What makes me want to slit your throat so badly?
That case was a landslide victory for the Jews, and it looks like we have bigger problems than berserked-out lumberjacks.
What happened when the media covered the case of the 1000 rabid lumberjacks?
That is because you used the wrong hole.
Why is my cock brown?
I'm tellin' ya man, REPTOIDS! R-E-P-T-O-I-D-S-!
Oh my god, who slaughtered my dog?!
Apply some essence of the knowledge on your forehead.
why does thinking cause me so many headaches?
It is like 100 gallons of ball sweat.
How is life on Jupiter?
It's so creamy.
I wonder what childbirth is like?
Just give up, it wasn't meant to be.
I try to pull out all the hair from my armpits, but they keep growing back. What do I do?
jait
Why don't you ever make any sense?
Wear it and girls will peep at you!
what are those funny pants with no zipper or buttons for?
Negative number IQ.
Hey, got spare coin for a helpless bum?
I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly. C´mon!
why do you drool when you look at me?
The opposite of TANASINN
I want to buy a soda... But for some reason it's not accepting my dollar bill...
Your awareness slowly fades, and soon after you feel as though you've been ravaged by a thousand angry eels. Then you get pie.
I think I had an out of body experience, but just to be sure, what is one usually like?
Don't worry about it, it should just wash out.
I just got jizz on my pillow case, what should I do? :(
Ramen is for bitches, real men eat beef rice.
I'm hungry, but I want to look like a man.
Oh god. That is just sick.
Did you hear about the Yakin Byoutou cosplayers?
American women learn Sumo wrestling.
Did you hear? They finally found a way to make Americans feel good about being morbidly obese!
Only sometimes, and even then, only sparingly.
When a tourist goes to Japan, what are the odds of meeting a woman that looks like Miyabi Hayama?
The second shittiest animu.
What is your opinion of Clannad?
My little sister's chest meat.
What is the flattest surface on earth?
Dogs will bark at your presence.
What do I do to see Lara Croft naked?
Sounds like she should have eared on the side of caution.
Did you hear the story about the girl who put her ear against the train track to hear the train?
Finishing a race in 4,129,070,619th place.
How bad did the losingest loser lose the race, anyway?
Knowing French in a room full of Spanish speakers.
Is Annie Hall a good film?
Please reread what you just asked.
omg so hoe do i maek suar tat cat is phone??????
Only when speaking to a police officer.
Have you ever been in love?
You can use my gluestick.
Help! The world is infested with construction paper zombies!
In fact, I haven't eaten one of those in a month.
I was told that strawberry Pocky is the most addictive food on earth. Is that true?
It is like falling anus first on an erect horse penis.
Why do I keep getting an uncomfortable wet feeling when I stand in front of porcelain bowls?
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
Oh man, I just heard this great song on the radio about a horse with no name. Isn't discovering new things great?
Actually, it was The Four Lads.
Hey, were you aware that those fuckin' TMBG posers bit "Istanbul" from The Four Tops?
Because both of >>38's sentences are about 40-50 year old music.
What was it about this thread that made you want to bump it?
Yes, I know, it was actually released in 1972
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvoD8TiW5OQ&feature=related
What being an otaku 20 years ago was like.
What's Otaku No Video about?
I say we come up with a plan to assassinate him.
Obama? What about him?
We need more Jell-O and cucumbers.
anything you want me to pick up at the store, dearie?
well of course there were three, what did you expect?
Why were there three?
stop that
its silly
Yo dawg, do you like cars?
I don't know, I know it's made with soya stuff, but I don't actually know what else.
Man, soylent green is really good. I wonder what its made of?
Just keep doing what you're doing. More ladies in chainmail bikinis couldn't hurt though.
What happened to my pet lizard once it got out of its cage?
It is like watching every episode of Gatchaman without taking a break.
I'm thinking of trying ecstasy. What should I expect?
Technically, you can, but you better stock up on adult diapers first.
What should I do with this poteto that I'm slicing into Franch Frais?
Silly dokyuun, there are no girls there!
HAY ANY HAWT CHIKS WANNA HOOK UP 19/M/USA
It was only available as a b-side on the blue-vinyl 7" of The Blues Are Still Blue.
Did Belle & Sebastian really record the Internationale?
They already have that in the UK.
I went up the road to New York the other day, and i drove around a weird circle road thing, god it was confusing! I asked a policeman and he said it was a "roundabout"! Have you ever heard of anything so crazy in your life?
It's where you break half a custard cream and half a chocolate bourbon biscuit, and press the creamy halves together. It works with oreos too.
Hmm, you're a pretty sexy plug. What are your specs?
I coulda swore I told you, they're ex-humans who lost their humanity in some freak accident and ended up with that particular deviation.
Zombies?! You damn scientists didn't tell us that they're motherfucking zombies?!
THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!
You know, we were all pretty drunk and phone and me just saw her and... Hey it's not personal, mate! There's no need to break up with her!
Interesting, considering your love for big boobs. Oh, the phone's ringing... Yes? Hello? Yeah, Freud here!
Hi, this is Jung, is Siggy there?
It was simply a terrible set up, it's not like you could have done any better.
Do you hate me for cumming too fast?
Oh lord, you're such a knobhead... Of course not!
Is Arudou Debito a genius?
Try some Xanax and some Zoloft, it really helped my friend.
How did you know I was such a nerd?
The placebo effect on steroids
What is the most slippery slippery slope argument?
The greatest invention before sliced bread.
