( ﾟ -ﾟ) Come on ya bloody wankers!
>>1 is is traditionally made from pig's heart, liver and fatty belly meat or bacon minced together, with herbs added for flavouring and sometimes breadcrumbs. The mixture is shaped in the hand into balls, wrapped round with caul fat (the omentum membrane from the pig's abdomen), and baked. A similar dish, almôndega, is traditional in Portugal.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Formin' queues for no bloo'y reason, just like >>2-9,11-12 did!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) We joined the fuck’eads in P--nix (with an œ, mind you) in eR------k just so we wouldn’t ’ave to be on the same side as the Americans, Canadians, Australians, Irish, Indians, South Africans, and any other Anglospheric types.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) We ’ate you all. It’s our language, tossers.
>>14
Revealed he was a Brit because that was too realistic to be a joke.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Just reciting video game history, ma’am.
most of these are english stereotypes rather than british.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) We occupied the surroundin’ countries and made ’em use our language, BECAUSE WE COULD.
LET'S EAT BEANS AND TOAST
>>20 Makes cars that leak oil and have electrical failures like no other cars on the road.
>>21 is still blaming Margaret Thatcher for his own unwillingness to get out of bed before noon and get a job instead of drinking White Ace cider all day and beating his pregnant, chain-smoking girlfriend.
>>22 is a socialist twat who's still pissed at Margaret Thatcher for bringing the economy back to life when it was so close to collapsing altogether.
>>23 Thinks about Margret Thatcher naked on a cold day when he gets an erection at an inconvenient time.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) The BNP speaks for me, but I still vote Labour.
So hang on, now, are we talking about the previous poster, or are we not? Because this thread is right bloody confusing, as it is.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) when overly drunk like 30% of my countrymen (well, at least it's not as bad as the russians or the irishers!), i speak in the unintelligible manner of ma 'ome village in some shire neither of which you've prolly ever 'eard about if you din't go to school 'ere, wotwot.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) well, school back when. it's all dumbed down now.
(gor blimey, it is not about the previous poster, guv'nor!)
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/――ｒ''''"~~~「 r'''' ＠_＠￣￣~`;､ I drive this old Mini because I'm still mad at the Japanese for killing the British auto industry.
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'''''" ヾニ"::ノ ''''''''"
>>33 Takes a vacation, and then gets sunburned until he is as red as a beet.
As a Scot, I love this thread because you're only making fun of the English, and I hate this thread because you're only making fun of the English.
i often wonder if i'd be offended if someone insulted me for being scottish
( ﾟ -ﾟ) I speak the only Bri'ish accent, ya schupid Yank. All the other ones are fake and can go sod off.
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she.
Programs "Games Yanks Can't Wank"
>>44 hehe that's pretty funny, doesn't offend me no though. I think it's kinda like Renton's speech in Trainspotting, we ken how shit we are so we don't really take offence.
Anyone fancy a deep-fried pizza?
>>45 y'know, as a Scot, it only really upsets me that we were a fundamental part of the KKK.
Other than that, I think we have a pretty fucking cool ancestry. On one hand we were fucking batshit badass warriors, on the other really fucking intelligent businessmen.
>>47 The only thing Scottish about the KKK is the high number of people of scottish descent in southern US at the time. I heard that too but sources seem to debunk it
I agree though, I'm a fucking batshit badass warrior AND a really fucking intelligent businessman.
#14 Stealing words from other languages and and making a dialect out of it does not make it your own. British English is just as much of a clusterfuck as any other form of English.
Knows all about dead parrots
>>50 became so famous in Japan from dancing to anime videos on Youtube that he released a single over there.
I once had sex with a 41 year old mother of two. She was Welsh and ginger.
Ma name's Duncan Campbell fae the shire o Argyll
A've traivellt this country for mony's the mile
A've traivellt thro Irelan, Scotlan an aa
An the name A go under's bauld Erin-go-Bragh
Ae nicht in Auld Reekie A walked doun the street
Whan a saucy big polis A chanced for tae meet
He glowert in ma face an he gied me some jaw
Sayin whan cam ye owre, bauld Erin-go-Bragh?
