In the beginning I am running in the forest naked as fast as I can, as if I'm escaping from something. I encounter big swarms of aggressive bees recklessly stinging me on the road but it doesn't stop me. Then I get to a branch and realize that all but one of the stings were actually nails. Strangely, those nails are actually reversed, pointing up with the head inside my skin.
Suddenly, an empty cinema room. I'm standing there, examining the only one of those stings that isn't a nail, and vomitting on it in order to neutralize the poison. The nails are expulsed out of my skin, the scars and the vomit disappear, I take a seat, and people start getting inside the room.
The film starts, and I know even before its beginning it's a sequel to a show I really like (Kaamelott). But that film is fucking terrible, and the only scene I remember is some guy running ejecting nails out of his skin.
Suddenly, I'm in a medieval Europe-styled market next to the forest and a railroad. Someone is with me and goes on the railroad. I tell that person what ey's doing is dangerous and ey comes back. I look at an arcade game in the market and decide to play it. The screen shows a cylindric tower slightly to the left in front of a blue sky with a few clouds, and there are ghosts with their tongues out represented exactly by the same sprite as in the Touhou games for PC-98.
And then I wake up.
I went with my father to the top of a very tall hotel building. I had heard rumours of cultish activity, which would explain the cheap room rates, but I had never taken it seriously.
We received some kind of weird electrical device that seemed like a Lenovo tablet, but seemingly with custom firmware. We ended up at some kind of cult meeting and my dad looked suddenly brainwashed. I thought there must be something in the air, or some kind of electric signal from the device.
Fortunately I was immune, so I hurried back to my room to try to hack the device, but I found there was an alarm system on it and I was worried the alarm would go off and the cult would find and kill me. I was about to go online and post asking for help on 4-ch but suddenly my dad was there along with a sinister young man repeatedly sticking a needle into my forehead and saying, "Tranquilizer. Tranquilizer. Tranquilizer." Every time he said it I got sleepier and sleepier...at first I struggled, but then thinking quick, I pretended to be totally knocked out, letting my body go completely limp, and he stopped stabbing me.
I lost consciousness for a bit, but soon regained consciousness earlier than they had probably intended. I was in a room with a mirror in front of me. I could see in the mirror that nobody was immediately behind me, but I could hear a man talking in the next room. I looked around for weapons and decided on a large heavy flower pot. There was another man like me in the room helping me for some reason at this point, so he took the pot and went into the next room to smash our captor over the head, giving me a chance to escape.
Things didn't go as planned. The man came into the room, and instead of smashing him over the head, my partner in crime just tackled him to the ground, seeming too scared to actually kill him. So I grabbed a pair of scissors and slit the captor's throat. He continued to talk about cult stuff in disgusting gurgles even as blood, bile and his stomach contents squirted out of his neck hole.
"Oh god, now I've done it," I thought, then I woke up.
I dreamed that I was in Australia and I was trying to establish a city. I wanted to name the city Salzburg just so I could get people to confuse Austria and Australia.
I dreamed that I worked for one of the television news channels. I was investigating to see if cram schools and private schools led to premature death or becoming a mental hospital patient.
I'm late to work because I was having this fucking awesome flying dream at a seaside resort on another planet and kept dropping back into sleep to enjoy it.
Some scientists, one of whom sounded like Liam Neeson, took over my top floor studio apartment to test some high tech ant killing gear. I found out about the experiment when walking up there with a chicken Caesar's salad. They rudely grabbed my salad and spread it all over the floor as bait, and, as if on cue, ants poured out of cracks and holes in the wall and rapidly flooded the place. As I booked out of there, they were flying little toy RC drones around with tiny freezing gas guns blasting away at the rivers of ants on the walls and floors.
I dreamed that I was playing F-Zero for the SNES, but it was next to impossible.
I was then told that the guys who created Kaizo Mario ROM hacks decided to start hacking other SNES/SFC games.
I was with a friend and my boss and we were driving to my friend's two story house. In the house, my boss went to a small back room where the flooring was gone and there was just concrete and various industrial trash. My boss then began telling us how him and some people from his past had put 30 grams of marijuana into a single brownie. My friend asked if my boss could get him some brownies. My boss looked offended and said no. I gave my friend a nudge to indicate I could hook him up. And my boss winked at me to show he knew what i was up to. We left and my boss became a robot girl at some point. She was taking commands while my friend was driving. I told her to imagine Barack Obama fingering his anus. She sat there in silence supposedly imagining it, so I told her to express how horny it made her. Then she began to moan very loudly, so I told her tone it down and begin describing what she was thinking.
