[Time travel]Answer the question of the person below you! PART TWO! (791)

1 Name: heh man!fi.Jek4HW6!!gGKYHXFO : 1993-09-5546 21:59

>>0, why are you in the refrigerator?

>>2, I have no advice at this time.

2 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5546 23:20

What makes me want to slit your throat so badly?

That case was a landslide victory for the Jews, and it looks like we have bigger problems than berserked-out lumberjacks.

3 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5547 00:37

What happened when the media covered the case of the 1000 rabid lumberjacks?

That is because you used the wrong hole.

4 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5547 15:45

Why is my cock brown?

I'm tellin' ya man, REPTOIDS! R-E-P-T-O-I-D-S-!

5 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5547 22:56

Oh my god, who slaughtered my dog?!

Apply some essence of the knowledge on your forehead.

6 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5548 00:22

why does thinking cause me so many headaches?

It is like 100 gallons of ball sweat.

7 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5548 21:17

How is life on Jupiter?

It's so creamy.

8 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5549 21:38

I wonder what childbirth is like?

Just give up, it wasn't meant to be.

9 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5550 01:22

I try to pull out all the hair from my armpits, but they keep growing back. What do I do?

jait

10 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5550 19:36

Why don't you ever make any sense?

Wear it and girls will peep at you!

11 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5550 23:42

what are those funny pants with no zipper or buttons for?

12 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5550 23:46

Negative number IQ.

13 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5550 23:54

What's wrong with >>11 and >>12?

I could tell you, but then I'd have to hug you. For some reason not a lot of people like hearing the truth from me.

14 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5563 09:21

Hey, got spare coin for a helpless bum?

I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly. C´mon!

15 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5570 20:44

why do you drool when you look at me?

The opposite of TANASINN

16 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5570 22:10

Who is responsible for all bad things in the world?

Oh, this slot is for coins. You should use another slot.

17 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5571 00:20

I want to buy a soda... But for some reason it's not accepting my dollar bill...

Your awareness slowly fades, and soon after you feel as though you've been ravaged by a thousand angry eels. Then you get pie.

18 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5573 21:07

I think I had an out of body experience, but just to be sure, what is one usually like?

Don't worry about it, it should just wash out.

19 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5574 01:04

I just got jizz on my pillow case, what should I do? :(

Ramen is for bitches, real men eat beef rice.

20 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5574 01:06

I'm hungry, but I want to look like a man.

Oh god. That is just sick.

21 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5575 23:57

Did you hear about the Yakin Byoutou cosplayers?

American women learn Sumo wrestling.

22 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5579 19:20

Did you hear? They finally found a way to make Americans feel good about being morbidly obese!

Only sometimes, and even then, only sparingly.

23 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5579 22:37

When a tourist goes to Japan, what are the odds of meeting a woman that looks like Miyabi Hayama?

The second shittiest animu.

24 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5580 10:26

What is your opinion of Clannad?

My little sister's chest meat.

25 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5580 12:53

What is the flattest surface on earth?

Dogs will bark at your presence.

26 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5580 23:10

How do I get toOH GOD I'M NOT GOOD WITH COMPUTERS ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿ ͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇͇̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿̿

Try ↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A. It might help.

27 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5580 23:43

What do I do to see Lara Croft naked?

Sounds like she should have eared on the side of caution.

28 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 02:29

Did you hear the story about the girl who put her ear against the train track to hear the train?

Finishing a race in 4,129,070,619th place.

29 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 05:03

How bad did the losingest loser lose the race, anyway?

Knowing French in a room full of Spanish speakers.

30 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 11:23

What does it feel like when you are standing in a line waiting for the new iPhone and everyone around you speak russian?

Its like that time when one jewish furry shouted "Muzzle Paw!"

31 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 17:09

Is Annie Hall a good film?

Please reread what you just asked.

32 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 18:11

omg so hoe do i maek suar tat cat is phone??????

Only when speaking to a police officer.

33 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 18:40

Have you ever been in love?

You can use my gluestick.

34 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5581 22:50

Help! The world is infested with construction paper zombies!

In fact, I haven't eaten one of those in a month.

35 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5582 03:27

I was told that strawberry Pocky is the most addictive food on earth. Is that true?

It is like falling anus first on an erect horse penis.

36 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5582 16:30

What is the first kiss like?

You'll feel better with your pants pulled down.

37 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5582 20:16

Why do I keep getting an uncomfortable wet feeling when I stand in front of porcelain bowls?

Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.

38 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5583 03:47

Oh man, I just heard this great song on the radio about a horse with no name. Isn't discovering new things great?

Actually, it was The Four Lads.

39 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5604 04:02

Hey, were you aware that those fuckin' TMBG posers bit "Istanbul" from The Four Tops?

Because both of >>38's sentences are about 40-50 year old music.

40 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5604 04:24

What was it about this thread that made you want to bump it?

Yes, I know, it was actually released in 1972

41 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 03:09

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvoD8TiW5OQ&feature=related

What being an otaku 20 years ago was like.

42 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 03:27

What's Otaku No Video about?

I say we come up with a plan to assassinate him.

43 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 09:58

Obama? What about him?

We need more Jell-O and cucumbers.

44 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 12:54

anything you want me to pick up at the store, dearie?

well of course there were three, what did you expect?

45 Name: heh man!fi.Jek4HW6!!gGKYHXFO : 1993-09-5607 16:47

Why were there three?

stop that

its silly

46 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 17:27

Yo dawg, do you like cars?

I don't know, I know it's made with soya stuff, but I don't actually know what else.

47 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5607 17:42

Man, soylent green is really good. I wonder what its made of?

Just keep doing what you're doing. More ladies in chainmail bikinis couldn't hurt though.

48 Name: Piyoko the Tripfag : 1993-09-5607 20:53

    __
  '´   ヽ
●lカノノル ピノ●
  从 ゚ ヮ゚ ノソ  Pyo, does that feel good, pyo? Shall I hammer it some more, pyo?
 ⊂[]二[]つ        
   / B ヽ
  <     >
   (/ ∪



    __
  '´   ヽ
●lカノノル ピノ●
  从 ゚ ヮ゚ ノソ  It's in my underpants, pyo.
 ⊂[]二[]つ  Please make it stop licking my butt, pyo.
   / B ヽ
  <     >
   (/ ∪

49 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5615 02:06

What happened to my pet lizard once it got out of its cage?

It is like watching every episode of Gatchaman without taking a break.

50 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5615 05:11

I'm thinking of trying ecstasy. What should I expect?

Technically, you can, but you better stock up on adult diapers first.

51 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5615 15:02

    __          
  '´   ヽ         
●lカノノル ピノ●       
  从 ゚ ヮ゚ ノソ   Can I stock up on laxatives now, pyo?
 ⊂[]二[]つ  That's not a poteto, pyo. Stop now, pyo.
   / B ヽ         
  <     >         
   (/ ∪

52 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5615 16:51

What should I do with this poteto that I'm slicing into Franch Frais?
Silly dokyuun, there are no girls there!

53 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5615 17:54

HAY ANY HAWT CHIKS WANNA HOOK UP 19/M/USA

It was only available as a b-side on the blue-vinyl 7" of The Blues Are Still Blue.

54 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5628 17:36

Did Belle & Sebastian really record the Internationale?

They already have that in the UK.

55 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5629 02:59

I went up the road to New York the other day, and i drove around a weird circle road thing, god it was confusing! I asked a policeman and he said it was a "roundabout"! Have you ever heard of anything so crazy in your life?

It's where you break half a custard cream and half a chocolate bourbon biscuit, and press the creamy halves together. It works with oreos too.

56 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5629 11:59

    __          
  '´   ヽ         
●lカノノル ピノ●       
  从 ゚ ヮ゚ ノソ   What the fuck is the Shocker, pyo?
 ⊂[]二[]つ  8/f/Analogue, pyo.
   / B ヽ         
  <     >         
   (/ ∪

57 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5629 18:05

Hmm, you're a pretty sexy plug. What are your specs?

I coulda swore I told you, they're ex-humans who lost their humanity in some freak accident and ended up with that particular deviation.

58 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5629 21:48

Zombies?! You damn scientists didn't tell us that they're motherfucking zombies?!

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!

59 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5634 19:30

You know, we were all pretty drunk and phone and me just saw her and... Hey it's not personal, mate! There's no need to break up with her!

Interesting, considering your love for big boobs. Oh, the phone's ringing... Yes? Hello? Yeah, Freud here!

60 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5635 23:51

Hi, this is Jung, is Siggy there?

It was simply a terrible set up, it's not like you could have done any better.

61 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5636 14:58

Do you hate me for cumming too fast?

Oh lord, you're such a knobhead... Of course not!

62 Name: Lord Pentium!gcmLJO5D4c : 1993-09-5636 15:20

Is Arudou Debito a genius?

Try some Xanax and some Zoloft, it really helped my friend.

63 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5636 15:52

An idea about how to get rid of sudden erections?

Your parents already told me so.

64 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5637 22:40

How did you know I was such a nerd?

The placebo effect on steroids

65 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5652 01:54

What is the most slippery slippery slope argument?

The greatest invention before sliced bread.

66 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5652 05:53

How would you describe a bread knife?

He's been posting replies to himself all that time, using lines from Morrissey's We'll Let You Know

67 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5652 20:27

Who is that strange dude over there, and why does he look so mad?

It's like jazz run over by a japanese steam-powered steamroller through a broken amp.

68 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5652 20:37

What are Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra like live?

That's what I meant by "It's been done"

69 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5657 08:07

Hey guys! I'm going to fansub the newest movie!

Like being hit by an attractive lady.

70 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5657 14:54

What's it like to be hit by an attractive lady?

It's an emergency, there's no more "Wait and see"

71 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 02:07

I wonder what happens when we run out of mittens... let's find out?

I was thinking of an image macro and trying not to laugh.

72 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 08:52

Why were you giggling at your husband's funeral?

Nah, I'm not really into pokemon.

73 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 13:28

Have you tried the new Ubuntu release?

I don't mind when you come round, though if it's the weekend I just might be in bed

74 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 13:31

Hey man, do you like Ubuntu?

Aw man, i totally hate it. Seriously.

75 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 17:12

You know when you're making out on your sofa with your girl, and the phone rings and it's her dad, but she then tells you her dad died a long time ago?

Yeah, he used to be such a sweet boy, holding so tightly to his daddy's hand

76 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5663 22:38

>>75, I heard you knew Hillary Clinton when she was a kid.

No you can't, the cat just gets stuck, and it never works quite right after that.

77 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5664 01:08

Can't we just suck it out?

Oh my God. Its full of stars

78 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5664 01:11

Look, I cut a gash in my belly with a scalpel, is this awesome y/n?

Give in to the pressure, the cop's gonna get you

79 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5664 03:36

Should I prove EVO IS NO.1 on the public road?

Nitromethane plus Nitrous Oxide

80 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5664 21:37

How the fuck can the Flash make clothes out of thin air?

its pronounced E-JIT

81 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5665 02:44

My Scottish friend keeps calling me "idjit" in messages to me, what does it mean? I think it's an insult

The more you ignore him, the closer he'll get

82 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5665 18:18

Am I wasting my time with him? Look at him, he's fallen asleep with his head on the bar. Should I just forget him and find someone else?

Yeah, let me in please

83 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5665 21:09

Hello this is the tanasinn chamber. If you enter you must leave your shadow with us, and you may never return to the outside world. Would you like to enter?

I will take 5 of those please.

84 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5665 21:51

Even though they are cheaper in bulk, they remain quite horrible... Are you sure you want to order a bonsai kitten, sir?

You must construct additional pylons.

85 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5666 00:35

How do I make my penis bigger?

King Arthur.

86 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5670 23:13

Who was the British geologist that discovered a very unique rock formation?

Because she ate all the donuts at the Krispy Kreme.

87 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 12:28

Why did Diana really die?

Meat, and lots of it. That is the only way.

88 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 13:37

How could I help Morrissey be a more commercially successful recording artist?

At least think about the implications!

89 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 15:42

I have the ability to make DQN the world's most popular website, therefore I should, right?

It's the only reason why I bother getting up at all in the morning.

90 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 15:58

Am I the only one who thinks sleep is the best thing in the world?

Try relaxing your anus.

91 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 16:14

Is there anything I can do to improve my dance style?

Hot peppers, onions, tomatoes, and light mayo.

92 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 16:20

I'm interested in a great sub, but one that sets me apart as a ladies man - any suggestions?

Listen to them - they are more experienced.

93 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5671 22:20

The voices in my head keep telling me to kill myself! What should I do?

Yes, with the possible exception of chocolate pudding.

94 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5672 00:30

Is it weird for my food to be the same color in my feces?

Two boxes of Cheerios and a carton of milk.

95 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5672 02:15

So let me get this straight - you took on the entire North Korean army and won, while armed only with WHAT?

Because it's winter.