How would you describe a bread knife?
He's been posting replies to himself all that time, using lines from Morrissey's We'll Let You Know
Who is that strange dude over there, and why does he look so mad?
It's like jazz run over by a japanese steam-powered steamroller through a broken amp.
What are Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra like live?
That's what I meant by "It's been done"
Hey guys! I'm going to fansub the newest movie!
Like being hit by an attractive lady.
What's it like to be hit by an attractive lady?
It's an emergency, there's no more "Wait and see"
I wonder what happens when we run out of mittens... let's find out?
I was thinking of an image macro and trying not to laugh.
Why were you giggling at your husband's funeral?
Nah, I'm not really into pokemon.
Have you tried the new Ubuntu release?
I don't mind when you come round, though if it's the weekend I just might be in bed
Hey man, do you like Ubuntu?
Aw man, i totally hate it. Seriously.
You know when you're making out on your sofa with your girl, and the phone rings and it's her dad, but she then tells you her dad died a long time ago?
Yeah, he used to be such a sweet boy, holding so tightly to his daddy's hand
>>75, I heard you knew Hillary Clinton when she was a kid.
No you can't, the cat just gets stuck, and it never works quite right after that.
Can't we just suck it out?
Oh my God. Its full of stars
Look, I cut a gash in my belly with a scalpel, is this awesome y/n?
Give in to the pressure, the cop's gonna get you
Should I prove EVO IS NO.1 on the public road?
Nitromethane plus Nitrous Oxide
How the fuck can the Flash make clothes out of thin air?
its pronounced E-JIT
My Scottish friend keeps calling me "idjit" in messages to me, what does it mean? I think it's an insult
The more you ignore him, the closer he'll get
Am I wasting my time with him? Look at him, he's fallen asleep with his head on the bar. Should I just forget him and find someone else?
Yeah, let me in please
Hello this is the tanasinn chamber. If you enter you must leave your shadow with us, and you may never return to the outside world. Would you like to enter?
I will take 5 of those please.
Even though they are cheaper in bulk, they remain quite horrible... Are you sure you want to order a bonsai kitten, sir?
You must construct additional pylons.
How do I make my penis bigger?
King Arthur.
Who was the British geologist that discovered a very unique rock formation?
Because she ate all the donuts at the Krispy Kreme.
Why did Diana really die?
Meat, and lots of it. That is the only way.
How could I help Morrissey be a more commercially successful recording artist?
At least think about the implications!
I have the ability to make DQN the world's most popular website, therefore I should, right?
It's the only reason why I bother getting up at all in the morning.
Am I the only one who thinks sleep is the best thing in the world?
Try relaxing your anus.
Is there anything I can do to improve my dance style?
Hot peppers, onions, tomatoes, and light mayo.
I'm interested in a great sub, but one that sets me apart as a ladies man - any suggestions?
Listen to them - they are more experienced.
The voices in my head keep telling me to kill myself! What should I do?
Yes, with the possible exception of chocolate pudding.
Is it weird for my food to be the same color in my feces?
Two boxes of Cheerios and a carton of milk.
So let me get this straight - you took on the entire North Korean army and won, while armed only with WHAT?
Because it's winter.
Why is it only 65 degrees and all the plants are green?
I want to take it easy.
Why did you favourite this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKrTGBq74wg&feature=related
She's a good girl, ain't she?
Have you seen that lead singer of Tokio Hotel?
I was thinking about something from my childhood.
Holy fuck, your paintings are disturbing, to say the least. What inspires you?
Yeah, one's viagra, and one's like sudafed or something, you leave them in an envelope somewhere for someone to pick them up lol
Why did you scream and run away when you saw that church guy?
Because he is a panda.
How can there be evidence supporting claims that Jesus was both black AND white?
11 year olds, from what I hear.
What is this year's hot new trend?
The third trimester is the new 18, so they say
What's with so many students killing themselves before third trimester starts?
It's the law, I'm afraid. You're coming with me.
Can't a man masturbate alone in the privacy of his home?
Infinity-plus-one.
How many days are there in September?
I'm afraid DQN's character count per post is insufficient to answer this question. You should probably read the book "電波男" by Tooru Honda if you really want to know.
I need to know what the fist 5000 words in "電波男" by Tooru Honda are. Can someone post them for me?
I doubt it, your sister was the same.
Are there girls not totally fascinated by those stupid rocks stars created by Disney?
It is like being bukkake'd by guys with erectile dysfunction.
What does it feel like to have twelve garden snakes right in front of your face?
That's why you don't hire statisticians to mow your lawn.
What the! Why is my lawn shaved down to a bell curve?
The first one is free, then they got ya hooked.
How do tobacco companies get more young people to smoke?
Saturday the 14th.
Do we have a date yet?
You wish!
Who says "Oppai Oppai!" in that other thread?
Do you have a question about that other thread?
Because it's written in LISP.
Everthing I read aloud in thith post thounds like thith. Whatth up with that?
Seven, if you keep them warm.
With current advances in medical science, how many donor penises could I graft onto my body without succumbing to rejection or infection?
That's a really good idea, you should try definitely try that, but let me get my digital camera first so I can capture this moment for future enjoyment or cash prizes.
Should I fight Sigma without any armor upgrades aside from those fucking boots?
No. Everyone chooses him because they figure since it's about the holy sword, he's got to be the main character, but I don't give a shit how strong he is, since he's slow as fuck while Kevin is a double-hitting badass, despite being overshadowed by that flamboyant fangirl-magnet, Hawkeye.