Well, A am not a Pat tho in Irelan A've been
Nor am A a Paddy tho Irelan A've seen
But were A a Paddy, that's nothin at aa
For thair's mony's a bauld hero in Erin-go-Bragh
Well A know ye're a Pat by the cut o yer hair
Bit ye aa turn tae Scotsmen as sune as ye're here
Ye left yer ain countrie for brakin the law
An we're seizin aa stragglers fae Erin-go-Bragh
An were A a Pat an ye knew it wis true
Or wis A the devil, then whit's that tae you?
Were it no for the stick that ye haud in yer paw
A'd show ye a game played in Erin-go-Bragh
An a lump o blackthorn that A held in ma fist
Aroun his big bodie A made it tae twist
An the blude fae his napper A quickly did draw
An paid him stock-an-interest for Erin-go-Bragh
Bit the people cam roun like a flock o wild geese
Sayin catch that daft rascal he's killt the police
An for every freen A had A'm shair he had twa
It wis terrible hard times for Erin-go-Bragh
Bit A cam tae a wee boat that sails in the Forth
An A packed up ma gear an A steered for the North
Fareweill tae Auld Reekie, yer polis an aa
An the devil gang wi ye says Erin-go-Bragh
Sae come aa ye young people, whairever ye're from
A don't give a damn tae whit place ye belang
A come fae Argyll in the Heilans sae braw
Bit A ne'er took it ill bein caad Erin-go-Bragh
I just had a wank.
>The Prime Minister was captured by ruffians. >>58 is a righteous enough bloke to rescue the Prime Minister.
This thread is racist.
>>64 Can go to all kinds of clubs in London to get high on bath salts
>>66 believes everything he reads in the Daily Mail, and regularly writes complaint letters to the council about his immigrant neighbours.
>>67 Is waiting in an extremely long line at an NHS hospital, while making fun of the yank's medical system.
>>68 drinks five pints of ale a night after work with a side of fish and chips while watching football at the pub.
>>69 was arrested for owning an obscene comic book. Strangely, no arrests were made at the Burn Britain to the Ground for Islam rally.
>>70 contracted swine flu from his university professor, and spent his recuperation period making fun of the pandemic-related media hysteria.
>>71 was arrested and placed under Anti-Social Behavior Order because he was seen on a surveillance camera writing "Prime Minister Cameron is a wanker" on a wall in a back alley.
>>73 wonders why almost every nation decided to drive on the wrong side of the road, and sees it as a sign of others not understanding Britain's obvious superiority.
>>74 cheered at today's Trooping of the Colours, despite considering the royal family a bunch of useless leeches.
>>75 went to Beachy Head today for his weekly pub lunch and the possibility of getting to watch a suicide jumper.
>>77 uses an alphabet containing the letters "haitch" and "zed".
>>79 is a right cheeky cunt ill hook in the gabber, I swer on me mum
>>81 reads the newspapers that spread rumors of celebrity sex lives.
>>82 spends his days admiring grandmother's china. Sometimes he ponders if he should take up rambling.
>>86 has invaded all but 22 countries, although some of the ‘invasions’ were kind of bullshit, like that thing with Switzerland in the 1300s.
>>88 overcooks his vegetables until they turn into a sad unidentifiable puddle of olive-drab glop.
>>89
I'd drive 18 furlongs in my motorized rollingham to have a just a fluid scruple of vegetable ollyboggle like me mum used to make
>>91
not only never seen a toothbrush, but has a deep psychological fear of them
>>94
Complains about any and every other country's nationalism; will knock you the fook out if you say a word agin' the Queen, swer on me life
Me boat when ah've no boat
>>97 leaves everyone unable to recall whether his name is Iva Mill from Biggin Hill or Iva Biggin from Mill Hill.
>>98 loves the joke about the police constable who lives at 999 Letsby Avenue
>>101 can't count - probably a leftover of using the imperial system
>>103
Rages at players and fans of sports that are not soccer, and holds deep rage towards other codes of football
>>106 started an annual international soggy biscuit competition but always loses to the rest of the world
>>107 knows every word to Charles Penrose's 'The Laughing Policeman'