I raise up
to only fall down
drown in the tears of the wallyb
for it is you that will have to be
TONIGHT
鳥目
至りも 仇バレ 鳥目
雨の 雨の 拉致レー
拉致レーも 鳥目
The golden mean
Must yet be seen
Some do prize
The average size
If moderation
Is your wave
You have friends at
Burma-Shave®
Nerd Porn Auteur
by Ernest Cline
I've noticed that there don't seem to be any porno movies
that are made for guys like me.
All the porn I've come across
was targeted at beer-swilling sports bar dwelling alpha-males
Men who like their women stupid and submissive
Men who can only get it up for monosyllabic cock-hungry nymphos
with gargantuan breasts and a three-word vocabulary
Adult films are populated with these collagen-injected
liposuctioned women
Many of whom have resorted to surgery and self-mutilation
in an attempt to look the way they have been told to look.
These aren't real women. They're objects.
And these movies aren't erotic. They're pathetic.
These vacuum-headed fuck bunnies don't turn me on.
They disgust me.
And it's not that I'm against pornography.
I mean, I'm a guy. And guys need porn.
Fact.
"Like a preacher needs pain, like a needle needs a vein,"
Guys need porn.
But I don't wanna watch this misogynist he-man woman-hater porn.
I want porno movies that are made with guys like me in mind:
Guys who know that the sexiest thing in the world
is a woman who is smarter than you are.
You can have the whole cheerleading squad,
I want the girl in the tweed skirt and the horn-rimmed glasses:
Betty Finnebowski, the valedictorian.
Oh yes.
First I want to copy her Trig homework,
and then I want to make mad, passionate love to her
for hours and hours
until she reluctantly asks if we can stop
because she doesn't want to miss Battlestar Galactica.
Summa cum laude, baby!
That is what I call erotic.
But do you ever see that kind of a woman in a contemporary adult film?
No.
Which is why I'm going to start writing and directing Geek Porno.
I shall be the quintessential Nerd Porn Auteur.
And the women in my porno movies will be the kind
that drive nerds like me mad with desire.
I'm talking about the girls that used to fuck up the grading curve.
The girls in the Latin Club and the National Honor Society.
Chicks with weird clothes, braces, four eyes, and 4.0 GPAs.
Brainy articulate bookworms, with MENSA cards in their purses
and chips on their shoulders.
My porn starlets will come in all shapes and sizes.
My porn starlets will be too busy working on their PhD to go to the gym.
In my kind of porno movies the girls wouldn't even have to get naked.
They'd just take the guys down to the rec room and
beat them repeatedly at chess
and then talk to them for hours about Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle
or the underlying social metaphors in the Aliens movies.
Buy stock in some hand cream companies
because there is about to be a major shortage.
And I'm not just talking about straight porn. Oh no.
There should be fuck films for my nerd brethren
of all sexual orientations.
Gay nerd porn flicks with titles like "Dungeons and Drag-queens."
This idea is a fucking gold mine.
I am gonna make millions,
because this country is full of database programmers
and electronics engineers
and they aren't getting the loving they so desperately need.
And you can help . . .
If you're an intelligent woman is interested in breaking into the adult film industry,
and if you can tell me the name of Luke Skywalker's home planet,
then you are hired.
It doesn't matter if you think you're overweight or unattractive.
It doesn't matter if you don't think you're beautiful.
You are beautiful. . .
And I will make you a star.
government didn't renew
my letters of marque, they rigged it
now what am i gonna do
to fly my friggen frigate
So here I yam
Doin' everything I can
Holdin' on to what I yam
Pretandin' I'm a sailor man
Roses are red
That much is true
But violets are violet,
you cretin, not blue.
If I ruled the world, my cock would be long
and I'd rock a LAN party in an edible thong
I'd meet a genie and he'd give me three wishes
motherfucker, they're all about PENISES
Yar har fiddle dee-dee
Downloading movies and novels for free
See what you want without library fees
You are a pirate
I love my coins
I love them so
I love my coins
to spend on a ho
I love my coins
I love them so
so gimme my silver coins
killer black jungle animal
ebola and AIDS
the mighty puma
I wrote this this morning about an amazing dream I had last night
It's called Everything Just Falls Apart
A big fight broke out in the bar
Fists, knives and glass falls apart
I ducked for cover and you were there
We went upstairs
You lay down beside me and we held each other close
How long has it been?
