Question for you all, but it requires a bit of backstory.
I never started dating at all and was nothing more than an antisocial geek until when I was 16, I started playing the guitar and singing in front of people in the church, later I ended up leading a band in the same setting. There did not seem to be a period of time longer than 2 months when I was not dating someone. This continued unit I was about half way though college and my studies and work kept me from having time to do this anymore. In college I then dated a girl for two years (who was a bit of an otaku, actually) and then realized that she wasnt the one, so I had to break up with her.
Now, about a yearand a half after that, I am 23, and it seems that nothing seems to happen anymore. I still like playing guitar, and love to sing, but am reluctant to go back to performance in front of others because I do not want to get female attention for that reason alone, and I also don't trust that I would not be playing for the wrong reasons.
I guess it kinda would make me feel cheap, I want someone to like me for who I am because later down the road, I might not want to play anymore, and at that point, what they were attracted to might not be there anymore.
I guess my question after all of this is:
Am I sane in my decision to not play in an effort to find a genuine relationship? Or is "bait and switch" just acceptable and necessary?
Also, what the hell is it with girls and music?
>>3-4
True.
I seem to observe the same thing. I have this friend who is also a musician and has his own band. When you are on stage, attention is drawn to you as a person with talent, guts and fame (although the latter may not necessarily be true). I don't know, yet, if he is having problems with that. But, I do know that he has friends almost everywhere in town, of all the cultural and social types you can think of. I sometimes envy him, but I would freak out to just think of handling with all the people out there. I'm amazed he even goes to a music faculty and high school the same days. He comes to school so dead tired. °_°
I want to get in a band, but there's noone around where I live that I could jam with, let alone want to play the same style of music that I want to play. Last band I was with, all the guys had Gf's except for one guy. Then the friend of the band had 2 gf's -_- but he fixed that into having one gf later.
It's also about the confidence too I think. Getting up in front of people and play music or sing do take a lot of confidence. Girls are also attracted to confidence too.
>>6
You mean noone else will dress up like a women and play bishounen with you?