( ´ω`) Just piss in it, Billy.
( ´ω`) I'm outta here.
|ミ
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|ω`)
|ミ
(・∀・) Grandpa, did you know that bawitdaba da bang, da dang diggy diggy, diggy, said the boogie, said up jump the boogie?
( ´ω`) Now go to bed, you turdstrangling barcalounger.
( ´ω`) Once upon a time the Yankees invaded Hawaii. We quickly took it back with a decisive surprise bombing on their main Pacific naval base.
( ´ω`) So a lot of fighting and about four years later, we leveled a couple of cities on the East Coast from the air and the Americans surrendered unconditionally. I did my patriotic duty and piloted 5 aircraft straight into their ships--the last one was a twofer, so make that 6 sinkings. After that they wouldn't let me fly another one, on account that "those gaijin were on their way to liberate Vietnam" or something, it didn't sound important.
( ´ω`) We put up a good showing for a diplomatically isolated island nation with basically no metal, coal, oil, rubber, manufacturing capabilities, or manpower, in relative terms. That is what is truly worth fighting for, Junior, making sure the native peoples and tongues of Manchuria and Korea are brutally suppressed in favor of Tokyo's whims and dialect.
( ´ω`) zzzzZzzz
( ｀ハ´） ...
( ｀ハ´） I had hoped to barter for some soy sauce, but it seems these delicious baozi are for you and not your grandfather, child. Good day!
(・∀・) You should drop by the Soy Boy on Third & Buttlumps. They got the best soy sauce ever!
( ｀ハ´） Indeed. Third and Buttlumps, you say?
(・∀・) Did I fucking stutter?
(・∀・) There are two kinds of people in this world, and you're the second kind.
( ´ω`) Or tongue bath. I'm not particular.
(・∀・) Why would you need a bath for your tongue?
( ・-・) How about a lung bath?
(・∀・) How many lungs can you fit in a bathtub?
( ´ω`) Of course, I'm used to dealing with bathtubs full of children's lungs. If it's adult lungs we're talking about, it would obviously be less.
( ´ω`) If you get a variety of lung sizes in there, you can make the most incredible noise by lying down on them in the tub.
(・∀・) Grandpa, why do people bump threads that died a natural death ages ago?
( ´ω`) Buncha crybabies.
(・∀・) I know this story! It's about birds and bees!
(・∀・) Hail Asmodeus! La! La!
( ´ω`) The vast bubbling craters of boiling pus...
( ´ω`) ... But enough about your grandmother. What's on TV?
( ⊙ω⊙) WOW lookit those boobies Junior
( ´ω`) it seems today has become another day all over again.
( ´ω`) It wasn't.
( ´ω`)
(・∀・) I get it, you're God.
( ´ω`) Shut up before I send two she-bears out of the woods to maul you.
( ´ω`) Shut up before I summon a pack of dire wolves to tear you limb from limb, saving your head for last to maximize your suffering.
( ´ω`) Which book of the Bible did I put the dire wolves in again? Ezekiel? Eddard? Tyrion?
( ・ω・) The Bible's an exaggerated story. God is everywhere and in everything. There is no devil its all one thing.
(・∀・) Does that mean tribes of warrior women will fight over me as irreplaceable breeding material? Yes, please.
(・∀・) Nobody wants to repopulate the earth with more abominations like you, freakazoid.
( ・ω・) Entertainment Weekly says I'm loved by millions around the world.
( ・ω・) They even have contests with the store-bought Clonepas to see how long they can keep one alive! It's fun!
(・∀・) But Grandpa! You advertise them as "Your fully disposable friend that you an do anything to and not feel bad about it!"
( ´ω`) We used to catch, neuter and release feral Clonepas, but China no longer imports Clonepa testicles as a rare gourmet delight, so it's easier to shoot 'em.
( ´ω`) Incidentally, like tomcats, neutered Clonepas are prone to bladder stones, so we usually cut a hole further up the shaft so there's less likely to be blockages. Much better than them spraying urine everywhere to mark their territory, though.
( ´ω`) But enough of that. Who wants dinner? I found some fish sticks and chicken balls in the freezer. Just need to bread them and toss them in the fryer.
(・∀・) Grandpa, is it true that the rooster's left ball is usually bigger than the right one?
( ・ω・) I thought we didn't have bladders. Our blood just keeps getting more full of pee until we die.
(・∀・) Gramps, do I have enough swag to beat my high school bully?
(・∀・) Grampapples, are we gonna die of climate change or what? I heard a little Swedish girl thinks so, and they're always right.
(・∀・) Sorry Grampoop. I meant only a little disrespect.
( ´ω`) That's better.
( ´ω`) So how's life treating you, Juniwhore?
(・∀・) Gets better every day, Grampissbucket!
> itai
( ・-・) That is not an English word why did you say it
( ´ω`) You're all the sort of pansy-arsed little faggots that is causing today's nanny state.
( ´ω`) When I was growing up, getting raped was just my Dad's way of saying "Good Morning".
(・∀・) You have a Dad? What's he like?
(・∀・) Do you have a Grandpa too?
( ´ω`) You're not ready to hear about the Arch Grandpa yet, Jujubee.
(・∀・) That's ok. I prefer FreeBSDpa
( ´ω`) Communist.
(・∀・) From you according to your abilities,
(・∀・) To me according to my needs.
(・∀・) Best political system EVAR.
( ・ω・) You know, communism and anarcho-capitalism have a surprising amount in common in that regard.
( ・ω・) They both specifically mention Junipoops here is the main beneficiary of everyone else's labor.
(・∀・) Grump what's your favorite video game?
(0∀0) those are the apps you play on the cinputer gernpo
( ・ω0/.,) Fnrak barnmen isas a goice man man. Creature and, brave. Sons to the ram
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(・∀・) Budget cuts grandpa. We're getting replaced with a new cast due to delays and the overall lack of quality of this thread.
( ・ω・) Delays? Look at how much content we've released since the start of the month!
( ・ω・) It's so much better than our productivity during August 1993.
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・) >>326 get the fuck out of my house
(・∀・) Replacepa, what was life like before character threads died?
( ´ω`) It was wonderful, like Portland before the Californians fucked it all up.
))<>((
(・∀・) Haven't seen you in a while, Goatsepa!