(He's a tough boy. You can treat him as one of your items.)
I have a great story from a reliable source. She, my friend, worked on the removal of a Barbie doll from a guy's ass. It was all inside, except for its feet, and the two little pink shoes. It was a very sad story, he, on he's late 40', just slipped and fell on it
SPOILERS
In Avengers: Endgame, a new infinity stone is revealed. It is black and is the most powerful of the stones because it can say the n-word.
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having a 3 hour long movie like #AvengersEndgame is an affront to omorashi sufferers like myself, who have to deal with holding piss in through the entirety of the thing and subsequently getting extremely turned on
Dopest dope I've ever smoked
DAMN. I have NEVER seen big chunky cheesy meaty gouda gook girls like this. If she isnt big, creamy, and cheesy like this, I don't want her. Her sweaty curry lumps marinading in her oils just turns me rock hard man. Preserve my race? Ew. White women? What are you, gay? I need my big chunky easycheesy thicc gooky gouda mozzarella mommy. 14?? 88?? Gross. Nasty. Its gotta be easy. Its gotta be cheesy. You're doing it wrong if you're not doing it thicc.
If the sour aroma of a nice juicy nippon nommy creamy cheesy mozarella mommy's fupa doesn't turn you on, you are fucked in the head my friend. How could you look at those delicious gookey creamy thighs and not pop a johnson? Those gooky gooey creamy chunky gouda cheesy tofu mommy thighs. FUCK. FUCK. I'm salivating. If you dont like thicc, you're fucking low test. If you dont fuck a nice ooey gooey greazy easy cheesy chinky mozzarella nippon mommy, you're larping little beta cuck with no gains.
Imagine Eggman sucking up his limbs and bouncing on the big letters to unlock the door every time.
How much do people share in a mind meld? I.e. Did Picard remember/experience Sarek plowing Spock's mom?
From Thor I draw strength, from Odin I gain wisdom, and from Freyja I get big tiddy
HTTP status ranges in a nutshell:
1xx: hold on
2xx: here you go
3xx: go away
4xx: you fucked up
5xx: I fucked up
Goblin slayer is about a mahou shoujo priestess memeing on some retard wearing trash cans tbh
military coup in venezuela AND the sonic movie trailer drops hmmmm
as a new zealander i could never work out if the sheep noises at the start were supposed to be scary or arousing. Thanks for a confusing time at highschool.
Rest in peels little dude
Cuddle in feels little bro
Which part of hippiedom do you hate? In many ways, I'd be considered a hippy. In others, not so much. For example, I care deeply (almost entirely) about the environment (although I don't think car emissions are the problem), I am critical of the materialst society I was born into, and am willing to work with other races to achieve my goals. On the other hand, I refuse to take drugs, I'm not a "peace and love" XD leftists (in fact many of my leanings after anarchy are monarchist in flavor), and I don't believe in forcing people to accept me like they try with their constant non-violent political activism. I believe only in direct and meaningful action
It's kind of lowkey accepted that the comic is cursed.
Put some garlic in yo milk for maximum flavour.
>a player is sulking in a dark corner of the room alone
>he took all the snacks with him
あの頃ニートでお先真っ暗なはずだけど必死にネトゲ、ニコニコ、2chと本当に毎日楽しかった。 気付けばもうすぐ40歳。何とか生きてますみんな元気にやってるか？
I like the part where the cats get connected in a chain with the lines. Makes me feel like the cats like each other, maybe. Haha I hope they're girls.
You know who also loved giving his less-than-enthusiastic reactions to video game franchise movies? Hitler.
absolutely this. do not underestimate the sheer autism that one dude can have to make an ungodly amount of threads every day about a certain person or thing. it's astounding that people believe there is a cohesive opinion on that board when its just the same people making threads
Ancient Aliens is more credible than CNN and I don't think we should insult serious people who hold sincere beliefs by comparing them to hack water carrying frauds at CNN.
So, I am apologizing to Ancient Aliens, and I'm deadly serious.
putting hundred of gags on hundred of zombies so they can gangrape someone without biting them
seriously just how far you will go for you hentai doujishi plot ?