You told me how your life was going
And I told you I really really really really really really loved you
You're the one I love the most
You held me tighter and kissed me
Your face went red
And you said
Omg I forgot how massive your cock is
Omg
Wait what could all these black things be
Haha are those bugs? Do you have fleas?
No no my love, my darling angel
See my leather hat sitting there
It's falling apart
These wee bits of leather get everywhere
You said “i'm so wet, you're making me forget
I have a new life with someone new
Oh but you're so hard and big
And I feel funny between my legs
Wait, try this, maybe this'll do?”
You pulled from a drawer,
A Birdseye chicken steak
But it had a human fanny
"Why don't you fuck this dinner" you said
But it fell apart when I tried
Rudy, sweating brown bile,
Is sick, Trumpvirus style,
It's not that depressing,
If you look at the blessing,
It's the first case he's won in a while!
The globe is sadly groaning with debt, poverty and strife
And billions now are pleading to enjoy a better life
Their hope lies with resources buried deep within the earth
And the enterprise and capital which give each project worth
Is our future threatened with massive debts run up by political hacks
Who dig themselves out by unleashing rampant tax
The end result is sending Australian investment, growth and jobs offshore
This type of direction is harmful to our core
Some envious unthinking people have been conned
To think prosperity is created by waving a magic wand
Through such unfortunate ignorance, too much abuse is hurled
Against miners, workers and related industries who strive to build the world
Develop North Australia, embrace multiculturalism and welcome short term foreign workers to our shores
To benefit from the export of our minerals and ores
The world's poor need our resources: do not leave them to their fate
Our nation needs special economic zones and wiser government, before it is too late
Moshe says do not eat pork
Interest twixt Jews? not a shekel
On Shabbos you are not to work
Also, cut off the skin of your shmekl
kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself
mr red pilled anti semite podcast man
the world doesn't need you
you don't have any friends
kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself
mr red pilled anti semite podcast man
unpersoning living emoticons
to own the gulliboomers
what times these be
how righteous we
nymphomaniacal Jill
tried a dynamite stick for a thrill
they found her vagina
in North Carolina
and bits of her tits in Brazil
’TWAS in the month of December, and in the year 1883,
That a monster whale came to Dundee,
Resolved for a few days to sport and play,
And devour the small fishes in the silvery Tay.
So the monster whale did sport and play
Among the innocent little fishes in the beautiful Tay,
Until he was seen by some men one day,
And they resolved to catch him without delay.
When it came to be known a whale was seen in the Tay,
Some men began to talk and to say,
We must try and catch this monster of a whale,
So come on, brave boys, and never say fail.
Then the people together in crowds did run,
Resolved to capture the whale and to have some fun!
So small boats were launched on the silvery Tay,
While the monster of the deep did sport and play.
Oh! it was a most fearful and beautiful sight,
To see it lashing the water with its tail all its might,
And making the water ascend like a shower of hail,
With one lash of its ugly and mighty tail.
Then the water did descend on the men in the boats,
Which wet their trousers and also their coats;
But it only made them the more determined to catch the whale,
But the whale shook at them his tail.
Then the whale began to puff and to blow,
While the men and the boats after him did go,
Armed well with harpoons for the fray,
Which they fired at him without dismay.
And they laughed and grinned just like wild baboons,
While they fired at him their sharp harpoons:
But when struck with,the harpoons he dived below,
Which filled his pursuers’ hearts with woe.
Because they guessed they had lost a prize,
Which caused the tears to well up in their eyes;
And in that their anticipations were only right,
Because he sped on to Stonehaven with all his might:
And was first seen by the crew of a Gourdon fishing boat
Which they thought was a big coble upturned afloat;
But when they drew near they saw it was a whale,
So they resolved to tow it ashore without fail.
So they got a rope from each boat tied round his tail,
And landed their burden at Stonehaven without fail;
And when the people saw it their voices they did raise,
Declaring that the brave fishermen deserved great praise.
And my opinion is that God sent the whale in time of need,
No matter what other people may think or what is their creed;
I know fishermen in general are often very poor,
And God in His goodness sent it drive poverty from their door.
