Previously: http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1310158763/
Let the fun times continue!
Prologue: The Death of
the mannequin (which had suddenly and inexplicably appeared) stood none other than
And his book of notes which contained
two tickets to paradise.
Eating the tickets, he
stabbed himself in the heart and died ungracefully. Unfortunately
the
tickets had expired. When
he reached the gates of paradise, the gatekeeper said,
"Grown men should never bite their tongue unless you eating pussy that smell like it's a stale plum."
What biting tongues had to do with anything or what pussies smelled like stale plums none dared to imagine.
The reader is now invited to
An enigmatic young lady by the name of Felicity Cotangent
came into the room and all eyes were drawn to her.
But she was guarded by several imperial storm troopers, so Randy McNally would need to use all of his
throat drops to
distract them.
Felicity took
umbrage
they proceeded to enter the castle, only to find that the princess was in another one.
Annoyed, Felicity began shouting an endless monologue of profanities
and compliments to the chef.
An entire cubic kilometre of
spaghetti fell out of Felicity's pockets.
muh dick
he then proceded to recite the entirety of http://dis.4chan.org/read/vip/1228352361/ (JEWS [Part 8]) backwards whilst
weeping for his runaway master, the GSS.
The GSS, who was in the middle of searching for his runaway sister, found himself in a Mars rover which was strapped to a gigantic
off of a mountain years in the past due to a tumbling river wheel.
"JEWS!" He shouted into the cold night, lamenting
the days gone by, when he would have gaysex with VIPPERS at all hours while the Universal Quantifier sang
Carmina Burana on repeat at quadruple-tempo.
Meanwhile, Gascone was
kissing her brother Goscone despite
aroused by the incestuous exchange. Guscone, on the other hand, appeared rather nonplussed by the whole thing.
The controversial directors Gescone and Gyscone (no relation to the aforementioned razorback hogs) were filming the entire experience for their upcoming independent unrated art film, titled
due to budget cuts they
had to replace the whole class with clonepas and lolis, who they payed in
Predictably enough, the lolis soon
their clonekittens had returned once more
to duel with the rich people.
Thus shall end their tyranny. The duels resulted in
But this was not all. The lolis disappearing caught the attention of Ace Dilowitz, private detective, and he thought that something sinister may be happening. As it turns out
, there wasn't. At least, nothing sinister related to the aforementioned lolis was happening. However, there was one loli who was tangled up in all sorts of sinister plots. One very special loli known as the GSL.
Chapter 2x(NEET)-1^(cot y): In Which the GSL Gets All Tangled Up In A Bunch of Sinister Plots
A sinister plot came and tangled her up! Seeing this, Michelle Obama
was fat.
Chapter 37.9299292: Michelle Obama is Fat and Angry
The First Lady splayed her corpulent ass over the sofa and shoved another handful of Cheetos Puffs into her maw. Oprah was on TV, giving the business to
brainwashed sheep" while Phillip K. Dick was listening
some painfully obscure
indie band.
Suddenly, the Sun
was bright.
"Barack!" Michelle growled, "Close them damn shades!"
his best buddy Saddam Hussein, who never actually died. Saddam
because an earthquake shook the entire course and reshaped the green. That earthquake also damaged a nearby
bunker housing the weapons of mass destruction Michelle was hiding under the backyard of the White House.
The weapons detonated, killing everyone in a 50km radius, vapourising their bodies and also killing their ghosts and completely erasing them from history forever.
Meanwhile, on a desolate mountainside in Kazakhstan, a portal to
the Nether
Potassium refinery was entered by
a Nether Potassium ore transport truck. Driving this truck was the GSL, who was still trying to untangle herself from the sinister plot which had wrapped itself around her entire body. Fortunately, the GSL had brought the ultimate sinister-plot-detangler:
Called the plotestroyer, it was invented by the brother of
the non-existent child of the GSS and the GSL. Which is to say, it was invented by the GSS. Maybe. Probably. Perhaps. Unless, of course, it was not, which is entirely possible. But not very likely. Unless, of course, we're talking about the GSS. Which, of course, we are. Probably.
Anyway, booty gryphon.
Suddenly, a 777 GET tore out of the ground, splitting the mountain asunder!
"Good Heavens!" exclaimed
the newly sentient plotestroyer, shortly before succumbing to
the shock of simultaneously becoming aware of the concepts of life and death, which caused the plotestroyer to revert to a non-sentient state. Meanwhile, the GSL was still tangled up in a sinister plot, so she
put on a frilly dress and span around really, really fast - until suddenly
ga-gantch
detector. This meant that she could no longer
detect ga-gantch without having to use her spare ga-gantch detector, which was a boring grey color unlike the broken one, which had been pink and had frilly lace and a floral pattern on it.
Just then, the sinister plot began to unravel.
It unraveled like a ball of yawn in the tiny yet evil paws of the world's cutest kitten.
Clouds of doubt fogged the weary detective's windshield as he navigated the rainy streets of
>>786
his own mind. "Give me a sign I'm not dreaming," he said in vain desperation, looking to the sky in an ironic gesture.
As it just so happens, a sign that said "SIPS CO." was floating in the night sky. The detective was
, however, too busy staring wistfully into the distance to notice it. The local
grump
turned 67 years old
. Two away from 69 which is funny because sex. Being a 12 year old transported to an old man's body by aliens, the grump was looking forward to turning 69. He was grumpy because he had just discovered masturbation before being put inside the body of a man with a non-functioning penis.
Spying the grump, the detective snapped out of his scotch-addled daydreams and barked a barely intelligible message into his intercom:
"Target acquired. We got the bait ready?"
However, no one was listening on the other side as there was a parade going on.
But not just any parade.
It was a honky-tonk parade. Bystanders likened it to a melody played in a penny arcade.
The detective saw straight through this
"Robitussin Flavored Ice-cream" scam.
However, none of that mattered, as the GSL rolled the sinister plot up before anyone could even begin to care about the delusional detective and his brain problems.
Unfortunately for the GSL, her recent acts of godliness had completely ruined her false identity as a simple maid, and pretty much everyone knew she was actualy alive now, except for
Baby Carpy
and Shibbledy-Sharply. Nobody ever told them anything.