Last night I stayed with my girlfriend at her parents' house, and I dreamt that I was having sex with someone, and I could push a button and my sexual partner changed through different people, and I flicked through until it was a fat old granny, and I was pumping away then I woke up and realised I'd ejaculated in my girlfriend's parents' guest bed.
>>51
Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light, darns you to heck for this.
I like Dilbert a little too much. Enough to pick up that reference.
I'm intensely jealous of that guy who claims to have dreamed about Everybody Loves Clonepa.
>>55
I meant actual Dilbert comic strips which is quite a bit more worthy of a lame confession.
I only started watching anime in early 2013
>>58
So, you became one of those, about whom you used to make "funny" "ironic" jokes?
I wish I could find the Zelda CD-I Youtube Poop where the guy with the key is sentence mixed to say "Move your ass to shit on this gay cock". I have a growing suspicion that it was removed, though.
I think they also removed the Dr. Dreadful one where he says "You can make lots of gross semen that tastes gross, from my penis that tastes great". :(
>>61
I'm a programmer person and most programmer people are also quite stupid. It's subtle, though.
>>61,63
I used to think I was a superior person, but then I realized I'm actually quite stupid.
>>62
A friend of mine has the habit of always saving everything he likes online. He has multiple terabytes of videos ripped from YouTube, hundreds of games, a massive music collection, and a bunch of websites including a full mirror of Wikipedia that he keeps up to date - all neatly filed away and catalogued on a network server that's connected to a blazing fast LAN.
I think if the internet ever completely disappears, he could probably restore half of it himself.
>>67 He could set up a site that hosts videos that get taken down, and help people stitch their favourites back together?
I'd like to see a united Sweden-Finland, just for there to be a country whose outline looks like a cock and balls.
Whenever I see nonsense words, I have to read them backwards to see if they make any more sense that way.
I made a sincere, corrective wikipedia edit.
I hold a lot of grudges; I'm just really bad at maintaining them.
>>70 http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f0/Map_swedish_lands.png
It does look like that. Too bad this is no longer a country.
I just put my hand under my laptop to warm it up.
For the longest time I thought she was "Rogue the Bat."
I'm still in middle school
I'm in my final year in middle school
>>76 she is kind of a "rogue", so it's understandable.
Related; my confession is that I still like Sonic Adventure 2.
I like to search for lesbian incest-themed pictures on pixiv and booru sites, especially mother-daughter. I do this at home on a computer nobody else uses, with the blinds closed.
I sometimes post kopipe on /a/
A few days ago I tried playing Runescape for the first time in many years. I used to play it an awful lot when I was younger, and came to be really rather good at it. I found that it has changed to an extraordinary extent (not surprising; it's been several years) but I somehow feel like I'm betraying my younger self by not being outraged at these changes. Actually, they were all pretty sensible and the greatest criticism I can give is that they make the game slightly too easy in some ways.
I'll continue gaming confessions. Personally, I believe that gaming is not lame but in certain situations it became so. OR well, the confessions themselves in this thread could be just lame like this one, right?
So, anyway, I just finished a good round in BF4 and after initial frustration I must report that the patch made this game a bit less stable but a bit better. Still close quarters encounters feel as if I'm against MLG PROs most of the time which is ridiculous. I could dominate other players easier in BF3, so it must have something to do with the new netcode and my webconnection.
My greatest internet legacy remains creating Lame Confessional #1
i like steering http://sageru.org/kareha.pl/823158365/ towards shota even though i'm not really into the whole shota thing.
I was disappointed when I realized that Adventure Call was just a spoof and not a real game show.
I smoked a cigarette once but I always tell people I never have.
I'm http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1368127055/458 but not http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1368127055/455
Someone was nice and I took credit for it.
I had a nightmare that you were all laughing and picking on me because I missed a 2 GET
Back when I had a Yahoo e-mail account, I would always flag Yahoo's promotional mailings with the "This is Spam" button.
I'm a guy and I think lesbian porn is stupid and boring.
