[BEYOND DQN] Someone else's comment from some site nobody knows [PASTE] (999)

1 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7418 11:22

"total crap, but I enjoy it"

150 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7554 01:11

While it never surprised me to discover that "liberal" groups included more vegetarians/vegans than "conservative" groups, I was totally flabbergasted when it became clear that "liberals" are a very sickly crowd. Every "liberal" group we hosted included a large percentage of members, aside from the vegetarians/vegans, who were lactose intolerant, gluten-sensitive, or deathly allergic to one or more of the items on the menu. Meanwhile, the overwhelming majority of the people attending "conservative" conventions cheerfully ate whatever the hell we put in front of them.

151 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7554 16:34

i wish i was dead

152 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7554 17:21

>>151 I'll be right over!

153 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7554 17:29

key lime yogurt, yeah boyeeeee

154 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7554 17:30

My privilege is my intelligence. It's hardly my fault that the other side correctly sees itself as being disadvantaged and underprivileged.

155 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7557 00:31

I was in a bathroom stall when somebody walked in talking on their cell phone and stepped up to a urinal. As soon as I heard the zipper I started making armpit farts until he hung up.

156 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7559 17:27

Dangle your penis in front of the mower, a bit like leading a pig with a carrot on a stick. It's highly exciting. "Will this be the day I chop my winkle off?" You do need quite a gargantuan penis, not a problem for me (as many broken and weeping women will attest), but I get the impression everyone else here has little ones like toothpicks with an olive on the end. ;)

157 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7559 21:05

If I understand college administrators correctly, colleges are hotbeds of racism and rape that everyone should be able to attend.

158 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7560 08:37

^ Your OS is a whore and MSE isn't doing anything to your OS that it doesn't want to be done to it!

159 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7562 19:13

Tell you what, if the gates to hell open suddenly then I come to your house and you provide the swords and the red health potions. If however the world turns into a post apocalyptic wasteland with rampaging mutants and zombies then you come to my house and I provide the shotguns and black leather jackets.

160 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7569 22:54

I don't know if Israeli tanks existed in WWII and a few years after, but their modern day tanks are incredible, for example the Merkava Mk. 4.

161 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7570 15:28

finally, a decent time machine to 1995

162 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7571 14:38

I CURSE ALL KIDS,BABIES,CHILDREN ,FATHERS,MOTHERS,PRE GNANTS AND MAN,WOMAN FERTILITY AND ALL EVANGELIQUES,ALL AUTHORITIES TO DEATH IN NAME OF FATHER SON HOLYSPIRIT,I CONDENM ALL KIDS,BABIES,CHILDREN ,FATHERS,MOTHERS,PRE GNANTS AND MAN,WOMAN FERTILITY AND ALL EVANGELIQUES,ALL AUTHORITIES TO LAKE OF FIRE AND SULFUR IN NAME OF FATHER SON HOLYSPIRIT,DELETE THIS REVIEW ADMIN RETARDED,ASSFUCKED,C UM SWALLOWER

163 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7572 14:18

You could get it in if you approached with enough speed. And yes, I am aware that that's what she said.

164 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7572 14:48

It's common knowledge that life isn't worth living, anyhow.

165 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7573 01:17

>>164 is this what jesus died for?

166 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7574 02:38 

Eat Elephant Feces!

167 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7574 13:49

>>165 jesus died for lack of oxygen to the brain.

(captcha: goy)

168 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7574 18:42

I, too, feared the lumpiness.

169 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7574 19:40

I used to pirate them and play them, now, thanks to steam, i buy them and don't play them.

170 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7575 16:13

To wit, the liberal philosphy in a nutshell:

If you are black/white/hispanic/asian/LGBT and we agree on anything in politics or values = good person
If you are black/white/hispanic/asian/LGBT and we disagree on anything in politics or values =  evil racist bigoted hate speaking Oreo Uncle Tom hatemonger who must be destroyed.

171 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7580 17:39

As much as I disagree with the irresponsibility of getting a degree you can't pay for, watching higher education burn for their crimes would bring great pleasure.

172 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7580 21:25

>>171 This attitude always pisses me off. Leveraging a low interest loan against a high payoff investment is the foundation of capitalism, but as soon as someone under 40 does it it's welfare and terrible.

173 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7580 21:39

>>172
I'm with the Muslims on this one; loans are terrible at any age.