I chose him because I figured that since it's about the holy sword, this dude's got to be the MC; and I'm telling ya he's powerful as fuck.
Never got round to using that Kevin dude yet though, wondering if he's any good. You reckon I should stick with my current guy?
If the price is right and the place is secure.
Should I go to a brothel downtown?
I, for one, welcome our new overlords.
What a fucking pain, I just want to spawn more zerglings, but this character limit forces me to spend precious minerals on floating brain-sheep. What do you think?
I would have to pick the sexy lady gremlin from Gremlins 2.
Did you or did you not take your medicine today?
Well, it depends on the shape and structure of the broken object.
Why don't you like my new shetland sheepdog puppy?
Yeah, I got your "positional stabilizer" right here, pal.
Did you get the cock ring I sent you the other day?
That's old enough for me.
Old enough to pee?
Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun
Have you ever been in Bangkok at twelve o'clock, foamed at the mouth and run?
You can do that, but be be prepared to clean up a big mess afterwards if you do.
Should I eat 12 packs of Metamucil?
Because much to my own sadness, Reimu will never be as popular as that slut Marisa.
Why can't you play Embodiement of the Scarlet Devil without crying?
Well, I don't think you've much experience in dealing with the Zulus.
In Civilization III, I'm trying to get Writing off of the Zulu, who have a much weaker military than I do. I have nothing to trade, so I'm demanding it. What am I doing wrong?
You don't want to hang out with them, they're all gay or transvestites.
Do you think I should post in the "[Gay] In this thread we call the previous poster gay or a transvestite [Transvestites]" thread?
That's actually just a Frisbee.
What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?
The head of John the Baptist.
What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?
Everyone thinks they're so great because they take cute pictures that you can put on the internet, but in reality they're always bitchy and mean and just generally suck as pets.
Why do people like cats?
What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?
How can you fail at a thread so badly?
Take six Tylenol 3s, two Robaxacet, and two anti-histamines. Call me when you wake from your coma.
...
June 6th, 1901, that's the same day Hitler had a one-night stand with Churchill
When the hell did that thing come out of my dog's ass?
The cure for that has been with you all along.
/k/ommando here, Lately I've been so depressed. Any one know of a good way to cure depression?
Lesbian Monkeys from Outer Space!
What are your thoughts on the the Bonobos and what is your theory as to why they are only found in the Democratic Republic of Congo?
I don't know, go ask Squeeks
WWSD?
A shaven monkey prostitute.
Goddamnit, I can't get an erection off from normal porn. What helps you get off easily?
This society's like totally corrupt'n'shit. Like, you know, big corporations are ruining our like spirituality and stuff, like totally...
I never wanted my multimillion dollar job. Should I quit now and become a hippie?
Wrap it up in toilet paper, and flush it down.
What should I do with this dead horse?
I don't think Squeeks is ever coming back.
I got a postcard from Squeeks that just said "Greetings from Mexico!" Do you thing he'll bring me a present?
That's between you and God.
Why does God hate me?
A monkey with fours asses.
What happens when deranged morons get genetic modification machinery?
William the pigeon
Who was the least respected medieval English king?
Twist it up, smoke it down, lah-de-dah-de-dah
What I did with the medical herbs my friend gave me.
Marksmanship, how to dress a kill, tracking, navigation, and edible plant identification.
What are the 5 most important skills for an airline pilot?
Too much tanasinn. Think more, feel less.
Tanasinn?
You'd think the crowbar would have done the job, but no, it didn't even make a noticeable difference.
What did you do to that dead body?
Death is the only answer.
What spell should I use to fill up my last black mage slot?
No, no, a thousand times, NO!
So, would watching Crazy Dave Tape be time well spent?
I can't believe that the Japanese never thought of it first.
An all wheel drive car with an inline six engine
shooting laser beams from the eyes
Is it possible to cure rectal cancer?
No, that's awful. You should be ashamed of yourself.
I want to get plastic surgery so that I look like one of the orcs from the LotR movies, but I'm worried that my friends might disapprove. Should I?
You must use a pair of tweezers to very, VERY carefully remove the foreign object.
I think the coke-filled condom up my ass is broken, what should I do?
You know that just might work. A little more nail polish and, yeah.
I'm trying to fake my own death, will this dummy constructed out of trash bags and carpet samples convince the insurance company and my six wives?
I think it's just there for decorative purposes.
There's a gigantic cave spider in my room, what the fuck?
You burn it into a Blu-Ray disc.
A hacker put a virus on my computer, what should I do?
AIDS and cancer at the same time.
Final solution for USER heh man!fi.Jek4HW6 and other distasteful miscreants?
You're right, I am awesome.
Why are there three gigantic tentacle penises emerging from your pants?
Sorry, we don't stock those, but we do have this lovely sledgehammer.
Have you seen my Mjolnir lying about?
Frankly, squeeks, I'm amazed you've survived without it this long.
Why did you give twenty dollars to that daytime prostitute?
Well, if you want to risk needing a colostomy bag for the rest of your life, it might be fun.
How does it feel to sodomize yourself with a tree branch?
As far as I'm concerned, he should have never had that status in the first place.
What is your opinion of President Obama?
4 first class plane tickets from Tampa to Tokyo on Christmas Eve, followed by a rented Nissan GT-R, and a shopping trip with some Ganguro girls in Roppongi and Shibuya.