96 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5672 18:25

Why is it only 65 degrees and all the plants are green?

I want to take it easy.

97 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5672 20:00

Why did you favourite this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKrTGBq74wg&feature=related

She's a good girl, ain't she?

98 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 00:27

Have you seen that lead singer of Tokio Hotel?

I was thinking about something from my childhood.

99 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 00:56

Holy fuck, your paintings are disturbing, to say the least. What inspires you?

Yeah, one's viagra, and one's like sudafed or something, you leave them in an envelope somewhere for someone to pick them up lol

100 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 01:01

Why did you scream and run away when you saw that church guy?

Because he is a panda.

101 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 12:27

How can there be evidence supporting claims that Jesus was both black AND white?

11 year olds, from what I hear.

102 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 15:54

What is this year's hot new trend?

The third trimester is the new 18, so they say

103 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5673 19:27

What's with so many students killing themselves before third trimester starts?

It's the law, I'm afraid. You're coming with me.

104 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5674 17:12

Can't a man masturbate alone in the privacy of his home?

Infinity-plus-one.

105 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5674 20:18

How many days are there in September?

I'm afraid DQN's character count per post is insufficient to answer this question. You should probably read the book "電波男" by Tooru Honda if you really want to know.

106 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5675 14:47

I need to know what the fist 5000 words in "電波男" by Tooru Honda are. Can someone post them for me?

I doubt it, your sister was the same.

107 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5683 23:03

Are there girls not totally fascinated by those stupid rocks stars created by Disney?

It is like being bukkake'd by guys with erectile dysfunction.

108 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5684 11:58

What does it feel like to have twelve garden snakes right in front of your face?

That's why you don't hire statisticians to mow your lawn.

109 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5684 14:09

What the! Why is my lawn shaved down to a bell curve?

The first one is free, then they got ya hooked.

110 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5685 22:54

How do tobacco companies get more young people to smoke?

Saturday the 14th.

111 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5686 14:22

Do we have a date yet?

You wish!

112 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5688 21:48

Will there ever be a rainbow?

>>589

113 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5690 01:03

Who says "Oppai Oppai!" in that other thread?

114 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5690 19:44

Do you have a question about that other thread?

Because it's written in LISP.

115 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5691 10:05

Everthing I read aloud in thith post thounds like thith. Whatth up with that?

Seven, if you keep them warm.

116 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5695 21:03

With current advances in medical science, how many donor penises could I graft onto my body without succumbing to rejection or infection?

That's a really good idea, you should try definitely try that, but let me get my digital camera first so I can capture this moment for future enjoyment or cash prizes.

117 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5696 03:56

Should I fight Sigma without any armor upgrades aside from those fucking boots?

No. Everyone chooses him because they figure since it's about the holy sword, he's got to be the main character, but I don't give a shit how strong he is, since he's slow as fuck while Kevin is a double-hitting badass, despite being overshadowed by that flamboyant fangirl-magnet, Hawkeye.

118 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5698 15:23

I chose him because I figured that since it's about the holy sword, this dude's got to be the MC; and I'm telling ya he's powerful as fuck.
Never got round to using that Kevin dude yet though, wondering if he's any good. You reckon I should stick with my current guy?

If the price is right and the place is secure.

119 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5698 16:19

Should I go to a brothel downtown?

I, for one, welcome our new overlords.

120 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5702 01:11

What a fucking pain, I just want to spawn more zerglings, but this character limit forces me to spend precious minerals on floating brain-sheep. What do you think?

I would have to pick the sexy lady gremlin from Gremlins 2.

121 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5703 14:14

Did you or did you not take your medicine today?

Well, it depends on the shape and structure of the broken object.

122 Name: heh man!fi.Jek4HW6!!gGKYHXFO : 1993-09-5704 02:19

>>121, what would a broken object look like?

>>123, I don't like her because she's a BITCH.

123 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5704 05:09

Why don't you like my new shetland sheepdog puppy?

Yeah, I got your "positional stabilizer" right here, pal.

124 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5704 11:24

Did you get the cock ring I sent you the other day?

That's old enough for me.

125 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5704 15:09

Old enough to pee?

Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun

126 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5705 21:49

Have you ever been in Bangkok at twelve o'clock, foamed at the mouth and run?

You can do that, but be be prepared to clean up a big mess afterwards if you do.

127 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5705 23:43

Should I eat 12 packs of Metamucil?

Because much to my own sadness, Reimu will never be as popular as that slut Marisa.

128 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5706 09:57

Why can't you play Embodiement of the Scarlet Devil without crying?

Well, I don't think you've much experience in dealing with the Zulus.

129 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 00:09

In Civilization III, I'm trying to get Writing off of the Zulu, who have a much weaker military than I do. I have nothing to trade, so I'm demanding it. What am I doing wrong?

You don't want to hang out with them, they're all gay or transvestites.

130 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 02:16

Do you think I should post in the "[Gay] In this thread we call the previous poster gay or a transvestite [Transvestites]" thread?

That's actually just a Frisbee.

131 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 04:41

What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?

The head of John the Baptist.

132 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 04:47

What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?

Everyone thinks they're so great because they take cute pictures that you can put on the internet, but in reality they're always bitchy and mean and just generally suck as pets.

133 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 07:21

Why do people like cats?

What the hell is that thing coming out of my dog's ass?

134 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 14:17

How can you fail at a thread so badly?

Take six Tylenol 3s, two Robaxacet, and two anti-histamines. Call me when you wake from your coma.

135 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 20:14

...

June 6th, 1901, that's the same day Hitler had a one-night stand with Churchill

136 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5708 22:14

When the hell did that thing come out of my dog's ass?

The cure for that has been with you all along.

137 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5709 04:44

/k/ommando here, Lately I've been so depressed. Any one know of a good way to cure depression?

Lesbian Monkeys from Outer Space!

138 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5709 08:12

What are your thoughts on the the Bonobos and what is your theory as to why they are only found in the Democratic Republic of Congo?

I don't know, go ask Squeeks

139 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5709 18:54

WWSD?

A shaven monkey prostitute.

140 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5709 21:18

Goddamnit, I can't get an erection off from normal porn. What helps you get off easily?

This society's like totally corrupt'n'shit. Like, you know, big corporations are ruining our like spirituality and stuff, like totally...

141 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5709 23:26

I never wanted my multimillion dollar job. Should I quit now and become a hippie?

Wrap it up in toilet paper, and flush it down.

142 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5710 05:16

What should I do with this dead horse?

I don't think Squeeks is ever coming back.

143 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5710 21:59

I got a postcard from Squeeks that just said "Greetings from Mexico!" Do you thing he'll bring me a present?

That's between you and God.

144 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5712 23:51

Why does God hate me?

A monkey with fours asses.

145 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5713 00:09

What happens when deranged morons get genetic modification machinery?

William the pigeon

146 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5713 04:29

Who was the least respected medieval English king?

Twist it up, smoke it down, lah-de-dah-de-dah

147 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5713 05:05

What I did with the medical herbs my friend gave me.

Marksmanship, how to dress a kill, tracking, navigation, and edible plant identification.

148 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5713 10:26

What are the 5 most important skills for an airline pilot?

Too much tanasinn. Think more, feel less.

149 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5714 00:39

Tanasinn?

You'd think the crowbar would have done the job, but no, it didn't even make a noticeable difference.

150 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5714 03:27

What did you do to that dead body?

Death is the only answer.

151 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5714 09:58

What spell should I use to fill up my last black mage slot?

No, no, a thousand times, NO!

152 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5714 19:32

So, would watching Crazy Dave Tape be time well spent?

I can't believe that the Japanese never thought of it first.

153 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5839 00:14

An all wheel drive car with an inline six engine

shooting laser beams from the eyes

154 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5839 23:02

Is it possible to cure rectal cancer?

No, that's awful. You should be ashamed of yourself.

155 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5840 01:43

Was my question for the eye lasers answer any good?

It's not like the dogs would know the difference. Go for it.

156 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5840 03:21

I want to get plastic surgery so that I look like one of the orcs from the LotR movies, but I'm worried that my friends might disapprove. Should I?

You must use a pair of tweezers to very, VERY carefully remove the foreign object.

157 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5840 22:29

I think the coke-filled condom up my ass is broken, what should I do?

You know that just might work. A little more nail polish and, yeah.

158 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5841 19:26

I'm trying to fake my own death, will this dummy constructed out of trash bags and carpet samples convince the insurance company and my six wives?

I think it's just there for decorative purposes.

159 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5842 16:23

There's a gigantic cave spider in my room, what the fuck?

You burn it into a Blu-Ray disc.

160 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5844 01:43

A hacker put a virus on my computer, what should I do?

AIDS and cancer at the same time.

161 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5844 02:36

Final solution for USER heh man!fi.Jek4HW6 and other distasteful miscreants?

You're right, I am awesome.

162 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5845 03:39

Why are there three gigantic tentacle penises emerging from your pants?

Sorry, we don't stock those, but we do have this lovely sledgehammer.

163 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5845 18:25

Have you seen my Mjolnir lying about?

Frankly, squeeks, I'm amazed you've survived without it this long.

164 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5846 21:48

   __    
 ( ・∀・) < My name is Squeeks and
 (つ   つ   where is my hat?
 | | |     
 (__)_)

Sometimes, you just need a hug.

165 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5849 20:20

Why did you give twenty dollars to that daytime prostitute?

Well, if you want to risk needing a colostomy bag for the rest of your life, it might be fun.

166 Name: Lord Pentium!PG1mP76kIY : 1993-09-5851 04:49

How does it feel to sodomize yourself with a tree branch?

As far as I'm concerned, he should have never had that status in the first place.

167 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5853 21:25

What is your opinion of President Obama?

4 first class plane tickets from Tampa to Tokyo on Christmas Eve, followed by a rented Nissan GT-R, and a shopping trip with some Ganguro girls in Roppongi and Shibuya.

168 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5855 02:12

Try to find something better than mittens. Go on, I dare ya.

I dunno, something that walks on four legs in the morning, I guess.

169 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5855 15:46

what has become of today's youth!?

not unless you're able to properly pronounce the words fennesz, reburf and wareruride

170 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5855 17:36

Do you think I'll be able to pass my tri-lingual math test?

iichan could help you with that.

171 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5856 00:19

Is there a slower textboard than here?

The world.

172 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5856 11:39

Aaah you know, that guy with the steamroller and then he shouts and goes WRYYY and... damnit, I really can't remember what it was called!

Well maybe if you count the corpses, too.

173 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5856 19:24

Overall, would you say the happiness of the Chinese people increased dramatically as a result of the Great Leap Forward?

FYAD

174 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5857 23:13

So, what is the name of your immigrant co-worker?

You can use a toothpick for that, just make sure to remove pointy sides.

175 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5858 00:25

My eye itches, what do I scratch it with?

A herd of /b/tards.

176 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5858 00:53

Whats worse than a /b/tard?

Dead men tell no tales.

177 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5858 23:29

This storyteller is boring me to death with his boring stories. What should I do.

The same as giving gloves to mitten lovers.

178 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5859 01:51

>>177 What does it feel like to give fake money to the homeless?

>>178 A toothpick, a cellphone, and a roll of Scotch tape could do the trick.

179 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5859 05:02

Could you answer your own question? Alternatively, how would MacGyver make a bug?

What? No, it's nothing like that ...

180 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5859 06:47

>>179
Dude, are you hitting on my mom!?

>>181
A yandere Jehovah witness chick. It's cute until she slits your throat with this month's issue of Watchtower.

181 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5860 20:34

>>180
Which kind of girl would be great for me?

>>182
Stab a black man.

182 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5861 23:57

How do i ensure that 1 less Obama vote is cast in 2012?

183 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5861 23:57

Because someone outside the guiness book of records records that number.

184 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5862 21:12

>>183
Why can't I find a count of how many times you've fucked up and will fuck up this thread in the guiness book of records?

Because you're fucking nuts.

185 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5863 12:21

Why don't people appreciate my blood paintings? http://Crinkle-CutBeatroot.deviantart.com/art/Long-Walk-Home-127590660 (Please click full view)

Try some progressive jumpstyle.

186 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5864 13:54

How can I get better at DDR?

Laser.

187 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5864 18:30

I think cats are pretty cool as they are, how could we possibly improve on god's cuddliest creature?

I don't think you're my type, but if I'm ever looking to experiment I'll let you know.

188 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5865 02:08

I need a mad scientist who can build diabolical devices to further my schemes of world domination. Interested?

North, West, South, West.

189 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5865 19:27

What are the directions to get to the superstructure from the haunted forest?

Find that heh man dude, he'll know.

190 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5865 20:04

What is it like to be a namefag and tripfag?

191 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5865 23:12

Does this question have an answer?

Write it on paper, and we'll see.

192 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5874 23:56

How do I solve Fermat's Last Theorem?

It's called skull fucking, dummy.

193 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5875 00:50

Wh..what are you doing to squeeks!?