I'm a guy and I think faux lesbian porn is for guys afraid that seeing a penis might make them gay, or those that just publicly pretend to like it to affirm their straightness. Lame Confession: I know because I was the latter guy in the past.
i read my captcha as codeine...it wasnt codeine
i just really really want some codeine
>>93,94
I'm a guy and I think yuri is the pinnacle of beauty, and that little other human creation can even come close to competing; a good yuri manga can put me in a good mood all day, and it is one of the greatest tragedies of my life that none of the lesbians I've met in person have been anything like those found in most yuri related media.
On the other hand, I agree that lesbian porn is stupid and boring.
I still suck my thumb.
I totally bailed on a show with my best/only friend a couple nights ago because panic attacks are no fun. Don't mind me, just gonna go do my agoraphobe thang now.
I must admit that I like cute things a lot.
I used to get around the filters at school by looking at porn through google images and rubbing my pants, until one day the window I was looking at suddenly closed by itself. I assume someone in the office monitoring them closed it but I never heard anything about it
My mother bought me a pair of mittens because she knew I liked them. I was slightly disappointed that they were the convertible type (with flaps that go over the fingers) rather than purebreed mittens.
I can't find a man-sized pair of purebreed mittens and had to make do with the same kind that >>102 has.
I misread the cuniculus of Oryctolagus cuniculus as cunnilingus.
When I was a kid, I thought the word "penis" came from that it was for peeing through. I also don't remember if I confessed this somewhere on the thread before and I can't be arsed to check.
I still lurk DQN.
I egged some VIPPER on too much and accidentally ruined an OK thread. Sorry OP if you're reading this.
I'm the OP of that thread, and no worries, sir! I remade the thread better than ever.
I was going to steal some girl's unattended underwear from the laundrette, but then I noticed that there was a security camera in the corner and got scared and left.
I once saw a chick with a huge rack wearing a T-shirt that said "LOOK BUT DON'T TOUCH" across her tits. I was tempted to ask her "Does that mean I can look all I want?" but I was too chicken to.
>>110 That makes me think of a girl I met. Her shirt said "Hello. I am ^ up here" She really needed it.
Whenever I see the word "Turducken" my mind wands to split it up as "turd-ucken".
I care more about the hibernating butterfly on my windowsill than about any real life people I know. If it doesn't wake up in spring, I shall be extremely distraught.
When I see something prefaced with "the truth about..." I mentally prepare myself for it to be a pack of lies.
I was really tired when I woke up this morning, and I thought "Oh no! I must have forgotten that it's daylight saving's time, and now I've had an hour's less sleep! But it wasn't daylight savings. I just wanted more sleep, as usual.
I still find myself beginning to type "iichan" in my browser's address bar sometimes.
>>115
The truth about things prefaced with "the truth about" is that they're all packs of lies.
(LE:;.:...
I watched the entirety of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98T985W1azM. I loved every second of it.
>>120
Got to admit those are some pretty pro moves, though I ended up pausing around the 7 and a half minute mark.
I saw a link to "The Thing with the Quivering Jaw" on that Yume Nikki wiki and thought for a moment it said "The Thing with the Quivering Jew".
*You know me so well, I'm going through hell
Won't you please, follow me?*
When I heard these lyrics without looking at the text, I heard it as "I'm going TO hell" and thought they were pretty poignant lines. I don't like the real ones quite as well.
>>123
I have experienced the same symptom, when I first looked up the lyrics for Pink Floyd's ``One of These Days''. It got so bad for me that I intentionally started listening to music in languages I couldn't understand. That way I can listen to singers with nice voices and imagine the words are better than they probably are.
The downside is that the names of artists and albums all run together after a while, so I can't remember what I actually liked and re-listen to it.
>>124
But then you might listen to a song about some trolls (the D&D kind) beating the shit out of a couple of gay priests in a sauna until the building collapses, and never even realize it.
>>123-125
For the longest time I had a hypothesis that popularity of J-Pop, J-Rock, their Scandinavian alternatives (and the rest) in foreign countries stems from the fact that those listeners are unlikely to understand the lyrics, no matter how awkward or annoying they are.
