What makes me want to slit your throat so badly?
That case was a landslide victory for the Jews, and it looks like we have bigger problems than berserked-out lumberjacks.
What happened when the media covered the case of the 1000 rabid lumberjacks?
That is because you used the wrong hole.
Why is my cock brown?
I'm tellin' ya man, REPTOIDS! R-E-P-T-O-I-D-S-!
Oh my god, who slaughtered my dog?!
Apply some essence of the knowledge on your forehead.
why does thinking cause me so many headaches?
It is like 100 gallons of ball sweat.
How is life on Jupiter?
It's so creamy.
I wonder what childbirth is like?
Just give up, it wasn't meant to be.
I try to pull out all the hair from my armpits, but they keep growing back. What do I do?
jait
Why don't you ever make any sense?
Wear it and girls will peep at you!
what are those funny pants with no zipper or buttons for?
Negative number IQ.
Hey, got spare coin for a helpless bum?
I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly. C´mon!
why do you drool when you look at me?
The opposite of TANASINN
I want to buy a soda... But for some reason it's not accepting my dollar bill...
Your awareness slowly fades, and soon after you feel as though you've been ravaged by a thousand angry eels. Then you get pie.
I think I had an out of body experience, but just to be sure, what is one usually like?
Don't worry about it, it should just wash out.
I just got jizz on my pillow case, what should I do? :(
Ramen is for bitches, real men eat beef rice.
I'm hungry, but I want to look like a man.
Oh god. That is just sick.
Did you hear about the Yakin Byoutou cosplayers?
American women learn Sumo wrestling.
Did you hear? They finally found a way to make Americans feel good about being morbidly obese!
Only sometimes, and even then, only sparingly.
When a tourist goes to Japan, what are the odds of meeting a woman that looks like Miyabi Hayama?
The second shittiest animu.
What is your opinion of Clannad?
My little sister's chest meat.
What is the flattest surface on earth?
Dogs will bark at your presence.
What do I do to see Lara Croft naked?
Sounds like she should have eared on the side of caution.
Did you hear the story about the girl who put her ear against the train track to hear the train?
Finishing a race in 4,129,070,619th place.
How bad did the losingest loser lose the race, anyway?
Knowing French in a room full of Spanish speakers.
Is Annie Hall a good film?
Please reread what you just asked.
omg so hoe do i maek suar tat cat is phone??????
Only when speaking to a police officer.
Have you ever been in love?
You can use my gluestick.
Help! The world is infested with construction paper zombies!
In fact, I haven't eaten one of those in a month.
I was told that strawberry Pocky is the most addictive food on earth. Is that true?
It is like falling anus first on an erect horse penis.
Why do I keep getting an uncomfortable wet feeling when I stand in front of porcelain bowls?
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
Oh man, I just heard this great song on the radio about a horse with no name. Isn't discovering new things great?
Actually, it was The Four Lads.
Hey, were you aware that those fuckin' TMBG posers bit "Istanbul" from The Four Tops?
Because both of >>38's sentences are about 40-50 year old music.
What was it about this thread that made you want to bump it?
Yes, I know, it was actually released in 1972
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvoD8TiW5OQ&feature=related
What being an otaku 20 years ago was like.
What's Otaku No Video about?
I say we come up with a plan to assassinate him.
Obama? What about him?
We need more Jell-O and cucumbers.
anything you want me to pick up at the store, dearie?
well of course there were three, what did you expect?
Why were there three?
stop that
its silly
Yo dawg, do you like cars?
I don't know, I know it's made with soya stuff, but I don't actually know what else.
Man, soylent green is really good. I wonder what its made of?
Just keep doing what you're doing. More ladies in chainmail bikinis couldn't hurt though.
What happened to my pet lizard once it got out of its cage?
It is like watching every episode of Gatchaman without taking a break.
I'm thinking of trying ecstasy. What should I expect?
Technically, you can, but you better stock up on adult diapers first.
What should I do with this poteto that I'm slicing into Franch Frais?
Silly dokyuun, there are no girls there!
HAY ANY HAWT CHIKS WANNA HOOK UP 19/M/USA
It was only available as a b-side on the blue-vinyl 7" of The Blues Are Still Blue.
Did Belle & Sebastian really record the Internationale?
They already have that in the UK.
I went up the road to New York the other day, and i drove around a weird circle road thing, god it was confusing! I asked a policeman and he said it was a "roundabout"! Have you ever heard of anything so crazy in your life?
It's where you break half a custard cream and half a chocolate bourbon biscuit, and press the creamy halves together. It works with oreos too.