Try to find something better than mittens. Go on, I dare ya.
I dunno, something that walks on four legs in the morning, I guess.
what has become of today's youth!?
not unless you're able to properly pronounce the words fennesz, reburf and wareruride
Do you think I'll be able to pass my tri-lingual math test?
iichan could help you with that.
Is there a slower textboard than here?
The world.
Aaah you know, that guy with the steamroller and then he shouts and goes WRYYY and... damnit, I really can't remember what it was called!
Well maybe if you count the corpses, too.
Overall, would you say the happiness of the Chinese people increased dramatically as a result of the Great Leap Forward?
FYAD
So, what is the name of your immigrant co-worker?
You can use a toothpick for that, just make sure to remove pointy sides.
My eye itches, what do I scratch it with?
A herd of /b/tards.
Whats worse than a /b/tard?
Dead men tell no tales.
This storyteller is boring me to death with his boring stories. What should I do.
The same as giving gloves to mitten lovers.
Could you answer your own question? Alternatively, how would MacGyver make a bug?
What? No, it's nothing like that ...
How do i ensure that 1 less Obama vote is cast in 2012?
Because someone outside the guiness book of records records that number.
>>183
Why can't I find a count of how many times you've fucked up and will fuck up this thread in the guiness book of records?
Because you're fucking nuts.
Why don't people appreciate my blood paintings? http://Crinkle-CutBeatroot.deviantart.com/art/Long-Walk-Home-127590660 (Please click full view)
Try some progressive jumpstyle.
How can I get better at DDR?
Laser.
I think cats are pretty cool as they are, how could we possibly improve on god's cuddliest creature?
I don't think you're my type, but if I'm ever looking to experiment I'll let you know.
I need a mad scientist who can build diabolical devices to further my schemes of world domination. Interested?
North, West, South, West.
What are the directions to get to the superstructure from the haunted forest?
Find that heh man dude, he'll know.
What is it like to be a namefag and tripfag?
Does this question have an answer?
Write it on paper, and we'll see.
How do I solve Fermat's Last Theorem?
It's called skull fucking, dummy.
Wh..what are you doing to squeeks!?
When I bought it the cashier winked at me.
What was it like to die at Yoshinoya?
Red Mage, Fighter, Thief, White Mage. It's just how I roll.
Which of your Final Fantasy themed D20s will we be using at today's session?
Mr. Pibb. Lots of Mr. Pibb.
How do I wax my chest?
A single dolphin.
When I cross sedate lions for an immortal porpoise, what should I give it?
Five tons of flax.
Hey mom what's for dinner?
No, they were only 5$.
Could you loan me five dollars?
Your idiot brain couldn't comprehend it anyway.
Why didn't you tell me how Clonepa was made?
He was the other guy all along.
How did that yaoi about the schizophrenic end?
Thirty-seven.
What is the meaning of life, the universe, and logical positivism?
It's merely an algorithm which injects vowels into randomized consonant clusters in a statistically sound way, giving the appearance of pronounceable words for ease of cognitive processing without being so entirely predictable as to be easily mirrored by a similar engine or to fall susceptible to a dictionary attack. Any resemblance to real words is purely coincidental and not worth celebrating.
What is a left-leaning political columnist?
I recommend the nine iron.
What dull implement should I use to club you to death with? It should have enough reach that I don't get any of your filthy blood on me.
No, they should all be euthanized.
Should we protect the retarded children?
The stealthy assassin of old people.
Who was that funny black dude I saw on the TV the other day?
He is that guy who used to troll world2ch/world4ch and whatnot, I think he was also a rejected goon.
Who is moot?
Because you can't relax around him or his bans.
Why shouldn't I resurrect Draco, the ancient Greek lawmaker?
Just add Spartans.
How do I turn a shitty video clip into a successful Youtube phenomenon?
Cloning Debito Ardou.
What would result in the destruction of Japan as we know it?
Aids.
I need some help around the office, who should I hire?
Really, ethnocentrism is like a circus, and otherwise respectable cultures are the biggest clowns of all.
Do you think Asians are cool?
By typing "DESU".
How can I make everyone hate me in the quickest way possible?
Displacement is vital to the process.
What do I need to find an object's average velocity?
Lots and lots of vodka.
What do I need to observe a Russian at maximum velocity?
It didn't come with a kitchen.
Why did you send your new computer back? I really don't get what your problem is, it worked just fine!
Exactly. Just like the giant heads made from metal standing in the cornfield, on the Pink Floyd cover.
So, Jeremy Clarkson looks like either the Easter Island heads or what now?
No way in hell there's six of them left after tonight.
What would happen if every country in the world had large stockpiles of nuclear weapons starting yesterday?
The large, tangled mess of cords under one of the couches in the basement.
Is there any evidence I forgot to get rid of?
I had to chew it thoroughly.
What would sex would look like if it were made out of mud and frozen decomposing undergrowth?
But I don't want to suck his cock to keep my legs.
If the whole world flooded, what would humanity use to soak it all up?
Press 9 three times and then dial the number you wish to call.
How do I bring Squeeks back from the dead?
Protip: Cast Beat and Defeat.
I really don't get it... What am i supposed to do, now that she's dead? I feel like i don't want to live anymore...
Leave me the fuck alone!
Hi, I was just wondering, would you please take this box full of money? It is perfectly legal and duty-free, I just don't want it anymore.
A hundred million, a million trillion stars up in the sky.
What are those specks of light that are always above us at night?
