>>797 Once in Higher Maths the girl who sat in front of me said "hey look at this" and typed 5318008 on it and showed me, and I was like "um okay" but then she turned it upside down and, well, try it yourself! I had a giggle.
>>799 Turn around and put your hands behind your back on the keyboard, and type your whole post like that.
>>799
800 GET.
I totally cheated and waited until I was alone. So I yelled it but the rain just kept on raining and the computer kept on quietly humming and nothing changes which is my problem in the first place.
>>801
I demand you give somebody a present! And tell us what it was! It can be small or big, something you made or something you bought. But it can't be something you were already planning to give away.
>>800
I noticed earlier today in an email from Steam that the game "The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion" was on sale. I'd been notified because it was in my wishlist. I decided to buy it, but instead of using it myself I gifted it to a friend who is a huge LOTR fan. Hopefully he'll enjoy it.
>>802
I deemed you hurry up and post in this thread! It's almost died several times now.
>>802
What role did religions play in relations of Europe and Middle East during the Middle Ages? Compare it to the events of contemporary history.
>>804
Answer this, or you shall face execution by being bored to death with history books. And don't you dare to cheat by secretly opening Wikipedia on your phone! I wrote related articles, and they are all wrong.
>>803
Disclaimer: I have not studied history in many, many years. Furthermore, as per the demand, I have not looked at Wikipedia or anything like that. Here goes nothing.
During the Middle Ages, Western Europe was almost entirely Christian, whilst the Middle East was mostly Muslim. There was probably a smattering of Judaism in Eastern Europe as well. The crusades, a set of religiously motivated wars between Europe and the Middle East, occurred around this time (I think). There was also the endless and completely pointless conflicts in England over Catholicism and Protestantism. Thus, differences in religion caused conflicts.
In contemporary history, Europe has become more cosmopolitan, with members of many different religions coexisting. Furthermore, atheism is at an all time high, and people's attitudes to, for instance, converting from one religion to another, are extremely lenient when compared to the Middle Ages, showing that religion is not as important as it was. The Middle East is still almost entirely Muslim.
The most notable war involving Europe and the Middle East in modern times is still ongoing, so I'm not sure if it even counts as "history" yet. At any rate, the Middle Eastern side largely claims to be religiously motivated, whereas the European side has no religious aspect whatsoever.
>>805
I demand that you find your nearest living being and lick it.
>>804
I was going to weasel out of this by licking my arm and writing that it's slightly salty, but then my cat jumped on my knees. So I liked its neck. It had a neutral taste, my mouth is full of fur, and I got a scornful glance in return. The one that cats usually give to overly excited dogs in youtube videos.
>>806
Find a way to write your response and demand whilst being upside down. Describe how you did it and how it felt.
>>804
I licked my girlfriend after reading this a few days ago but never replied to this thread due to sex.
>>805
I'm lying on a couch writing upside down with my phone. I feel dizzy and silly.
>>807
I demand you revive this thread with a question or advice or both!
http://4-ch.net/love/kareha.pl/1326265053/l50
For SAoVQ's >>280, the rabbits are a symbol of promiscuity and fertility. >>280 has a lot of pent-up sexual energy but deep in his heart of hearts, >>280 knows the cold earth will soak up all of that sexual energy when >>280 grows old and dies, buried with his virginity.
>>810 I demand that you get this party started
>>811
http://keatscollective.bandcamp.com/track/strawberry-lemonade
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1F7vwcIN04
http://cs8.s140.coreserver.jp/tai/maru71/01%20i%20want%20you.mp3
https://soundcloud.com/ticklishofficial/rescue-me
https://soundcloud.com/t_e_c_h_n_o_m_a_n/techno_2_masterd-wav
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAvNNNEs0Ao
I could keep going but I'll stop there.
>>813
I demand you listen to my PARTY MIX, listening to each song for at least 1 minute, and write your impressions!
>>812
i don't think any of these (except maybe for the first one) are really suitable for a party other than a BOOM BOOM RAVE BOOM BOOM BOOM DRUGS LOL BOOM BOOM BOOM
i particurlarly liked strawberry lemonade and rescue me
>>814
link a picture of yourself doing weird things (you may black your face out if you don't trust DQN (hint: you shouldn't (LOL PAREN NESTING)))
Done and done!
>>816 Wear two different flavours of deodorant at the same time, every day for a week.