When I bought it the cashier winked at me.

194 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5875 01:20

What was it like to die at Yoshinoya?

Red Mage, Fighter, Thief, White Mage. It's just how I roll.

195 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5875 07:35

Which of your Final Fantasy themed D20s will we be using at today's session?

Mr. Pibb. Lots of Mr. Pibb.

196 Name: MODD!3GqYIJ3Obs : 1993-09-5875 09:00

How do I wax my chest?

A single dolphin.

197 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5875 16:07

When I cross sedate lions for an immortal porpoise, what should I give it?

Five tons of flax.

198 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5875 19:14

Hey mom what's for dinner?

No, they were only 5$.

199 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5876 04:26

>>195
I admit. I laughed.

Anyways, as for >>198

Did you have to pay tax for that sub?

I would, but then I'd have to flip your skirt.

200 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5876 09:48

Could you loan me five dollars?

Your idiot brain couldn't comprehend it anyway.

201 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5876 12:32

Why didn't you tell me how Clonepa was made?

He was the other guy all along.

202 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5877 01:55

How did that yaoi about the schizophrenic end?

Thirty-seven.

203 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5877 16:47

What is the meaning of life, the universe, and logical positivism?

It's merely an algorithm which injects vowels into randomized consonant clusters in a statistically sound way, giving the appearance of pronounceable words for ease of cognitive processing without being so entirely predictable as to be easily mirrored by a similar engine or to fall susceptible to a dictionary attack. Any resemblance to real words is purely coincidental and not worth celebrating.

204 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5877 18:04

What is a left-leaning political columnist?

I recommend the nine iron.

205 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5877 22:21

What dull implement should I use to club you to death with? It should have enough reach that I don't get any of your filthy blood on me.

No, they should all be euthanized.

206 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5878 00:39

Should we protect the retarded children?

The stealthy assassin of old people.

207 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5878 19:58

Who was that funny black dude I saw on the TV the other day?

He is that guy who used to troll world2ch/world4ch and whatnot, I think he was also a rejected goon.

208 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5879 01:03

Who is moot?

Because you can't relax around him or his bans.

209 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5879 09:23

Why shouldn't I resurrect Draco, the ancient Greek lawmaker?

Just add Spartans.

210 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5880 01:25

How do I turn a shitty video clip into a successful Youtube phenomenon?

Cloning Debito Ardou.

211 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5880 09:48

What would result in the destruction of Japan as we know it?

Aids.

212 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5880 21:56

I need some help around the office, who should I hire?

Really, ethnocentrism is like a circus, and otherwise respectable cultures are the biggest clowns of all.

213 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5880 22:11

Do you think Asians are cool?

By typing "DESU".

214 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 00:14

How can I make everyone hate me in the quickest way possible?

Displacement is vital to the process.

215 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 00:44

What do I need to find an object's average velocity?

Lots and lots of vodka.

216 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 03:29

What do I need to observe a Russian at maximum velocity?

It didn't come with a kitchen.

217 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 05:16

Why did you send your new computer back? I really don't get what your problem is, it worked just fine!

Exactly. Just like the giant heads made from metal standing in the cornfield, on the Pink Floyd cover.

218 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 09:33

So, Jeremy Clarkson looks like either the Easter Island heads or what now?

No way in hell there's six of them left after tonight.

219 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5881 18:38

What would happen if every country in the world had large stockpiles of nuclear weapons starting yesterday?

The large, tangled mess of cords under one of the couches in the basement.

220 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5882 15:24

Is there any evidence I forgot to get rid of?

I had to chew it thoroughly.

221 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5882 22:11

What would sex would look like if it were made out of mud and frozen decomposing undergrowth?

But I don't want to suck his cock to keep my legs.

222 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5882 23:35

Your question to >>220s answer was horrible, >>221. You can make it up to him or I can cut off your legs, which do you want?

Lithuanians, lots and lots of Lithuanians.

223 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5883 00:13

If the whole world flooded, what would humanity use to soak it all up?

Press 9 three times and then dial the number you wish to call.

224 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5884 00:39

How do I bring Squeeks back from the dead?

Protip: Cast Beat and Defeat.

225 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5884 23:53

I really don't get it... What am i supposed to do, now that she's dead? I feel like i don't want to live anymore...

Leave me the fuck alone!

226 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5885 18:51

Hi, I was just wondering, would you please take this box full of money? It is perfectly legal and duty-free, I just don't want it anymore.

A hundred million, a million trillion stars up in the sky.

227 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) kyaaaaa!!JJYYs87i : 1993-09-5885 22:37

What are those specks of light that are always above us at night?

228 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5885 22:41

Why are you just staring at me like that, not saying anything?

Münchausen by proxy syndrome

229 Name: ( * ヮ*) : 1993-09-5886 07:37

What do you get if you put a hamster in a blender that plays classical, German music?

JEWS.

230 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5886 12:54

wud do you maked from crudged oranges?

Then that makes the panhandle the testicles!

231 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5886 15:26

Why do so many Bible thumpers live in the Florida Panhandle?

Death by having to smell someone else's farts.

232 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5886 20:50

What is your deepest, darkest sexual fantasy?

Sorry, I must have made a typo. wink

233 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5887 20:14

You want to have sex with children?

It's the Rwandan national pastime!

234 Name: ( ˃ ◡˂) : 1993-09-5887 22:34

What's so special about a rectal exam anyways?

Male genitalia of the tiny type.

235 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5888 01:14

What do you see in the mirror when you undress for a shower?

SNOOPING AS USUAL, I SEE.

236 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5888 11:43

Yo dizzle bizzles, I'm just chilaxing with the gizzles here in mah chizzle. Preach.

I doubt it, but you should consult a doctor just to be sure.

237 Name: ( * ヮ*) : 1993-09-5888 13:13

Did you give me AIDS last night?

Thunderwhistles.

238 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5889 13:00

What did you install on my toilet?

i know it's too late but in future scan keygens etc with www.virustotal.com, virusscan.jotti.org or novirusthanks.com

239 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5889 23:33

OMG my halo keygen i got of teh interwebs was a virus! WAT DO?

Seriously man, you have to stop doing that.

240 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5890 00:57

I bought Halo the other day, you should buy it too, maybe we could play?

THAT is my trump card.

241 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5890 01:39

I see you have a photo of your neighbor with some other guys dick in his mouth. Why do you have it?

A house without a roof

242 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5890 18:22

I didn't want to pay for a whore, so I tried pirating one using a keygen. I ended up getting an STD from it. What do I do?

Double-sided tape.

243 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5891 00:34

I need to put an "I'm Stupid" sign on my face what do I use to keep it in place?

Mooning a bus full of retarded schoolchildren.

244 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5893 15:43

What is the best way to die?

Flying animatronic genitalia.

245 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5895 11:37

If you could chose any pet, any pet at all. Which one would you chose ?

The banshee says it's sorry but apart from that... I think you still have to take care of that tribute to the United Future Organization.

246 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5895 14:51

Dude, I hooked up with some girl last night after you guys left. Man you should have seen her, long blond hair, sad piercing eyes and nice tight body in a tighter white dress. She was a real screamer. I woke up next to my saxophone, she was gone. I was feeling pretty bad so I picked my sax and started to play a few notes. It sounded so dull and empty like I had no soul. I don't think I can go to the studio today, can you make up some excuse for me?

247 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5895 17:10

You look like you've seen a ghost; What in the hell happened to you last night?

Sorry, I'm legally blind.

248 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5896 23:52

That isn't a popsicle in my pants! What is your problem?

fuckballs

249 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5897 07:28

So, whatcha cookin'?

Can't let you do that, >>250.

250 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5900 14:00

HAL9000, will you please divide by zero?

You must type both into Googlefight.com and then you will get the correct answer.

251 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5922 02:10

What is faster, the speed of light or the speed of sound?

100 Yaoi fangirls with strap-on dildos.

252 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5922 16:06

So, who wants this gigantic crate of SUPA KAWAII NEKOMIMI ^________^ kitty-ear hairbands?

It's "aluminum," not "aluminium."

253 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5922 20:19

THE GOVERNMENT REPLACED ALL OF THE TIN FOIL WITH ALUMINIUM! IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY! THIS IS ALL A PART OF THEIR PLAN! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?!

Eh, what's a body or two gonna do for me in the long run?

254 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5922 23:47

The journey of 1000 miles begines with a single stiff.

Using a chainsaw to scratch your balls.

255 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5923 01:17

I tried scratching my testicles with an electric mixer and they STILL itch. What would be considered going off the deep end?

A gigantic pimple the size of Canada.

256 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5924 05:21

You know, having the world sitting on his shoulders year after year without end can't be good for poor old Atlas. Doesn't he get any sort of ailment on his back where the world is lying?

The stalest meme in the world.

257 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5926 05:11

If this isn't MADNESS, what is it?

Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.

258 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5926 11:17

What is Squeeks's hat made of, if not poo?

Sixteen of them.

259 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5926 12:13

How many Clonepa threads will have ended when we finally reach 1994?

No, it's eating up it's own ass. It just sucks.

260 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5927 19:43

Did anything interesting happen when I took a worm and made it into a circle?

Adam Powers juggling nitroglycerin

261 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5929 05:41

Who is Adam Powers? What feat will it take for me to have any interest in this person whatsoever?

SSSSSCIENCE!

262 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5929 15:17

How can I mix two black people in one?

What kind of question is that? Squeeks, obviously.

263 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5929 16:16

What exactly did you mean when you yelled "SHITHEAD" spontaneously?

You know, simply like this: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

264 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5929 21:00

What was the programmer's national anthem again?

It's simple: kill the hat man.

265 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5930 09:40

How can I get rid of Squeeks?

It's just a jump to the left.

266 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5931 17:08

Where is the landmine on this battlefield?

Randy Marsh porn

267 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5961 04:38

Could you please kill this thread with an answer nobody wants to know the question to?

Dicks. Dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks.

268 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5961 19:18

What is the plural of dick and can you say that again because I'm hard of hearing?

The essence of all that is evil.

269 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5962 16:51

If they served food at TEH REI'S DINOR, what would it be made from?

Yay! Let's dance! (>^_^)> ~(^.^~)

270 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5965 00:02

I'm drunk as hell, what should I do?

The greatest number of courics in a single day.

271 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5973 01:12

When an SSBBW takes a crap, what is it like?

TIMMMAYYYYY!!!

272 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5974 02:30

If I give you $20 will you pretend to be my friend?

Under the covers.

273 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5974 05:22

Best place to keep my personal Rei?

Trowel some into the dumpster out back and see what happens.

274 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5974 18:46

My dog is missing, have you seen it?

The milkman

275 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5977 00:18

Who is that guy that appears on old American television shows and works a job that no longer exists?

A performance enhancing drug that enables people to beat the toughest video games.

276 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5977 02:16

(・∀・) I've always wondered what types of pills grandpa's always taking.

(・∀・) It's sort of like a typewriter, but I think you only get one try before the cronies come a lookin'.

277 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5977 18:53

What is the Internet?

Only if you can outwit Security Kitten.

278 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5977 20:17

Is there a way I can steal food from Rei's Diner?

A beer filled vending machine in a High School.

279 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5983 18:31

( ゚ ヮ゚) Where did you put my mittens?

Fat would be the most concise way to put it.

280 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5983 21:26

How would you describe the beautiful existence that is the average DQN denizen?

Toothless, covered in chemical residue and accelerating through the stratosphere.

281 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5983 23:50

What happened to that guy that smoked a cigarette in the hazardous chemical factory?

An alternate reality where bamboo eat Pandas

282 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5999 18:38

If Stephen Colbert were God, what would the world be like?

Surprisingly, Canada

283 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5999 23:18

What's that place where milk comes in bags?

Aw, it just means she likes you.

284 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6000 00:26

Why did that girl put a dildo in my anus?

Alternative sausages.

285 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6000 02:45

What did those fucking hipsters eat for breakfast?

Pork Chop Sandwiches

286 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6000 03:08

I'm looking for new masturbation toys; what do you use?

I'd fuck that excrementially.

287 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6001 21:43

Kanu Unchou?

That man who is the de facto leader and owner of half of the western text boards.

288 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6002 01:22

Who is John Galt?

BREAK THE SUPPORT DISC

289 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6002 04:08

Say something that sounds like it has something to do with FF7 but actually has to do with something completely different, please?

That is not a good time to release the emergency mittens.

290 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6005 02:18

uh oh. The emergency mittens are on fire. This is bad, isn't it? What does it mean?

STRIKE ITS WEAK POINT FOR MASSIVE DAMAGE

291 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6005 02:57

A sexless pedophile has broken into my house. What should I do?

Stop making sense.

292 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6005 03:29

What will happen to the Elitist Superstructure as we get older?

It's a question of lust.

293 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6008 14:31

Should I go with Progressive or Esurance?

His middle name was engraved on the handle.

294 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6008 15:41

Holmes, do tell me, how was it that you found the murderer of my ex-wife?