I was getting prepared for an elaborate and time-consuming Coming of Age ceremony that had an oddly 50's Americana quality to it. There was choral singing, match making and a formal dance involved. While two fairly mousy girls were suiting me up in a garishly colored tuxedo and tacky jewelry, I flipped out, ran out of the building and jumped on a flying motorcycle and blew the fuck out of there, but not before grabbing a bulky, overly elaborate wind instrument that looked like several different-sized saxophones welded together. Flying police motorcycles were chasing me and then I woke up.
A lot of stuff happened, but all I can remember is that me and my mother were sitting at one of those small café patio tables drinking wine and I was explaining the significance of the number four in Chinese culture to her.
I remember encountering Alex Jones. I told him that people who build mind control machines have heard of tinfoil hats for many years. Their solution was to build a machine that uses tinfoil hats as an amplifier, much lite a satellite dish.
I also remember jokes about making hats out of copper because tin and aluminum have already become too common.
I was recording a short video at the beach with two other friends of mine. One was holding a piece of plywood with a picture of Noriaki Kakyoin drawn onto it by a five year old. The other one was humming part of the soundtrack for Stardust Crusaders. I dunked my left forearm in paint and started to record myself punching a hole through the plywood plank while screaming KORE GA ZA WARUDO DA
Then I woke up.
I wanna make that video now.
I went out to dinner at a pizzeria with MC Ride as the head chef. People kept asking about their meals and he would poke his head out and rap a response.
In the dream, I was trying to remember the details of another dream where I had to clone myself and apparently harvest the clone for spare parts so I could go on living, but I had to hide the clone from everyone since cloning was illegal, so I'm wandering around with my clone in a duffel bag and in the dream I kept flipping between that never happened and when did I do that and I asked somebody in the bus station if anybody had won the powerball yet and woke up.
I was reading an illustrated picture book version of Lolita. I happened to open the book at a part where the protagonist convinces Dolores to ride a bicycle in the nude.
I dreamed that humans went through metamorphosis, and the first stage was a tiny red buglike thing. A relative came to visit me with her newborn bug baby. While she was in another room I dropped it and couldn't find it.
My coffee filter had shrunk.
I was in the passenger seat of a car and my mother was driving, she was on her cell phone arguing with my grandmother because her and my grandfather (who is dead but I guess he was alive in my dream) wanted to move to Guatemala and become tomato farmers. My mother kept telling my grandmother (who is 75) that since she was pregnant she had to think of the baby. I was trying to tune them out and look out the window, but every time I looked up I saw Ron Paul waiting to cross the street, wearing a military dress uniform and holding an American flag folded into a triangle (like they give to the families of dead military veterans) and looking really despondent.
I was eating my (non-narcotic) medications like candy, on accident. I'd forget whether I'd taken one for the day when I went to the bathroom. Then because they taste slightly nice (true irl) and I don't have any candy in the house (also true irl) I'd just take another one and chew it up and eat it (ordinarily one would swallow without chewing).
I don't wanna spend money on candy still though.
A Latvian woman was telling me a joke:
A grandma is hanging out with her kids and counting: "97, 98, 99, 1, 2, 3, 3, 3, 3, 3..."
One of the kids goes: "Grandma, why did you stop counting up?"
And grandma goes, "Well, I'm not playing a fucking gig!!"
It was funny in my dream.
>>91 Brilliant, I hope you don't mind if I tell that joke at parties!
Brenden Fraser was a slave of Robin Williams who controlled Brendan with a knife that has red energy coming from it. Brendan had had enough and got his own non magical knife and attacked Robin. They were around a large tree that Robin Williams was hiding behind. Brendan stabbed Robin's knife from around the tree which drained all the magic powers. Brendan used his newly gained powers to cause Robin Williams to be wrapped up in film (like from a reel) from head to toe in a Hellraiser fashion and slowly squeezed until crushed to death
Someone had come up with the idea of using dead bodies to generate electrical power to replace fossil fuels. In practice this involved shoving leads up the anuses of human remains.
Myself and a couple friends were going through a series of dungeon-like rooms with deadly challenges. We came to the Sun Room and entered cautiously, guns at the ready. To our surprise, it was just a bare room with a carpet lit by sunlight through curtained windows. I had a sense of great danger.