>>816
That implies an objective measure of beauty, but beauty is in the eye of the DQN. I find a wide variety of things beautiful, from abstract geometric cityscapes (http://cargocollective.com/atelierolschinsky/STRUCTURES-V) to glacier volcanoes (http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2733/4490423858_98cba8bf85_z.jpg). It depends on my mood. Other people, I'm sure, have their own ideas.
So, I think the most beautiful world is one where we would live as consciousnesses in a vast net with the possibility to create and inhabit any possible world. A world made by and for artists. You could visit the abstract world of Dali until you grew tired of the melting clocks and moved to a peaceful mountain meadow populated by lesbian catgirls. Of course there's the problem of beauty unable to truly shine without ugliness for comparison, so there would be a small handful of malicious denizens that found beauty in trolling, spreading guro and goatse around people's idyllic pastures.
>>818
Imagine the ugliest world possible, and tell me all about it.
>>817
Your world sounds a little like the Metamorphosis of Prime Intelligence. If you haven't already, give it a read.
My ugliest world is a sand field. The sand is dirty. You can barely see the surface of the ground because it's covered in rotting wood and rusted metal. The only lodging is trailers, and the trailers are dusty and filled with spiders. They're filled with coupons from 1998 and empty bottles of Gatorade. The only work is lifting and rearranging to rotting wood and rusted metal. It smells like dust everywhere. The only entertainment is MTV.
>>819
Take a thousand dollars out of your bank account and spend it on a fancy watch.
>>819
http://minecraft.net/classic/list
Choose solidus server deaths, it's my server I built it from a poweredge 4600 and a dimension 5000
>>821
Set up a proper network of virtual machines to represent an internet: RNS, DNS, router, client, server, and NSA logging machine.
http://i.imgur.com/qs2AFrV.jpg
I demand that you find me an interesting and relatively obscure website to look at
>>823
http://www.ibiblio.org/lifepatterns/
>>825
I demand that you edit a Wikipedia article, somehow including the word "superstructure". Bonus points if it's an actually helpful edit.
>>824
http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Very_Important_Person&oldid=597671767
I doubt it will stay there.
>>826
http://opaltapes.bandcamp.com/track/melting
I demand you listen to this track and write a review.
>>834
22:42 The Elitist Superstructure of DQN @ 4-ch
4-ch.net
22:38 GUNSHOW ARCHIVE
gunshowcomic.com
22:38 Gunshow - Dogs Rule
gunshowcomic.com
22:38 Gunshow - Cool Frog and Dolphin
gunshowcomic.com
22:37 don't get mad at video games - Google Search
encrypted.google.com
22:37 Cheap Arduino Module kits & Single-Chip Microcomputer Diy Supplies for Sale - DX
www.dx.com
22:09 Monotora - Battlelog / Battlefield 4
battlelog.battlefield.com
22:09 2835825_570_321.jpg (570×321)
sverigesradio.se
22:08 Battlelog / Battlefield 4
battlelog.battlefield.com
22:08 Welcome - Nectarine Demoscene Radio
www.scenemusic.net
>>835
I demand that you show us what is in your drawer.
>>836
Another day, another dance, another dead guy. I cantered about the stage, twirling an elegant fan. The small audience cared not for these aesthetic trappings.
"Just get him out here already!" a burly man shouted.
"Quiet, it's only going to take longer if you interrupt her," his smaller man bespectacled companion whispered angrily. I nodded silently. I was as bored as they were, but if I didn't do the dance right, nothing would happen.
After a few more minutes of whirling about, I finally felt the heaving in my chest. I froze and dropped my fan, then my whole body slumped down like a puppet. Somebody else raised my head back up.
"Who summons me?" a deep voice demanded through my mouth.
"Tell us where the money is!" the burly man shouted, "or we'll kill your family!"
"You dare disturb the afterlife to make empty threats?!" I boomed in a terrifyingly deep voice. "The idle matters of the living mean nothing to me."
The smaller companion with glasses was unimpressed. He stepped forward to speak.
"Come on, Kenta. If it means nothing to you, why don't you just tell us what you did with the money? Then we can all rest in peace. Ha."
"You fool, money is as meaningless as life itself! Why should I remember such an insignificant detail?" I shouted back.
"I was afraid it might come to this," Glasses sighed. He snapped his fingers. Two grunts jumped forward. Before I could react they had pounced on me. They pinned me to thr ground and tied my hands and legs together.
"These are soul-binding ropes, Kenta," Glasses said, pacing evilly around my helpless body. "You can't leave this poor little miko's body until I untie her. And everything she feels, you will feel. Gongon? The knife?"
