@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Welcome to our Grand Re-Opening.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
@@@@@@@@@@ ____
@@@@@@@ ^:;:;:;:;:MR.
@@@@@@ ./;^@@ R;:',
@@@@@@/;/@__,.Ν€___!___
@@@ @ ,. |/'"L::::|:::::R::::::::::::M"''@€
@@,. ,. ''::::::!:::::::::/|:::::::::i:::::::::::::::::::€:::::R€
@'L ^::::::::::::::::/Ϊ|:::::::::i:::::R€R;:::::_:::::',
@ /:::::::::::::::::::/|:::::i::::::::::|_::::;iMΝ::::::::_i
@,'::::::::/::::::/:/@!;;Κ::::::::|@ _!;;;Κ::::::::::::::R.@@
@i:::::::/!::::::i/§ΓΓ R::::|@ΓΓΓ'!R_:::::::::', Rei, please don't do this to me! I'm your biggest fan!
@!::::/::i::::::::Κ Λ:;:;r@@R!@Λ;:;r! !_::::!ΦΚ@@
@V'! ²i::::::/!:! ""@@@ @ @ ""Dl:::Ν:::!:|
@@ R! R!::|::i>€. @ €,€,@@,.C:::|:::::Ϊi::|
@@@@@ |::|:::|::::::M7:.r--r 7L|:::|::::|::::::::|::|
@@@@@.|::|::::|:::;:CR!__^::::M>.,|::::|:::::::|::|
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Sorry, we're all out of mercy.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S ANTIPATHY@ ==
( E-E) Well hello there young lady! Aren't you a little young to be running your own shop? Can you even legally work at 14? Heh, well, you sure are a hard-working gal. You have my respect.
@@@@@@@@@@Θ__Θ
@@@@@ @@@@ <€MΝL>@@ HEY! THIS ISN'T A WORK PERMIT AT ALL!
@@@@@@@ΑάL]@|@άR THIS IS JUST A NAPKIN WITH A
@@@@@@@ rέ€_ M{ _Q /M( @j@GROCERY LIST WRITTEN ON IT!
@@@@@iO0_LΘΠ · jcΙRMRj
@@@@@@P@ @ Ι~Π~~~~.|@0OjPUT YOUR HANDS UP!
@@@@@@@@@^ RΪL @ | @PGET DOWN ON THE GROUND!
@@@@@@@@/Q@ Φ@ @ _ KEEP YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM!
@@@@@@@@_P¨.@@_@@j.
@@@@@@@@@i__m@@ @|,P/
@@@@@@@ @@@@@ @Rρ)
@@@@@@@@@@Θ__Θ
@@@@@ @@@@ <€MDIVL>@@
@@@@@@@ΑάL]DIVID@άR NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
@@@@@@@ rέ€_DIVIDE B /M( @j@
@@@@@iO0_LΘDIVIDE BY ZEROΙRMRj
@@@@@@P@ @ Ι~Π~~~~.|@0Oj
@@@@@@@@@^ RΪLDIVI@ | @P
@@@@@@@@/DI@ Φ@DIV _
@@@@@@@@_DI¨.@@_DIVj.
@@@@@@@@@iDIm@@ @|,P/
@@@@@@@ @@@@@ @Rρ)
(₯ิ_₯ิ)Α-̾ excuse me may i just loiter in your place of business and reflect upon the vulgarities life
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@No loitering. No littering. No lottery.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S ANTIPASTO@ ==
( LΦ`) That reminds me of the joke about the surfer who tried to
( LΦ`) go to church straight from the beach.
( LΦ`) He was stopped at the door by a stern spinster, who insisted
( LΦ`) "No shoes, no shirt, no services!"
( LΦ`) ... that was the joke.
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@It seems like a reasonable policy to stop half naked people from entering the premises.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S SERIOUS@ ==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§ Φ ! i@HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S LECTURE@ ==
( ί ί) So Rei, when Rebuild comes out on DVD, why don't you celebrate by actually having things people want here?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@I might have some orange juice...or orange-like drink.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S TANG@ ==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@But that's then and this is now.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S NOTHING@ ==
@ ^ζζ_
../ζζζ_
/ζ,iEjiEj|
|ζζ^@@ @_|
|ζ /@@O@|@O@|@@
|ζ |@@@Q_|Q_ @|@@@Oh yeah? Well I've got some right now! Come one come all!