You know as well as I do, >>295, that that is completely subjective.

295 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6011 13:21

Why are you ugly as hell?

The only bad thing about Kirby for the NES/Famicom

296 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6013 01:18

I wonder if I'll have to fight that stupid penguin again?

Because our busdriver is a crackhead

297 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6013 17:22

Why the hell are we driving off this cliff?

Because you touch yourself too much.

298 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6013 17:28

Why did you encase my hands in concrete mittens?

That's quite simple, >>299, you need to apply the Laplace Transform on the step function.

299 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6013 21:56

I wave a magic wand around and yell "henshin" why can't I turn in to a magic wielding heroine?

The anime that did for the 2000s what Neon Genesis Evangeilon did for the 1990s.

300 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6014 01:04

What's Pokemans?

The ID thread in /iaa/...

301 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6067 23:40

What is http://www.random.org/ good for?

In an amazing twist, it carried out but was not w.

302 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6069 01:34

Help! Someone stole one of the keys on my keyboard!

I pressed the easy button again.

303 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6070 01:11

Why does my easy button have a dead battery?

the dumbest magic spell ever cast.

304 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6070 20:18

I'm playing FATAL, and the only spell I have is Bestow Sniffle.

I'm now going to kill myself.

305 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6070 22:44

How will you do your part to make the world a better place?

Give it some time and see if it gets any larger.

306 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6073 21:40

Why won't my monoboob grow? can i make it get bigger!!?

Don't keep clicking it, that won't make it go any faster.

307 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6076 02:00

I need to cross the street right now! How many times must I push the button?

A gun with a backwards barrel.

308 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6076 04:45

Who is this self-proclaimed "Captain Lerrab" idiot?

She's frosting a cake with a paper knife.

309 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6076 15:25

What makes you think she got into Grandpa's booze?

I'm sorry, please ask again later.

310 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6076 21:00

What makes you think she got into Grandpa's booze?

I blame >>523.

311 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6078 01:44

Who will make the dumb post that kills this thread?

The most explosive popcorn.

312 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6078 19:45

What is the number one cause of microwave-related deaths?

Without a thorough colonoscopy, all I can give is idle speculation.

313 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6078 20:37

What breed of mouse is currently inhabiting my anus?

I don't know, he sounded pretty gay to me.

314 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6078 21:41

Remember my flatmate, he used to wear those flowery shirts and listen to the Smiths? He married his girlfriend last week

They live in a dark, wet country ruled by girly-men.

315 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6079 01:54

Punjabs.

He has a lisp.

316 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6079 06:20

Why do you say that he sounded pretty gay to you?

He left an empty bottle of vodka in my room and didn't even offer to share.

317 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6079 23:48

How could you be sure it was Grandpa?

what is this I don't even

318 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6088 05:19

Any retarded channer shit you want to get out of your system?

Because I don't like playing Deus Ex.

319 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6088 12:12

Why are you a bad person?

Nah.

320 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6088 14:22

Should I save your mother from this boiling vat of oil?

So that's why I have a hangover.

321 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6089 00:53

Grandpa?

I just realized that Johnny Carson was doing this joke as "Carnac the Magnificent" on TV in the 1970s.

322 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6089 23:45

Why do you look so pensive after watching "That 70s show"?

The skinniest BBW.

323 Name: bilbo : 1993-09-6090 05:31

ur mom

Time! Time!

324 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6092 20:56

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

Because the previous poster is also a panda, that's why.

325 Name: da hobet : 1993-09-6093 22:32

Why didn't you get the reference?

Shut up and drink your coffee.

326 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6095 05:08

I have a serious caffeine allergy, do you think maybe you could call an ambulance?

Because I walk with a limp.

327 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6096 15:08

Hey, everyone else has a pet photoshop. Why don't you have a pet photoshop?

The only possible answer is Diet Pepsi.

328 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6096 20:55

How could we possibly power such an impossible contraption?

Meat would be the obvious answer.

329 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6097 23:48

What's that sweet and meaty smell?

Because there weren't enough let's-play-games-with-your-captcha threads.

330 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6099 21:23

Why were you angry after visiting DQN today?

Though it might be difficult at first, it is our only hope.

331 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6100 10:12

Must I truly go back in time to reverse the Eternal September?

Then don't drop it, dumbass.

332 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6101 00:19

If I drop this tune, it will literally set the dancefloor on fire!

It's only equalled by your lust for oreos.

333 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6101 15:30

What is your fascination with butter on bacon?

Ejaculating in a mayonnaise jar and giving it to someone else.

334 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6101 15:32

What is the dickest thing you've done so far?

Patchouli Knowledge.

335 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 02:36

What does that hippie jerkwad have that I</I don't, anyway?

A consolation ribbon.

336 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 10:12

What is something that is always better when written in italics?

If it is thought, then it must exist.

337 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 14:08

Does God exist?

They were originally planning to make tennis balls, but there was a mix-up and they got potatoes instead of rubber.

338 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 14:40

Why does my tennis racket turn tennis balls into french fries?

Anthro pigs and anthro elephants

339 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 21:50

What are the most common fetishes among chubby-chaser furries?

It carries out and is w.

340 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6102 23:25

What is the greatest thing a DQN can accomplish?

Teaching quantum mechanics to a 10 year old.

341 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6103 02:44

What is the greatest thing a DQN can't accomplish?

Hamilton Bleach.

342 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6103 03:50

Okay, so if Ichigo and Rukia go to new York and... Ah, fuck it, anyone else feel like doing this joke?

Only three, unless it's a weekend.

343 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6106 23:30

How many people are in your bed?

The synthesizer solo in "Europe - The Final Countdown"

344 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6122 19:44

What do you get if you cross the Doctor Who theme with a giant panda?

345 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6122 19:45

How can I answer silently?

Green, elongated cucumber jokes.

346 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6123 21:55

How do I win the heart of a cucumber?

An innecessary and terribly obscene amount of dicks.

347 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6124 12:56

>>346 What kind of graffiti is in the locker room of a gym?

348 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6124 19:09

Losersayswhat?

The doctor said it was treatable!

349 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6127 04:37

My condolences on losing your legs to advanced hikikomori's disease.

A bottle of bourbon, a Strike Witches boxed set, and a loaded handgun.

350 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6127 13:48

My little sister has a birthday next week, what should I give her?

Wait until it rains, and then pound on them a bunch of times with a rubber mallet.

351 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6128 03:10

Whats the best way to get rid of moles?

Engage according to operational parameters.

352 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6128 03:35

Bravo Sierra, this is Whiskey Tango. We have visual on the enemy. Please advise, over.

Playing Perfect Cherry Blossom while driving.

353 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6129 20:35

What was ZUN arrested for last year?

Fifteen flavours of jelly just weren't enough, I guess.

354 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6140 14:32

Why did that guy with OCD freak out in the 12th aisle in Sweetbay?

The dumbest superhero power that actually accomplished something.

355 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6144 07:33

What is Greyskull?

that part became very much like the ending of "Tears of Sun" movie for me... reteating like a motherfucker, mentally handicapped AI teammate is trying bravely to revive a friend and I'm bandaging myself, I even shot an APC... but so many fucking chinks man... going backward toward the evac point and shooting as many chinks as I can and a dramatic change to side arm and the complimentary AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

356 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6144 22:39

What was the most memorable thing about the Mario Kart game for you?

I personally think he did it just for spite.

357 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6159 00:37

Why did someone key into my car "I love you" ?

Dhalsim's dick

358 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6160 01:00

What did they use to rescue that little girl who fell into the well?

The easiest (and safest) way to check the difference is scent

359 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6160 06:57

I'm never quite sure when I pick my underwear off the floor if I should wear them again or throw them in the hamper.

fourteen point oh-five degrees kelvin

360 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6161 01:39

Some bar said they had the coldest beer in the world. Exactly how cold was it?

100 kegs of Rolling Rock beer.

361 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6165 20:29

What else does the AVGN own besides a shitty game collection?

Selling real flamethrowers in a children's toy store.

362 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6172 21:12

How can I effectively breed stupidity out of the human race now that the theory or practice of eugenics isn't cool anymore?

The same reason hip-hop 'artists' steal from classic rock songs and call it 'sampling'.

363 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6173 01:16

Why do Japanese language song have several English words in them?

Hidden underneath your mother's bed, and kept shut with a lock.

364 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6173 12:52

Where can I find a secret dildo collection?

If you're losing that much blood, it's probably better to go to a hospital.

365 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6173 14:26

Nonsense, it's only a flesh wound.

The secret is annealing at 250 C. for at least four hours afterward.

366 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6173 16:14

I tried to make a Fancy Hearing Cake and it tasted terrible! What could I have done wrong?

Put two of them in a cup.

367 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6176 03:33

I have a surplus of girls, what should I do with them?

The pages turn, the wheel spins, and the clock stops.

368 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6176 19:41

How do you feel, seeing your aunt naked?

I think it was around seventeen, maybe more

369 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6176 20:31

How old were you, the first time you saw your aunt naked?

Your aunt is now my sexual fetish.

370 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6176 22:57

My aunt just died. What now?

The yellow river in China.

371 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6176 23:02

Where does pee go when you flush?

Send a photo of that to the New York Times.

372 Name: 🔰!ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-6387 11:47

What should I do with the fanny bag that I just discovered on my belt?

Try talking sense into it. If it doesn't help then gnaw on it.

373 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6387 12:17

My antelope is stuck on 'shuffle' again!

That's kind of what you get for lending it to your dead cousin.

374 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6388 21:57

Why is that, after giving my guns to my insane and dead cousin, is he now plotting his revenge against me for my failure to revive him?

Yes, I do believe you manage to be even faggier than Relolia

375 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6443 00:41

Do I look fabulous or what?

Clockwise if you're in Europe, otherwise not even God can help you.

376 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6443 00:46

Which way do I go on this roundabout road?

North Korea's socialized medicine.

377 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6443 02:13

What resembles your typical HMO coverage except is way more honest about it?

I believe what I said at the time went something like "hurrrrr".

378 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6443 13:52

Why did you get on that roundabout road?

Every word of it is a lie, including "a," "an," and "the."

379 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6444 14:17

Have you heard that tale about a man, an plan the panama?

On 4-ch DQN we are all panda

380 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 15:44

So in your opinion, what do the members of DQN have in common?

All of it! The entire thing!

381 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 17:05

How much cake do you normally eat?

You have only yourself to thank.

382 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 17:13

Which people should I thank in my award ceremony speech?

Akhnaten, I guess.

383 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 20:43

Who's your phavorite pharaoh?

I got the idea when I saw Squeeks wearing the poo turban.

384 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 21:23

What possessed you to found your own religion?

Sort of like sycamore seeds.

385 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 22:32

What is the taste of sycaless seeds?

It's the direction of the ferret wheel.

386 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 22:57

What's the least helpful definition of the word "clockwise" that you can think of?

Ms Patchouli wants you to read her the SICP.

387 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6567 23:07

How can I learn more about Touhou?

Drifting a London bus.

388 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6568 06:34

What's the most ignoble stunt you've pulled lately, DQN?

The holy trinity of one part onions to two parts bell peppers and three parts celery.

389 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6568 09:22

What's the least appropriate thing imaginable to put in ice cream?

The secret is that there is no secret--it is exactly what it appears to be.

390 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6568 18:40

So what's the secret ingredient of your special tomato soup cake?

Well I do have a friend who made a giant phallus on Minecraft, if that counts.

391 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 02:09

What makes you so unique?

Another one bites the dust is not by michael jackson

392 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 08:07

What is your opinion on the latest Freddy Mercury authorship theory?

No more than forty-six. Unless we're talking about the lilac sort, then up to sixty-seven.

393 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 08:45

how many flowers can I stuff in my vagina?

Everybody in the world, except for the goddamn icelanders.

394 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 09:33

Who secretly hates ljuetfisk?

Bees. My God.

395 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 12:23

I poked this nest, what are those things coming out of it?

Butts man.

396 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 13:57

Who's that guy who got his superpowers from used cigarettes?

My right ankle.

397 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 15:57

What's for dinner?

Because it makes less of a mess.

398 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 16:22

Why would anyone have sex with a hollowed-out watermelon?

1924. It was a hell of a year!

399 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 19:51

Can you tell me about the years before 1993?

Knee socks.

400 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 19:58

Which protective tool that should be worn at all times is not as good as mittens?

It's a hell of a ride.

401 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 20:37

Is it fun to ride a magic broom?

Anii.

402 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 21:43

If you were to describe all tripcode users in a single word, what would it be?

Probably about 15%. Best case scenario, 20%.

403 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6569 22:52

How many of the websites you visit do you think wouldn't get you in trouble with the law?

You should probably start by admitting your mother isn't fit to be a psychotherapist.

404 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6570 00:14

I have ADHD and I want to go to the therapy, but my mother won't let me. What should I do?