Oh I'm just doing what I've been called to do. It's not easy but it's worth it.
http://www.furaffinity.net/user/anthro01/
Ifucking mean it this woman is nothing better or has any other function besides taking care of men and burying their children she doesn't belong even fucking one step outside so no wonder man some guys got all the luck even if we are the ones to deserve the unbridled fuck of every pleasure icon I personally could until my dick fell off or I died
Why would I need to reconsider my "standing in my life" if a piece of art had an impact on it?
When I die, I want to be cremated and put in my wifes chilli so I can tear that ass up one more time
I also grabbed somebody's exposed guts and did the only thing you can do with them currently, which is pinch them.
they all have great legs 'cause batting and throwing is pure hip/back/leg strength and the arms are ancillary just like in olympic weightlifting, but the long pants really show off your butt too
i mean it's an actual fun sport to watch from a technical standpoint too but yeah
Hello sir, we're here to confiscate your Copy of Windows, if you won't activate Windows.
If you wont comply we will call high court uninstallers, and uninstall your windows.
Asphodel, the Earl of Omonporch has been in the game for four years and has had xe/xem pronouns the entire time. Xe is a part of the main questline, and must be encountered by anyone who progresses past the midgame.
So I have to assume the complainers are all casuals
Oh boy, and there I was going, "Wow, this amazingly presented coffee lets China off the hook for the genocide of the Urgher muslims." Thank goodness this brave soul came and snapped me out of my pitiful trance.
WOMEN THEN: Mysterious, bearers of strange mystique and virtue, informally holding power, ruling through whispers, controlled, metered sexuality
WOMEN NOW: touch my butt and buy me pizza graveyard pussy braphog tools of capital. overarching concern is cummies and child killing
Vaccinations protect the human population, so I would argue antivaxxers are really doing the most to combat climate change.
When the dystopian future came, I was expecting the oppressive monolithic megacorps to be the likes of Ares Macrotechnology and Renraku Computer Systems.
I was not expecting it to be the House of Mouse.
Gosh you are so cute I wanna bite you
bill nye: the worlds on fucking fire, we need to do something
the media: this is a big problem
bill nye: finally, thank y-
the media: bill nye said the fuck word
Hey buddy, it's Andrew. I could watch this 10 times in a row. Well done!
me: my history class is a struggle
me inside:all history is class struggle
I may not be a Butterfinger expert, but I am a fatboy who eats a lot of chocolate. Often Snickers or Caramello, though lately M&Ms has been suckering me in with their buy-one-get-one campaign on their share sizes with all the new flavors. And everybody knows that distinctive Butterfinger taste, right? Those flakes breaking off and crumbling all over you, turning your T-shirt into a Bill Dauterive fashion statement, with their razor-sharp edges getting stuck in your gums to deliver crispety, crunchety, diabetesy goodness straight into your bloodstream. Well, apparently Ferrero SpA has bought the brand from Nestlé, and they fucking ruined it. It tastes like someone ate nothing but off-brand peanut butter for a week, squeezed out a turd, folded and forged it into layers like a samurai sword, dried it out on the sidewalk of a ghetto, and then spray painted chocolate-colored communism all over it. Screw you, Fuckerrero SpA. I didn't speak up when they came for my original Cadbury Eggs. I didn't speak up when Hershey bars became wax bricks. But now I'm laying my middle finger on your Butterfinger, you chocolate cheapening chuds.
Update; I set all my vids to private, got into sissy hypnos, became a vegan and worked in a slaughterhouse, got a sugar daddy 3 times my age, started going to weird ass fetish parties, went to rehab, became a hermit for 6 months while studying tantra and the occult. I'm now a transexual prostitute.
Stay away from lolicore.
Sometimes I wonder about the ai in this game
Was poking around some asteroids when a shield less eagle flies in and starts hollaring about handing over my osmium, of all things, takes a dive right at me, eats a face full of burst lasers, then skids across the top of my krait to explode behind me.
Great job!
It's less subtle when he's doing the pirate voice but, goddamn, Christopher Bowes is Scottish.
I can only imagine the genius social commentary that awaits inside this cute thing’s little pooper.
It's not? I got plenty of friends with colored nicknames.