Why are you just staring at me like that, not saying anything?
Münchausen by proxy syndrome
What do you get if you put a hamster in a blender that plays classical, German music?
JEWS.
wud do you maked from crudged oranges?
Then that makes the panhandle the testicles!
Why do so many Bible thumpers live in the Florida Panhandle?
Death by having to smell someone else's farts.
What is your deepest, darkest sexual fantasy?
Sorry, I must have made a typo. wink
What's so special about a rectal exam anyways?
Male genitalia of the tiny type.
What do you see in the mirror when you undress for a shower?
SNOOPING AS USUAL, I SEE.
Yo dizzle bizzles, I'm just chilaxing with the gizzles here in mah chizzle. Preach.
I doubt it, but you should consult a doctor just to be sure.
Did you give me AIDS last night?
Thunderwhistles.
What did you install on my toilet?
i know it's too late but in future scan keygens etc with www.virustotal.com, virusscan.jotti.org or novirusthanks.com
OMG my halo keygen i got of teh interwebs was a virus! WAT DO?
Seriously man, you have to stop doing that.
I bought Halo the other day, you should buy it too, maybe we could play?
THAT is my trump card.
I see you have a photo of your neighbor with some other guys dick in his mouth. Why do you have it?
A house without a roof
I didn't want to pay for a whore, so I tried pirating one using a keygen. I ended up getting an STD from it. What do I do?
Double-sided tape.
I need to put an "I'm Stupid" sign on my face what do I use to keep it in place?
Mooning a bus full of retarded schoolchildren.
What is the best way to die?
Flying animatronic genitalia.
If you could chose any pet, any pet at all. Which one would you chose ?
The banshee says it's sorry but apart from that... I think you still have to take care of that tribute to the United Future Organization.
Dude, I hooked up with some girl last night after you guys left. Man you should have seen her, long blond hair, sad piercing eyes and nice tight body in a tighter white dress. She was a real screamer. I woke up next to my saxophone, she was gone. I was feeling pretty bad so I picked my sax and started to play a few notes. It sounded so dull and empty like I had no soul. I don't think I can go to the studio today, can you make up some excuse for me?
You look like you've seen a ghost; What in the hell happened to you last night?
Sorry, I'm legally blind.
That isn't a popsicle in my pants! What is your problem?
fuckballs
HAL9000, will you please divide by zero?
You must type both into Googlefight.com and then you will get the correct answer.
What is faster, the speed of light or the speed of sound?
100 Yaoi fangirls with strap-on dildos.
So, who wants this gigantic crate of SUPA KAWAII NEKOMIMI ^________^ kitty-ear hairbands?
It's "aluminum," not "aluminium."
THE GOVERNMENT REPLACED ALL OF THE TIN FOIL WITH ALUMINIUM! IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY! THIS IS ALL A PART OF THEIR PLAN! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?!
Eh, what's a body or two gonna do for me in the long run?
The journey of 1000 miles begines with a single stiff.
Using a chainsaw to scratch your balls.
I tried scratching my testicles with an electric mixer and they STILL itch. What would be considered going off the deep end?
A gigantic pimple the size of Canada.
You know, having the world sitting on his shoulders year after year without end can't be good for poor old Atlas. Doesn't he get any sort of ailment on his back where the world is lying?
The stalest meme in the world.
If this isn't MADNESS, what is it?
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
What is Squeeks's hat made of, if not poo?
Sixteen of them.
How many Clonepa threads will have ended when we finally reach 1994?
No, it's eating up it's own ass. It just sucks.
Did anything interesting happen when I took a worm and made it into a circle?
Adam Powers juggling nitroglycerin
Who is Adam Powers? What feat will it take for me to have any interest in this person whatsoever?
SSSSSCIENCE!
How can I mix two black people in one?
What kind of question is that? Squeeks, obviously.
What exactly did you mean when you yelled "SHITHEAD" spontaneously?
You know, simply like this: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
What was the programmer's national anthem again?
It's simple: kill the hat man.
How can I get rid of Squeeks?
It's just a jump to the left.
Where is the landmine on this battlefield?
Randy Marsh porn
Could you please kill this thread with an answer nobody wants to know the question to?
Dicks. Dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks.
What is the plural of dick and can you say that again because I'm hard of hearing?
The essence of all that is evil.
If they served food at TEH REI'S DINOR, what would it be made from?
Yay! Let's dance! (>^_^)> ~(^.^~)
I'm drunk as hell, what should I do?
The greatest number of courics in a single day.
When an SSBBW takes a crap, what is it like?
TIMMMAYYYYY!!!
If I give you $20 will you pretend to be my friend?
Under the covers.
Best place to keep my personal Rei?
Trowel some into the dumpster out back and see what happens.
My dog is missing, have you seen it?
The milkman
Who is that guy that appears on old American television shows and works a job that no longer exists?
A performance enhancing drug that enables people to beat the toughest video games.
(・∀・) I've always wondered what types of pills grandpa's always taking.
(・∀・) It's sort of like a typewriter, but I think you only get one try before the cronies come a lookin'.
What is the Internet?
Only if you can outwit Security Kitten.
Is there a way I can steal food from Rei's Diner?
A beer filled vending machine in a High School.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Where did you put my mittens?
Fat would be the most concise way to put it.
How would you describe the beautiful existence that is the average DQN denizen?
Toothless, covered in chemical residue and accelerating through the stratosphere.
What happened to that guy that smoked a cigarette in the hazardous chemical factory?