So Mr John Wood has bought it for two hundred and twenty-six pound,
And has brought it to Dundee all safe and all sound;
Which measures 40 feet in length from the snout to the tail,
So I advise the people far and near to see it without fail.
Then hurrah! for the mighty monster whale,
Which has got 17 feet 4 inches from tip to tip of a tail!
Which can be seen for a sixpence or a shilling,
That is to say, if the people all are willing.
SKI SKO SKY SKUM!
Stick a finger up your bum!
Take a whiff, take a sniff,
Fart upon the screen
Chew some gum :)
>>418 I recognise this as the work of renowned shitty poet William McGonagall, and I've seen that particular whale's skeleton the poem is about!
Oh! where have you been, my son, my son?
We have not met since the morn was young.
“I left the North, good mother, to see
The whaling fleet in bonnie Dundee.”
Oh! why went you tbere, my son, my son,
Within the range of their banging gun?
“Fear not, mother, ’twas only a lark,
I reckoned they would shoot wide of the mark.”
Ah! Finny, my boy, is it not vile,
They do so thirst for our precious ile?
“Yes, mother, for our good blubber they pine,
But I took care they didn’t get mine.”
Pray, tell me, did they not chase you, dear,
With harpoons, lances, and such like gear?
“What if they followed me, don’t despond,
Chasing’s not catching, mother fond.
They follow’d me up, they follow’d me down,
In view of gaping folk of the town;
But I, when they thought to take sure aim,
Skedaddled, and sent them ‘swearin’ hame.'”
Go never again, my son, my son,
Rest content with the laurels you’ve won;
“Trust me, mother, they may know about bales ―
I’m blowed if they know as much about whales.
A party was sent the other day
To do for ma slick in Cowrie’s Bay;
My eye! they peppered it hot on poor me,
Then found it was only a rock. He! he!”
A demand that I send
A cheerful message to a friend
I haven't spoken to in a while
I cannot comply
All my friends are pretend
Except one who's a crocodile
SHOOTGUN SHELLS ARE RED
DEMONS ARE NOCTURNAL
HALO MIGHT BE INFINITE
BUT DOOM IS ETERNAL
first they came for miranda's ass, and i didn't say anything because I'm not a casual who plays ME.
then they came for joel's whiteness and i didn't say anything because i don't watch western media.
then they came for my anime tiddies, and there was no one left to speak for them.
"What times these be
How righteous we"
Shut up lol
I fucked thee
Gutless McConnell
Weaseling out
Benedict Arnold
Was much more stout
~fin~
Stumbling through the kitchen after a long day
Finding all my pots and pans in utter disarray
The predatory waterfowl into my eyes did gaze
And quoth: i am a heron i ahev a long neck and
1 Lord, you are the God who saves me;
day and night I cry out to you.2 May my prayer come before you;
turn your ear to my cry.3 I am overwhelmed with troubles
and my life draws near to death.4 I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
I am like one without strength.5 I am set apart with the dead,
like the slain who lie in the grave,whom you remember no more,
who are cut off from your care.6 You have put me in the lowest pit,
in the darkest depths.7 Your wrath lies heavily on me;
you have overwhelmed me with all your waves.[d]8 You have taken from me my closest friends
and have made me repulsive to them.I am confined and cannot escape;
9 my eyes are dim with grief.
I call to you, Lord, every day;
I spread out my hands to you.10 Do you show your wonders to the dead?
Do their spirits rise up and praise you?11 Is your love declared in the grave,
your faithfulness in Destruction?12 Are your wonders known in the place of darkness,
or your righteous deeds in the land of oblivion?13 But I cry to you for help, Lord;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.14 Why, Lord, do you reject me
and hide your face from me?15 From my youth I have suffered and been close to death;
I have borne your terrors and am in despair.16 Your wrath has swept over me;
your terrors have destroyed me.17 All day long they surround me like a flood;
they have completely engulfed me.18 You have taken from me friend and neighbor—
darkness is my closest friend.>>427
have to admit I didn't realize the first emo music lyrics were written by a Jewish priest between c. 516 BCE and 70 CE
She wore her hideous pajamas
To keep me unaroused
I’m feeling kinda frisky
but tonight, I’m not allowed
She wore her flannel pants with footsies
with prints of buttercups
She’s clinging to her bedside
Those pants are staying up
She wore her facial green mudpack
To try to keep me scarred
She’s covered head to toe
And nothing will be barred
Her hair is wrapped in plastic
smells like the Fotomat
She knows I need some loving
But there’ll be none of that
She think she’s got my number, as she prepares to slumber
She thinks there’s no one dumber than me
Though it’s loving she is loathing, takes more than ugly clothing
That’s hardly a repellent for me
She wore her hideous pajamas
To kill the passion off
Fire retardant nightwear
Ain’t nothin’ comin’ off
Her silkie things are missing
Must be in storage somewhere
and for maximum effect
she’s wearing giant underwear
She’s lying there smirkin, she thinks her plan is workin
she doesn’t care that she’s jerkin’ me
But let me tell you honey, all though it may sound funny
You still look pretty sexy to me
that’s right – in those hideous pajamas
I rote a pohum
eevun thow I canot spel
I rime wen I tel.