Whenever I've just finished cooking and the hob is still hot, I rinse my hand or a wooden spoon or whatever happens to be at hand and dramatically spray the hob with drops of water, creating a hissing noise and a puff of steam. While doing this I like to pretend to be a wizard, casting spells on things.
Sometimes I think I'm the only person who thinks that Half-Life sucked.
>>125
Better to have experienced such a thing and not known it than to have never experienced it at all.
Some dork with a clipboard intercepted me on the way to lunch to ask me if I'd help stop gay bullying. When I asked if he meant stopping gays from bullying everyone else, he got confused and I went and got lunch.
>>130
Knock yourself out, then:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRVMptEjbBk
...what? You thought I was just making up an absurd example? (Ok, so I guess I inferred the "gay" part rather than it being said explicitly, but otherwise, yeah...)
>>130
Impressive. If I didn't know the contents, I would have considered that unimpressive. With context, it was somewhat entertaining. I had no idea that Folk Metal was a genre.
>>138
I once got bullied by a gay guy in middle school and he wouldn't stop trying to touch my body.
I'm glad that I wasn't raped.
Tasting Faygo is still on my list of things to do before I die even though I'm not a Juggalo or even that much of a fan of the Insane Clown Posse.
(I do kind of like ICP just because they make me laugh, though, which I suppose is a lame confession in and of itself.)
yesterday i put a brand new, clean toothbrush in my vagina to see what it would feel like. i cleaned it off afterwards. today i might do the same thing again.
Sometimes I like to split the word "warthog" as "War Thog" when I read it, and imagine an orclike creature geared for battle.
>>136
Faygo is nothing special. In the Detroit area it's just a brand of inexpensive soft drinks that the supermarkets sell.
I have a different problem. I'm stuck in Michigan for the foreseeable future and I crave birch beer. Birch beer is a soft drink manufactured and sold only in Delaware, New Jersey, and eastern Pennsylvania. It's sort of like root beer but less sweet, with a stronger, sharper flavor that has overtones of ginger and mint.
Interned at Kass, Shuler Law Firm for a year. Direct experience with scheduling litigations/court dates, file work (on and off the computer), and assitant work.
>>137
So? How did it feel? I would imagine you wouldn't feel much.
>>136
I am not a juggalo and I don't live anywhere near detroit(like 4-5 states away), but faygo is excelent. I drank a faygo redpop once and it was life-changing.
I'm eating hot dogs with ketchup on them for breakfast.
Where does the whole "never put ketchup on a hot dog" thing come from, anyway?
>>144
It comes from the fact that ketchup on a hot dog is disgusting. Mustard, absolutely. Onions, sure. Relish is good too. But ketchup?
>>143
In southeast Michigan, the REAL "ghetto" soft drink is a brand called Towne Club. That and cheap store-brand/generic Kool-Ade.
I still prefer "same fag" over "jisaku jien".
>>144 I have never heard of this...
>>145 what??
>>147 I distance myself from all those -fag terms used on imageboards (newfag, samefag, tripfag etc.) because I always picture it coming from those kind of people who think they're really edgy being part of the 4chan club, using other offensive terms just to sound hard or something. And while I sort of agree, that words are just arranged sounds, and that any meanings or offence found in them comes from within the person hearing them, it just seems immature to use them so lightly.
>>142
It was really bristly and pokey and kinda hurt the side of my vag, lol. I have a relatively small vag, I think. I couldn't really maneuver it in there as well as I thought I would be able to. I guess it felt about how I would have expected.
I used to think that Lo Wang in Shadow Warrior (the fuckin' original, not the remake/reboot/what the fuck ever) said "EAT THIS, PINCER DICK!" I'm pretty sure now that it was probably meant to be "pencil dick", but the mental image of a "pincer dick" remains with me.
He also said something that always sounded to me like nothing quite like "Sucks on balls, squashy penis." I'm still not sure what that one's really supposed to be.