ITT the previous poster is a panda [PART II] (246)

1 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8501 18:49

>>/999 is a panda!

24 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8541 23:43

>>23 ironically wears a t-shirt that says "I am not a Panda"

25 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8542 04:27

>>24 trolls doctors about "black-eye" on his fur

26 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8542 22:32

>>25 is the bear equivalent of a yin-yang symbol.

27 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8543 08:06

>>26 has an excellent sense of smell, but only really uses it to seek and destroy bamboo, which given that bamboo has a distinctive scent, is kind of a waste.

28 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8543 09:02

>>27 is intimately familiar with the distinctive scent of bamboo, having been stuffing his fat face with it at every available opportunity his whole life.

29 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8544 14:56

>>28's face is so round that people say, "YOU ARE AS FAT AS A PANDA!!!!" to him. He only gives them "how naive you are" smile in return.

30 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8544 15:37

>>29 tries to convince people on the internet that he is not a panda, with limited success.

31 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8554 00:18

If I had to describe >>30 in one word, it would be "panda".

32 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8556 08:09

>>31 has been spotted sitting sad, unable to access pornographic anime site.

33 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8556 15:53

As a child, >>32 wished upon a star to become a panda. His wish came true.

34 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8556 16:07

>>33 never gets confused. Only bamboozled.

35 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8556 17:38

>>34 is required to use the separate but equal panda facilities.

36 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8556 20:12

>>35 is indistinguishable from a panda in every possible way.

37 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8576 13:10

38 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8576 16:30

Ugh, >>37 is just such a complete and utter panda.

39 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8594 20:15

>>38 is quite a panda already, but is always looking for ways to become even more of a panda.

40 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8797 21:35

From a certain angle, >>39 looks like a panda.

41 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8798 19:02

Behold, we are in the presence of >>40, better known as Ramplebottom III, king of the pandas! Gaze upon his radiant monochrome visage and weep!

42 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8801 14:42

I can't officially call >>41 a panda because if >>41 doesn't identify as a panda, I can be punished by a $10,000 fine.

43 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8801 21:31

>>42 is a cutesy-wootsy little panda-wanda!

44 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8802 04:05

>>43 used to be a small panda. But then he grew up into a full panda.

45 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8807 10:56

>>44, according to the internet, makes noises including bleating, honking, barking, howling, and whining.

46 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8809 05:24

>>45 was the only panda in the theater for the afternoon showing of Blade Runner 2049.

47 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8809 06:46

>>46 has trouble reproducing.

48 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8809 20:30

>>47 was the founder of Bamboo, a high quality quarterly magazine created by and for bamboo enthusiasts.

49 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8809 21:46

>>48 founded the low-brow but much more successful High Bamboo Times, and used his fortune to buy lots of bamboo.

50 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8902 09:40

>>49
Is a popufur commissioner who paid off a lot of beginner artists' Wacom Bamboo tablets. The cartoon portraits thus commissioned bear an uncanny resemblance to the photos.

51 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8902 16:06

>>50 cannot even imagine what it must be like not to be a panda.

52 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8902 19:22

>>51 looks great on Instagram but is kind of off-putting up close, with smaller eyes than you realized and the fat face from a lifestyle of lying around.

53 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8966 13:35

>>52 is a Chesty Panda Masturbating Her Hairy Pussy

54 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8986 10:26

>>53 is a Busty Panda Fingering Her Cooshie

55 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8986 16:13

>>54 is a Pandaey Panda Pandaing Her Panda.

56 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8987 18:01

>>55 is a boobily breasting panda titting down the stairs.

57 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9466 10:33

>>56's sadness very big

58 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9466 10:36

>>57 has been formally diagnosed with Panda Personality Disorder.

59 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9466 15:10

>>58 was born a grizzly, but thanks to greasepaint is now a proud transpanda.

60 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9467 09:35

>>59 is a pansexual dad.

61 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9467 11:22

>>60 is a loaf of bread in a Japanese convenience store.

62 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9467 14:27

>>61 came back to life six hours ago.

63 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9467 16:48

I'm not even kidding here, I think >>62 might actually be a panda.

64 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9468 05:24

>>63 used to be a male panda but is now a female panda.

65 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9469 23:12

>>64 is a prime example of what we in the scientific community refer to as "a panda".

66 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9470 05:13

>>65 has been observed by researchers since he was born.

67 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9470 05:48

>>66 narrowly escaped falling victim to a top secret order identifying all pandas as traitors to the Galactic Republic and, therefore, subject to summary execution by the Grand Army of the Republic.

68 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9470 18:03

>>67 is a fucking worthless piece of shit, even by panda standards.

69 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9470 22:51

>>68 is not a very nice panda, unlike me.

70 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9470 23:03

Did you know? >>69 is, in fact, a panda.

71 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9471 03:30

>>70 stfu, pandafag.

72 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9471 10:36

I can't believe we let blatant pandas like >>71 post on DQN these days.

73 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9471 15:49

>>72 is a black and white supremacist Pandanon.

74 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9471 23:24

Psst, don't tell anyone I told you this, but >>73 is secretly a panda!

75 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9472 04:42

Figure 5. On the left, an image of >>74. On the right, the same image with our universal adversarial single bit flip applied, causing the image to be classified with 99% confidence as a cucumber by all thirty-nine selected classifiers. Of course, >>74 is actually a panda.

76 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9472 10:09

Now look, it's really not my place to be dictating who is and isn't a panda, but >>75 certainly isn't not a panda, that's all I'm saying.