I rate a poem
1/10
Did not make me contemplate
People always say that my security's bad, sorry for data breaching!
Users complain, sayin' take it down, sorry for data breaching!
ISC2 don't like me, 'cause I'm the spotlight, sorry for data breaching!
When they talk s***, we just be like, sorry for data breaching!
While I nodded, nearly napping.
suddenly there came a clapping,
As of ass cheeks gently clapping,
clapping at my chamber door.
“tis a visitor," i muttered,
"dummy thicc, and nothing more"
i have a shit, i have a liberal
uh! shitlib
i have a liberal, i have a retard
uh! libtard
shitlib... libtard...
uh! horseshoe theory
professor Bigglesworth
experiences a dearth
of tight little butts
oh woe - it's grows late
he may have to masturbate
In days of old,
when knights were bold,
and toilets weren’t invented,
they’d drop their load upon the road,
and walk away contented.
But now today,
or so they say,
a stink is much resented,
and so we poo upon a loo,
because we aren't demented.
> Are you sure you mean Anglo-Saxon political traditions? Like, Angles and Saxons, the people of medieval England? Were you just trying to do a dog whistle and it got a little out of hand?
“Nay,” said the America First Caucus. “To the mead-hall!”
And with great clattering of sword and shield and mail-shirts
And plunder and heavy gold-wrought arm bands from their lord,
They went to the mead-hall, the shield-hall, the stronghold of Donald
And unfolded their minds, thus.
“Absolutely we meant Anglo-Saxon political traditions!” cried they
Shield clanging on shield and helm on helm.
“What could be more American than this?”
> Did the Anglo-Saxons even know about America?
“HROTHGAR!” the caucus responded, with a loud cry. “Hlothhere!
Do not all our laws begin with an unpronounceable ‘HR,’ as befits an Anglo-Saxon?
Where is Wiglaf?! This is what we meant.
I ask nothing better than to sit in the throne-hall of my lord, ring-giver, great in arms
While a demon comes rampaging into the hall and wreaks woe,
And much do we thanes thole — this is precisely what I mean!”
> What’s all this about architecture?
“Wattle-and-daub was well enough for Wiglaf,” cried the caucus,
“And well shall it be for me, in the hall of my lord and torque-bearer!
Stone is in the manner of the Romans, and I shun it for construction.
By European architecture, I meant a sturdy timber hall,
Lined with shields, and rich with plunder.
That is all the architecture I seek, and is definitely what I meant.”
> Okay. This seems like it was pretty clearly just supposed to be a dog whistle and now you’re tripling down.
“When I spoke,” cried Marjorie Taylor Greene, hammering shield with sword,
“I weighed each word! Let us have maethlfrith!
Let us have drihtinbeage! We must make America Geat again!
We shall be ruled by bailiffs and reeves,
And we shall give way before the law of Æthelberht!
Three shillings boot if a man strike another with a fist upon the nose!
No feax-fang without sore punishment! Hearken, ceorls!”
This is the Anglo-Saxon tradition and culture you had in mind? It’s not just that you thought you were being subtle with your nativism and instead wound up committing yourself to a specific history and culture you didn’t mean to?
Paul A. Gosar lifted his long arm, making merry with his mead
And unlocked his word-hoard, the treasure of his mind:
“What culture could we crave beyond the Dream of the Rood?
The Bede is Venerable enough for me. What man speaks against him?
We must revive the ancient American art of sitting by the sea lamenting the passing of our lord.