174 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7581 17:14

I blame video games. Well, these particular video games. Nobody with good taste would care for the whole Slenderman thing, so what happens when you make a horror game designed to appeal to stupid people? Stupidity, that's what. Mark my words, soon we'll see one of those Terry kids killing another child by stuffing too many dildos into their ass.

175 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7581 18:34

I just had such a glorious game in Watch Dogs. First haxx0red ctOS center without even stepping into its territory, then cleared up a boatyard, got rid of a bunch of baddies in "industrial accidents", knocked the rest out. When the big mean dude tried to escape, I shot up his car through a doorway making him run on foot, killed a bunch of his henchmen who arrived on cars, chased after that guy, forcing him to go on a peer and beating him up there in front of people. Then I stepped on him and he fell down into a river between a peer and a boat head-first

176 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7582 00:15

I can easily make other people hate me. Making myself hate other people is even less of a challenge. assburgers.png

177 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7582 15:34

Personally I think drinking urine generally makes woment more beautiful.

178 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7582 17:06

Yeah, I never vote yes for anything that could raise my taxes.
I do have kids but throwing money at schools won’t make them any smarter.

179 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7583 07:09

I have to brag- 3 years ago Tyler took me on our first date. He drove from Orlando to South Florida, took me to dinner and a movie, kissed me for the first time, and drove all the way back in one night.. June 4th will always make me smile a little extra. "Falling in love with you was like falling a sleep - slowly, then all at once."

180 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7583 15:30

After a large crash, a police car www hilarious scene to fire police officers who have become desperate in Chicago city
Sanobabitchi! ! !

181 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7585 13:31

I'm with you!! not enough proper grammer in this world...

182 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7588 03:47

wtf is up with all the dick torture in this world i try to show my dick love so please stop the violence

183 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7590 22:26

I'm still fuckin fumin'. All this island slav football hooligan rage is building and I wanna go out and break into a Brazilian restaurant and reck the fucking place and every BR inside

184 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7590 23:22

This is unironically the weirdest plot to an ero-manga I’ve seen. Like, I can deal with eldritch horrors fucking boys and girls for fun, and girls with dicks, and even stories about children being turned into living beer kegs which people also have sex with, but why would somebody dream about their lunchbox coming to life as a 9 year old girl then having sex with it? This ero-manga has made me re-examine the way I’m spending my life, and I’m not sure I’m happy about it all said.

185 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7595 00:21

People who don’t accomplish anything in life are the ones most prone to invoke the word "privilege"!

186 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7595 01:07

If you like glancing directly into the face of Cthulhu, FATAL may be the RPG system for you.

187 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7595 04:00

you cannot possibly know if someone is crazy enough to kill

188 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7596 17:36

She was Chinese Angle.

189 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7597 01:17

I don't see the downside to the Axeknight. Sure, people will make bad jokes, but if they get annoying, well, I have an axe.

190 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7601 20:44

I'm surprised I made it to adulthood at all. When I was in school (70's/80's) and a little later, we were all going to die:

Global cooling/mini ice age (as mentioned)
We were going to run out of oil (as usual)
The population bomb was going to cause global catastrophe
And those three fed of each other for MEGADOOM -
Cooling = less crops, less food.
Oil - fertilizers are made from this = even LESS food, and no oil = freeze in new ice age.
Gabillions of peeps - even LESS food per person!! OMG!!

And throw into the mix:

Killer bees
The heterosexual AIDS epidemic
ozone layer
and later Y2K...

Nothing like stressing out little kids to make them good little helpful citizens, eh?

191 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7602 05:41

Thank you based PAD creators for providing us with more waifus.

192 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7602 23:45

>>190 Yeah, and what's worse is that if you question what you are told, you are labeled a "denier."

193 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7602 23:48

I say again, Nancy Pelosi is not a cunt. Cunts have warmth, depth, a couple of valid uses, and are fun to be with.

194 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7603 09:21

except that isn't true at all either

195 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7604 04:04

Competent white men are the most valuable thing in the world.

196 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7604 04:18

If only there were some... natural explanation for falling and rising temperatures.

Such a hypothetical source of warming would have to be massive, however. On the order of magnitude of our own Sun.

197 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7605 20:34

I refuse to touch "social media" for a much simpler reason: my privacy is precious to me.

I'm not some goggle-eyed hick with a terror of things that have moving parts, either. I'm an opinionated old fart and I was using email and Usenet and mailing lists back before the rest of the world knew about such things, before the Summer that Never Ended.