The burly guy stepped forward with an evil grin. He took out a knife and licked his lips.
"Hey dead guy," I whispered inside my own head, "leave this to me." I began rapidly chanting a ritual under my breath. The wretched gangster was getting closer. I concentrated as hard as a I could and finished the spell just as he was about to slice apart my expensive hakama. Suddenly I was engulfed in holy flames. The fire exploded outwards, burning the ropes and blasting the gangsters to the ground. I took advantage of the confusion to make a mad dash for the mountains.
After running long enough to be sure they hadn't followed me, I stopped to catch my breath.
"Phew, that was a close one," I said. "I should have known not to take a possession request from the yakuza. But they paid me so well!"
"I thought maidens were above material needs," chided Kenta, the dead man in my body. I blushed at suddenly feeling my mouth move on its own.
"Hey! You don't need to talk with my mouth, just speak to me in my head!" I scolded.
"Like it or not, we're sharing this body now," Kenta said back, still using my mouth. "Since you burned the soulbinding ropes with holy fire, we're stuck together."
"EHHHHHH!??!?" my cry of shock pierced the forest. The camera sharply panned out, and a flock of birds flew out of the trees.
"Be quiet, they'll find us!" Kenta said through me.
"You're the one using my mouth still!"
"I know, it just feels too weird...too intimate," he said, blushing.
"You didn't seem so shy when you were in scary-ghost mode!"
"Yeah, well, I was fresh out of the afterlife. Now that I've spent a few minutes inside a mortal, my old personality is returning," Kenta explained.
"Well anyway, I can't live like this!" I exclaimed. "Now hurry up and get out of my body! Out out out! Come on!"
"I wish I could! Isn't there a dance or something you can do?"
"I haven't learned such a high-level dance!" I protested. "I usually just do quick 1-minute possessions so I can help the departed's family have peace of mind...and make a bit of cash!"
"Well, you better learn how to get us apart before we have to take a bath together. Ha ha!" Kenta joked. I blushed furiously and slapped myself in the cheek.
"Stupid pervert!" I shouted. "OUCH!" we cried together.
(1/2)
After an hour of hiking, we came to a long stone staircase that led to a magnificent shrine.
"This is Rakuhei Shrine," I said, as we climbed the steps. "My friend Haruka Rakuhei lives here. She's a really good miko. She taught me that fire spell for self-protection! I'm sure she'll know a way out of this predicament."
We stepped through the torii gate at the top, and Haruka came running out of the main shrine to meet me. She was stunningly beautiful as usual.
"Oh Kanae, I'm so glad you're safe!" she said, embracing me. "I sensed the fire spell earlier. What happened?"
"Er...hi, I guess," Kenta said through my voice. "Nice to meet you, I'm Takahiro Kenta. I got mixed up in some...uh...nasty business, and ended up dead..."
"Some yakuza made me summon this pervert," I interrupted, "and now he's stuck in my body! Hurry up and get him out already!"
Haruka just laughed.
"Nice to meet you, Kenta. How does it feel to be in such a sexy young body?"
We blushed a deep crimson red. "Haruka! Don't say such weird things!"
---
"Once two souls have been bound together by cursed rope, the only way to separate them is by untying or cutting the rope," Haruka said, reading from an ancient scroll. We were sitting on the floor of the shrine library. "But this doesn't say anything about burning it with holy fire."
"How are we supposed to untie the rope when it's gone!" I demanded.
"Hold on. This next scroll mentions an emergency ritual for splitting two souls. But it can only be performed with a special fan from Gentokyo."
"Gentokyo? But isn't that where the yokai live?"
"Yep!" Haruka seemed way too excited.
"But that's dangerous! We'll be eaten!"
"Haha, don't worry! Kenta will be with you," Haruka teased.
"H-hey, I don't know how to fight Yokai, I'm just a ghost!" Kenta protested.
"So it's decided, we'll leave for Gentokyo first thing tomorrow morning!" Haruka said cheerfully.
"You're not listening!!" Kenta and I chorused together.
---
to be continued?
>>839
I demand you write a short fan fiction about my short story.
>>839
A+. Reading this fanfic was a truly profound, life changing experience, on a par with a native American spirit journey or taking LSD. The text conveys its message with startling precision and insight, concisely and unpretentiously, without obfuscatory language. The short length leaves the reader with a sense of wonder at what goes unsaid - the author may directly ask only one question, but the reader is left with countless more. Ultimately, the text is a demonstration of Absurdist philosophy, challenging the idea that a story must have a moral, point, or meaning at all. This idea, that the author need not pander to the reader's every vagary, is sure to usher in a new age of literature. My favourite part is the crippling sense of existential dread the reader is left with after reading.
