[Part II] The previous poster is a nerd [otaku] (999)

1 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6132 12:09

>> Has a pocket protector made of gold

850 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 05:51

>>849 corrects people that say "GNU/Linux" by saying "GNU, Linux, X, and many other essential components are part of a modern OS, and Linux as a collective term works well enough."

851 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 08:24

>>850 can name which licenses all of those software packages use, and recite the licenses from memory.

852 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 08:56

>>851 spends Christmas on DQN.

853 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 12:02

>>852 spends Christmas on DQN.

854 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 12:13

>>853 promised himself to spend Christmas alone, but went to DQN nonetheless.

855 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 12:14

>>854 was there to welcome >>853.

856 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 14:56

>>855 Goes to costume parties as Error from Zelda 2.

857 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 18:21

>>856 goes to parties cosplaying as Sailor Moon--whether they are costume parties or not.

858 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6690 23:03

>>856 goes to parties cosplaying as Sailor Moon, without shaving his Unix beard before.

859 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6692 12:54

>>858 Invented a beard that can change its own shape with robotic hair.

860 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6695 20:11

>>859 Is a pocharu otaku with a 150 KG realdoll.

861 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6697 08:54

>>860 believes that he's "VIP quality" just because he knows where the secret area of VIP quality is.

862 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6698 00:06

>>861 relies on his own judgement to decide whenever something is VIP quality or not.

863 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6698 15:07

>>862 is always VIP QUALITY.

864 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6699 13:57

>>863 wrote Unix drivers for >>858's beard, but ran into trouble securing the naming rights for his invention.

865 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6700 01:31

>>864 Played every NES game with the Power Glove to see what doesn't work. After he did that, he got his Famicom to NES adapter to see what would happen with Famicom exclusive games.

866 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6700 16:18

>>865 hacked >>858's computers to take over his robotic Unix beard and control it with >>864's NES Power Glove.

867 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6700 18:20

>>866 Used an LJN Rollin' Rocker to control a Linux beard, the result was that the Unix beard shaved itself.

868 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6705 17:46

>>867 has been declared a hostile foreign power by the CIA after building a working, armed replica of the tank from Master Blaster.

869 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 01:42

>>868 Has a Gibson Flying V guitar that actually flies, up to mach 2.2 at an altitude of 90,000 feet.

870 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 01:53

>>869 killed himself, believing he would go to Gensokyo and meet an unnamed book-reading youkai.

871 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 02:03

>>870 is a cyborg, but that's OK.

872 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 14:29

>>871 Attached a microchip to his brain so he can control machinery without even pushing a button or giving a voice command.

873 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 16:41

>>872 hacked the microchip in >>871's brain and took over his body remotely, and made him dance down the street naked except for a top hat singing "Hello My Baby" until the cops showed up to drag him away.

874 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 16:57

875 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 19:57

>>874 is John C. Brandstetter, longing to recapture the good old days of *zark*ing FEKA goons.

876 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 20:54

>>875 can't really believe in himself. But he'd really love to.

877 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6706 23:56

>>876 Loved Top Gun and After Burner games so much, he built a jet that looks like an F-14 Tomcat. However, his look alike is capable of vertical takeoff, stealth, and reaches speeds of Mach 3.5.

878 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6707 16:47

>>877 has built a device which predicts coming changes in the Japanese economy by sniffing used schoolgirl panties with a robotic nose.

879 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6707 17:04

When an anime company releases something that >>878 doesn't like, he hacks the Nikkei to lower the stock price to 1 yen per share.

880 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6708 21:56

>>879 hacked the big wall displays at the New York Stock Exchange to say "AVAST YE SWABS, BANK OF AMERICA IS GOING UNDER," causing the 2007 sub-prime mortgage crisis and subsequent economic dislocations.

881 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6709 08:51

>>880 contents himself with hacking airport information systems so that all flights with non-prime numbers will show on all screens as being cancelled.

882 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6709 13:32

>>881 is a cartography nerd, and currently accepting corrections for his 1:1024 scale map of the United States.

883 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6709 14:22

>>882 Lives in a castle that is shaped by a skull

884 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6709 18:17

>>883 was so inspired by >>876's jet airplane that he built one that does all the same things and also transforms into a giant robot.

885 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6710 15:00

>>884 Makes fan games that feature NES characters, however, the levels they are in are insanely difficult.

886 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6714 14:34

>>885 Createst the worlds angriest bird

887 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6714 16:34

>>887 complains to every web-sight that didn't black out today.

888 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6714 18:22

>>887 wishes he could have these sweet trips.

889 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6715 15:13

>>888 can remember the first 400 digits of pi, but not the location of the g-spot.

890 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6716 02:41

>>889 Built a copy of the GoldenEye laser. When it fires, another one of his inventions causes every TV station to say "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAHZOR!"

891 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6721 11:41

>>890 is so afraid of social contact that he avoids playing online games.

892 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6737 01:44

>>891 Is a Real Drive otaku that has dinner with his darling waifu, and it is an enormous McDonald's burger.

893 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6737 18:19

>>892 is an enormous geek about language games and puns, and is deliberately trying to confuse us about whether >>891's waifu is a McDonald's burger.

894 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6737 18:24

>>893 is an enormous geek about programming languages and puns, and will deliberately try to confuse computer science freshmen about whether main() is a program's entry or a universal function designed to check pressure of the user's residential plumbing before proceeding.

895 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6738 01:20

>>894 Calls Lina Inverse his waifu.
He does this: http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/events/dinner-with-waifu-otaku-dates

And he brings 30 kilograms of food to the table.

896 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6738 03:31

>>895 contributes financially to the Modern Cheezburger Society of Internet Culture.

