( ﾟ -ﾟ) My perfect soul mate who I have met, been together with, and loved more than anything in the world can't be with me because she has a child that isn't mine. I fought with her in her custody battle to deny the father visitation rights. I completely reorganized her life by finding her a place to live, a decent job, and even friends. When I started to struggle with stress, she was unable to help me and my self loathing tendencies drove us apart. This happened several times and now there's nothing left in me. The only way I know how to cope is drinking.

I have no job, my friends have left me one by one, I'm about to get kicked out of my university for failing an entire semester, I've alienated my family, I'm in debt, my lease is about to expire and I have nowhere to live, and she's gone. I can't even leave my apartment anymore because everything in the world scares me and the luxury of being able to hide here is about to disappear.

I don't know what to do.