>>4 lost all his friends after junior high.
A brick, inside a sock.
>>10 does absurd fighting stances every time he's holding cutlery.
ICBM.
>>11 always makes sure to issue a final warning before unleashing the paper tiger in his pocket.
A banana
>>15 recently went to the beach and collected some cool rocks and seashells.
Labrys
>>17
Played too much Runescape growing up.
Pure, unbridled rage
>>20 is very diligent about flossing his teeth.
Shrewd diplomacy and careful de-escalation.
>>22 Level 500 Mafia boss or low-level bum gangster
Glock 50 blicky switch, my draco, open carry, wal-mart
>>23 has strong opinions on barbeque condiments.
Syringe filled with mysterious glowing green liquid.
>>26 is too poor to afford guns
Erect AIDS infested homosexual penis
>>29
Simultaneously yearns for and is terrified of emotional intimacy.
Zweihander
>>30 larps as a knight and cosplays as hegel
A sharpened bible for maximum paper cut
>>32 was raped and murdered by Spanish Catholics
Armalite AR-18 gas operated automatic assault rifle + balaclava
>>33 is an IRA larper who’s probably lived in Boston all his life
Vodoo doll
>>34 is very excited for the upcoming Barbie movie.
Seduction, followed by a stiletto dagger to the back.
>>37 is clearly a lowly peasant. Get back in the field!
Scythe (the board game)
>>38 is about to learn some difficult lessons about the offensive and defensive capabilities of cardboard.
A sequence of intricate and beautiful danmaku patterns.
>>39 is appreciated more for their lore than fighting style.
A rock, a strong throwing arm, and good aim.
>>41 is dinosaur jazz man who uses killer driller jive nobody these days understands
A playstation 2 controller
>>42 is a dinosaur who still uses a console from an era where 380p was high def and requires wires eww!
An umbrella with a hidden cyanide injector in the tip
>>43 doesn't have access to radioactive substances and is working for poor-ass spooks, probably North Korea's or something.
A homemade shotgun wrapped in large amounts of duct tape
>>45 is a beloved relic from a simpler time.
Passive-aggressive comments and hostile body language.
>>47 wants to know why did his friend turn into a cannibal.
A bottle of liquid nitrogen.
>>48 is single because he constantly gives everyone the cold shoulder
A mysteriously ticking package
>>51
Is George and Jeb Bush's secret sister
The total strength of Israel's military
>>53 is a pushy bastard at the best of times.
A sniper rifle with a wide angle lens for a sight.
>>57 understands that sometimes the only way to fix things is to burn it to the ground and start over.
Mechanical Pencil (Empty).
>>58 is not very receptive to constructive criticism on his artwork.
Giant robot.
>>60 Even smaller penis.
An army of hand-crafted dolls filled with gunpowder.
>>61 has the second best stage theme in Perfect Cherry Blossom.
Pit full of venomous snakes.
>>62 is an aspiring herpetologist.
Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon.
>>63 is making the mother of all omelets
A flash drive with a zip bomb containing 47 yottabytes of furry porn
>>64 is mentally ill
An IBM Thinkpad running Kali Linux and a Whonix portal
>>65 wears thigh-highs (programming socks) and has their dick locked in a chastity cage
A flamethrower specially equipped with an attachment that allows it to shoot mace at the same time
>>66 is an attractive woman who lives in an urban area
An internet troll farm
>>67 is in the early stages of congestive heart failure due to bulking up on steroids some thirty years ago.
An envenomed bodkin
>>68 is a sign who has lost the ability to have normal conversations due to reading to many fantasy novels.
My hands
>>70 is on the run from the UPRPRC.
An absurd number of throwing daggers.