>>841
I demand that you spend at least ten minutes reading about a topic you know absolutely nothing about and post what you learned.
>>840
I chose the wikipedia article on phylogenetics. It looks like phylogenetics is a discipline more or less defined by the use of relatively complicated math to study the evolutionary tree of life. Supposedly there's Bayesian inference and stuff. The NSF funds a lot of this. There's a specific (ongoing) project devoted to just red algae, called RedToL. There's a big sequence database called GenBank, run by the National Center for Biotechnology Information, part of the NIH. Also, taxonomy is somewhat distinct from modern phylogenetics. Cladistics is a branch of taxonomy trying to bring taxonomy into line with phylogenetics, and phenetics is a branch of taxonomy that ignores phylogenetics entirely. It looks like phenetics is on the way out, although neighbour joining is still relevant.
>>842
I demand that you shave your legs and describe how it makes you feel.
>>842
Done! http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1288889234/52
>>844
I demand you message "I love you" to the next person who contacts you via email, IM, or text.
>>847
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKxarMc1_Kk
Isn't she sweet?
>>849
I demand that you bump at least one high quality old thread that you think deserves it.
>>850
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1514125464/
>>852
I demand that you list every present you receive for Christmas and give each of them marks out of ten.
Overall average: 7.75/10
>>853
I demand that you post something interesting in the /img/ image sharing thread.
>>855
I'm not posting with it in my ass because it became too uncomfortable, so I'll describe it from recent memory. It was slightly arousing to say the least and not a feeling I've felt before. Anyway, there's only so much you can say about such a thing.
>>857
I demand you make a throwaway account on a random forum, make a completely off topic thread and post the results here
however esoteric or weird is up to you
>>856
Hurry before it's deleted
https://www.bbq-brethren.com/forum/showthread.php?p=3929521#post3929521
>>858
I demand that you give me an interesting topic to research in depth.
>>858
Well, I wasn't able to read >>857's research on eproctophilia because he or she hasn't posted it yet (as far as I know.) However, I did read >>857's thread on BBQ Brethren. This was more difficult than I expected as I had to make an account and wait a few days to get approved just to read it.
>>857's thread and subsequent responses was mildly humorous but I read it all without laughing, so I'll consider that demand fulfilled.
>>860
I demand you post at least 100 times in the thread "[COUNTDOWN] >>900 ON THE 9000TH DAY OF THIS GLORIOUS MONTH".
>>860
One of my favorite text adventures is Slouching Towards Bedlam (http://ifdb.tads.org/viewgame?id=032krqe6bjn5au78) but you might already know about that. I also recently enjoyed A Dark Room (http://adarkroom.doublespeakgames.com).
A slightly more obscure text adventure that I highly recommend is Mastaba Snoopy (https://debacle.us/mastabasnoopy/). Oh, and Tower of the Blood Lord is pretty good too. (http://correlatedcontents.com/misc/Tower.html)
>>862
I demand you play one or more of the above games and write a short review here.
>>861
Mastaba Snoopy is both hilarious and horrifying. It is a clever amalgamation of weird Lovecraftian body horror and Snoopy.
If you think about it, the formula is not that difficult, and one that has been executed many times: take an innocent pop culture product which is overly mass-marketed (Snoopy, Garfield, Shrek, Minions, etc.) and transform it in a strange and horrifying manner.
Even if this concept is not exactly original, Mastaba Snoopy does a pretty good job of execution. One complaint is that the introduction is unnecessary, rather than providing an explanation for this Peanuts hell-world, I wish the game would just drop you into it without any explanation.
However, besides the lame introduction Mastaba Snoopy has pretty solid and entertaining writing. It is neither overbearing nor underbearing -- it is long enough to entertain but doesn't overstay its welcome. I think Twine is a great format for this style of writing, as the labyrinthine dialogue trees match the twisty maze of the Snoopy hell world. I'd love to see more text adventures like it.
Overall I'd rate Mastaba Snoopy 4 out of 5 Peppermint Patties.
>>863
I demand you post a screenshot of your bookmarks folder.
>>862
https://i.imgur.com/i543t6W.jpg
I hope this is satisfactory.
>>864
I demand you find me some interesting older threads to read through!
>>863
Please enjoy this selection of treasures from the Golden Age of DQN.