Hmm, you're a pretty sexy plug. What are your specs?
I coulda swore I told you, they're ex-humans who lost their humanity in some freak accident and ended up with that particular deviation.
Zombies?! You damn scientists didn't tell us that they're motherfucking zombies?!
THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!
You know, we were all pretty drunk and phone and me just saw her and... Hey it's not personal, mate! There's no need to break up with her!
Interesting, considering your love for big boobs. Oh, the phone's ringing... Yes? Hello? Yeah, Freud here!
Hi, this is Jung, is Siggy there?
It was simply a terrible set up, it's not like you could have done any better.
Do you hate me for cumming too fast?
Oh lord, you're such a knobhead... Of course not!
Is Arudou Debito a genius?
Try some Xanax and some Zoloft, it really helped my friend.
How did you know I was such a nerd?
The placebo effect on steroids
What is the most slippery slippery slope argument?
The greatest invention before sliced bread.
How would you describe a bread knife?
He's been posting replies to himself all that time, using lines from Morrissey's We'll Let You Know
Who is that strange dude over there, and why does he look so mad?
It's like jazz run over by a japanese steam-powered steamroller through a broken amp.
What are Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra like live?
That's what I meant by "It's been done"
Hey guys! I'm going to fansub the newest movie!
Like being hit by an attractive lady.
What's it like to be hit by an attractive lady?
It's an emergency, there's no more "Wait and see"
I wonder what happens when we run out of mittens... let's find out?
I was thinking of an image macro and trying not to laugh.
Why were you giggling at your husband's funeral?
Nah, I'm not really into pokemon.
Have you tried the new Ubuntu release?
I don't mind when you come round, though if it's the weekend I just might be in bed
Hey man, do you like Ubuntu?
Aw man, i totally hate it. Seriously.
You know when you're making out on your sofa with your girl, and the phone rings and it's her dad, but she then tells you her dad died a long time ago?
Yeah, he used to be such a sweet boy, holding so tightly to his daddy's hand
>>75, I heard you knew Hillary Clinton when she was a kid.
No you can't, the cat just gets stuck, and it never works quite right after that.
Can't we just suck it out?
Oh my God. Its full of stars
Look, I cut a gash in my belly with a scalpel, is this awesome y/n?
Give in to the pressure, the cop's gonna get you
Should I prove EVO IS NO.1 on the public road?
Nitromethane plus Nitrous Oxide
How the fuck can the Flash make clothes out of thin air?
its pronounced E-JIT
My Scottish friend keeps calling me "idjit" in messages to me, what does it mean? I think it's an insult
The more you ignore him, the closer he'll get
Am I wasting my time with him? Look at him, he's fallen asleep with his head on the bar. Should I just forget him and find someone else?
Yeah, let me in please
Hello this is the tanasinn chamber. If you enter you must leave your shadow with us, and you may never return to the outside world. Would you like to enter?
I will take 5 of those please.
Even though they are cheaper in bulk, they remain quite horrible... Are you sure you want to order a bonsai kitten, sir?
You must construct additional pylons.
How do I make my penis bigger?
King Arthur.
Who was the British geologist that discovered a very unique rock formation?
Because she ate all the donuts at the Krispy Kreme.
Why did Diana really die?
Meat, and lots of it. That is the only way.
How could I help Morrissey be a more commercially successful recording artist?
At least think about the implications!
I have the ability to make DQN the world's most popular website, therefore I should, right?
It's the only reason why I bother getting up at all in the morning.
Am I the only one who thinks sleep is the best thing in the world?
Try relaxing your anus.
Is there anything I can do to improve my dance style?
Hot peppers, onions, tomatoes, and light mayo.
I'm interested in a great sub, but one that sets me apart as a ladies man - any suggestions?
Listen to them - they are more experienced.
The voices in my head keep telling me to kill myself! What should I do?
Yes, with the possible exception of chocolate pudding.
Is it weird for my food to be the same color in my feces?
Two boxes of Cheerios and a carton of milk.
So let me get this straight - you took on the entire North Korean army and won, while armed only with WHAT?
Because it's winter.
Why is it only 65 degrees and all the plants are green?
I want to take it easy.
Why did you favourite this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKrTGBq74wg&feature=related
She's a good girl, ain't she?
Have you seen that lead singer of Tokio Hotel?
I was thinking about something from my childhood.
Holy fuck, your paintings are disturbing, to say the least. What inspires you?
Yeah, one's viagra, and one's like sudafed or something, you leave them in an envelope somewhere for someone to pick them up lol
Why did you scream and run away when you saw that church guy?
Because he is a panda.