Suddenly, the carpet started moving, and trying to knock us off our feet!
"Get off the carpet!" I shouted, and we struggled to escape as the carpet continually knocked us down. Eventually I made it to the edge, off the carpet, and thought, "Given it's the sun room, I bet we have to let the sun in to burn this carpet."
I struggled to open the curtains as my team managed to make the carpet fold back on itself over and over. Eventually the carpet had folded over until it was about the length of a person, so one of my teammates laid down on it to flatten it completely. Meanwhile, I was finally able to untie the curtain knots and pull open the blinds, and let the sun come streaming in. But it had no effect.
"We need to flatten it more!" shouted my friend, who was struggling to stay on the bucking carpet. I rushed over to help, and noticed some writing on my friend's body. It was a secret message from a man who had told us not to enter these dangerous chambers. I tried to read and decrypt it, it said we would be forced to face our greatest fears, and then said something cryptic about St. Matthew's Cathedral. I couldn't understand the clues. That's when my great-aunt showed up with a Christmas ornament of a cathedral.
"No, no, no, this isn't helping at all!" I said. Then I looked up and realized: my great-aunt had come through the door on the other side of the room. It had been unlocked the whole time.
This whole room was just a distraction. There was a bomb in the next room, about to go off. I could hear the beeping getting faster and faster. I started to rush over, but I knew it was too late. I turned back around and tackled my friend, shouting "I love you!!!" Then we all exploded.
A strange incident of forgotten particulars, possibly demonic in nature, occurred in a workplace. After the incident, all the workers misspelled every word when they wrote or typed.
Shinku, from Rozen Maiden, possessed a laptop which then started moving around the table trying to kill people.
I dreamed that I was about to have sex with a beautiful woman, but I couldn't get an erection. I then asked numerous men if they could sell me one Viagra pill. Nobody had any Viagra or some similar drug.
I gathered I was on training to go into space, so I updated my Internet Profile job title to say "NASA Space man" and, after receiving a glare, reluctantly added "in training".
Then I made a life-size bronze statue of Bender sitting in a bean bag with an almost-depleted cigar, and someone asked me "Did Moe Szyslak marry the pig, or just buy it?" over Quora. To refresh my memory, I walked down the street and looked down an alley to see Moe with his pig. I don't think I ended up answering the question.
I was driving in what looked like NYC even though I live across the country. I saw a black girl on a motor cycle so I smiled at her and she smiled back. I put down my windows and told her I want to see her again and she felt the same way. Despite not exchanging any information she showed up at my apartment and then we had some dinner and chill. We had to cut the chill portion short and get dressed because there was someone at the door. It was my friend and under a large blanket a 6 or 7 year old kid that was apparently the little brother of this guy I knew a long time ago. They arrived at the door independently from each other but happened to arrive at the same time. The kid was some kind of retard not really talking and sitting on my coffee table under his blanket. I had to maneuver the girl out of the house without my friend seeing her so he wouldn't tell my girlfriend which led to a Benny Hill meets Scooby-Doo scenario. He also got me some kind of plate set.
I was presented with a small maze-like arena, and had to defeat a rush of thousands of enemies of the same type (I could choose before they came out, and kept changing it from the default of goblins to spiders). I tried to make it easier for myself by balancing on the walls so they couldn't reach, but it was actually harder because I'd keep falling out, which reset the challenge without despawning all of the current enemies, and subsequently falling in, which meant I was overwhelmed with more enemies than there were supposed to be and could only get back on the walls by losing.
Anyway, at some point I decided to play it straight and it wasn't so hard. Then the boss with three health bars came out. It was a giant blue blob about five times larger than me. It was the basic pattern of boss runs at you, you jump out of the way at the last moment, boss bashes its head on the wall, stun, hit, repeat. After the first health bar, it hardened and became incredibly difficult to harm, until I realised I had more weapons than just the second red gun from Jak 3. I don't think I defeated it though, and woke up with the same feeling as after a nightmare, except it wasn't particularly nightmarish.
I am releasing this dream to the public domain if anyone wants to make an incredibly generic adventure game.
My niece was pupating in a big white, filmy chrysalis. She came out as just a slightly larger version of herself.
I lost my cat in the house again. Just turned up nonchalantly as if she hadn't gone missing for the past several timespans. Cats.