But. And you knew there was a "but" coming, didn't you?

My friends and family, such of them as are online, have my email address and my phone number. If they want to know what's happening in my life all they have to do is contact me and ask, and we'll talk about it. The idea of getting a Facebook account so that I can say "gosh, the traffic was sure bad today" in the hope that some of the billion or so voyeurs will click the button to "like" my empty declaration of the obvious is repugnant to me. I have a life, thank you very much.

This is over and above the fact that all of these "social media" schemes collect, collate, and sell every scrap of personal information about you that they can. That's their purpose, after all. That's their business model. Mark Zuckerberg didn't start Facebook so that Grandma could look at pictures of your new puppy. He started it to make money, bundling up your personal information, everything he and his company can find out about your life, and selling it all off to the highest bidder. I know that banks do the same thing, but, well, I refuse to have a bank account and I refuse to do business with banks, too, for the same reason.

I am not a number. I am a human being. I am not for sale. My privacy is not for sale. The private details of my life are not for sale. This is not negotiable.

198 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7606 14:04

I can actually tell you with certainty that this shop is reliable simply because I’ve known the owner since middle school and she knows I’ll break her toys and fart on her clothes if she scams anyone.

199 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7607 23:03

Football is played all over the world but in USA they have some kind of wrestling match over a leather egg, yet they call it "football".

200 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7609 02:30

My oc is called toes because they make him rock hard. Oh and his sidekick is called prolapse anus he is a squirrel.

201 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7609 15:23

Women are like children: opportunistic and driven by instinct. And like children, they need to be disciplined sometimes. Unfortunately, when a grown woman has a temper tantrum, she can do a lot more damage than a toddler.

202 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7610 11:22

I can't believe people were so starved sexually back in the day: http://www.pulpinternational.com/pulp/entry/Pages-from-the-Tijuana-bible-Goof-Butts-with-Robert-Mitchum.html

203 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7610 21:28

your retardent

204 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7612 01:00

An empty aggregation of disjointed, meaningless pixels referencing and forming nothing.

205 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7614 02:39

Yes. I find it to be less messy and I have more control over the stimulation

206 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7619 02:02

I tell Yukari to open a portal to the My Little Pony world and turn them all into glue

207 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7624 01:44

Last night I watched a slightly annoying guy spend forever trying to gank a miner who would just log out on him every time. It was funny watching him get angrier and angrier at this dude just wandering along. In his rage and zeal to kill he mistakenly rammed an asteroid in his anaconda almost killing himself.

208 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7624 02:02

While high, convinced by trolls that he should pour laundry detergent into a gaping wound on his toe[39]. This wound was caused when he tripped and tore off his toenail while attempting to find an imaginary bomb in his house[40]. See The Toe Wound for more details.

209 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7625 16:39

While looking for new tattoo ideas, I came across this although I can't remember the key words I used (and hope I never repeat such a path). My first thought was, "Seriously?" I had to ponder what led the person to this depiction.
First, that Daffy and Bugs are reduced to anime seems pointless from the start, but there is an obsession which evidently is inherent in the otaku that requires that all of life should be envisioned as anime. We see that over and over. OK, nothing new.
However, added to this is the weakening of the characters by literally 'personifying' them as teenage boys engaged in cosplay rather than an ornery duck and a mischievous rabbit arguing about what kind of hunting season it is. How is that even effective?! A couple of kids in cosplay arguing about pretending that they are a rabbit and a duck? In the past, I posted how much I hated someone's South Park conversion to manga/anime characters. The result was a 'soft rock' or even a muzak version of the boys' personality. They looked charming and harmless, and it makes me appreciate the genius of the Parker/Stone creations which are not more than incredibly 2-dimensional cut out representations, yet the personality is as raw and undiluted as a shot of tequila.
I started to wonder what else could be absurdly refitted to anime/manga imagery. How about making all the rabbits in Watership Down look like a teenage gang dressed in bunny suits hitting each other with chains and knives in a re-conceived gang survival story in the milieu of the movie The Warriors or something? Meanwhile, the bunny boys extol the fighting prowess of the enemy Efrafans and their own champion Bigwig. Would that be sufficiently surreal? Or how about turning Fritz the Cat into a cute kitty-costumed college student. Sometimes I get the feeling that anime is like a parallel universe to some people where everything is uniformly bug-eyed, tiny-nosed, inanely cute, and lacking in depth. Of course, my critique is harsh, yet I try to understand that for some, going into that universe pleases them and they want to just stay there, forsaking anything outside that universe. Upon returning, such a person needs special glasses that alter the imagery before them and convert it. Granted, this is just one of the aspects of anime that I don't like.
-Nails Nathan