An alternate reality where bamboo eat Pandas
If Stephen Colbert were God, what would the world be like?
Surprisingly, Canada
What's that place where milk comes in bags?
Aw, it just means she likes you.
Why did that girl put a dildo in my anus?
Alternative sausages.
What did those fucking hipsters eat for breakfast?
Pork Chop Sandwiches
I'm looking for new masturbation toys; what do you use?
I'd fuck that excrementially.
Kanu Unchou?
That man who is the de facto leader and owner of half of the western text boards.
Who is John Galt?
BREAK THE SUPPORT DISC
Say something that sounds like it has something to do with FF7 but actually has to do with something completely different, please?
That is not a good time to release the emergency mittens.
uh oh. The emergency mittens are on fire. This is bad, isn't it? What does it mean?
STRIKE ITS WEAK POINT FOR MASSIVE DAMAGE
A sexless pedophile has broken into my house. What should I do?
Stop making sense.
What will happen to the Elitist Superstructure as we get older?
It's a question of lust.
Should I go with Progressive or Esurance?
His middle name was engraved on the handle.
Holmes, do tell me, how was it that you found the murderer of my ex-wife?
You know as well as I do, >>295, that that is completely subjective.
Why are you ugly as hell?
The only bad thing about Kirby for the NES/Famicom
I wonder if I'll have to fight that stupid penguin again?
Because our busdriver is a crackhead
Why the hell are we driving off this cliff?
Because you touch yourself too much.
Why did you encase my hands in concrete mittens?
That's quite simple, >>299, you need to apply the Laplace Transform on the step function.
I wave a magic wand around and yell "henshin" why can't I turn in to a magic wielding heroine?
The anime that did for the 2000s what Neon Genesis Evangeilon did for the 1990s.
What's Pokemans?
The ID thread in /iaa/...
Help! Someone stole one of the keys on my keyboard!
I pressed the easy button again.
Why does my easy button have a dead battery?
the dumbest magic spell ever cast.
I'm playing FATAL, and the only spell I have is Bestow Sniffle.
I'm now going to kill myself.
How will you do your part to make the world a better place?
Give it some time and see if it gets any larger.
Why won't my monoboob grow? can i make it get bigger!!?
Don't keep clicking it, that won't make it go any faster.
I need to cross the street right now! How many times must I push the button?
A gun with a backwards barrel.
Who is this self-proclaimed "Captain Lerrab" idiot?
She's frosting a cake with a paper knife.
What makes you think she got into Grandpa's booze?
I'm sorry, please ask again later.
What makes you think she got into Grandpa's booze?
I blame >>523.
Who will make the dumb post that kills this thread?
The most explosive popcorn.
What is the number one cause of microwave-related deaths?
Without a thorough colonoscopy, all I can give is idle speculation.
What breed of mouse is currently inhabiting my anus?
I don't know, he sounded pretty gay to me.
Remember my flatmate, he used to wear those flowery shirts and listen to the Smiths? He married his girlfriend last week
They live in a dark, wet country ruled by girly-men.
Punjabs.
He has a lisp.
How could you be sure it was Grandpa?
what is this I don't even
Any retarded channer shit you want to get out of your system?
Because I don't like playing Deus Ex.
Why are you a bad person?
Nah.
Should I save your mother from this boiling vat of oil?
So that's why I have a hangover.
Grandpa?
I just realized that Johnny Carson was doing this joke as "Carnac the Magnificent" on TV in the 1970s.
Why do you look so pensive after watching "That 70s show"?
The skinniest BBW.
ur mom
Time! Time!
THEN WHO WAS PHONE?
Because the previous poster is also a panda, that's why.
Why didn't you get the reference?
Shut up and drink your coffee.
I have a serious caffeine allergy, do you think maybe you could call an ambulance?
Because I walk with a limp.
Hey, everyone else has a pet photoshop. Why don't you have a pet photoshop?
The only possible answer is Diet Pepsi.
How could we possibly power such an impossible contraption?
Meat would be the obvious answer.
What's that sweet and meaty smell?
Because there weren't enough let's-play-games-with-your-captcha threads.
Why were you angry after visiting DQN today?
Though it might be difficult at first, it is our only hope.
Must I truly go back in time to reverse the Eternal September?
Then don't drop it, dumbass.
If I drop this tune, it will literally set the dancefloor on fire!
It's only equalled by your lust for oreos.
What is your fascination with butter on bacon?
Ejaculating in a mayonnaise jar and giving it to someone else.
What is the dickest thing you've done so far?
Patchouli Knowledge.
What is something that is always better when written in italics?
If it is thought, then it must exist.
Does God exist?
They were originally planning to make tennis balls, but there was a mix-up and they got potatoes instead of rubber.
Why does my tennis racket turn tennis balls into french fries?
Anthro pigs and anthro elephants
What are the most common fetishes among chubby-chaser furries?
It carries out and is w.
What is the greatest thing a DQN can accomplish?
Teaching quantum mechanics to a 10 year old.
What is the greatest thing a DQN can't accomplish?
Hamilton Bleach.
How many people are in your bed?
The synthesizer solo in "Europe - The Final Countdown"
What do you get if you cross the Doctor Who theme with a giant panda?
How can I answer silently?
Green, elongated cucumber jokes.
How do I win the heart of a cucumber?
An innecessary and terribly obscene amount of dicks.
Losersayswhat?
The doctor said it was treatable!