It's funny, because there is no reason to escape.

405 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6570 04:00

Help! Beautiful women have locked me in this room and rape me! How do I get out?!

Because that was MY kitten, asshole!

406 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6571 05:38

Why are you so mad about the kitten I just snorted ?

We're fucked either way.

407 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6571 08:50

So, will you vote for Kang or for Kodos in the next election?

Eighty-seven.

408 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6571 18:06

I don't see why you would even need a term for a sixty-niner with eighteen people. What did you call it anyway?

My darling waifu.

409 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6571 20:16

Who is that morbidly obese woman with the varicose vein and the two club feet?

Dogs. Lots and lots of dogs.

410 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6572 02:29

What can I find at the Korean all you can eat buffet?

The sequel to HumancentiPad.

411 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6578 13:00

The smoking Crackberry

Izumu movies

412 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6638 21:11

Where are all the Japanese BBW?

The Didovics play battleshits.

413 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6639 19:00

So, how's schizophrenia working out for you?

Get out of my house!

414 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6639 19:18

Hey, stranger. Where's a bum go to take a shit in this place?

It's not my fault, my penis exploded!

415 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6639 19:23

Why are you able to dress in women's clothing so easily?

The arrival of Megaman/Rockman X9.

416 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6639 20:23

What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?

All he said was "You'll know when you find it".

417 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6640 00:22

What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?

Take a deep breath, open the nearest book at a random page, poke into it and this will be your answer.

418 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6640 11:53

What could possibly be more exciting than learning about magnetohydrodynamics?

I can tell one thing for sure, Espeon has casted GAY MAGIC spell on you.

419 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6640 18:22

What could possibly be more exci-- no, never mind that. Haven't you ever gotten the urge to violently rape a pokemon and/or cat?

I have about 800 myself, but I know some guys have several thousand.

420 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6641 00:35

How many hug pillows can a hardcore otaku have?

Every Sailor Moon episode digitally remastered and re-relased on Blu-Ray.

421 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6642 22:43

What would your weapon of choice for eternal world domination be?

The power of one hundred standard-issue houseflies.

422 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6643 17:56

What kind of power does the Lord of the Flies have anyway?

Only twice.

423 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 02:34

How many days per year did you pretend to be sick in order to skip school?

It would be in the bonus features of every Blu-Ray that contained digitally remastered episodes of Sailor Moon.

424 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 06:27

What would happen if Sailor Neptune and Sailor Uranus came to life and their sex tape leaked on the internet?

Honor thy error as hidden intention.

425 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 09:56

What do I do if I feel a bulge when I'm groping a chick I picked up at a bar?

The first time was in May of 1993. His body was cold but his breath was hot. "Oh, >>425" he whispered as his hand teased and explored me like none had before. "I'm ready," I said, as my heartbeat quickened. He grabbed my ass and slid it down. "I'm going in." A jolt of electricity shot through me as his general forced open those tightly sealed doors and entered the hidden room. He found what he want; he came, and he left. But what remained?

426 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 17:07

When did you first experience the pleasure of being cummed inside?

It's quite busy, a notebook, a checkered wristband, some biscuits, a metal tankard, a pair of scissors, a comb, a few lighters, a pile of magazine clippings, some bloody razorblades and a couple of external hard drives made by LaCie

427 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 17:13

What must I carry in order to steal data from the company headquarters, get away with it, and sell the data for 1 million dollars?

Gatchaman had Gatchamaniacs, Sailor Moon had Moonies, Naruto had Narutards, what name is given to Strike Witches fanboys and fangirls?

428 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6644 18:43

What the hell is this crazy >>427 talking about?

No, no, the hair on my balls.

429 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6646 03:31

So, you want me to cut off your balls, right?

It smells delicious but its penis is much too big.

430 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6646 14:27

How would you describe Card Captor Sakura's vagina?

The one time Randy Marsh was famous.

431 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6647 10:04

When was the thousandth time that a penis entered your anus, >>430?

Yume Miru Kusuri, for a grand total of twenty times. Yeah, I went through a LOT of tissue.

432 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6647 16:40

What is the most intellectually stimulating piece of literature you have ever read?

I think it's time we left.

433 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6648 02:22

He went down to the basement after he knocked you out with that weird drug, saying something about how he's finding "bigger toys"... older brother, what do you think we should do? He left the door unlocked!

The real question is, why not yourself?

434 Name: John Macramé : 1993-09-6648 09:00

Why doesn't anybody love me?

Get your neck massaged.

435 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6649 09:35

What should I do when my girlfriend dumped me? She used to make tender love, if you know what you mean.

You should consider not watching any TV for a week then, this could end dangerous.

436 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6650 07:44

I've bought this TV set on ebay. I tried to watch news on it but as a result I suffered a grand mal seizure and then killed a person with an axe. What should I do about it?

Let it go, maaaan.

437 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6650 09:37

>>436 why have people been dropping the original convention of the first thread in addressing the person who is to answer your question and the person whose question you are answering?

>>438 well, not sure why you ask, but yes, I ate it.

438 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6650 13:49

>>437 did u by appel

>>439 mayb lol

439 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6650 14:30

>>438 Did u tak her 2 teh barl?

>>440 The kind of teens that start smoking cigarettes because Solid Snake smokes cigarettes.

440 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6660 22:25

What kind of teens aren't just an edgy little bundle of angst?

"Is this a dagger which I see before me?"

441 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6797 22:03

>>440
What is the best pickup line I can use to hit on an English Lit. major?

>>442
Urethral sounding.

442 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6797 22:12

>>441
What do you use this funny-smelling plastic string for?

>>443
NO. No no no! You were supposed to plug in the CHARTREUSE cable first.

443 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6797 22:46

>>442
Okay, the Whiskey Wire is connected, what now?

>>444
Fentanyl.

444 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6798 15:40

>>443 What should I use to assassinate that annoying bitch without being seen and without making the police suspect that I am guilty?

>>445 Shooting 2 Desert Eagle guns at the same time.

445 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6799 14:57

>>444
How will I eventually commit suicide?

>>446
About four million cubic feet of mincemeat.

446 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6799 17:40

After all that anticipation, all I got was a boypive. Should have known that girlpives would sell out less than three hours after release.

447 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6799 18:06

>>446
What's it like in the universe where posting in the wrong thread is okay?

>>448
I'm not sure there is an answer to that.

448 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6799 20:03

>>447
What is the coordinates of the intersect between the lines y = sinx and y = 1/cosx?

>>449
As you might expect, I can't remember it very clearly, but I think it was about 80%.

449 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 00:53

>>448 What was your score on that standardized test you took in middle school?

>>450 What happens if an elementary school student plays Touhou on hard mode?

450 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 09:19

>>449
What deep philosophical questions have you been pondering recently?

>>451
Cherries.

451 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 14:58

>>450
Which fruit has the most innuendo value?

>>452
It is easy when you are a trans-dimensional shape shifter.

452 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 15:38

>>451 How do you sneak into the locker room of the opposite sex, and then take photos?

>>453 Letting the outcasts shoot bullies to death freely.

453 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 17:05

>>452
What would be your first action upon being appointed as a headteacher?

>>454
It would be "Reverie".

454 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6800 17:47

>>453
What Debussy piece would you want playing in the background as the bombs fall?

>>455
Smooch and pooch.

455 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 14:07

>>454
What should I name my posh brothel for furries?

>>456
Nah, what you want to do, is go OLDSKOOL with it.

456 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 14:15

>>455 Do you like my electronica music? If you don't, what do you suggest that I do?

>>457 another one of those animal combat games that ends with "mon."

457 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 15:59

>>456 What is 'Dogfighting with Matt Damon' all about?

>>458 I don't know much about electricity, but you should probably just go home.

458 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 16:21

>>457
Oh God how did this get here I am not good with computer?

>>459
If you ask the question, you already know the answer.

459 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 17:26

>>458
Would that response suggest that you originally came to DQN from you-know-where?

>>460
Corrugated cardboard.

460 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6801 19:21

>>459
Sir, I challenge you to a duel! Would you care to specify the weapons?

>>461
Only on moonless nights and behind the pawnshop.

461 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6802 06:23

>>460
Would you fuck a goat?

>>462
X Y Z Z Y

462 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6802 10:25

>>461
What's the cheatcode to feel instead of think in the lates tanasinn video game?

>>463
Four more years.

463 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6802 11:25

>>462
How long until the end of the world, would you say?

>>464
Ins.

464 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6812 08:07

>>463
What could be considered the opposite of "outs"?

>>465
I have reason to believe they may in fact be homosexual.

465 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6812 13:15

>>464
What are the sources of gay magic?

>>466
0.0000001%.

466 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6813 23:29

>>465 What are the odds of making $1,000,000 USD or more from making comics?

>>467 The hardest truth ever told.

467 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6814 04:08

>>466
You have a tiny penis. How well do you agree with that statement?

>>468
Maybe

468 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6815 12:50

>>467
Are you projecting your insecurity over the size of your penis onto >>466?

>>469
Something to do with little girls and flowers. Lots of flowers.

469 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6815 15:19

>>468
What's your vision of paradise?

>>470
6Hz vibrato, rapid-decay reverb, 3200Hz lowpass, 1200Hz notch.

470 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6815 15:25

>>469
What custom features did you desire in your custom vibrating dildo?

>>471
Brian Peppers.

471 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6815 15:49

>>470 What was his name before he became Sargent Peppers?

>>472 1997 VW GTI VR6

472 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6815 20:08

>>471
Um, I'd like to ask you a favour... Y'see, I have this fetish for men listing technical terms I can't understand. If it's not too much trouble, could you please say a few numbers and acronyms which don't mean anything to me?

>>473
Don't look at me; it was like that when I got here.

473 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6816 02:26

>>472
Why is there a dead little girl on your floor with all her clothes ripped off and stained with blood?

>>474
The bastard child of Karl Marx and a London street whore

474 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6816 11:51

>>473 China calls itself a communist country, but that isn't completely true. How would you explain China's economy?

>>475 An several hardcore nerds discussing what would happen if DC Comics and Marvel Comics characters decided to fight each other to the death.

475 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6818 20:00

>>474
A disturbing nightmare, you say? What was it about?

>>476
I love you.

476 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6818 22:26

>>475
I'll only let you fuck me if you love me. D-do you?

>>477
Tricks and hoes

477 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6818 23:00

>>476, what did that stage magician say he needed for a weekend of gardening and entertaining children?

>>478, look within and you'll understand.

478 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6818 23:12

>>477
Why does my ass hurt?

>>479
Methane.

479 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6818 23:17

>>478
Why did my ass caught on fire?

>>480
It will have to wait unless the sky clears.

480 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 07:26

>>479
Didn't you say we were going on a road trip in your solar-powered car this afternoon?

>>481
That was a long time ago.

481 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 07:50

>>480

You broke my heart and now you want favors from me!?!

>>482

It's free Slurpee Day at 7/11.

482 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 08:05

>>481
Why can't you attend your father's funeral?

>>483
I believe her exact words were "Jesus dick".

483 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 15:01

>>482 What did Sweet Bro say after his (or her, now) accidental sex change?

>>484 It was about three months ago today, and it still hurts to walk.

484 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 19:38

>>483 I heard you took and arrow to the knee. Is that true?

>>485 That is the kind of dream I had 3 times in one week.

485 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6821 20:41

>>484
What is your opinion on George and Lennie's dream in Of Mice & Men?

>>486
I did it in a sort of frenzied state last Saturday at 1AM.

486 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6822 03:03

>>485

Why is there a steaming pile of shit in my sink?

>>487

I don't want to get my feet dirty.

487 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6826 08:04

>>486
What is your stance on naked mud wrestling?

>>488
Not until you've done the dishes.

488 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6829 20:14

>>487
Please can I go whore myself out for drug money?

>>489
Strudel.

489 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6829 23:00

>>488
So you're leaving me for Gretchen, eh? What does that Teutonic floozy have to offer that I don't?

>>490
I guess he's one of them, too.

490 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6832 19:49

>>489
Why does my father keeps insisting that the date is actually May 2012?

>>491
A warm, fluffy blanket.

491 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6844 02:24

>>490
I have all these dead bunnies. What can I make?

>>492
Katsu curry.

492 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6844 06:40

>>491
I have all these dead catgirls. What can I make?

>>493
Um, they're right there on your head.

493 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6844 08:39

>>492
Weehre are my eeyess

>>494
I think so

494 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6844 22:07

>>493
Do you agree with the philosophy "Don't think, feel"?

>>495
A soggy sandwich made of despair.

495 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6844 22:29

>>494
What do you get when you ask a goth (who is bad at cooking) to make lunch for you?

>>496
OOGA CHAKA OOGA OOGA OOGA CHAKA

496 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6845 02:48

>>495 What are the only lyrics that people can remember from that old song?

>>497 Jethro Tull's greatest sucess

497 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6886 12:27

>>496
What're you thinking about?