I was talking to my friend who is chinese and something made me really angry and I said a chinese swearword real damn loud and I didn't know what it meant but she did
Mr. Rogers was still alive, and he was chasing me with a shotgun through a big scary house with independently rotating floors out in the middle of a huge wheat field. No idea why he was mad at me.
I was riding my bike around town doing errands when I got lost and somehow ended up on the highway. I pulled over to the shoulder to look at the GPS app on my phone but it turned out not to be my normal smartphone but an old flip phone. So I tried to call my dad and ask him for directions but he wouldn't pick up. I sent him an SMS instead but he would only answer me with something about how the current price of green peppers was at an all time high and now was the time to invest. Then an army dressed in vaguely Soviet-esque uniforms overran the highway and made me and all the people in cars their prisoners.
I only remember the very end of it, but here's a dream I had the other day.
It appeared very much like a movie, with the "camera" angles being like that and everything. A middle-aged woman was escorting a couple of young people around, hiding them from something. It too place during a Trump presidency. The part that I remember, near the end before I woke up, had the woman and the young people hiding in a movie theater, blending in with the crowd. Everyone else in the theater was wearing a Trump MAGA hat, except they were all medium-light blue instead of red. At some point, the woman got a phone call, and during the course of this call it was revealed that the young people she was escorting were tax evaders. All the other people in the theater heard this, and immediately restrained the woman+guests and called in the authorities to execute them. I woke up right before the actual execution took place, but it was going to be a beheading and was being held right there in the theater, only a few minutes after the authorities arrived.
My younger brother had a 2" tall baboon in a cage. It was hopelessly aggressive, and I told my dad it was probably a bad idea to have a wild ape in the house, no matter how small it is. He agreed, but went back to reading the paper instead of doing anything about it.
Some youngish (13-15 or so) kids and I were having a gunfight in what appeared to be a hardware store. Apparently it was for a school project, the teams were divided up by sex and there was someone who looked like a teacher at the door. I got there late so when it came time to issue me a weapon they only had an old revolver for me. I ducked behind a display and started shooting at the girls, when one of the girls outmaneuvered me and put her gun to my head demanding I become her prisoner. Instead I quickly spun around and pistol-whipped her across the face and shot her while she reeled. The boys seemed to think it was a great move but the girls erupted in protest about how it was unfair. That was the point where I woke up.
I met a group of beautiful people in a moonlit park.
i was walking down a dark street when two people walking ahead were discussing a topic of interest to me (i forget what)
i interjected only for it to turn out that one of them was a friend who randomly stopped talking to me a few months ago, who immediately acted like we were friends again
for many minutes i had to stop myself replying with anything that indicated i was upset they stopped talking to me in the first place and unsure if i wanted to speak again because i hate conflict.
the second person evidentially disappeared and i can't remember what happened next.
they still don't talk to me.
Donald Trump decided he wanted to have sex with my grandmother. I taped up a pillow so he wouldn't hit his head while they were banging so hard, and in exchange he gave me a $73 check. I tried telling a friend of mine about it later but she was distracted because she was being stalked by ghosts.
Recently I have had nightmares about tax collectors. I have paid my taxes on time, but I still have dreams about tax collectors chasing me or doing horrible things to me.
I had a dream about Ben Garrison.
It was a very, very bad dream.
My dream had no plot, it was a lot of harsh noises and flashing colors. A lot of voices from people that stress me out, and I felt my regrets and shortcomings fall upon me. I woke up in a bad mood with a headache, which wasn't nice because I live on my mom's couch and she's been getting ready for work very loudly because she's upset with me. I had dreams like this often, does anyone have any input on why I might be having these dreams?
Some grill from an engineering department wanted me to explain to her what a reproducing kernel Hilbert space was and I was like nah
>>118 it might be because you live on your mom's couch.
I mean, I don't know your situation, but that's not usually a thing to be proud of.
>>120
I'm definitely not proud of it, but I got out of a very bad personal situation and lost my full-time job, house, friends, and all. My mom is only letting me stay here for a short amount of time until I get all my pieces together. Regardless, these dreams have been happening for a few years now, in cycles.
>>121 Been there... what to do is bring a prostitute home and fuck really loudly on the sofa, your mom will find a new respect for you, and get ready for work more quietly
I was on a walk with my father through a freshly ploughed field, when a butterfly landed on his head. I said "Wow, it's a Camberwell Beauty!" to which he replied "Don't be stupid, it's obviously a Black-veined White." I thought that's ridiculous; they look nothing like one another and my father knows nothing about butterflies anyway, but when I looked back at it he was right and I felt very stupid.
