>>743
I spent most of my childhood and teens seriously depressed and isolated, and spent quite a lot of time fantasising about suicide. It was more of a form of escapism or comfort (if things get too much, there's always an easy way out) rather than an actual desire, though. I never made concrete plans or any actual attempts.

These days my life is a lot better, and I have a better perspective on these things. I'm not even against suicide in the abstract; I'd take a utilitarian point of view and say that if the total suffering of the system is decreased by your suicide (i.e. your current and anticipated suffering from continuing to live is greater than the anticipated suffering caused by your suicide) then it's fine by me. Life is not something sacred that has to be maintained at all costs. Just bear in mind that in practice, simply by virtue of the fact that most people have a family, it's highly likely that your suicide will cause more suffering than it solved.

On the other hand, the idle brooding over suicide from my childhood (and, I suspect, >>740) is wholly counterproductive and should definitely be avoided. Successful suicide requires an extremely strong desire to die. The very fact that you, right now, are sitting here reading this rather than already hanging from a noose is proof enough that you will never actually succeed at suicide. Just give up on the idea and focus on trying to improve your life instead. Shikata ga nai.