897 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6740 00:35

>>896 Hates a certain youtube game reviewer, so he created "Locomotive Breath Gamer Reviews" to make fun of him.

898 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6740 00:38

>>897 knows about the hidden game on YouTube video pages that isn't the snake game.

899 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6740 00:41

>>898 is able to recite every game over speech from every Metal Gear game.

900 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6740 02:20

>>899 found the second /dqn/ on 4-ch all by himself.

901 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6751 00:55

>>900 refused to seize the 900GET because he was afraid it might make us think he was even more nerdy than he actually is.

902 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6752 12:27

>>901 makes his own chatbots, in order to feel less lonely without actually having to converse with other humans.

903 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6753 02:53

>>902 makes chatbots that talk to one another, so that he won't have to.

904 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6753 05:32

>>903 masturbates to Microsoft Comic Chat comics of bots talking with one another because finding doujins to wank off to is something he doesn't wish to get involved in.

905 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6753 19:11

Whenever there is a power outage, >>904 plays Hunt the Wumpus by candlelight using punch cards.

906 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6754 00:30

>>905 knows how to outrun the monster in SkiFree.

907 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6756 18:41

>>906 Invented the world's silliest walk.

908 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6756 21:15

>>907 can quote any Monty Python sketch verbatim.

909 Name: !ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-6757 00:38

>>908 is trying his best to organize Massive Multiplayer Offline game of DnD.

910 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6757 00:57

>>909 LARPs while cosplaying.

911 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6757 15:56

>>910 cosplays while writing Visual Novel modes for Emacs.

912 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6757 19:11

>>911 doesn't suffer from Asperger's Syndrome--he enjoys every moment of it.

913 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6757 22:05

>>912 has written a 700,000 word essay on his interpretation of the Touhou canon. Four of its readers promptly erected a shrine to him; the other one deconstructed his arguments in great detail on Nico Nico Douga.

914 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6758 05:03

>>913 knew everything about every MLP incarnation by heart long before FiM and bronies was a thing.

915 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6758 10:19

>>914 cosplays while writing Visual Novel modes for Emacs under an anaglyphic virtual terminal using the power glove and 3D glasses.

916 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6758 10:30

>>915 Likes to put SOI sauce on his Asian food.

917 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6758 13:48

>>916 has sold his stove to buy more RAM. He cooks his meals on his CPU heatsink instead.

918 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6759 00:42

>>917 gigglesnorts when he says "RAM."

919 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6759 03:44

>>918 was afraid that people would realize that he was a nerd, were he to use the correct word, "snork".

920 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6759 21:03

>>919 loved the old "Snorks" cartoons when he was a kid, almost as much as the "Smurfs." And still writes elaborate fanfiction about both, thirty years later.

921 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6760 16:42

>>920 Makes new equipment for the Atari 2600.

922 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6760 16:53

>>921 built a Babbage Engine in a cave, using a box of scraps.

923 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6762 02:26

>>922 Built a scale model of Arkham City that was so precise, the game's programmers were jealous of it.

924 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6764 00:28

>>923 Saw the movie "Human Centipede" and the created a Human Millipede.

925 Name: !ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-6764 11:27

>>924 made 2/3 of posts in The previous poster is a computer (ttp://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1330541296).

926 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6764 14:11

>>925 prints his own Halloween costume parts on his RepRap.

927 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6765 19:08

>>926 Uses a month-old laptop computer as a paperweight.

928 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6765 21:23

>>927 asked >>926 to make him a custom Halloween costume. He wants to go to costume parties as the Intel BX chipset.

929 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6765 21:37

>>928's idea of fun is discovering and abusing bugs in game physics engines, then uploading footage of them to YouTube.

930 Name: !ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-6765 23:32

>>929 explores the darkest corners of WWW.

931 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6766 01:04

>>930 created them.

932 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6767 16:25

>>931 liked them better when they were the darkest corners of CERN back in the day.

933 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6767 16:58

>>932 is the only person outside of my private network that accesses my gopher server.

934 Name: !ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-6767 18:19

>>933 is a proud owner of http://dqn.bbs/

935 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6768 11:05

>>934 clicked that link and was disappointed that it did not lead to a whole new world of DQNity.

936 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6768 15:50

>>935 has no need for a DNS server, as he simply memorises all the IP addresses he needs to visit.

937 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6768 16:44

>>936 memorizes all the required IP addresses as a full 32-bit number.

[Is it bad that I still remember the IP addresses of Quartz and Abermud Flathead?]

938 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6768 21:55

>>937 still remembers the IP addresses of Quartz and Abermud Flathead. Which isn't bad, but it's very nerdy.

939 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6783 21:42

>>938 counted Sir Lancelot's bounty during his assault on Swamp Castle.

940 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6783 22:31

>>939 wrote a script to count it for him.

941 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6791 14:15

>>940 Uses e-tanks for energy drinks.

942 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6791 14:22

No Bard is as spoony as >>941

943 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6791 14:39

>>942 is Dr. Insano.

944 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6791 15:05

>>943's doorbell plays a random file from his MP3 collection. In order to ensure true randomness in the selection algorithm, he has it hooked up to a plutonium source in the basement.

945 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6794 14:13

>>944 Programmed a script that will automatically create a 3rd nerd thread the moment this thread reaches 999 posts.

946 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6794 15:43

>>945 optimised >>944's script without his asking.

947 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6794 21:51

>>946 Created a form of knee surgery so that people who took an arrow to the knee can once again become adventurers.

948 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6795 07:43

>>947 founded a Legend of Galactic Heroes LARP group to have some use for his blonde wig collection.

949 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6795 08:46

>>948 has vivid dreams about IRC.

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