I was trying to kill a door-to-door salesman named Carlos with my shotgun that I have in trunk of my car, but I was trying to avoid having him find out that I was about to kill him. While he was doing his sales pitch in my room, I was thinking of ways of getting to the car without raising suspicion. I finally told him that I'd buy some of his merchandise if we went out to get my wallet from the trunk of my car. When I moved some stuff around and got out the firearm, he took a shotgun of his out out from his trunk (luggage). The tension kept rising until Carlos' homies started rushing the parking lot which prompted me to grab the rifle and ear plugs out of my trunk (vehicle) and try to take them out. Now the reason I hadn't already shot Carlos before his homies poured into the area was because I was not wearing any hearing protection and feared I'd damage my hearing. I took out his hombres leaving Carlos. I can't remember the rest, but I hope I got that bastard good.
I dreamt that I was constantly losing things and that everyone could see I was losing things to the point where people would follow me around to pick up the things I was losing and then I woke up at 6 AM and couldn't fall back to sleep.
There were other parts I couldn't remember, but I was in my living room (it wasn't my actual living room but the living room of the house I lived in in the dream I guess) very late at night, talking to a desolate-seeming German guy. The reason he was so upset was because it was New Years day of 2014(in my dream, but I just had the dream like an hour ago), and 2013 had come and gone completely without any kind of earth-shattering event happening. He said that, and I said something like "well that's true every day, the only reason I'm alive today is cause no one killed me yesterday. Right?" That seemed to comfort him but after that every time I would try to say something else to him my mom would answer from the other room, thinking I was talking to her and not to the strange German in the living room. I yelled at her that I was talking to our guest and not her and she came into the living room and we started arguing and when I looked over the German fellow was gone and I woke up.
I dreamed I joined the high school wrestling club and then Billy Herrington came to our club and made me suck his dick. He came in my mouth and it kind of tasted like beef broth.
I had this dream where I made an agreement with a competitive eater. I agreed to pay her $1000 to film her for 24 hours a day for one whole week after the event. I also negotiated a deal to sell the film, but I was only able to get $100 for it.
I was watching a show about someone in high school. He was trying to join the soccer team so that he could get close to the female goal keeper during during team pictures. Then I was him. I asked the photographer about whether the goalie would even be taking pictures at the same time, but she was more interested in getting me to pick between two flavors of green Gatorade. I sampled both bottles for a while, then they turned into bowls of vegetables, then rice. I made a decision and the photographer was kind enough to let me keep both samples. I left to go home.
I was being badgered by a fellow I didn't trust the look of while walking home. He was asking a lot -- my name, where I lived, other things you wouldn't tell a stranger -- but I answered everything truthfully, as you would in a dream. I didn't let him know of my home when we got to it (we walked along while talking, like the strangest of friends) and I carried on with him, planning to peel off later and circle back around.
A friend of his joined us. Light-haired and a little skittish. He seemed nice. He stopped and gestured as we passed an alley, appparently recognising the three dark-clothed lads there. It got violent, but my first acquaintance was unusually strong. He threw one of them on top of the nearby bins with a single punch to the jaw. The other two met a similar fate, and we checked their wallets. Within one were several photos of me, some from my childhood, all unsettling. I somehow knew these three were hired to deal with me, but didn't know why. I took the photos and hid the wallet under the guy taking a nap on the bins. Time to go home.
My apartment was three floors up in a five-storey building with no elevator. Panicked, I took the stairs two at a time, not counting the floors, and ended up with nothing more to climb. What? I should have recognised my door by now. I went back down. Pinned to my door was an eviction notice, but dated several months old. How long had I been out? More worryingly, it was messily covered in white-out and marker. Reason for eviction redacted. Issuing office redacted. Even the signature. Time to leave.
My escape was reversed when I heard a pair of smart shoes walking up the stairs, and the light-haired friend convincing them that going straight to the fifth floor was a better idea than checking any of the doors on the third floor. Thanks, but no thanks, because my apartment was locked, this guy coming after me already knew that, and the landing didn't exactly leave anywhere to hide. As quietly as possible, I strode back up the stairs, but the sound of footsteps only intensified.