_|@@@_Q/@^@@@@LCL for everyone! You'll even get a free Marty's cup with fun puzzles on it!
@ _QQQ_^
@ @ / _ΙT@@@@
@@/__i |£!|@@@
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@@@@ Marty's@@@@@@ ==
«π Θ½©gA»gCB
@@@-]]- A
^@ζζζR
!ζ!@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
iζ§-]ζ|! i@Iζζζ TANASINN
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ /ζΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ===ζζζζζ=ζζ=
==@@ζζ REI'S NζHING@ ==
ζ
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@I really like Mittens stopping by.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S PENIS@@@@==
( ί ί) Me too!
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@In that case, I retract my previous statement.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S VAGINA@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@... You still havn't left...
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S BABY @@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Call security.
_R .U@- Ιm @SECURITY! Please show this customer the door!
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S POLICE STATE@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Poor, poor security kitten. You try so hard.
_R .U@- Ιm But, you'd think with such a massive budget...
@@MMt@iL Nerv could get me something better.
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S STRIKE@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@
_R .U@- Ιm @...
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Sorry, we only sell donuts in groups of 999999+
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
Disappear.
This door is an eyesore.
This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door. This door!
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Go through the door and never come back then.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DOOR@@@@==
Cellar door?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Sorry, but our wicked awesome door isn't for sale.
_R .U@- Ιm @However, for 3 easy payments of $99.99, you may pass through it. Once.
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DOOR@@@@==
@ ^ζζ_
../ζζζ_
/ζ,iEjiEj|
|ζζ^@@ @_|
|ζ /@@O@|@O@|@@
|ζ |@@@Q_|Q_ @|@@@I've been through that door once!
_|@@@_Q/@^@@@@Kinda smelly though.
@ _QQQ_^
@ @ / _ΙT@@@@
@@/__i |£!|@@@
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@@@@ Marty's@@@@@@ ==
(@₯ิΦ₯ิ) Or into the oven. Kids who don't know the difference between sodomy and getting roasted alive should ask their parents or a trusted adult for more information.
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@ It's okay, I made the offer in jest.
_R .U@- Ιm @ We all know Marty wouldn't want to go through that door...UNLESS IT BELONGED TO A GUY!
@@MMt@iL@@@@Zing!
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S TRICKERY@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Unlike boys, we're self-cleaning.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
( E-E) However, tanasinn is incapable of making your sentences read any less awkwardly.
( ί -ί) Nya...
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ@Mittens...
`(,_Ι
ζζζζζζζζQQQQ
@ζζζζζζζζζ_@@@ζζζ
@ζζζζζζζζζ_@@@ζζζζζζ
ζζζζζζζζ,iEjiEj|@ζζ
ζζζζζζζζζ^@@ @_|@@ζζζ
ζζζζζζζ /@@O@|@O@|@ζζζthaζdosζtζ
@ζζζζζζζ |@@@Q_|Q_ @@|ζζ@yoζaskζdζfoζζζ
@ζζζζζζζ@@@_Q/@^ζζζζζζζζζζζζζζ
@ζζζζζζζQQQ_^ζζζζl
ζζζζζζζζζ _ΙΒζζζζζζζζζ(ζE-)heyζaghζfck
ζζζζζζζζ__i |£!|ζζζζζζζζζ
ζζζζζζζͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ=========ζζζζζζζζζ
ζζζζζζζ==@@@@@@ Marty's@@@@@@ ==ζζ
ζζζζζζζζζζζζ
(ζί) Ee hee he thζt tiζkles!
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ@Please tanasinn outside~nya.
`(,_Ι
Hi! I am a reporter and I would like to interview the manager! You have been nominated to be one of the best restaurants in the city! :D :D :D :D
@@@@l@@@@@
@@@iQ_j@@@@
@@ iQQj@@@
@@i QQ j@@@@
@@i@EΝEj@ < My name is Squeeks and despite the unsanitary uniforms, our service is unrivalled.
@ @ / _ΙT@@@@
@@/__i |£!|@@@
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ=======
==@@@@@@ Squeeks'@@@ @ ==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Hey >>326, buzz off. They were talking to me.
_R .U@- Ιm @As for you, reporter, I will do you the favor of accepting the nomination
@@MMt@iL on the condition that you purchase 500 kid's meals in the next 10 seconds.
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Too late. What's that, reporter? You're a cheapskate
_R .U@- Ιm @who only cares about ratings? So be it.
