[NOVEL] DQN Shirt Novel [FAIRLY NICE] (672)

1 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7402 05:43

The shirt was

423 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8195 07:38

COCK

424 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8195 15:21

"I am fine, Aly, how are you?"

425 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8196 13:13

CHARTREUSE

426 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8196 17:28

CABOOSE

427 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 15:23

CHAPTER 24
THE LOST CHAPTER

428 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 15:35

One day, Mario woke up and decided to take a shit.

429 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 17:51

CHAPTER 23 AGAIN

430 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 18:35

It all started 15 chapters ago.

431 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 20:00

CHAPTER 8

432 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 22:10

"Let's get this back on track." muttered the conductor, who was wearing

433 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8197 22:22

a fairly nice

434 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8198 01:45

red flannel shirt with

435 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8199 17:19

fairly nice

436 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8199 19:41

lime green trim.

437 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8199 23:11

The conductor himself was

438 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8199 23:21

lime green

439 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8200 00:19

with rage.

440 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8200 18:18

Fairly nice rage.

441 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8201 00:04

"How are you on this fair day?" said the rage to the assistant conductor as he stepped into the conductor's cabin on that fated day.

442 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8201 12:08

"I'm fucking

443 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8201 12:10

nice," replied the assistant conductor.

444 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8201 12:51

"Thanks for fucking

445 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8201 18:04

ittekimasu"

446 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8202 20:38

"CHARTREUSE CABOOSE SUCK MY DICK

447 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8203 04:39

I'M A LEAN MOTHERFUCKER AND BITCH YOU AIN'T SLICK"

448 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8203 15:44

"But who is Slick?"

449 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8259 09:24

Said an innocent bystander with

450 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8259 12:49

AIDS

451 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8260 02:38

written crudely on his t-shirt with a Sharpie. It was not

452 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8260 03:39

nice at all.

453 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8264 16:26

His name was Kevin, and he was

454 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8264 16:33

widely regarded as being the most annoying person in

455 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8264 18:37

Portlandia!

"Put a bird on it Put a bird on it"

456 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8300 16:17

Yet there was one thing everyone thought was fairly nice about him:

457 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8300 16:42

His PONOS.

458 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8300 16:43

his crooked Jew harp.

459 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8301 11:35

always fell out of his pocket
he never ceased to do anything about it though

460 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8309 15:28

This was because he had a well guarded secret: his harp was actually

461 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8309 16:07

Patrick Duffy in a harp suit.

462 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8309 20:24

Anyway, the point is

463 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8310 05:54

ya gotta catch em all

464 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8310 07:20

over my face.

465 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8310 17:01

Meanwhile,

466 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8310 22:20

the shorts were on the shirts

467 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8339 02:59

, and the limes were in the bowl.

468 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8339 22:01

The eggs were beaten softly into the flour/pumice mixture, and the butter onions were preheated

469 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8340 20:02

before frying.

470 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8340 21:40

It was fairly hot.

471 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8343 06:49

when compared to the following countries

472 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8343 07:53

Norway,

473 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8343 09:34

Zimbabwe, Paraguay, and

474 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 01:24

the end

475 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 02:46

EPILOGUE

476 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 06:33

On the first day God created

477 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 11:09

your mom

478 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 14:56

, the most beautiful woman, also known as "Eve"

479 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 16:22

, as in "Eve of Destruction." With tears of bubbling pitch streaming from her uncountable eyes, she looked over the new Earth, spread her wings of shadow and flame to the heavens and

480 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 17:12

saw a shirt.

481 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 17:48

The shirt was

482 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 18:01

torn to pieces by a mass of gibbering petty demons.

483 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 19:13

Eve smiled with one of her seven mouths, for

484 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 19:47

the cutest little bunny was

485 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8353 20:07

wearing an off-the-rack lime green affair.

486 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 01:38

"I will spare the Earth," she boomed in multiple voices, "long enough for you, little bunny, to learn some basic fashion."

"FAREWELL" She screamed as she exploded. The bunny looked up and

487 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 02:03

smoked weed everyday.
420 blaze it

488 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 13:20

#Bernie

489 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 16:27

insisted in an annoyingly nasal voice that everyone pronounce his name as "HASHtag Bernie!"

490 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 17:04

#Bernie was wearing

491 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 17:52

a weed weave shirts

492 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 17:53

and an ill-fitting suit made of

493 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8355 22:57

capitalism.

494 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8380 21:05

And then

495 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8380 21:26

the universe

496 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8380 21:41

started playing on the History Channel.

497 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8381 00:34

During a commercial break

498 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8478 01:19

Are you still wearing that off-the-rack lime green affair?
PP‚uPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@No!
@QQQQ@@@@@@@@@@@@ ÈÈ@ÈÈ @
/@@/ @@| |@@^@@@@@@@@(EÍE )(LƒÖ`) Don't lie, Timmy.
l “ñ | @@ | |@@@@@@@@@^ PP’UPP^|
_QR_Q||@@_@@@@.^QQQQQ^^
@|;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;|@@@@@@@ |l„Ÿ„Ÿ„Ÿ„Ÿ„Ÿ]l|'

499 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8478 21:24

the viewer changed the channel to

500 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8479 03:53

watch a show about making shirts where the people who make the shirts talk directly to the camera about how they feel while making the shirts they make.

501 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8479 12:54

The shirtmakers felt

502 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8479 13:59

happy, then sad, then worried, and then really happy when they delivered the shirt. It was

503 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8479 22:28

happy, then sad, then worrisome, then really happy.

504 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8480 01:41

In the middle of the show, the owner of the shirt shop tried to buy an okay shirt off of some random bozo so he could make it fairly nice and flip it for a small profit, but they couldn't come to a fairly nice deal and had to let the shirt go.

505 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8480 02:26

The bozo was fuming.

506 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8480 03:58

He'd even worn his best bright red honking nose for the episode and

507 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8482 15:33

developed a rash from wearing the red nose. In order to cure

508 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8482 17:19

it he hoped to brown nose the producers but

509 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8482 17:47

the producers wore fairly brown shirts on their noses already

510 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8492 19:41

CHAPTER 17.235

The local Illuminati chapter leader put his shirt back on. It was a

511 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8492 20:30

[REDACTED] shirt with [REDACTED] patterns and beautiful [REDACTED] on its sleeves and neck.

512 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8492 20:36

The [REDACTED] in particular was very nice.

513 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8492 21:36

Umami

514 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8492 21:53

was being eaten by the who had been putting his shirt back on while

515 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8492 22:35

crying out, "Henry, oh, Henry. Give it to me straight Henry. Tell me how it is. I don't wanna know but you know I gotta know. Henry. You know I know. But I need you to tell me, Henry. Oh, Henry! Tell me what's really ugly. Henry? Oh...Henry...you said it...I knew it, Henry. I knew it! You didn't even have to tell me. Henry! Oh! What's really ugly? Henry..."

516 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8506 13:49

This shirt is fairly nice, said Henry.

517 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8506 19:19

The shirt had a photo of a frozen microwaveable meal on it with the words "TV DINNERS" in bombastic lettering.

518 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8507 18:08

Henry put the shirt in the microwave and set the timer.

519 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8508 12:32

The fairly nice shirt had a fairly nice explosion in the microwave.

520 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8536 07:25

Larry King's asshole

521 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8536 18:58

s

522 Name: (iœjĪªª²iœj) : 1993-09-8536 19:23

diffused through

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