I caught glimpses of the smartly-dressed official through the banister. He had a gun. I had a plan, sort of. I waited halfway up the final staircase as he ignored the third floor. If I could somehow get behind him, I could be on my way out before he knew what was going on! He was halfway to the fourth floor, so I readied my plan by, uh, climbing over the handrail. Landing on stairs from a one-and-a-half floor drop shouldn't be too hard, right? Fourth floor. Now or never. I took a breath, let go of the handrail, and woke up.
I was working at the top floor of a tall office building that had windows on the roof. Suddenly, I heard a loud tapping on the roof. A giant fucking red ant (like maybe twenty feet long and apportioned otherwise like a normal ant) was tapping its legs on the glass. Everyone else in the room I was working in lost their shit and started screaming, and people started to escape down the stairs to the bottom floor while I debated whether to stay in the building out of a fear that there would be more giant ants outside.
Next thing I knew I was watching the news in a house that I recognized as home, even though it looks nothing like my own home. As it happened, animals all over the world had grown to massive sizes somehow and many were attacking and killing humans. I got in my car and started to drive to find my family in a nearby city and sped past a giant bear and a series of massive insects. As I drove by the coastline, I noticed that huge waves were hitting the shore and that the ocean seemed to be rising.
Finally, I someone ended up with a group of strangers (who I assume were also fleeing the chaos) in what they described as a "safe place" - a beautiful piece of country, rolling hills and everything, the sun setting in the distance. There were no giant animals around. Just before waking up, I wondered how long we'd survive in this place before dying of starvation or being killed by invading animals or waves.
I had a dream about a baby. I don't remember the details, but there was definitely a baby.
I was visiting the queen. I gave her a tangerine, but it had a tear in the skin so she haughtily threw it in the bin. Then my father and I discussed the political situation on Mars.
So after I skimmed through the post about lucid dreams in the post your thoughts thread, I went back to sleep. First my dream was about meeting up with some friends to go to the movie. I got to the theatre, but for some reason, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't park within the lines. I realized I still had some time left before my friends would arrive (it was ?:10 and my friends were arriving at ?:30), so I gave up and went to a nearby gas station to get some snacks.
While looking for a parking spot, I realized I had accidentally entered the store with my car. It was really embarassing until I realized that would be impossible and that I was actually just on feet. I looked for some dr. Pepper, but I couldn't decide if it was normal to buy a 2 liter or a 20oz for individual consumption. I realized that was a stupid question and I only needed a 20oz. So I got it and a small bag of garditos.
By the time I went to check out, the line had gotten too long. So I left without buying, and went to get a hotel. Once I was in my hotel room, I kind of understood that I was in a dream. I heard some faint barking, and I wondered if my dog irl was barking at someone out the window. That's when I decided I wanted to fuck someone in this dream. I left the hotel room, which was now located in some neighborhood. There was a nice house across the street. I walked towards it, and I looked at everything and thought about how real it all looked. I hoped I wouldn't wake up, and I hoped that I wasn't wrong that it was a dream and that I'm not about to invade someone's actual home (although I was pretty sure it was a dream).
I entered the house hoping that there would be some women. Of course the first thing I see is an asian father and son. In my dream, I thought to myself that my brain always does this kind of shit. Then I see by the son a mother. She was a bit older, but I'm into asian milfs, so I approach her. She was still smiling while I did this which just confirmed for me that I was in a dream. I pull down her shirt to see her somewhat small boobs and I begin sucking. Then after doing that for a while, I woke up.
A bully from my childhood had a mental breakdown in front of me while waiting for a massage in an airport waiting lounge.
I was at work. I was very tired and couldn't focus on anything. My boss started talking about something on the inside of my mouth, and then she reached in with some sort of tool and started scraping it away. I noticed that she was suddenly very ugly. I left work and started driving away from my house. It was dark and my eyes wouldn't stay open. I turned on the headlights, and that helped a little. I came to the first stop sign, pulled out to the middle of the road, and noticed another car coming, but I didn't have the energy to back up.
I was at some kind of political rally. It turned out to be a bunch of people supporting Vegeta from DBZ for president. They later found out that he was ineligible to be president since he is a space alien and not born in the US.
I remember I sold a book called "Hangul For Men With Yellow Fever" and I was on tour signing autographs. Guys were sharing all kinds of stories of success with Korean women.
I saw some big bullshit
I was moving into a new house. It was a large, old, two story farmhouse in a forested area, overgrown with ivy. I was late and all the good rooms had already been taken because I found a tiger at the front gate and stopped to give it a tummy rub.
Remember the "Guess that Pokemon" segment on the TV show?