210 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7626 22:57

They all look alike to me….
I’m pretty sure it’s the permanent scowl/”shocked” eyes, and flared nostrils branded on their faces by muscle memory.
Not ONLY did they NOT get a pony on demand, but SOMEBODY ripped a beer and hard boiled eggs w/hot sauce fart, and got away with it, WITHOUT OWNERSHIP , at the tea party table with Barbie and Babar. It begins in grade school.
“You know, if you keep making that face, it’ll be frozen that way….”, no matter the ravage’s of time, elective surgery, obviously “uncomfortable” smile, or new “power” hairstyle.

But, you know, never judge a book by it’s demands that you NOT enjoy life better than the author could ever possibly imagine.

211 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7627 02:58

Little kids believe in Santa Claus. Liberals believe big government works. Both beliefs are equally dumb.

212 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7627 06:02

I let her start using tongue, and then I just vomited. I vomited like I've never vomited before. I imagine it looked something like when Bon Scott choked on his own vomit. I've always wondered what that looked like.

213 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7627 20:22

If your protagonist isn't an orangutang, I'd change that first and foremost.

214 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7627 23:14

Wow, that’s misogynistic.

215 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7629 19:05

I got mine, because I worked for it. The rest of you are on your own to exercise your liberty, live your life, and pursue happiness free of constant government meddling.

216 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7630 12:10

It's pretty simple really; a lot of "big" youtubers (e.g. HowToBasic, ChaBoyyHD, PressFart just to name a few) do this kind of attention whoring to either feel good for getting a lot of "likes", or to direct more people to their channel.

The problem is that their comments are usually low-quality and meaningless; maybe a catch-all phrase or meme that can be attributed to almost anything (e.g. "MLG"). It rarely has anything to do with the video other than the title.

This results in REAL, constructive comments (even comments from the video's owner), with actual meaning and sincerity, being buried underneath garbage like this shit; all because the fanboys of said youtubers jerk themselves off at the thought of their favourite youtuber "liking" something that they also like; so "liking" that comment gives them some false sense of self-worth, because they interacted with somebody "big" on youtube.

The reality is that these "big" youtubers find the most popular videos and post a shitty comment for attention (as I stated in my first paragraph); they don't care who comments on it, and they certainly don't read any of the replies they get (inb4), it's all about the attention and publicity.

TL;DR shit's cancer and it needs to die, also Google+ commenting system is utter garbage.

217 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7630 20:09

Why do men get to decide what is feminine? My boss is super feminine and she benches 350 pounds, shaves her head, and smokes cigars on conference calls, you retrograde misogynist loser with the small prick who lives in your mothers basement.

218 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7634 01:42

Speaking to mechanic: “It’s the tranny.”
Mechanic: “Well don’t let he/she/it drive. Problem solved.”

219 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7634 11:45

Various devices have been utilized to aid in sexual encounters, e.g. dildoes, ticklers and the like. Such devices are utilized directly in the sexual activity. Although the device of the present invention can be utilized as a dildoe, the main purpose and use is to aid in strengthening muscles utilized in sexual encounters and not be used directly. The present device allows the user to develope skills in applying varying amounts of pressure at various times during sexual encounters so as to enhance the enjoyment of both partners. The device may be scaled to develop suitable hand pressure skills, but it is best adapted to test and develop muscles in the vagina. The device may be utilized to develop pressure skills in complete privacy. Such practice on a periodic routine basis with the device of the present invention can give the user knowledge and skill and applying such pressures in both amounts and time as to give maximum enjoyment to both sexual partners when such developed skills are used in actual sexual encounters.

220 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7635 09:40

Vladimir Putin himself has to understand that he can't have his cake and eat it.

221 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7635 16:43

Random old lady: Oh dear you have a booboo on your toe, what happened...

My 4 year old: My toes got fucked up, I didn't cry though.

222 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7636 09:31

Instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a SHITzu.

