Lame Confessional [LAME] [#2] (511)

1 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7184 22:14

Last night I stayed with my girlfriend at her parents' house, and I dreamt that I was having sex with someone, and I could push a button and my sexual partner changed through different people, and I flicked through until it was a fat old granny, and I was pumping away then I woke up and realised I'd ejaculated in my girlfriend's parents' guest bed.

493 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11144 01:16

When I was 14 years old and an anarcho-primitivist I would masturbate exclusively to caveman porn featuring brown people out of desire to keep ideological consistency.

494 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11144 12:29

>>490 I made a few of those

495 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11198 11:22

I pulled a muscle acting out a revenge fantasy. Epic fail!

496 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11247 12:22

When opening DQN I often say "dokyun, dokyun, dokyun, kitaaaaaaaaaaa" to myself under my breath.

497 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11388 17:32

One time a guy left a rude comment on my page, so I found his instagram and found a picture of his sister, then I printed it out and jizzed on it, then I took a photo of the jizz and sent it to him

498 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11411 13:47

I make TTRPG materials and insert my own fetishes into them.

499 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11468 20:15

For years I thought that the Rob Zombie song "Dragula" was about gay sex with a transvestite vampire, it wasn't until I happened to see the music video that I realized it's actually supposed to be about his car, like drag racer.

500 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11468 22:47

>WOWIEEEE MY REACTION TO THAT INFORMATION WHEN SAUL GOODMAN POSTS SCAT PORN THUGSHAKER DREAMYBULL BOYKISSER FEMBOY GOONING BNRAN NERD EMOJI BBC ONE PIECE COCK EDIT FURRY RONNIE MCNUTT SPEECHBUBBLE WALTUH HOOD IRONY ZOOPHILE INCREDIBLE GASSY TECHNOBLADE SAYING NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER CHILD PØRN GORE BLACK MAN TWERKING CLITTY DAIPER FETISH BIG FLOPPA GET REAL PETER SCULLY PIZZA TOWER BWC PIPE BOMB SKILL ISSUE SILLY CAT MEME.MOV ON MY MINOR GROOMING SELF HARM SERVER LMAO #GENERAL @EVERYONE HAHAHAHAHA LMAO I'M THE FUNNIEST HUMANOID ALIVE WE'RE LAUGHING AT YOU IN VC

501 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11540 13:37

I havae arcane made-up rules for myself about if and when I'm allowed to doublepost in a thread, dependant on the length of time since my previous post, the ratio of my posts to others' posts in the thread, and the quality of the post I want to make.

502 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11566 03:08

Sometimes I google translate dqn into japanese and pretend I'm on 2ch

503 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11566 11:18

>>499
How disappointing

504 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11566 15:24

It's possible that I was kidnapped as a baby, then forced into a cult so that I could be sacrificed. It seems it didn't work out, and now the cultists have no idea what to do with me.

I want to fight them all, honestly.

505 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11566 15:40

I am scared to death of every single one of my coworkers.

506 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11566 20:14

>>500

I don't think anyone would care if you killed yourself.

507 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11567 09:39

>>505 works in a haunted house

508 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11568 00:04

My first love killed herself yesterday.

509 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11568 10:56

>>508
That's fucked up, I'm so sorry.

510 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11568 16:41

>>509
It's okay, let's not dwell on it here.

511 Name: (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) : 1993-09-11568 16:42

>>509
It's okay (well it's not, but still), let's not dwell on it here.

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