Somebody created a similar segment called "Guess that Touhou"
When the image was filled in by about 50%, I said Reimu and I was right.
>>141 Write that book and I'll buy it.
I remember flying, and the closer to the ground I was, the faster I could go. I was rocketing along these grassy hills, and then got on a highway and brought myself down to half a centimeter off the road and almost broke the sound barrier when I had to suddenly climb to avoid traffic. I ended up about 20 stories up and barely able to go forward. It was frustrating.
I dreamt I was in a simulation which was oxymoronic
I was working on paving a driveway when someone in the house yelled "hey (*ﾟーﾟ) who's that behind you?" and for some reason I answered in Japanese: "知るか？働かなきゃ！”(who cares? I have to get back to work!). But then my middle school crush who turned out to be a lesbian appeared behind me and was gushing over how it had been so long and we should exchange phone numbers, so we did, and then she gave me a hug that would have been uncomfortably long if it had been from anyone else even though I didn't have a shirt on and I was all sweaty from working on the driveway. Later she kept texting me faster than I could respond about some crap I didn't really care about.
I was playing some strange SNES political simulator game.
first, i was winning with Bill Clinton. i can't actually remember any of the mechanics except it showing their portrait and areas won as results came in. i was playing as bill for a while getting more and more obscene wins, and i think bill's sprite did some strange things like getting really drunk. i blacked out in-dream anyway.
Then when my memory started working again it turned out i had won an election either in 1981 or 1983 as Donald Trump. I can't remember how stylized he was, I think he was thinner but not younger than in our 2016. I won it so well that he even took Cuba as a district or whatever, which is apparently a US state in this alternate universe.
I was in some sort of college library trying to find a bad guy. I took an elevator that was actually a couch four stories up, but when I tried to tilt it to let me down I ended up lowering it again.
I guess I was living in the Scooby Doo universe, as a lot of it was run down and severely depopulated, and it was always dusk. I moved around from empty apartment to apartment as I worked for some agency doing something I can't remember. What I do remember clearly is I had the latest Samsung note phone and every time I picked it up, I'd accidentally bend it and the screen would crack all over, and it pissed me off that Samsung would build such a fragile product and sell it for $700.
Also, when it cracked, a thick crystal-clear gel-like fluid would seep out of the cracks.
>>150
Hey, I dream about accidentally breaking phones too. Weird.
take various chicken parts
add to pan with vegetables
add spices
bake
transfer contents of pan to large pot with rice and water
boil
eat
>>151
I hate those dreams. Oddly, I've never actually cracked a phone screen yet.
I jumped off a cliff wearing nothing but a dressing gown, and glided around as though it was a wingsuit.
I was being chased by a man who was trying to slit my throat with scissors, although I also had a pair of scissors that I could block his with. I realized that I was inside a video game, specifically a vn set in high school created by 4chan. Also, the school had a team of an alternative sport (name written in unrememberable dream writing but it started with the letter B) which apparently was a meme on /asp/ when the game was made. Playing that game was one of the paths you could take in the game. (I don't think it was the path that I had taken though). But no matter which path you took, you would always end up with the scissors guy chasing you. Eventually, I reasoned that since this was a video game, getting my throat slit wouldn't hurt. At that point I was being chased by a fat teenager who was scissors guy's minion, and he had a wire coming out of his scissors. So, having realized that it wouldn't hurt, I stopped resisting and let scissor minion fat kid prick my throat with his scissor-wire. Then I woke up, but not really. I ran around my house a little while, thinking of it as also fake and a video game. Then I woke up for real.
What do you think it means? It seems rather Gnostic to me...
There was a music festival coming up, and as a promotion Subway was selling special sandwiches based on the songs of one of the bands - each day they had a different sandwich. My friend and were really excited, so we went every day and got every sandwich, but when the festival actually came it sucked. There was only one band, and they only had one show, and they didn't even play any of the songs the sandwiches were based on.
I had this bad dream where the CP spammer of image boards took over the entire internet.
I had to get to an airport in Cloud City and the only way there was a terrifying curvy road high up in the air. I drove there and decided that next time I would choose a different airport.
There was a movie based on a true story about a large American Christian family that created a worldwide scandal by turning nudist. It was presented as both a comedy and a drama, kind of like Boogie Nights. In an iconic turning-point scene, the whole family had now adopted a daily ritual of climbing up and down a flight of stairs in a circle, intimately embracing each family member as they passed, sometimes kissing them, and asking them some hippy question about how they were doing. It wasn't intended to be sexual but looked pretty bad from the outside.