223 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7636 09:56

This YouTube Web Is A No Cursing Zone!
I Wish YouTube Would Update This Site In The Future: People Who Puts Any Bad Language In There Comments Will Be Cuver The Stars Up. If People Won't Put Star Over Bad Language On There Comments, Then YouTube Will Cuver The Star Up For Them. And I Don't Care If Swearing Not Against The Rules, But Its Always Be Against The Rules.

224 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7636 19:03

It is immediately obvious that George R. R. Martin is a card-carrying, r-Type Leftist. His books are brilliantly plotted, but the writing itself makes all the characters come across as cold and cruel. Reality is being filtered through the mind of a rabbit writing about wolves; all of our good-natured punches-to-the-shoulder are mistaken for bullying, and he thinks that it’s sadism which drives us, rather than the honest joy of competition.

225 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7637 18:18

There is a small portion of the hobby that is absolutely obsessed with these types of figures. I used to run a gladiator game at cons and the same guy would show up every year and ask if I had painted up any naked female gladiators yet. When I would tell him no he would basically say he wasn't interested in the game then. I thought he was joking around the first couple times but after several years it became obvious he was totally serious and annoyed that I hadn't done so.

226 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 01:00

I absolutely adore how the beta launch, and the change log thereof, has caused the Star Citizen thread to dissolve into a bitter realization of how hard Christ Roberts has fucked them over.

227 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 01:27

I much prefer primitive monsters, male or female, to be sculpted with proper anatomy… don't put pants on the troll just to hide its wiggly bits. Demons in particular should be proud and loud about what they're packing.

228 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 07:11

I'm looking for a bento box, it cant be pinku (that's Japanese for pink) or any girl color. It has to be of 2 or more kotoba (that's Japanese for 2 compartments) and has be be chibi (small) sized. And has to be really kawaii (cute). Also It has to be about 10-20 bux. And you have to post pics of it first (i want to make shure it's kawaii [cute]). And it would be nice if it came with matching chopstick holder (WITH chopsticks). OH! and it CANNOT have any cartoon pictures, or be made out of plastic. It has to be made of ceramic, or something like that. Also it would be nice if it was made in japan. and not in china or corea (Korea) or whatever. I have found a bento box similar to the one im describing in e-bay, but it was 1 kotoba, and i don't want my gohan (rice) to touch my other things (it can get wet and i would not like that, plus 2 compartments looks more kawaii)

229 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 15:54

Im 15 years old and at my girlfriends house for dinner and we had about 20 minutes before her mother was finished with dinner so we went into a dark room and started to make out. Her mother called us for dinner and by that time I had a large erection that I couldnt get rid of. I went in to thier bathroom to take care of the problem by masturbating. I rubbed so hard and fast i ended up with a sore in the under side of my penis that feels sort of like a carpet burn. Is there any medication or treatment I can use to help heal the sore or make it numb without going to a doctor because i really dont want to have to explain this to my parents.

230 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 18:03

They don't build, they don't make, they don't construct, they don't manufacture, they don't prepare, they don't sow, they don't mend. Every single profession that we associate with liberalism, teaching, acting, politics, is all talk, but no action, and the thing is when you don't "do anything", you don't know what you're talking about.

231 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7639 18:34

It's not possible to be a decent human being and not support Israel. You can be a "nice guy" (give your neighbor a helping hand with his fence or whatever) but decency demands standing up for the good and the right and against the evil and the wrong and there is no clear case on this earth than the tiny and wonderful, liberal democracy of Israel versus the hate-mongering, corrupt, terrorists running the West Bank and Gaza strip. The lack of morality and decency that sees someone side with evil over good -- not just in this case but across the board -- obviously renders "decency" something that is simply not in their understanding.

232 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7640 14:51

And film discussion is a marvelous thing, but it's constantly bogged down when a bunch of Ignatius J Reillys are competing to see who can snort the most derisively at one another.

233 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7641 03:18

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The Way of No-Sword

Miyamoto Musashi

One day Musashi is challenged by a belligerent samurai while the two are crossing between islands by ferry.

“What’s your style of fighting,” the samurai demands to know. “No-sword” replied Musashi.

Despite Mushashi’s best efforts to ignore him, the samurai picks a fight and Musashi finally agrees to duel the challenger. But, suggests Musashi, rather than fight on the cramped ferry, they should instead fight on that sandbar the ferry is approaching.

The challenger quickly agrees and leaps overboars as the ferry passes the sandbar.