Federation Force was not a Metroid game, it’s the malformed degenerate sibling that, slithering and gibbering, managed escape the forgotten attic where it had been left because the frogs and cats it was fed on were all gone.
That pitiful, mewling creature lurched out of the darkness where it had spent its misbegotten life into the undeserved daylight. Desperate to avoid the cleansing brilliance of the daylight, it flopped about looking for something to save it.
By simple happenstance, it found the body of Metroid around the back of the cowshed where it had been so cruelly misused by Team Ninja.
Oozing and squirming, it forced its way into the corpse and starting excreting digestive fluids. It then absorbed the resulting sludge into its of form until only the skin was left.
It then attempted to fill out, to imitate, to replace the body, the muscle, the bone. But it can’t, in its own way it thinks it’s human. Sadly, it can only manage a parody.
Lurching and twitching, the barely animated body attempted to pass as anything other than miserable pile twisted bone, cancerous tissue and bile that it was, and head into town.
Where it was mercifully burnt as a witch.
I'm trying to find a place to watch/download any of the Cream Lemon series... Preferably Escalation, but anything's fine. All i've been able to find are torrent sites, so... Yeah. Anyway, please don't answer if you don't know what the hell you're talking about. This is gonna take an anime expert.
Life is so fucking good, 10/10 would live again.
So the story, from what I understand, basically ended up as:
Is George Rape Rape Martin some kind of hidden shitlord?
At my university there is a popular trend among older students to make their own schnapps. It’s always people taking it one step too far just to spice things up and get attention for making a unique new flavour. One example was a group of people putting an actual entire reindeer-scrotum in a jar of hard liquour to let the liquour soak up the ”aromas” from the scrotum. The scrotum never got rotten or bad as it was covered in 50% alcohol, and everytime someone drank from this jar they would refill with more alcohol to keep the scrotum intact. (And yes, there were quite a few drinkers of this beverage).
Here’s where the problem dawned. No one refilled it with liquour for the entire summer and pretty much forgot about it. A few months later as we’re cleaning out the storage rooms for the autumn we enter the room with the scrotum-schnapps. We instantly noticed something was off and I got extremely queasy as soon as the scent hit my nose. We eventually see the jar with a half perfectly intact and half extremely-rotten deer penis inside, without a cap on the top...
I can’t compare the scent to anything in particular, but it was an extremely funky, salty, and heavy smell that has stuck with me forever.
Gamer: I don't like this game.
Also Gamer: I'm going to keep playing this game.
Portland - police units attempting to locate a suspicious subject who’s reported to be wandering through yards of random houses - suspect described as a white male wearing a Darth Vader mask and a bikini.
Hope you like the nightcore upload and be sure to Subscribe to stay up to date with my latest daily Nightcore uploads!
Patrolling the pop music stations almost makes you wish for Johnny Guitar.
vc: nipition
is that sonic or pikachu
Alan grips half a dozen dice, knuckles white.
"What did you say about my mother?"
Chris eyes him over a handful of cards and responds with icy calm.
"Move into my hex and I'll repeat it."
They lock eyes. Tense seconds pass. Alan breaks the trance with a glance to the side. Chris follows his gaze.
Gathering dust next to the board, The Abridged Player vs. Player Combat Quick Guide Volume III (of VIII) awaits them impassively.
Alan glares at the tome for a brief moment before releasing a defeated sigh.
"I've only got another four or five hours to play tonight." Sheepishly he slides his mage away.
Almost imperceptibly, Chris relaxes. His hand is terrible, his hit points low, and the dice haven't been on his side tonight - but his bluff holds.
The APvPCQG:V1-8 has never been opened, and that won't change tonight.
yeah but, imagine how many more gooks and chinks there'd be today if the japs didn't kill so many of them. if obongo can get one just for being black then emperor hirohito should've gotten a nobel peace prize for services to humanity.
>>210
I was going to point out that Imperial Japan didn't kill a significant number of gooks but I forgot the word could refer to Koreans as well as Vietnamese.
hey does anyone in this thread smoke weed
I'm just saying: weed, videogames and masturbation has never cheated on me
google just autocorrected my name to "minecraft" never in my life have i felt so disrespected
MJ got away with molesting many young boys in his secret Neverland Ranch massage parlor. Due to his striking resemblance to a geisha the charges brought against him never stuck, as it was to difficult to pick him out of a lineup of pale face Japanese women.