What could be more American than alliterative poetry about tearing the arm off Grendel,
Writ in a tongue none has spoke for a thousand year?
My thews are weary. We must take down this obelisk of stone and heave up a barrow
To give glory to our great Founders who have passed.
Ea-la! My kinsmen! Ea-la! A spear-bearing host!
Of the Constitution writ upon much vellum, we seek to know nothing.
We gaze with dour eyes upon the land of freedom and opportunity
Where voting happened even a limited amount
And representative government rules wheat-lands and peach-lands.
We long instead to exult in battle with our hammered blades,
Those classic American things that are very American.
America first, obviously! This all follows!”
And they clashed shield on shield, and a great shout went up.
Mail-shirt and sword resounded with a clang, and the caucus roared,
And the roar echoed where the sea-birds
Picked the carcass of the Republican Party.
"aloha akbar", said the hawaiian terrorist
"it means hello, but it also means goodbye."
Edge Of A Ceiling
Front
O: It Thrusts Down
AD+O: It Thrusts DownBack
O: It Thrusts Down
AD+O: It Thrusts DownAnd you may find yourself
Watching Neopronoun discourse in the replies to genshin impact fan art
And you may ask yourself
How did I get here?
At the crossing 'tween
Long Lane and Short,
There once was seen
A certain sort.
Their hands hung low,
They spittled in spurts,
And long hair would grow
To cover some wart.
Those folks are long gone,
Now young ones cavort.
And they tell chilling stories
About Long Lane and Short.
six mixed pixie kids
switfly sift
sixty-six
pixie dust buckets
I
Burn
7-Day Candles, and I
SPIN
Funk like myrrh
According to the Śvētāmbara version,
Parshva married Prabhavati,
And Mahāvīra married Yashoda
Who bore him a daughter named Priyadarshana
The two sects also differ on the origin of Trishala
(Mahāvīra's mother)
As well as the details of Tirthankara's biographies
Such as how many auspicious dreams their mothers had
When they were in the wombs.
i dipped thine hands into the pond
removing grit into the beyond
now it is frowned upon
the soils not black its bronze
dirt settles down and gets gone
words form a polymerization bond
the battle i won
Please inseminate my goat, Gil,
Please inseminate my goat.
She likes it when you grab her throat, Gil,
Then inseminate my goat.
Altogether now
I'm DQN
Raised by a hen
My home, my den
Razed with a pen
Jehovah wasn’t all that they Witnessed that day, as I took a pamphlet and stuffed it down my bum crack
Following some well-lit* Acts of bloody ultra-onanism,
Her daughter - despite so many hollow years between us -
Offers burnt daisies
She died on an upright spike in an earlier life
Passed down to the wire, and preach to the choir
A long time has passed since the war within
A soul laid bare through coded ceremonies
After only five to ten well-lit Acts of gory ultra-onanism
She was LED to think of it in such gauche terms as this
The way Yahweh relaxed input
The way fluid ignores her bath
*light emitting diodes (LEDs)
uhhh ding dang
uh doo doo
dang dinga
braaaaappfffftt
dooodoo poopoo
Your pulchritudinous puffs
Are imploding my tympanics
Please purchase a pop filter
Posthaste!
A love song of Shu-Suen (Shu-Suen B): translation
Man of my heart, my beloved man, your allure is a sweet thing, as sweet as honey. Lad of my heart, my beloved man, your allure is a sweet thing, as sweet as honey.
You have captivated me (?), of my own free will I will come to you. Man, let me flee with you -- into the bedroom. You have captivated me (?); of my own free will I shall come to you. Lad, let me flee with you -- into the bedroom.
Man, let me do the sweetest things to you. My precious sweet, let me bring you honey. In the bedchamber dripping with honey let us enjoy over and over your allure, the sweet thing. Lad, let me do the sweetest things to you. My precious sweet, let me bring you honey.
Man, you have become attracted to me. Speak to my mother and I will give myself to you; speak to my father and he will make a gift of me. I know where to give physical pleasure to your body -- sleep, man, in our house till morning. I know how to bring heart's delight to your heart -- sleep, lad, in our house till morning.
Since you have fallen in love with me, lad, if only you would do your sweet thing to me.