Landing on the sandbar, the samurai whirls, sword at the ready–only to watch the ferry continue on toward the far shore–a, smiling, waving Musashi still on board!

Hours later, drenched in humiliation and dripping rage, the challenger finally wades ashore where he finds Musashi patiently fishing out of a small rowboat.

“You tricked me!” screams the samurai.

“Your eagerness to die tricked you,” shrugs Musashi.

“Your no-sword cannot defeat my real sword!” declares the challenger, advancing menacingly.

“It already has,” Musashi says smugly.

Confused by his intended victim’s apparent lack of concern for his own safety, the challenger hesitates, for the first time noticing Musashi is unarmed.

“Where is your sword?” the samurai demands, on guard against chicanery.

“The No-Swordsman keeps his sword where it will do the most good,” Musashi replies cryptically.

“No more tricks! Where is your weapon?” demands the samurai, his sword raised high.

“There,” sighs Musashi, pointing to the water lapping at the side of the boar.

Still suspicious, the samurai cautiously bends over the gunwale…

“Bah! I see nothing but my own reflection?”

“And that is where the no-swordsman keeps his weapon…in the mind of his enemy!” Musashi explains as he caves the samurai’s skull in with the rowboat’s heavy oak.

Miyamoto Musashi taught we should make our combat attitude the same as our everyday attitude. Like samurai on the battlefield, we must always be alert and prepared to deal with danger–whether an actual physical attack or a psychological incursion into our mental place. Likewise, we should carry our calm and collected attitude from home, our everyday life, out into the stressful world at large.

Source: “Musashi: No-Sword, No-Mind,” from Mental Dominance, by Haha Lung

234 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7641 04:48

Egypt proposes a ceasefire between Hamas and Israel in which everyone ceases to fire.

The (Jewish) US Secretary for state proposes a ceasefire in which Hamas gets a new route to import rockets, now that Egypt is trying to stop them from being smuggled through Egypt, and a big pile of money with which to import them.

There are a lot of things wrong with Jews, but being sneakily cohesive is not one of them.

235 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7644 16:56

Who wants to creep around in Lovecraftian dungeons defeating Shub-Nigguraths when you can run about town shooting rubbish bins, mighty-footing aliens in the face and exchanging currency for questionable 'goods' and 'services'? Some of you, perhaps. Maybe.

236 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7646 11:15

Hi there, Ive been a christian for quite some time now. Many people can hear God speak to them, and know his will for them, but I cant seem to. I cant hear him. I was wondering if you had any ideas of how I could hear God speak to me, and not just me talking to him. Ive tried to listen, but nothing seems to be working. I feel lost.

237 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7647 00:48

All men are created equal. It’s the stuff they do after that which makes some men better than others.

238 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7647 14:40

He does that on a regular basis. It's been awhile, but whenever Kobolds gets butt-hurt about something he throws a party-rant. He likes to tell people how they should RP - usually to a chorus of 'STFU and let people RP how they want".

239 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7647 16:03

Everyone here is wrong. The name Katyusha references a weapon that would launch women named Katyusha onto enemy positions. Learn your history lol.

240 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7648 23:17

if YOU"RE such a fuck'n big shit artist.. what the fuck are you doing trolling CL for bullshit, low paying jobs in the first place?

241 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7649 00:55

Why are there a bunch of adult men standing around looking at a weird assortment of keyboards, and more importantly why does that one guy have a fedora and a ponytail

242 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7652 20:11

Passive-aggressive client ahoy! Evasive maneuvers!

243 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7652 20:58

Pretty much 100% of the stuff women say about themselves can safely be dismissed as bullshit.

244 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7653 17:11

Because this is the internet and opinions are facts.

245 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7654 23:16

At the end of the day, what's in the box matters more than the wrapping.

246 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7654 23:33

@ fanboys above: will you PLEASE rate seriously instead of fooling the readers? Thank you.

247 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7655 15:06

Youtube captions are terrible! I feel sorry for those who are deft...

248 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7656 17:43

To test, try saying “I feel good.” If you hear James Brown singing, you’re in a movie.

249 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7656 18:55

My flaming lib family member moved to the UK so that he could get free health care. I kid you not. But...as he was leaving, he transferred his residency from Michigan (personal income tax, anyone?) to...(wait for it...) TEXAS, which has no personal income tax!

He wants to benefit from other people's tax payments, but doesn't want to leave any loose change on the table.

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