay? Best I can understand of this situation is that John is jealous of you because he likes Thomas.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2014-07-27 08:21 ID:1KvryomP

Perhaps the problem is that all of you like Dick.

4 Name: Otakun : 2014-07-29 11:16 ID:VFm8H65G

It's been a while since I've been on these boards, about 6 years now. Here's what I've got to say: Trust your heart. If you want to give Thomas another chance do it, but do it only for your own sake of having no regrets. If you can live without Thomas happily then move on. However, John doesn't sound like he's really that good of a friend. You're better off without him. Good luck

5 Name: saeg : 2014-07-29 20:27 ID:Heaven

Welcome back!

6 Name: gorrillaconvention : 2014-08-03 20:57 ID:Heaven

i dont care who says theyre hot or they arent id still put it in all their holes

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