My condolences on losing your legs to advanced hikikomori's disease.
A bottle of bourbon, a Strike Witches boxed set, and a loaded handgun.
My little sister has a birthday next week, what should I give her?
Wait until it rains, and then pound on them a bunch of times with a rubber mallet.
Whats the best way to get rid of moles?
Engage according to operational parameters.
Bravo Sierra, this is Whiskey Tango. We have visual on the enemy. Please advise, over.
Playing Perfect Cherry Blossom while driving.
What was ZUN arrested for last year?
Fifteen flavours of jelly just weren't enough, I guess.
Why did that guy with OCD freak out in the 12th aisle in Sweetbay?
The dumbest superhero power that actually accomplished something.
What is Greyskull?
that part became very much like the ending of "Tears of Sun" movie for me... reteating like a motherfucker, mentally handicapped AI teammate is trying bravely to revive a friend and I'm bandaging myself, I even shot an APC... but so many fucking chinks man... going backward toward the evac point and shooting as many chinks as I can and a dramatic change to side arm and the complimentary AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
What was the most memorable thing about the Mario Kart game for you?
I personally think he did it just for spite.
Why did someone key into my car "I love you" ?
Dhalsim's dick
What did they use to rescue that little girl who fell into the well?
The easiest (and safest) way to check the difference is scent
I'm never quite sure when I pick my underwear off the floor if I should wear them again or throw them in the hamper.
fourteen point oh-five degrees kelvin
Some bar said they had the coldest beer in the world. Exactly how cold was it?
100 kegs of Rolling Rock beer.
What else does the AVGN own besides a shitty game collection?
Selling real flamethrowers in a children's toy store.
How can I effectively breed stupidity out of the human race now that the theory or practice of eugenics isn't cool anymore?
The same reason hip-hop 'artists' steal from classic rock songs and call it 'sampling'.
Why do Japanese language song have several English words in them?
Hidden underneath your mother's bed, and kept shut with a lock.
Where can I find a secret dildo collection?
If you're losing that much blood, it's probably better to go to a hospital.
Nonsense, it's only a flesh wound.
The secret is annealing at 250 C. for at least four hours afterward.
I tried to make a Fancy Hearing Cake and it tasted terrible! What could I have done wrong?
Put two of them in a cup.
I have a surplus of girls, what should I do with them?
The pages turn, the wheel spins, and the clock stops.
How do you feel, seeing your aunt naked?
I think it was around seventeen, maybe more
How old were you, the first time you saw your aunt naked?
Your aunt is now my sexual fetish.
My aunt just died. What now?
The yellow river in China.
Where does pee go when you flush?
Send a photo of that to the New York Times.
What should I do with the fanny bag that I just discovered on my belt?
Try talking sense into it. If it doesn't help then gnaw on it.
My antelope is stuck on 'shuffle' again!
That's kind of what you get for lending it to your dead cousin.
Why is that, after giving my guns to my insane and dead cousin, is he now plotting his revenge against me for my failure to revive him?
Yes, I do believe you manage to be even faggier than Relolia
Do I look fabulous or what?
Clockwise if you're in Europe, otherwise not even God can help you.
Which way do I go on this roundabout road?
North Korea's socialized medicine.
What resembles your typical HMO coverage except is way more honest about it?
I believe what I said at the time went something like "hurrrrr".
Why did you get on that roundabout road?
Every word of it is a lie, including "a," "an," and "the."
Have you heard that tale about a man, an plan the panama?
On 4-ch DQN we are all panda
So in your opinion, what do the members of DQN have in common?
All of it! The entire thing!
How much cake do you normally eat?
You have only yourself to thank.
Which people should I thank in my award ceremony speech?
Akhnaten, I guess.
Who's your phavorite pharaoh?
I got the idea when I saw Squeeks wearing the poo turban.
What possessed you to found your own religion?
Sort of like sycamore seeds.
What is the taste of sycaless seeds?
It's the direction of the ferret wheel.
What's the least helpful definition of the word "clockwise" that you can think of?
Ms Patchouli wants you to read her the SICP.
How can I learn more about Touhou?
Drifting a London bus.
What's the most ignoble stunt you've pulled lately, DQN?
The holy trinity of one part onions to two parts bell peppers and three parts celery.
What's the least appropriate thing imaginable to put in ice cream?
The secret is that there is no secret--it is exactly what it appears to be.
So what's the secret ingredient of your special tomato soup cake?
Well I do have a friend who made a giant phallus on Minecraft, if that counts.
What makes you so unique?
Another one bites the dust is not by michael jackson
What is your opinion on the latest Freddy Mercury authorship theory?
No more than forty-six. Unless we're talking about the lilac sort, then up to sixty-seven.
how many flowers can I stuff in my vagina?
Everybody in the world, except for the goddamn icelanders.
Who secretly hates ljuetfisk?
Bees. My God.
I poked this nest, what are those things coming out of it?
Butts man.
Who's that guy who got his superpowers from used cigarettes?
My right ankle.
What's for dinner?
Because it makes less of a mess.
Why would anyone have sex with a hollowed-out watermelon?
1924. It was a hell of a year!
Can you tell me about the years before 1993?
Knee socks.
Which protective tool that should be worn at all times is not as good as mittens?
It's a hell of a ride.
Is it fun to ride a magic broom?
Anii.
If you were to describe all tripcode users in a single word, what would it be?
Probably about 15%. Best case scenario, 20%.
How many of the websites you visit do you think wouldn't get you in trouble with the law?