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1310158763/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1266462475/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1268174692/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1326488419/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1341413503/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1142123105/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1360180067/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1333120510/
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1314324451/
>>865
I demand to know your middle name. If you do not have a middle name, I demand to know what you wish your middle name was.
>>867 I sang >>75's nursery rhyme with my glockenspiel in a church https://www.mediafire.com/file/6f7f0gnkdh5g6uw/Praise_The_Apple.mp3/file
>>868 I demand that you send a cheerful message to a friend you haven't spoke to in a while.
>>869 Oh yeah I did this the other day and forgot to tell you https://4-ch.net/img/res/1723.html#2886
>>871 Now you have to tell us a good joke.
>>870 A wee boy and his dad are in the bath.
The boy goes “Dad what do you call this bit?” and points at his earlobes
Dad replied "They call that your earlobe cos it's the lobe on your ear!"
The boy points at his eyelashes and blinks a few times and says “Dad what are these called?”
Dad said "They call them your eyelashes cos they're the lashes on your eye!"
The boy points at his belly button and says “Dad what do you call this bit?”
Dad said "They call that your belly button cos it's the button on your belly!"
The boy said "hmmm" went to push his belly button…
Dad went "NOOOOO!" and lunged towards him…
But he was too late… the boy exploded
>>872 I demand you stick your finger in your belly button and give it a proper good wiggle
>>872
Unfortunately I can't help you with that (maybe some other kind soul will compose something for you, or maybe I'll remember it in a few years), but I can give you a zip file of all the imgur uploads in this thread, in light of the fact that imgur is planning to remove old anonymous uploads: https://files.catbox.moe/ieakgq.zip
>>874
I demand an interesting thread idea!
>>879
Maybe not the worst but perhaps the most "cringe":
https://files.catbox.moe/988duo.PNG
This one is pretty bad:
https://files.catbox.moe/f47yw5.PNG
I demand that >>881 post the thumbnail from their youtube recommendations which has the smallest view count.
>>880
https://4-ch.net/img/src/1683879563092.png
>>882
I demand to know your score on this test: https://theinnocencetest.com/
>>884
140.15
>>886
I demand to know your results on this test: https://bdsmtest.org/
>>885
http://bdsmtest.org/r/PDGJagKz
Half the questions imply I have any experience in the bedroom or with a partner so most of my answers were neutral. Sorry for ruining your fun. (I'm not actually sorry)
>>887
I demand you shuffle up a TCG deck and tell me what you topdeck.
>>886 I got this one https://www.tcgplayer.com/product/84909/pokemon-wotc-promo-dragonite-movie-promo?Language=English
>>888 I demand you do a headstand against a wall for as long as you can and tell us how long you were upside down for
>>888
The best anime of 1996, without any doubt, is Evangelion. Not only is the plot amazing, it delivers important themes about society and has a lot of symbols about religion. Pisses me off that people don't understand how beautiful this anime is and I just want to punch them in the face.
>>888
I think you should watch Famous Dog Lassie. I've never seen it and have no idea if it's any good or not, but I've heard good things about World Masterpiece Theater anime and 1996 didn't have a whole let else going on that I could see.
>>891
I demand you recommend me an anime from between 2000 and 2005.
>>891
https://www.nintendo.co.jp/n01/n64/software/zelda/
I'm afraid it only has one Link, but it is from 1998!
>>893
I demand you tell me about your most beloved childhood stuffed toy (and maybe even post a picture).
>>892 Starting from before I was forming coherent memories, I carried around a teddy bear which was, for some reason, orange, with brown footpads, muzzle, and inside of ears. I called it "Cheesebear". For a time, I was quite obsessed with Calvin & Hobbes, though it was not in our newspaper and instead I simply read it out of anthologies of it we had on our living room boomshelf, and I imagined Cheesebear in much the same way as Calvin imagined Hobbes. I still have it, sitting in my attic, overlooking the stairs, but I'm not home at the moment and cannot snap a picture.
>>894 I demand that you draw your favorite non-dinosaur fossil creature. A simple MSpaint doodle with your mouse will do; don't worry about it looking particularly good.
>>893
https://4-ch.net/img/src/1686666508463.png
I have nothing but love for my girl hallucigenia. What an absolute freak.
>>895
Fuck, marry, kill: Beady Eyes, Clonepa, Grandpa. I demand your answer with full reasoning.
I scored 83, I thought I was a bad guy, but I checked only 23 statements out of 100 so there is a problem with the scoring. For double sure I checked this and got 23 means I am pure https://drdeenz.com/rice-purity-test/