77 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9473 06:07

I don't believe >>76 is a panda, but statistically speaking, some of my beliefs are erroneous, especially the ones I post anonymously online.

78 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9473 06:44

A collision between >>77 and a Pan Am Boeing 747 in Tenerife killed 583 people, the deadliest accident in aviation history. With the unmatched constitution of a morbidly obese panda, he survived the accident and then attempted to lose weight, but failed.

79 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9473 21:13

>>78 piasn daa !

80 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9473 22:59

>>79=🐼

81 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9473 23:30

>>80 is a panda with a bandana.

82 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9474 12:50

>>81 has terminal pandaitis.

83 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9496 06:15

>>82 can be ridden by baby zombie variants [Bedrock and PlayStation 4 editions only].

84 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9496 16:45

>>83 is probably aware, on some level, that she's a panda, but doesn't realise just how much of a panda she truly is.

85 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9496 23:04

>>84 drives a Pandaston Martin DB6.

86 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9497 06:00

>>85 I'm sorry, but you've got to start facing the reality of being a panda. Stop this immature nonsense.

87 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9497 10:32

>>86
Hey everyone, get a load of this panda!

88 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9497 18:24

I've seen plenty of pandas and panda wannabees in my lifetime, but holy shit, >>87 is one hell of a panda!

89 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9497 20:23

>>88 regularly pays homage to a deceased and disgraced fascist leader who believed in the innate racial superiority of pandas.

90 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9497 22:07

>>89 is a strange and highly disturbing mythological creature, possessing the head of a panda, and the body of a panda.

91 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9498 08:32

>>90
Sounds like something a panda would say

92 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9498 13:12

What does it mean to be a panda? Let us ask our resident expert, >>91, for his opinion on the matter.

93 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9505 07:46

>>92 pretends to not be a panda on anonymous forums to fit in

94 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9505 08:46

>>93 is a real animal in bed! Specifically, a panda.

95 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9507 00:43

>>94 is rocking Outland-ish livery in the homeland of his ancestors, at least till he's done with these stupid dailies.

96 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9509 23:16

>>95 keeps causing my panda alarm to go off.

97 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9510 03:30

If this post ends in a 7, >>96 is a panda.

98 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9510 17:30

As t tends to infinity, >>97 asymptotically approaches pandahood.

99 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 15:40

During a tarot card reading, >>98 drew the Twelve of Bamboo Shoots, indicating that she is a panda or will become a panda in the immediate future.

100 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 16:14

This 100get proves my dominance over >>99. Thus, >>99 is now a panda.

101 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 18:09

>>100 is by nature a solitary person, for most of his time is spent avoiding direct contact with others of his own kind. But at crucial stages in >>100's life, he, just like all solitary mammals, is forced to spend time with others. In spring >>100 must seek out a female in order to mate. And in autumn the female gives birth to a single cub which will be her constant companion for the next 18 months or more.

>>100 generally avoids contacting others of his kind in the wild. In their dense habitat their coats help make them conspicuous to each other, preventing them from surprising themselves by approaching too close to each other.

>>100 signifies aggression by lowering his head and staring at his opponents. To signal submissiveness, >>100 will put his head between his front legs, often hiding his eye-patches with his paws. Interestingly, this position is adopted by his partners during mating season, and also by >>100 when being harassed by humans - particularly vets with anaesthetic darts. At close range, >>100 signifies aggression by swiping a paw, or by letting out a low-pitched growl or bark that will send opponents scampering up the nearest tree.

102 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 21:08

>>101's a panda or something i guess

103 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 23:27

>>102 wishes he could invert the colors of his fur, like a panda superhero.

104 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9520 02:50

>>103 refuses to have sex without some serious pandering to

105 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9520 07:00

>>104 had no sexual outlet until discovering erotic roleplay in World of Warcraft on the momentous day of September 25, 2012.

106 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9520 11:57

>>105 pppppppppppppppppppppppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnddddddddddddddddddddddddddddaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

107 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9520 18:33

>>106 is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable panda.

108 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9520 22:55

>>107 lived a normal life with their fellow humans until one day they crossed the edge of a bamboo forest in northern china and found a whole society of pandas. While distracted by some advanced panda technology they where spotted by a panda and soon took a dart to the neck. When they awoke they were back with their family in the forest, but no-one believed his tale about panda world except for a plucky young boy named bamboo gargler the panda.

109 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9521 12:06

>>108's favourite suit in mahjong is the souzu set of tiles

110 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9522 03:48

>>109 can't help but to remain a panda after the wizard cursed him

111 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9522 08:13

>>110 calls others pandas because they are insecure about being a panda

112 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9522 20:45

>>111 nice trips, panda.

113 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9524 00:00

>>112 is not only a panda, but a fren

114 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9524 01:11

>>113 got broads in atlanta

115 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9529 19:08

>>114 is a star of Ready Panda One

116 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9530 18:04

>>115 has forty white teeth, a bumpy black nose, and is covered in fur from his head to his toes

117 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9530 21:08

>>116 is the host of panda eating show (mukbang)

118 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 07:06

>>117 is known as the bamboo bastard

119 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 16:50

>>118 is a Quinling panda

120 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 16:53

>>119 is a dyslexic panda

121 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 17:29

>>120 is known as "the fucking panda bastard"

122 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 20:04

>>121 is, infamously, not known as "the panda-fucking bastard"

123 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9531 21:27

There are 1120 pandas on this website and >>122 STILL can't get laid

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