>>498
I love them all.

498 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6886 15:27

>>497
Which Stronzemon is your favorite?

>>499
It's under the bed, where you always leave it.

499 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6886 16:01

>>498
Have you seen my sanity?

>>500
How does it feel to seize the >>500GET?

500 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6886 19:11

>>499
What have you always wondered since you first came to this website?

>>501
There's probably a Tesco Value version

501 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6886 20:03

>>500
I only have 70p in my pocket. Think I can get an iPhone for that?

>>502
If you can't typeset it in TEX, it doesn't need to be printed.

502 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6887 07:54

>>501
I'm trying to print out an image of a man wearing a bowler hat, but it won't work. What do you recommend?

>>503
Your sister.

503 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6890 09:37

>>502
This stew is delicious! What's in it?

>>504
More than 98%, unfortunately.

504 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6890 10:44

>>503 ( ゚ ヮ゚) How much of the world's mittens are owned by 1% of the population?

>>505
It never existed in the first place, except for wigs.

505 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6891 08:12

>>504
What happened to the elitist superstructure's secret union of wigs and wig-wearers?

>>506
On the contrary! I'd wait at least a month.

506 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6891 10:21

>>505
I demand that you come to my house and fuck me right now! You're on your way over right now, aren't you?

>>507
I don't care how many times I have to say it! I don't want your money! I won't even take it for that!

507 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6891 13:43

>>506 I just want to buy 1 ounce of your pee! What would you lose if you sold it?

>>508 World's fastest giant turtle.

508 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6893 15:15

>>507
What do you want to be when you grow up?

>>509
I don't know, I'm only a stamp collector.

509 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6900 04:13

>>508 Since you're into collecting things, can you tell me how many coins Zimbabwe uses in its currency?

>>510 A jigsaw puzzle of Uncle Sam standing amongst some stereotypically depicted native americans.

510 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6901 21:56

>>509
What should I get my hippie aunt for her fiftieth wedding anniversary?

>>511
As long as it's only stunned for an hour or two, I say go for it.

511 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6902 00:53

>>510 Should I fuck this animal that I used my Phaser on?

>>512 That really annoying Ace Of Base song.

512 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6902 10:09

>>511
What song do you want played at your funeral?

>>513
Please... it hurts so much!

513 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6921 07:52

>>512 Would you like me to lance your infected testicle? I'll be wanting two million yen in compensation for the emotional trauma, though.

>>514
He never was one for explaining the joke. sniff I'll miss him.

514 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6939 16:42

>>513
I still don't get it. Why did he ask for his body to be "dipped in marmalade and fed to walruses"?

>>515
The first time isn't too bad, but it's all downhill from there.

515 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6940 02:03

>>514 What is using this harsh drug like?

>>516 being addicted to Touhou games

516 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6940 12:28

>>515 So, what's New York's biggest economic problem in 2014?

>>517 What did they mean by, "the pressure, the terrible pressure"?

517 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6941 23:11

>>516 They are talking about needing to fart, but if they let it out they will be humiliated.

>>518 Filmnstuff reviews Top Gun for the NES.

518 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6948 17:37

>>517
What was the last thing to make you cry?

>>519
Stick it up your nose and hope for the best.

519 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6950 14:47

>>518
So how is this firework paper going to clear up my sinus trouble?

>>520
All the raw meat you could eat in a lifetime.

520 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6950 17:25

>>519
Blowing up a farm? What's in it for me?

>>521
About ten thousand of them.

521 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6951 05:04

>>520
How many children have you, erm, examined in this fiscal year alone?

>>522
Arthur Schopenhauer's "World as Will and Idea", if you can find both volumes!

522 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6951 07:53

>>521
Remind me, which books are we taking to tonight's book burning?

>>523
I stopped doing that about seven years ago.

523 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6959 10:20

>>522
Do you still perform demonic rituals to ensure prosperity?

>>524
Boop.

524 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6959 12:25

>>523
Out of all the beautiful sounds different cultures have created over centuries of music, what is the greatest sound of all?

>>525
A mediocre J-drama.

525 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6961 10:15

>>524
What is the most accurate description of your life at the moment?

>>526
Ask again later and I might be a little more willing.

526 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6968 21:55

>>525
Would you like to travel forwards in time with me?

>>527
It, uh, it looks like a huge cock and balls.

527 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6971 18:31

>>528 how would you describe what petroleum refining machinery looks like?

>>530 a tornado in reverse.

528 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-6993 11:40

>>527 How would you describe John Freeman?

>>529 Zombies ate my head.

529 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7002 20:50

>>528 So, how did your joyful bike ride went?

>>530 It was... inevitable...

530 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7003 15:08

>>529
What was the answer to 6 across in last week's crossword?

>>531
Sausage wrapped in pancake on a stick.

531 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7003 15:24

>>530
So what was your first time like?

>>532
Finally had to shock the puppy. :(

532 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7006 12:59

>>531
Why does your cat look so damn smug?

>>533
No, only one! Only one, you lunatic!

533 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7224 19:09

>>532
I applied the serum to test subjects 001-006. Kay?

>>534
Because it was a good thread.

534 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7326 15:11

>>533
Why don't people post here more often?

>>535
Absolutely, DEFINITELY, not mittens.

535 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7326 15:12

>>534
What do you wear when performing necromancy?

>>536
I think it should be just a little bigger.

536 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7326 19:12

>>535
Sir, this is our prototype N64 controller.

>>357
Oh god, anything but that!

537 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7326 20:27

>>536 A Wiimote that is an N64 controller with motion sensors added.

>>538 A suggestive joystick

538 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7327 04:15

>>537 What was the first thing you ever pleasured yourself anally with?

>>539 I tried to but it didn't work the way it did in my imagination.

539 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7327 06:06

>>538
So, did you ever build that flying battle-mech you were talking about?

>>540
The flavor really isn't that nice.

540 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7327 13:31

>>539 Did you hear they brought Creamola Foam back?

>>541 It's all Dragon Arrow! Dragon Arrow! Dragon Tail! Dragon Arrow!

541 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7405 20:58

I found this old inscription, "☊☊☋☊" can you translate it?

I am pretty sure that that is beyond the purview of most physical therapy, sorry.

542 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7405 22:09

>>541
Hey doc, is there anyway I could get jacked off by futanari catgirls in maid costumes over school swimsuits as they are fucked from behind by giant octopus?

>>543
Try shaking it.

543 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7406 04:05

>>542
I cannot get the last couple of drops of piss out of my wiener properly when I'm at the urinal, can you help me with this?

>>544
When the label says "Do Not Eat", it's probably not a good idea to eat it.

544 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7406 09:42

>>543
How do I open this awful package of salt?

>>545
You didn't need to tell your preschool teacher that.

545 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7406 17:15

>>544 I caught you doing shotacon! What are you going to do, now that I have secret that I can use against you?

>>546 The country music star that didn't die of alcoholism or smoking.

546 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7412 02:00

>>545
Whose soul does Johnny Cash's shade feast on?

>>547
Oh, don't get me wrong, it is wonderful. It is just so embarrassing.

547 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7419 15:59

>>546
Why do you hate german schiesse porn?

>>548
It never happened; Don't mention this incident again.

548 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7419 18:55

>>547 Were you playing with your Spaceballs dolls again?

>>549 using an official U.S.Navy uniform to cosplay as a schoolgirl.

549 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7480 19:27

>>548
What do you have planned now that Don't Ask Don't Tell is gone?

>>550
Because many people confuse penguins with puffins.

550 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7489 23:44

>>549
Why does everyone try to give my penguin a cigarette?

>>551
Never speak that name again.

551 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7491 07:29

>>550
Have you heard from Squeeks lately?

>>552
Line 5217.

552 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7491 08:44

>>551
So, when in that shorty story he finally shags her under the moon?

>>553
It already happened in 1991.

553 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7505 04:10

>>552
When will September end?

>>554
Yes, exactly like Green Day.

554 Name: !ESpeoN/nPA : 1993-09-7505 15:56

>>553
Don't you sometimes wish for somebody to wake you up when this nightmarish on-line "September" is over?

>>555
The motor would probably blow up.

555 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7505 22:32

>>554 What would happen if I used nitrous oxide in my lawnmower?

>>556 The greatest automatic pistol that wasn't made by Colt or Glock.

556 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7509 22:15

>>555
I need an analogy for your penis, immediately.

>>557
The square root of minus one.

557 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7510 03:00

>>556
Imagine a number for me.

>>558
You can't hide such a strange vice forever, you know. Sooner or later people will learn about it.

558 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7640 18:18

>>557 You didn't tell anyone about the Brazilian porn collection, right?

>>559 10 month old croutons.

559 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7662 17:00

>>558 What is the last thing i'm going to eat today?

>>560 You got sriracha on it.

560 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7662 17:31

>>559 my cat is freaking the fuck out, what's the matter?

>>561 Witchaven.

561 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7663 00:14

>>560 What wikipedia page has the best excuse for use of the phrase ``titular fortress''?

>>562 Fold into three sections of equal area.

562 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7663 09:51

>>561 How the hell do I read this pamphlet I just printed?

>>563 Of course not, his head is in the way.

563 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7663 12:36

>>562 can I have anal sex with this politician?

>>564 No. NO. Red one first!

564 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7852 22:24

>>563 Hey I think I am going to play the pokemon games in order. Is Silver okay?

>>565 Cattleya from Queen's Blade.

565 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7852 22:58

>>564
Well, if you don't dig Bayonetta, who ARE you into?

>>566
I think the best adjective would be "gnarled".

566 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7853 10:17

>>565
So what do you think the affect on your grandmother's soul was when she walked in on you and your boyfriend in your sex chamber?

>>567
Yes, I'm sure it was the second to last article!

567 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7863 14:31

>>566 New York Times said they would publish an article about me, why can't I find it?

>>568 Drifting a rental car.

568 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7865 05:18

>>567
What's the fastest way to get to work?

>>568
There's a particular charm to her.

569 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7865 12:10

>>568
Dude, WHY are you trying to go to Mogeko Castle and meet Moge-ko, again?

>>570
Please at least pronounce it correctly.

570 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7866 23:23

>>569 Why doesn't anybody help me when I ask for shiitake mushrooms?

>>571 Bacon from genetically modified pigs.

571 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 05:19

>>570
What's the breakfast of the future?

>>572
Sitting for prolonged periods of time is unhealthy.

572 This post sucked.

573 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 16:13

>>571
Why can't I feel my legs?

>>574
I wouldn't recommend it without ear protection.

574 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 16:35

>>573 Ever use a jackhammer as a Pogo stick?

>>575 Wearing a gas mask while kicking a skunk in the balls.

575 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 17:19

>>574
What was your best "feels good man" experience?

>>576
Put the shit on top of the shit so you can grab the shit.

576 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 20:44

>>575
My toilet won't flush any more and I think it's blocked, any advice?

>>577
The one with the pretty girls on it.

577 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 22:14

>>576
What's your favourite Holocaust memorial?

>>578
Chicken Chinese Style.

578 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8038 23:12

>>577
What's it called when two rickshaws drive toward each other?

>579

Make sure it can't tie a bowline knot.

579 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8047 02:02

>>578
I want to buy a pet dog, but I don't want one that can tie bowline knots. What should I do?

>>580
Always cut the blue wire first.

580 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8047 05:18

>>579
How do I deliver a baby?

>>581
Five hundred kg of musk.

581 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8047 12:08

>>850
What do I need to get into space?

>>852
You have to flip it turnways.

582 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8047 13:25

>>581
There's only one piece left in this jigsaw puzzle, but I can't get it to fit. What should I do?

>>583
The very, very, very top.

583 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 11:37

>>582
What part of a chocolate cornet do you eat first?

>>584
Two bushels per fortnight.

584 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 12:52

>>583
How much is college tuition?

>>585
A magnitude 8 earthquake.

585 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 15:03

>>584
What's funnier than a magnitude 7 earthquake?

>>586
Your fixation on Amy Pohler.

586 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 17:37

>>585
What keeps ruining these new imageboards?

>>587
Not if you keep jamming your penis in it.

587 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 19:21

>>586
Will the woman I love ever leave me?

>>588
Slice of life anime.

588 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8048 23:40

>>587
Why even live?

>>589
Start downloading every video you come across

589 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8049 00:31

>>588
What's a good plan for the impending shutdown of the Internet?

>>590
Skeletor.

590 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8049 10:34

>>589
Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?

>>591
Like a flock of little birds.

591 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8050 21:45

>>590
What's the best way to travel?

>>592
The five second rule.

592 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8051 22:34

>>591
How is it that you're able to eat shards of glass?

>>593
An ironclad esophagus.

593 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8053 18:26

>>592
How is it that you're able to eat shards of lava?

>>594
Pigs in mittens.

594 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8054 20:08

>>593
What's the proper term for the despicable scum who try and infiltrate the superstructure?

>>595
Someplace where the windows don't have bars, I guess. Also, no bugs.