You should probably start by admitting your mother isn't fit to be a psychotherapist.
I have ADHD and I want to go to the therapy, but my mother won't let me. What should I do?
It's funny, because there is no reason to escape.
Help! Beautiful women have locked me in this room and rape me! How do I get out?!
Because that was MY kitten, asshole!
So, will you vote for Kang or for Kodos in the next election?
Eighty-seven.
I don't see why you would even need a term for a sixty-niner with eighteen people. What did you call it anyway?
My darling waifu.
Who is that morbidly obese woman with the varicose vein and the two club feet?
Dogs. Lots and lots of dogs.
What can I find at the Korean all you can eat buffet?
The sequel to HumancentiPad.
The smoking Crackberry
Izumu movies
Where are all the Japanese BBW?
The Didovics play battleshits.
So, how's schizophrenia working out for you?
Get out of my house!
Hey, stranger. Where's a bum go to take a shit in this place?
It's not my fault, my penis exploded!
Why are you able to dress in women's clothing so easily?
The arrival of Megaman/Rockman X9.
What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?
All he said was "You'll know when you find it".
What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?
Take a deep breath, open the nearest book at a random page, poke into it and this will be your answer.
What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?
I can tell one thing for sure, Espeon has casted GAY MAGIC spell on you.
What could possibly be more exci-- no, never mind that. Haven't you ever gotten the urge to violently rape a pokemon and/or cat?
I have about 800 myself, but I know some guys have several thousand.
How many hug pillows can a hardcore otaku have?
Every Sailor Moon episode digitally remastered and re-relased on Blu-Ray.
What would your weapon of choice for eternal world domination be?
The power of one hundred standard-issue houseflies.
What kind of power does the Lord of the Flies have anyway?
Only twice.
How many days per year did you pretend to be sick in order to skip school?
It would be in the bonus features of every Blu-Ray that contained digitally remastered episodes of Sailor Moon.
What would happen if Sailor Neptune and Sailor Uranus came to life and their sex tape leaked on the internet?
Honor thy error as hidden intention.
What do I do if I feel a bulge when I'm groping a chick I picked up at a bar?
The first time was in May of 1993. His body was cold but his breath was hot. "Oh, >>425" he whispered as his hand teased and explored me like none had before. "I'm ready," I said, as my heartbeat quickened. He grabbed my ass and slid it down. "I'm going in." A jolt of electricity shot through me as his general forced open those tightly sealed doors and entered the hidden room. He found what he want; he came, and he left. But what remained?
When did you first experience the pleasure of being cummed inside?
It's quite busy, a notebook, a checkered wristband, some biscuits, a metal tankard, a pair of scissors, a comb, a few lighters, a pile of magazine clippings, some bloody razorblades and a couple of external hard drives made by LaCie
What must I carry in order to steal data from the company headquarters, get away with it, and sell the data for 1 million dollars?
Gatchaman had Gatchamaniacs, Sailor Moon had Moonies, Naruto had Narutards, what name is given to Strike Witches fanboys and fangirls?
What the hell is this crazy >>427 talking about?
No, no, the hair on my balls.
So, you want me to cut off your balls, right?
It smells delicious but its penis is much too big.
How would you describe Card Captor Sakura's vagina?
The one time Randy Marsh was famous.
When was the thousandth time that a penis entered your anus, >>430?
Yume Miru Kusuri, for a grand total of twenty times. Yeah, I went through a LOT of tissue.
What is the most intellectually stimulating piece of literature you have ever read?
I think it's time we left.
He went down to the basement after he knocked you out with that weird drug, saying something about how he's finding "bigger toys"... older brother, what do you think we should do? He left the door unlocked!
The real question is, why not yourself?
Why doesn't anybody love me?
Get your neck massaged.
What should I do when my girlfriend dumped me? She used to make tender love, if you know what you mean.
You should consider not watching any TV for a week then, this could end dangerous.
I've bought this TV set on ebay. I tried to watch news on it but as a result I suffered a grand mal seizure and then killed a person with an axe. What should I do about it?
Let it go, maaaan.
What kind of teens aren't just an edgy little bundle of angst?
"Is this a dagger which I see before me?"
After all that anticipation, all I got was a boypive. Should have known that girlpives would sell out less than three hours after release.
I found this old inscription, "☊☊☋☊" can you translate it?
I am pretty sure that that is beyond the purview of most physical therapy, sorry.
>>577
What's it called when two rickshaws drive toward each other?
>579
Make sure it can't tie a bowline knot.
>598
Whose responsible for poor decision making?
>>600
I can't speak for anyone else, but I have reasons to keep it there.
I've been skipped! I think I've slipped into a crack in time!
Hi guys
I remember speaking to someone from your company about the global vape shop database I am using for my ejuice brand.
I think this is the link to the official sales page: https://bit.ly/2V3ZKAU
I could of course send you my copy of the database but I think it is best if you get your own copy to get all the latest updates.
I hope that helps.
>>737 Why can't Latin America have nice things?
>739 you have two choices, and neither of them look good.
>>759 What does the CMD in my computer stand for?
>761 Eat it, vomit, then eat it again.
>>772 The video game I want got delayed again. When will the video game company tell another lie about when the game goes on sale?
>>775 The computing power of the latest Samsung cell phone combined with the durability of the Nokia 3310.
>>786 Nekopara made a fortune. How can we make a fortune on a sequel?
>788 Xi Jinping getting the Coronavirus.