My lord and god, my lord and guardian angel, my Cu-Suen who cheers Enlil's heart, if only you would handle your sweet place, if only you would grasp your place that is sweet as honey.
Put your hand there for me like the cover (?) on a measuring cup. Spread (?) your hand there for me like the cover (?) on a cup of wood shavings.
It is a balbale of Inana.
can barely remember when this was, but
this one time i wanted to visit monticello because it wasn't far and wouldn't take me too long, but
it turns out you have to pay for tickets which is fair enough i guess, but
that would have put the trip over budget, so
Well you finally funged my monkey
Yes you finally funged my monkey
Yes we finally
funged your
monkey
N-F-T
Bereft of QUALITY, I drift alone.
The Internet no longer provides a home.
Bereft of options, I masturbate to Pone,
Until I degrade into a filthy gnome
With ears full of porn noise drone.
I'm so alone
And it's late at night
I hope no one phone
While it's late at night
I may have found why every Swiss I've met has been a bitch
It's not as if the banks are making normal people rich
I miss you little strawberry, now you're so far away
I yearn for your enormous tongue each and every day
With texture like a peanut shell, you tickled every cranny
You guided me through Penis Hell and then I licked your fanny
I moistened up your USB, you did the same to me
The way you blocked my air supply was truly ecstasy
You left your sticky residue, it tastes like fine French wine
I close my eyes and fantasise, our bodies intertwine
Come back to me hot mama, I think you're really cool
I know it's an acquired taste, this semen from a bull
I'm sorry that I made you cry, the spunk was just too fizzy
When you left without a word you left me feeling dizzy
So come back honeybunny, I want all your saliva
If I don't have you next to me, I don't think I'll survive-a
Some shitty goatse poetry, courtesy of the Sageru IRC GPT3 bot with some mild cleanup courtesy of me.
The initial prompt,
gpt3: give a long, highly verbose description of "goatse" in 19th century poetic language
was given three times, and the three poems outputted edited together into this:
Oh, goatse, what a sight to behold!
A most peculiar and curious sight,
A sight that would make one's heart grow cold,
A deep, dark cold that fills one with fright.
A gaping maw, wide and deep,
An immense hole that will cloud your sleep.
A most curious sight, a sight to behold,
A sight that would make one's heart grow cold,
A sight that would make one's stomach churn,
A sight that would make one's courage burn.
A most curious sight, a sight to behold,
The sight of a man with a gaping hole.
A man, with his back to the viewer,
His posterior exposed, a most curious pose.
Hands stretched wide, wide as a sewer,
A sight that would make one's stomach close.
A most curious image, a most curious sight,
A sight that would make one's heart take flight.
A man, with his back to the viewer,
His posterior exposed, a most curious feature.
The maw of a most horrific creature.
A man with a gaping hole in his backside,
A man with a gaping hole that was wide.
A most curious sight, a sight to behold,
The sight of a man with a gaping hole.
A man with a gaping hole that was wide,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with pride.
A most curious sight, a sight to behold,
The sight of a man with a gaping hole.
A man with a gaping hole that was wide,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with pride,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with dread.
A most curious sight, a sight to behold,
The sight of a man with a gaping hole.
A man with a gaping hole that was wide,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with pride,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with dread,
A man with a gaping hole that was filled with shame.
>>461
Definitely going to be sharing this one with the literary society.
Watching the shrinking friend list over the years
Inactivity and no chats
Antisocial network fading away
Fading away
Suckin me off in the bathroom
Stuffin my ass with his dong
Fillin me softly with his cum
Fillin me
Softly
With his cum
Spendin my whole life
With his schlong
Fillin me softly
With his cuuuuUUUuuuuUuuUUUUuuuummm
piss on the floor.
shit on the door.
when you get bored then just do it some more.
my rhymes are piss poor
I cannot be ignored
prepare to get blasted
its a full on piss war
hey dough kyun I have not been here in a year or three or five I forgot it existed
here is my rhyme I wrote it in a minecraft book just today
Here mid the 'ther
thou quondam were
attending to thy drubbing
I came, you went
to heaven sent
now part thy loins for rubbing
For what's a flow'r
at any hour
if not for bees to cherish
Your eyes alight
your pokies bright
your pusy (sp) glowing garish
I see your need
thus 'llow me Sneed
ere I give you the Chucking
Your lips may purse
let slip a curse
just 'llow me do the fucking
Thy burning lips
'twixt netherhips
are screaming for a dicking
Thy bean is swole
thy mind unwhole
thy clit shall get a flicking
>>467
my book has sneed in it as well
This city is lonely without you.