@@MMt@iL I'll continue fulfilling the dream I've held throughout the
@ @ / _ΙT 14 long years of my life: to own the worst restaurant in the world.
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI HAS A DREAM@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@I can't remember what we serve here.
_R .U@- Ιm
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
( E-E) Bitter resentment?
Reporter again, I'm sorry I had to go to the GAZA strip. You guys should open up a place there. Anyway, I'll buy 1,000 kid meals for a interview
@@Φ-Ν
@ ΠL°MΠ@Ba-Dum! *crash
`(,_Ι
That's it I am going to go interview Asuka's. She has such good german food.
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Sorry, Asuka and I are actually good friends.
_R .U@- Ιm@Asuka's has recently been bought by The Rei's Diner.
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S MONOPOLY@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@We are, however, selling Asuka.
_R .U@- Ιm@It's a limited time offer, so BUY! BUY! Buy.
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@THE REI'S MONOPOLY@==
( E-E) I detect some anti-competitive practices here.
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Absolutely not, it is for the good of the consumer.
_R .U@- Ιm@I don't want to hear any more conspiracy theories.
@@MMt@iL They support the terrorists. I mean Angels.
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@THE REI'S POLICE STATE 2: THE TAKEOVER@==
( E-E) so... Terrorists are Angels?
( EΝE) No, Angels are terrorists - we are thus doomed...
( EΝE) Actually, forget the angel terrorists, I want some Asuka! How much?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@She's cheap.
_R .U@- Ιm@$5 for 1 hour...of her hilarious comedy routine.
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@THE REI'S @==
( EΝE) I don't like her comedy routine. If i wanted to get dressed down in front of an audience, I'd stand naked in a glass box on the street.
( LΦ`) Oh ho! In my day we had to pay good money for something similar! I still run out of my pention money by the third week...
( EΝE) What about the 'other' routine?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Our floor is too dirty for tap dancing.
_R .U@- Ιm@Sorry.
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@THE REI'S ASSORTED SERVICES@==
( EΝE) fine, just have her be my waitress then.
@@@@@@@ ,,,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,,,
@@@@_ @@;;'VV^VV;;;;i Sorry, Asuka is home sick today.
.@@@@@ @@l;;;! @ !;;l@@@I will be your waitress instead!
@@@@Ό€_l;;;,,@‘’ ,;i;;@@
@@@@@@_;;J°. @'C°;[€
@@@@@@ @V`/ !€_,! i€]Ϊ[€
@@@@@@@@@ !@ν@
@@@@@@@@ @@@@@
( EΝE) fine FINE. Osaka, I'd like your finest meal stuff with your second finest. STOP STARING INTO SPACE AND LISTEN TO ME!!
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@We're all out of the Bonkler Special.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@It's so popular we can't keep the ingredients in stock.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@We'd normally have it, but today, the van broke down.
_R .U@- Ιm @
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S DINER@@@@==
( EΝE) (sigh)...do you have ANYTHING?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@I microwaved a slice of swiss cheese to it.
_R .U@- Ιm
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!| ∼Ό½⊱
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE RAT'S DINER@@@@==
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@I also put a raisin in its mouth.
_R .U@- Ιm
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!| ∼Ό½⊱
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE RAT'S DINER@@@@==
( EΝE) Can I have it in a bun?
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@We just have these low-carb wraps.
_R .U@- Ιm
@@MMt@iL
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!| ∼Ό½⊱
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE RAT'S DINER@@@@==
( EΝE) But then you'll never know if it's going to run!
@@@@ Ό½
@@@@ ΘΘ Ώ
@@@ ( EΦE)/@
@@@Ό@@ Ι@@@Bye, I was Clonepa! The rat tasted swell!
@@@@(Β Ι
@@@@ (m
@@@-]]- A
^@@@@@R
!@ !@l|,.iΙl_Ιj
i @§-]@|! i@Thank you for your patronage. As they say in Germany,
_R .U@- Ιm "Ich liebe, Scheiße zu essen!"
@@MMt@iL Asuka taught me that one.
@ @ / _ΙT
@@/__i |£!|
ͺͺΒͺΒͺͺ========
==@@@THE REI'S KLAN@@@@==
( EΝE) NOM NOM NOM
( EΝE) Wait a sec, this isn't chocolate! It's Scheiße!
( EΝE) NOM NOM NOM NOM
( EΝE) VIETNOM NOM NOM