( LΦ`) hello kids!
(EΝE)
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(EΝE)
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i@LΦ`jMaybe on a dime.
(EΝE) We don't have that kind of money, Grandpa.
i@LΦ`jI definitely thrust vectored, though.
(EΝE) Still. no good.
i@LΦ`j 110GET
(EΝE) Grandpa! Why don't you just die.
i@LΦ`jJunior! That's not like you.
i@LΦ`jYou forgot the question mark on your question!
i@LΦ`jI can't hear well.
(EΝE) Can you hear me now?
i@LΦ`jNot at all, Junior.
(EΝE) Maybe you take DQN's ears too.
i@LΦ`j Maybe you go back to school and stop bothering me.
(EΝE) I graduated, then decided life sucks (just like what you decided) and I retired shortly thereafter! Now I'm just leeching off of you and my parents.
(EΝE) Grandpa, what's your favorite anime?
(@LΦ`jHold on, there's something stuck in my cheek.
( LΦ`) @
( LΦ`) That's better. Junior, have you been feeding me unko in my sleep again?
(EΝE) Hahaha, sucker!!
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( LΦ`) Too tired to. ZZzzzzz
(EΝE) Grandpa, wake up! The russians are coming!
( LΦ`) It's fine. The russians are russian your ass.
( EΝE) Your not making sense...
( LΦ`) I am too!
(EΝE ) ...
( LΦ`) Well,
ΝE )
( LΦ`) Hey
E )
( 'Φ' )
( LΦ`) your ass, my ass? no difference!
(EΝE) Grandpa, do you think we've been copy/pasted more then any 1000 thread by oppai oppai?
(EΝE) Grandpa! How come your hands look all disgusting and full of black spots?
( LΦ`) oppai is a one man thread sonny.
(EΝE) I want to play "Oppai Oppai" too, Grandpa!
( LΦ`) Maybe when you're older.
(EΝE) Grandpa, this is DJ Junior on WDQN hosting the zany, new morning show - Junior and the Zoo Krew! We're a wacky, wild bunch who plays the "boing" sound effect to imitate a penis suddenly going erect, and sometimes we make prank calls... ON THE AIR! Aren't we the freshest and funniest act on terrestrial radio today!?
( LΦ`) I'm retired. I don't listen to the radio driving to work anymore.
( LΦ`) But I still drive to work. Ah, old times... sigh
(EΝE) Grandpa, how many wrinkles do you have on your body? I have, like, none!
( LΦ`) Only one? Heck, I have millions of them, boy. Wanna take a look them?
(EΝE) (.Ν:) (;Ν;) N-no thanks
(EΝE) Grandpa, why is emo sexy?
( LΦ`) It isn't!
(EΝE) Grandpa, does maturity grow as you age?
( LΦ`) Age and maturity are a state of mind, Junior. You're only as old as you feel.
( LΦ`) Mind you, I feel like I'm a flapper girls from 1920's Chicago doing the Lindey Hop in a Speakeasy with gangsters, but that's my business.
(EΝE) Grandpa, why do they say "don't count your chickens before they hatch" when they sell eggs by the dozen? I mean, it's kind of hard not to count if they tell you right on the package the number of them.
( LΦ`) So you can die of bird flu.
(EΝE) Grandpa, who has the most delicious boobs in anime?
( LΦ`) There are no boobs in anime, junior, let alone any of the delicious variety. In fact, anime is all about bewbs.
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@@@@@@ όi LΦM jό For me, it's Katsuragi Misato-chan!
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( LΦ`) Though a Misumaru Yurika-san is fine too.
(EΝE) Grandpa, is Junior my real name?
( LΦ`) Hohoho! My dear boy, nobody's ever told you your real name?
(EΝE) What?! No, Grandpa, what is it?
( LΦ`) Sockpuppet W. Gangare, Junior!
( E[Ej My last name is Igewal, though.
( LΦ`) ...
( E[Ej ...I'll be going now.
(EΝE) Grandpa, I want to become a professional Go player. I want to play a game against you in the hopes your fighting spirit will inspire me!
( LΦ`) No. Grow a REAL man's nose and play mahjong.
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@iEΝE) I smell!
(EΝE) Grandpa, do you work for the Siberian Railway?
( LΦ`) Why do you waste my time asking such stupid questions? I don't have much longer to live!
(EΝE) Grandpa, can I have your moustache when you die?
( LΦ`) I'm donating my mustache to the Children's Aid Society when I die. However, you can have my pubes, if you'd like!
(EΝE) Grandpa, why do you look at other women when you have me?
( LΦ`) You're not a woman, you just have vagina envy.
( XΦX) OH SHIT! HEART ATTACK! STROKE! DIEEEEEEEEEES!
GRANDPA IS OVER.
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!! ( LΦ`) I've been replaced! Call me..Grandpa.
(EΝE) Uh, okay.
(EΝE) Grandpa, have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? It's something I ask of all my prey. I just like the sound of it.
( LΦ`) No, but I did meet the devil at the crossroads. He wanted to know I wanted to buy a chocolate bar for charity. I told him to fuck off.
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@@@@|~PP|@@@@ @Bless you and live well, Grandpa.
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( LΦ`) Hell-a loo yah.
(EΝE) Granpa, where do missing socks go?
( LΦ`)
The Bureau of Missing Socks is seeking young, attractive, potential stars for a series of Internet videos and a possible part in director Joel M. Reed's next feature film. Fame, fortune and a new career are possibilities - International exposure a reality. There will be pay and no fees of any kind are involved. Please email your picture to admin@funbureau.com. If you're under 18 submission must be accompanied by a note from parent or guardian. All entries will be published.
(EΝE) Grandpa, can I sign up?
>attractive, potential stars
( LΦ`)
(EΝE) Yes?
>under 18 submission must be accompanied by a note from parent or guardian
( LΦ`)
(EΝE) Are you saying you won't give permission?!
( LΦ`)
(EΝE) Please...?
( LΦ`) No. Now go and play your cat-guitar.
(EAE)
(EΝE) Please...?
( LΦ`) No, no, and I said no, so no. Do this anymore and I'm going to have to teach you a painful lesson.
( EΦE) I'll sponsor you, Junior.
(EΝE) But, you aren't my legal guardian. You aren't even a human.
( LΦ`) But junior, you are not even legal.
(EDE) SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU CLONE CRAP WAS ANYONE TALKING TO YOU GET THE FUCK OUT
( LΦ`) Go back to your own damn thread, Emojunior.
(EΝE) Grandpa, who's the deaf, dumb, and blind kid that plays a mean pinball?
( LΦ`) Your mom.
Ώ( LΦ`)Ώ Oh! What's up now, bitch?!
( EΦE) When did this become Jerry Springer?
(EΝE) Grandpa, I tried to fix the Wikipedia page, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manga, but they blocked my IP range due to some other asshole. Are you a big fan of 'Buttsecks?'
( LΦiBE_Ej I'll fix it in a bit, Junior. I'm busy right now.
(EΝE) I'll just sit here and watch until you can fix it.
iBE_Ej ......
( LΦ`) Ok what was that again?
(EΝE) Oh, nevermind.
(EΝE) Grandpa, what was the internet like before MySpace was invented?