During this scene, an instrumental hip-hop remix of Final Fantasy "prelude" music played. It was really good and I could swear I had heard it before, but after I woke up I searched all over the internet for something like it and couldn't find anything good.
Anyway, during the staircase scene, a child that was part of the family's booming daycare business stumbled into the unlocked house early. She cried out, "Mommy, what are they doing?" Mommy came in and saw everything, and was appalled. As mommy announced she was going to tell the world and began to storm off, the mother of the Christian nudist family shouted after her, "Sure, go ahead and tell everybody! And forget all about what our family did for the Jewish community during the war!"
I was in a library. In the next room over, Nanahira was signing autographs and I really wanted to go get one and to talk to her, but I was too nervous.
I had a dream I had enough money to buy a case for my phone.
I was in the neighbourhood I grew up in. First, I was at the shop. I can't remember what I was doing there. I walked down the street into a grassy area down the side of the neighbourhood. I was wearing metal roller skates or had a bike or something. [I don't think the dream kept it consistent, it was something "special" though, so don't exist. My memory is fuzzy but I may have stolen them with my father within an earlier part of the dream.]
A kid who lived near me as a kid appeared behind a fence and being a sadistic little child, pointed a cruise missile at me. I ran away until I had reached a wall to a different area of houses which kids used to climb on when he fired the missile. I managed to take one metal thing off, threw it aside and ran again. The missile crashed short of the metal thing in the grass, then flipped onto it's nose. I think I ran into some trees when the engine came back on, but speeding through the grass it lost control and went away.
Then I talked to my father. I can't remember what about, but it was in the front garden of our old house. I walked along the road a bit past some parked cars, and then went up past the houses to a [much expanded from real life] grassy area. Actually, everything was expanded, roads were longer and wider, etc, but everything was in proportion. [so no giant houses.]
I had a dream where I was the star of a movie. This movie was similar to Smokey and the Bandit and Dukes of Hazzard. I drove a 1997 Camaro and a 1987 Mazda RX-7.
I was at some kind of supernatural lake area. There was a giant squid and an unidentified sea monster, but both were frozen in the lake. I drove a semi truck with faulty brakes backwards through the woods for a while before ending up at a girl's house and talking to her through the window. She told me not to offer to take her to the lake, so I didn't, and she looked disappointed. Then she told me not to ask to use her shower. I caught on and asked her. The dream ended with me in the shower.
I had just gotten a new job working directly with the millionaire owner of some nebulous business along with a bunch of suckups. This millionaire dude had a flair for the dramatic, and on hearing that two of his other employees were getting married, put all us newbs to work to make that wedding the most romantic thing possible.
Everyone else put out, hiring the horse & buggy, finding the perfect band, and all that shit. He was elated with all of them, and then asked me what I did. I said, "My job." and pointed to a wall of screens showing off a new, fully automated web security system fending off a huge cyberattack from somewhere in China.
Fucker fired me for not being a romantic like him. I woke up as I was on my way out to burn his mansion down.
I had a dream I was at an arcade, and at the back of the arcade there was a hockey themed slot machine. After using the machine multiple times I won a magical hockey stick. It was a glowing radioactive green, and was incredibly heavy. The next thing I knew I was in a hockey arena, and was playing hockey with the stick. I scored a lot, and all my goals involved me doing some sort of trick. After the game I ate some bad cheese and crackers, and got food poisoning.
I had this dream where I was making fun of Two-Face from Batman comics. I created a Joker with half of Ceaser Romero's face and half of Heath Ledger's face.
I was attacked by a flock of undead geese. They were the Dwarf Fortress variety, that is to say, they were just white "g" characters. They must have been from before the zombie nerf update because they killed me almost immediately.
My dog was sentenced to life in prison for premeditated murder.
I dreamed that I had listened to a song from Batman vs Superman on some streaming site a while ago, and this gave a telemarketer access to my cell number. The caller ID gave him away, but he would say things like, "Hello, is Mr. Anon there? This is his boss. It's urgent." And then when I told him it was me, he said, "Seen Batman vs Superman yet?" and I made fun of him for advertising a failure of a movie. I tried to google it to see if this was happening to anybody else, but my keyboard had pictures of arms instead of letters and I couldn't get the whole thing typed out before waking up. My boss is a woman, too.