595 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8054 20:43

>>594 What is your ideal version of Microsoft Windows

>>596 Golf balls with rockets inside of them.

596 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8055 10:26

>>595
How did the stars get up there?

>>597
Giant babies with their faces kicked in.

597 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8065 23:01

>>596
At what point did you realize that David Lynch had gone overboard?

>>598
The biggest one I've ever seen.

598 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8073 19:13

>>597
What's your favorite biscuit?

>599

The Elitist Superstructure of DQN

599 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8073 22:20

>598

Whose responsible for poor decision making?

>>600
I can't speak for anyone else, but I have reasons to keep it there.

600 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 08:02

>>599
Why do so many people keep things like their skeletons and sexuality "in the closet"?

>>601
The most powerful diuretic available.

601 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 08:58

>>600
I've been thinking about how bland the front of my house is. How could I efficiently pebbledash it?

>>602
Honestly, with a flavour like that, you won't need anything else.

602 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 10:59

>>601
Besides garlic, what can I put in a stew to keep vampires and other suspicious house guests from lingering after dark?

>>603
Obviously. Where else were you going to seek satisfaction?

603 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 20:40

>>602
Was it right for me to shoot that backstabber while he was on the toilet?

>>604
Yes, exactly like James Joyce.

604 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 21:46

>>603
Should I wear an eyepatch under my glasses to make me look cool?

>>605
If wishes were dishes

605 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8075 23:00

>>604
How could I possibly serve all these fishes?

>>606
Because it's midnight.

606 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8076 10:35

>>605
Hold on, how did it suddenly become tomorrow?

>>607
They are the herbs and spices of indolence.

607 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8077 01:06

>>606
What's in this blunt, anyway?

>>608
The sermons of Rev. Billy Herrington

608 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8077 05:07

>>607
What should I listen to while heading down to the leather club 2 doors down?

>>609
Año means year. Ano means anus.

609 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8083 22:20

>>608 What is ANARU?

>>610 Poking a skunk with a stick.

610 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8083 22:34

>>609 What's more fun than a bee on a string?

>>611 She's a professional contortionist.

611 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8084 03:59

>>610 Was I putting my wiener in her or was she was putting her wiener in me?

>>613 You think you have it tough. Imagine what your "attacker" is feeling right now.

612 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8084 16:22

I've been skipped! I think I've slipped into a crack in time!

613 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8084 20:02

>>611 This bear mauling wound stings something fierce. Should I go to the hospital?

>>614 I don't know. You'd think he would show up by now.

614 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8084 20:20

>>613 Where did >>612 go?

>>615 Just lift the sink up and feel around.

615 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8085 02:06

>>614 I, uhh, dropped >>612 while I was washing it, and I forgot to put one of those mesh things in the drain. I'm sorry, what should I do?

>>616 Only those hipsters who care about whether ‘Nero’ was spelt ‘Neron’.

616 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8088 19:41

>>615 Who are these violin-playing hipsters that get into fights with each other?

>>617 The fake Shimajiro subtitles meme.

617 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8171 07:27

>>616
How do you make a DQN laugh?
>>618
One of the better Killers albums

618 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8171 16:57

>>617
What was a fever you can't sweat out? Ebola?

>>619
Yes, but I haven't cleaned up yet, and it's been more than twelve hours.

619 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8180 19:20

>>618 Will you ever return home from the pig farm?

>>620 The most powerful spell ever cast in an animu.

620 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8180 20:07

>>619
I just took a bowl-shattering dump. What could I compare it to in order to impress my internet friends?

>>621
Just don't breastfeed it after midnight. Lock up your guns too, just in case.

621 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8245 04:10

>>620
I'm not too thrilled about the new Gremlins reboot. What do you think the catchphrase will be?

>>622
Just keep adding backslashes until it works.

622 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8245 04:46

>>621
I can't seem to access 4chan b/. Wat do?

>>623
Well, yeah. I wouldn't put it in exactly those words, though.

623 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8245 23:01

>>622 I oppose the war on drugs because I want drug users to freely overdose themselves to death.

>>624 the actual effect of South Korea's ban on internet porn.

624 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8246 17:16

>>623 Breeders?

>>625 We need to do some gardening.

625 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8246 20:59

>>624
Have you seen the baby anywhere?

>>626
Very indirectly, but yes.

626 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8246 21:17

>>625
Is there any evidence that mittens cause autism?

>>627
No, no! I said head lice.

627 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8247 16:32

>>626 Why should I stick my head in a vise?

>>628 Making a rant that is 600 words long about a statement that is 12 words long.

628 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8248 00:27

>>627 What do I regret the most about 2015?

>>629 I haven't been at the desert at all in years.

629 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8248 05:23

>>628
How was your trip to the Arctic?
>>630
The cucumbers are next the beans in the cupboard

630 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8251 21:38

>>629 I can't find anything exciting to stuff up my ass. Do you know where I can find something exciting?

>>631 A Super Pochaco cosplayer.

631 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8252 17:31

>>630 Who will take my virginity and save me from wizardry?

>>632 Don't look at me like that. It wasn't me

632 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8253 00:29

>>631 What ate the last slice of the pie?

>>633 The best Super Famicom game of 1994.

633 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8253 02:01

>>632 Nankoku Shōnen Papuwa-kun is coming out next year. Do you think it'll be any good?

>>634 I saw one crossing the road the other day. I swerved and barely missed it.

634 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8253 02:24

>>633
What's with the homeless problem in this town?
>>635
June is a strange time of year

635 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8254 09:21

>>634
Why are you wearing that ridiculous hat?

>>636
Okinawa, of course.

636 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8256 14:12

>>635 Where should I hunt a whale?

>>637 Playing golf with dragon balls.

637 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8257 13:57

>>636
Why were they scattered around the world in the first place, anyway?
>>638
That's "99 problems", not "99 bottles" you dolt.

638 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8257 16:49

>>637
OH I'm sorry, what would YOU consider an appropriate side dish for spaghetti?

>>639
I left her behind by accident, but I hope she calls soon.

639 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8257 18:55

>>638
Hasn't your grandma been at the strip club a little too long?

>>640
They're usually a bit simpler than that, and good for only a few uses.

640 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8275 08:12

>>639
What do you think about feminists claiming that women are "able to do anything a man can do"?

>>641
Most buildings should be solid enough to withstand that, although I wouldn't recommend it.

641 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8275 15:08

>>640
The big boxing match is coming up and I want to train by punching the wall of my house. Is there any risk of structural damage?

>>642
The meteoric rise of e-cigs.

642 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8276 15:20

>>641 Do you know what would happen if tobacco products were taxed even more heavily than they already are?

>>643 Zapping things with a huge laser, recording it, then showing the footage on YouTube.

643 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8291 21:38

>>642
What's the most irresponsible thing you've done with space program funds?

>>644
Down the street from the Unholy Citadel.

644 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8291 22:02

>>643 I think I've got the wrong door, can you tell me where the leather club is?

>>645 I'm no doctor but it's definitely NOT supposed to bend that way.

645 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8394 16:29

>>644
Hey, you have a PhD in materials science, don't you? Look, this stick of chalk is tied in a knot!

>>646
Love.

646 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8395 04:16

>>645
Why did you burn down that house, anyway?

>>647
Zucchini bread and spiders.

647 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8395 11:00

>>646
I have come up with the perfect recipe for blue waffle, stalagmite and bovril soup but can't think of a good accompaniment. Any suggestions?

>>648
Of course! I loved "Shit My Dentist Used To Say Before I Removed Her Lower Jaw".

648 Name: Aretha Longwell : 1993-09-9352 06:24

Hi guys

I remember speaking to someone from your company about the global vape shop database I am using for my ejuice brand.

I think this is the link to the official sales page: https://bit.ly/2V3ZKAU

I could of course send you my copy of the database but I think it is best if you get your own copy to get all the latest updates.

I hope that helps.

649 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9352 17:45

>>648 You came back too far, you haven't had that conversation with anyone from my company yet!

>>650 It's possible to make it too tight, so just be careful.

650 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9353 14:57

>>649
Any medical risk associated with being tight-fisted?

>>651
So he obtained that girl's phone number without waking her up.

651 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9353 18:03

>>650
Why did that guy hire a mind-reader at the middle of the night?

>>652
The personality of a fire based magic user.

652 Name: :) : 1993-09-9400 15:07

>>651
What kind of personality does a fire based magic user have?

>>653
62.34 inches in length and 43.87 in width, obviously

653 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9401 03:03

>>652
What are the ideal dimensions of a fantasy penis?

>>654
Twelve. Ask for more than that and I'll kill you

654 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9401 12:53

>>653
How many times may I have sex with your grandfather?

>>655
No, your sweat pores weren't made for that.

655 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9402 22:17

>>654
Can I sweat red Gatorade like the people do in television commercials?

>>656
Mocking people who say "You are what you eat."

656 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9446 07:29

>>655
Why are you, a 24 year old man, on a timeout during thanksgiving?
>>657
Yes, but don't let anyone from Texas hear you say that

657 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9448 18:30

>>656
When I say "I hate garlic toast" then why do you get so worried?
>>658
The smell of Centorea

658 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9448 22:44

>>657
Who? Is this another one of your "Friends"?
>>669
My mouth is a desert

659 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9512 05:19

>>658
Your body is a wonderland, but why has it taken me three boring hours so far, and I still haven't seen so much as an inch of it yet?

>>660
A drinking game based on Musashi Gundoh.

660 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9519 14:35

>>659 I want to see LARPers have a sword fight. How would I convince them to do that outside the renaissance fair?

>>661 Megaman X9 for the Playstation 5 and Microsoft Scorpio.

661 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9557 13:28

>>660 As a time traveller from the year 2993, what is the next Mighty No.9 and Ouya, respectively?

>>662 There are walls to your left and below you. You can sense pizza, but not ghosts or houses.

662 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9557 14:17

>>661 what would happen if I typed "> Look around" in this bishoujo horror adventure game?
>>663 probably Grandpa

663 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9557 16:41

>>662 Edward Snowden's favourite 2ch AA character?

>>664 Yes, but Marie Curie would be rolling in her grave.

664 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9566 19:11

>>663 Is it fun to play Polandball with Polonium?

>>665 The social cost of obese cigarette smokers.

665 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9590 21:30

>>664 What is with the sudden appearance of all of these Federally-Funded Phlegm-Filled Fatty Farms?

>>666 Because she insists on spelling it 'whisky', without the E.

666 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9591 01:08

>>665 Why is my GF's spelling so shit?

>>667 Have fun blowing yourself up.

667 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9591 02:09

>>666 I'm about to light up this cigarette at a gas station, for the glory of Satan of course. Any tips?

>>668 Big Structural I-beams.

668 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9592 02:43

>>667 How I make my house look fancier?

>>669 Drop a Hydrogen Bomb on it.

669 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9592 12:12

>>668 How can I eradicate pasta sauce stains from my shirt quickly and easily?

>>670 I suggest therapy

670 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 01:01

>>669 How do I get out of this insane asylum?

>>671 Poke it with a cattle prod.

671 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 01:19

>>670 How do you get pikachu on a bus?

>>672 Change the name to "poop club"

672 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 02:46

>>671 How do I get more people to join my cult?

>>673 [THIS ANSWER WAS REMOVED BY THE GOVERNMENT]

673 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 02:57

>>672 What line should I use as the clincher to the alt-right conspiracy theory I'm making?
>>674 Perhaps letting it sit in vinegar.

674 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 06:00

>>673 How do I make my sick Cat better?

>>675 Suplex it; pro-wrestling style!

675 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 08:54

>>674 What's the best way to dip biscuits into a hot drink, to get maximum flavour saturation without completely sacrificing biscuit rigidity?

>>676 Fumble around the edge until you find some leverage, and start from there. That goes for you too >>840

676 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 10:25

>>675
I'm trying to move house but I only have this crowbar. How?

>>677
Plant it 2 months in advance.

677 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 15:57

>>676 what's the best way to insure that I get that gymnastics world record before anyone else?

>>678 It needs more cats

678 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 16:08

>>677 How would you describe the Yulin province meat festival?

>>679 A map of all the provinces in China.

679 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9593 16:37

>>678 What would you draw if you wanted to experience Laogai?

>>680 Five on the top shelf, nine underneath.

680 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9594 22:31

>>679 Where are the stolen goods?

>>681 Extinguish the sun.

681 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9595 19:03

>>680 What will pissing into an upside-down telescope do?

>>682 I left it there and forgot about it, okay?!

682 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9595 23:23

>>681 Why is there a piece of shit on my chair?

>>683 I just sent it to you ;)

683 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9598 05:22

>>682 Where can I find the meaning of life?

>>684 Drink liquid Nitrogen.

684 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9598 05:50

>>683 How can I freeze my stomach?

>>685 Simple, you must start a revolution!

685 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9598 06:30

>>684 Nobody ever taught me how to dance dance. What do I do first?