It's a sickening thought;
reminds me of a shitty Rupi Kaur line
that I scoffed at in a shitty cafe.
I didn't know you, then,
so it was easy to laugh at the woman
who, shit at writing as she was,
had somehow touched the core.
The flailing, feeble attempt of mankind
to capture that wordless feeling
inflicted by the ones they loved,
that swelled in their chests
and filled them so wholly,
and left them so empty--
just watching someone try was
a deeply moving sight.
This is a haiku
OP is a fat faggot
Longcat is long lulz
And the crowds below kept weeping
as my anus went on seeping,
dripping freely without cause,
bathing all in brown applause.
To set the mood
Firewater in the morning
Being a pseud
Never felt so smooth
Rhoda was in a Dreadful State
When She got Raped
She expressed her life
With 2 Tone Vibes
She Might now want to vape
If She Still alive
Shell never get over that Rape
Its Just the Same olde
Show
With a man that Knows
How to linger then finger
God our World is So fucking Sick
Im Glad Im Into Dick
What Women who Reads this
feels like a olde Boiler
Pecker's set to testify, a hopeful sign,
At Trump's trial, shedding light, a promising line,
His impending testimony, a storm on the rise,
Bodes well for Democracy, as truths materialize.
I met a traveler from an antique land
Who said: a shitty queerbait ship
Stands in the desert. Near it, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered fandom lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tells that its fans well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on those lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal, these words appear:
"My name is DESTIEL, King of Ships:
Look on MY website, ye mighty, and despair!"
No thing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
CHIM chim-i-ney, CHIM chim-i-ney, CHIM CHIM cher-ee!
I is what I yam, and I yam what I be.
CHIM chim-i-ney, CHIM chim-i-ney, CHIM CHIM cher-oo!
Dick van Dyke is so old he's outliven you.
You look like a monkey, and you smell like one, too.
I hereby grant you permission
to taste my chocolate emission
She's so kawaii so I try so hard to make her squee
She's so kawaii can't deny she's the one for me
She's so kawaii in her eyes I see my destiny
Why won't she wake up and notice me
Sou desu ne
Foetid foaming feces
Flatulent farts
Flush.
I might be lactose intolerant
Would you believe
they put a man on the moon, man on the moon?
Could you conceive
there's nothing out there to see and nothing to do?
Jar-Jar Binks
kinda stinks
but give a chance to his
passionate jizz
First, Elon came for the wokes,
And I did not speak out—
For I was not woke.
Then Elon came for the leftists,
And I did not speak out—
For I was not a leftist.
Then Elon came for the Democrats,
And I did not speak out—
For I was not a Democrat.
Then Elon came for the scientists,
And I did not speak out—
For I was not a scientist.
Then Elon came for the gamers,
And there was no one left to speak for me.
Why
Justify
Just try
BURMA SHAVE
Ciao bella, I'm Tomaso, addicted to tobacco
Mi like mi coffè very importante
No time to talk, scusi, my days are very busy
And I just own this little ristorante
Life may give you lemons when dancing with the demons
No stresso, no stresso, no need to be depresso
Mi amore, mi amore
Espresso macchiato, macchiato, macchiato
Por favore, por favore
Espresso macchiato corneo
Mi amorе, mi amore
Espresso macchiato, macchiato, macchiato
Por favore, por favorе
Espresso macchiato
Espresso macchiato
Mi like to fly privati with twenty-four carati
Also mi casa very grandioso
Mi money numeroso, I work around the clocko
That's why I'm sweating like a mafioso
Life is like spaghetti, it's hard until you make it
No stresso, no stresso, it's gonna be espresso
Mi amore, mi amore
Espresso macchiato, macchiato, macchiato
Por favore, por favore
Espresso macchiato
Espresso macchiato
La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la, la-la-la
La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Espresso macchiato
Espresso macchiato
Venus of Urbini
Flicking her beanie
Pose reminiscent of My Little Pony
Don't be a weenie
Fortune be innie
Throw it at Suika, outside be oni
"Say I won't" said the nigga who will