>>686 Learn magic

686 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9598 09:30

>>685 How do I cast "web"?

>>687 Twice a week, except leap days.

687 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9599 03:05

>>686 How often should I shampoo my hair?

>>688 Close your eyes and magic will happen.

688 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9599 07:32

>>687 Why are you in my room at dead midnight?

>>689 I agree that three rights make a left but you lost me on the other one.

689 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9600 14:45

>>688 If you think about it, Trump, Boris and Arlene are actually pretty egalitarian. Anyway, can't wait to see Corbyn win this one.

>>690 No.

690 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9601 05:19

>>689 Am I real?

>>691 Shoot it until it dies.

691 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9601 05:41

>>690 How do I satisfy the cybersex demon?

>>692 Yes!

692 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9601 19:53

>>691 Who's the best prog rock band?

>>693 Not if you want to keep that finger.

693 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9602 05:46

>>692 Can I stick my finger in a pencil sharpener to sharpen my fingernail?

>>694 Only on Tuesdays.

694 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9602 16:00

>>693 I tried the succubus summoning ritual for 6 days. Does it ever work?

>>695 The girls from Dead Or Alive playing by Keijo rules.

695 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9603 23:52

>>694 What gives you a boner?

>>696 Those make HORRIBLE pets.

696 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9606 02:17

>>695 Why is Harley Quinn the only person who is portrayed with hyenas?

>>697 The uncensored version of Beetle Bailey.

697 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9606 05:21

>>696 What's something that can help me fall asleep?

>>698 Find a black bear and hug it.

698 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9606 13:57

>>697 How can I experience a softness worth dying for?
>>699 The name of your first pet spelled backwards.

699 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9608 18:20

>>698 What would make a badass name for my new D&D character?

>>700 Go to Antarctica and live with the Penguins.

700 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9608 19:13

>>699 What would be the cutest death I could ask for?
>>701 Put it underwater for 2 hours then wash it with body lotion.

701 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9608 22:48

>>700 My butt has a small man growing out if it, what should I do?

>>702 Donkey Kong 64.

702 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9611 19:04

>>701 What's a good substitute for a butt plug?

>>703 I'd tell you, but then I'd be forced to kill you, and I don't wanna have to deal with body disposal.

703 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9612 00:32

>>702 What’s up, dude?

>>704 It is because you are afraid.

704 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9612 15:46

>>703 Why did I print 72 copies of the script to the Angry Birds movie?

>>705 Shove it up your ass.

705 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9612 18:02

>>704 I have removed the small man out of my arse, what should I do with it?

>>706 No matter what happens, do not touch it!

706 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9612 18:46

>>705 Sparks are flying out of my light switch. Since I can't afford an electrician, what can I do?

>>707 The dangers of 6G wireless telephone networks.

707 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9615 00:35

>>706 What's something that can take my mind off of my brain cancer?

>>708 It needs to be plugged into the wall first.

708 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9615 01:07

>>707 Why won't my fleshlight work?

>>709 Only if you give me that hat and all the money you've got on you.

709 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9616 18:20

>>708 Can I steal your soul for my collection?

>>710 Put it in the freezer.

710 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9618 18:05

>>709 How do I hide this corpse from the police bloodhounds?

>>711 A good way to make the crime scene look like an accident.

711 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9618 20:46

>>710 What'll happen if I bury this corpse in several feet of snow?

>>712 You're gonna need a bigger boat.

712 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9618 20:54

>>711 I can't travel with my voleyball, what do I do?

>>713 You better change it.

713 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9620 06:34

>>712 How do I prevent myself from watching Godzilla all day?

>>714 Domesticate a pet Bear.

714 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9620 09:04

>>713 I wanna name something Kuma. What should I do?

>>715 I don't know, probably around 15 feet.

715 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9620 12:55

>>714 What do you reckon is in the perp's browser history?

>>716 Keep that up and you'll find out exactly how it works.

716 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9622 03:36

>>715 How does banning work on this site?

>>717 If you're suicidal, then go for it.

717 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9622 17:07

>>716 Shall I remove my tinfoil hat? I don't think the aliens are around anymore.

>>718 Because it increases your oxygen intake.

718 This post sucked.

719 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9622 19:57

>>718 How do you deal with online censorship?

>>720 It may be difficult, but it will be worth it in the end.

720 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9622 20:57

>>719 Will I ever find true love?

>>721 $17.65

721 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9623 01:02

>>720 If you could ascribe a monetary value to your own life, what'd it be?

>>722 A pair of trousers and a wallet.

722 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9623 21:11

>>721 How did you identify that guy on the evening news who drowned in a lake?

>>723 The most creative way anybody has used to kill a spider.

723 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9623 23:14

>>722 What'll I get if I combine Tin Foil, gunpowder, tree sap, and a spiderweb?

>>724 Ask your mom.

724 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9623 23:54

>>723 Dad, can I go to the party?

>>725 A new bomb formula.

725 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9624 00:23

>>724 What's something I can use liquid Oxygen for?

>>726 It has already begun...

726 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9624 01:59

>>725 When will people see that vaping nicotine is deadly?

>>727 The horse that Kim Jong Un was riding.

727 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9624 02:07

>>726 What's for dinner?

>>728 It's because you touch yourself at night.

728 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9624 09:08

>>727 Why do I feel nervous when talking to strangers?

>>729 Look at the time.

729 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9625 00:46

>>728 When will WWIII begin?

>>730 You need to solve the Captcha first.

730 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9625 12:08

>>729 Why can't I hack the FBI?

>>731 Put your scuba and dive in.

731 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9627 04:28

>>730 How can I find out what's at the core of a volcano?

>>732 Use both hands.

732 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9627 08:51

>>731 How do I stop cutting my fingers on the blender?

>>733 Kick it again.

733 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9627 17:01

>>732 My hamster has stopped working, what do I do?

>>734 Dance on top of it.

734 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9628 05:17

>>733 How do I hide a dead body?

>>735 You could certainly come up with a better name than that.

735 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9628 18:04

>>734 I chose the name "My Rock Band" for my rock band, why don't you approve?

>>736 A Mai Shiranui oppai mousepad.

736 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9628 22:42

>>735 I've won 4000 tickets playing skee-ball. What can I get?

>>737 Eggs.

737 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9629 01:45

>>736 What is a food you hate?

>>738 Blame El Salvador.

738 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9635 00:21

>>737 Why can't Latin America have nice things?

>739 you have two choices, and neither of them look good.

739 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9635 07:03

>>738 how do i seduce my cat?

>>740 horse cock

740 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9635 14:25

>>739 What's the most exotic delicacy you've ever had?

>>741 Point at it and laugh.

741 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9636 14:53

>>740 How do I stop Australia fires?

>>742 Deodorant spray would be a good choice.

742 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9636 15:47

>>741 How do I start Australia fires?

>>743 It should stop moving out of shock, then you can hopefully grab it and lick it before it recovers.

743 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9636 16:09

>>742 Is showing it my cock a viable strategy for catching rainbow-hued toads?

>>744 By riding the snake, man.

744 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9636 17:22

>>743 How did you get this deep in the caves?

>>735 Try jumping.

745 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9637 07:11

>>744 How I alter the Earth's rotation?

>>746 Try asking again.

746 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9637 11:30

>>745 Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

>>747 Throw it in the nearby lake.

747 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9637 11:40

>>746 My kid just scribbled all over the wall, what do I do?

>>748 Scrambled or fried.

748 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9637 11:57

>>747
How would you describe your current mental state?

>>749
No! Never. Well, maybe a little bit, back when I was in my teens, but that doesn't count, right?

749 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9637 20:58

>>748 Gay sex?

>>750 Lemme check my magic eight ball. Well wouldn't you know it it says "Fuck off".

750 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9638 01:38

literally every single drug makes me horny, like an ara ara onee-san with a face blush who gets drunk and wants to hug everyone

751 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9638 05:01

>>749 What should we say to >>750?

>>752 Obtain intercourse.

752 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9640 05:27

>>751 What is my purpose in life?

>>753 Go see a doctor.

753 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9640 07:54

>>752 I'm Alan Moore, it's the year 1986, and I need something witty and sardonic for my self-insert to quip in my next comic book. How do I find inspiration?

>>754 Everything is preordained. Even my responses.

754 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9650 05:14

>>753 How deterministic are you?

>>755 Poison doesn't work. I'd suggest a flamethrower instead.

755 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9650 05:16

>>753 How deterministic are you?

>>755 Poison doesn't work. I'd suggest a flamethrower instead.

756 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9650 12:46

>>755 Oh God, the determinism has trapped me in an endless time loop. Is the only way to get out to kill one of the countless instances of my self?

>>757
Try turning it inside out.

757 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9653 12:24

>>756 There's something inside my nose. Help!

>>758 Flee to Mexico and grow a moustache.

758 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9653 19:33

>>757 How can I go into hiding with my vast site donations?
>>759 Slide it across the ice rink

759 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9653 20:34

>>758 How can I turn my dick into a popsicle?

>>760 Croatian marmoset disorder.

760 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9654 02:59

>>759 What does the CMD in my computer stand for?

>761 Eat it, vomit, then eat it again.

761 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9654 20:16

>>760 How do I get the best out of the food I eat?

>>762 It is up to you, but I personally wouldn't.

762 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9655 05:20

>>761 Should I be asking you this?

>>763 Pack it in rice for 24 hours.

763 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9655 15:10

>>762 futanari bit my cock, and it hurts. what should I do?
>>764 eat it

764 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9655 23:03

>>763 Blue's got the muffin?

>>765 EAT IT!

765 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9656 01:52

>>764 I just threw up on my father-in-law's priceless Persian rug. How should I hide the evidence?

>>766 Run him over.

766 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9656 02:47

>>765 I just threw up on my father in law. How should I apologize?

>>767 Hold it sideways.

767 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9656 06:15

>>766 Explain sidetalking again? I don't understand how you can possibly use this N-Gage™ as a phone.

>>768 Stairs.

768 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9657 05:45

>>767 How do I get my baby to sleep?

>>769 Try a Jaguar.

769 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9658 09:43

>>768 How do I get my baby to sleep?

>>770 8pm tomorrow, or she bites it, pal.

770 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9667 02:29

>>769 When do I have to finish eating my sandwich?

>>771 Break into the headquarters and steal the documents.

771 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9668 07:53

>>770 What's the objective on 2fort?

>>772 Ninjas on wheels.

772 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9669 05:02

>>771 How do I deliver my package to eBay?

>>773 It'll be available on February 30th.

773 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9670 16:23

>>772 The video game I want got delayed again. When will the video game company tell another lie about when the game goes on sale?

774 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9670 16:25

>>775 The computing power of the latest Samsung cell phone combined with the durability of the Nokia 3310.

775 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9674 21:11

>>774 I can't get Mega Man X3 to run on my PC. What specs does it require to operate?

>>776 Drink a glass of lava.

776 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9675 14:40

>>775 How do I satisfy my unquenchable thirst, now that all water flashes into steam instantly since I was isekai'd into a flaming hellbeast?

>>777 Use a reinforced cup.

777 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9675 19:02

>>776 The lava shatter my cup. What do I do?

>>778 The birds love it.

778 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9677 02:49

>>777 Why do you always toss Cherry Bombs into the nearby trees?

>>779 Caramelldansen

779 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9679 00:28

>>778 I like dancing and I want to make a meme. What should I do?
>>780 making social Darwinism the law.

780 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9708 20:47

>>779 How can I help the handicapped?

>>781 Take off your clothes and scream.

781 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9708 21:47

>>780 just killed my cat, what should I do?

>>782 try to eat your dick nipples

782 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9713 13:15

>>781 I'm lacking protein, what dietary changes am I to make?

>>783 Put it in your tea.

783 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9714 12:30

>>782 What can I do with this desiccated scrotum?

>>784 The Lord says not to but he ain't your boss.

784 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9714 12:48

>>783 Shall I put my office on fire?

>>785 The dictionary says otherwise but your definition is better.

785 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9716 15:58

>>784 Should I be calling insane people "normalfags"?

>>786 Only with your parents' approval.

786 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9734 14:44

>>785 Should I use the Ouija board, candles, and spell book in the game room?

>>787 Inupara

787 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9736 16:02

>>786 Nekopara made a fortune. How can we make a fortune on a sequel?

>788 Xi Jinping getting the Coronavirus.

788 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9736 18:38

>>787 What's a plot that has never appeared in a yuri before?

>>789 Because 7 8 9

789 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9737 04:24

>>788 Why did 6 fall into a dark pit of drugs and depression?

>>790 A grammar book and two bowls of rice.

790 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9737 09:42

>>789 What's the reward for speedrunning grade school?

>>791 A big mean old poopy butt!

791 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9737 15:16

>>790 How would you describe someone who lives in a nursing home, is incontinent, and has PTSD?

>>792 The actual condition Kim Jong Un is in.

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