National Socialism is when you wanna bang some boipussi
Strasserism is when you wanna BE the boipussi
In all fairness to Lovecraft, he placed "beyond space and time" rather squarely in eastern Appalachia.
It was more recent than that, 1995, man. The death cult that did it is still in business. Hence the reason why the vigilance with regards to public trash cans in Japan cannot be relaxed for even a single moment.
The real reason is simply because there are not enough old fellows to stand guard beside each and every bin anymore. They have the bins up near the ticket gates, usually, because the staff can keep an eye on those more easily. Down on the platforms, they are harder to monitor, because the guard has to walk back and forth along the platform, ensuring that no phone zombies accidentally kill themselves; and in that single moment when his attention is averted, a Japanese death cultist could put a dangerous item into one of those bins.
On open air platforms, the practice is a little more relaxed. My home station, for example, has as many as three (3) bins on the platform. These are considered safer, because nerve agents would be made less effective by the fag smoke, and dissipated by the divine winds. Explosive blasts are also less effective in open spaces, because the compression wave is able to expand, and does not reflect from the tunnel walls, pulverising internal organs, and shearing limbs from torsos, so easily.
2019 is the year of indulgently abstract critiques of late capitalism's erosion of human society and relationships, and I cannot wait to write the essay of a lifetime contrasting Ikuhara's kappa butt vore approach with Kojima's oily mpreg approach
Very carefully.
We must not startle the ghouls that live on imgur, soulless beasts who poorly mime the behavior of actual humans in the comment tabs, pretending that they have some deranged and base form of community, as if living in ignorance that imgur is an imagehost and not an actual discussion board.
Found this in my 14 yr old sons YouTube search history, thought I'd get a sense of what he listens to, we don't talk much these days, I thought maybe if I like this we could bond over the music.
I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in my son.
Zachary if you're reading this, dad loves you, but he would very much like you to stop doing drugs.
Not joking. Deadly serious. At the airport.
Just saw an Amish girl and was like "dang, she's hot."
Then I realized, she's not really that hot. She's just in a dress, has no tattoos, is simply kept and that American women are so ugly I'M STARTING TO THINK AMISH IS HOT!!! #fuck
I have 300 IQ and almost did a sociology degree, ask me if you have more questions about this :p
Oh god, I just realised that Yuyuko is not just a ghost, but 1000 years old. How many times has she taken her shoes off in that period? Maybe once? In which case there could be 1000 years of her just locked up and ready to be released. I bet they smell so ripe, mmmmmmmm
It feels crazy that the current year was four years ago
>>226,227
You're both crazy. It won't be the current year for another two decades.
Well first of all, I wouldn't be texting a girl. Nor any person for that sake.
Secondly, she wouldn't ask anything as, if you read the first line, I wouldn't be texting her.
Thirdly, I'd never send a picture of my dick, nor would I ever even take a picture of it. I would never even take a picture with my face on it.
And no I would not get anything back because I do not talk, or "text" with people.
And finally I would not do anything because there hasn't been anything which would require me to take action...
Minecraft Telltale gone MIA.
One of the greatest stories of our generation. Lost. Scattered to the wind. This is worse than if Tolkien, Lovecraft or that guy who wrote the @dominos menu had their works burned at the stake (or pizza oven). A sad day indeed.
I sent her a drawing of my dick through pictochat.
Now she's my wife, thank you myamoto.
This is a different kind of turtle. He doesn't eat lettuce, he feeds on the tears of Mexican kids who've lost their parents, and the tears of Americans who are mourning the continuous crippling of our country. Put a cup of those nearby and you'll eventually have to clean up turtle jizz.
you and I are sharing bonertime right now
we're bone brothers for life starting now
vc jort
Was this @ the FunkFest in August of '78 @ Soldier Field? I was there with friends and cousins. It was an all-time funk jam started @ about Noon, and ended @ about 11 that night. When The Mothetdhip landed, that was the shizit!! No one had ever seen anythimg like it before or since! Afterwards, the party spread ALL ACROSS THE CHICAGO AREA, INCLUDING THE BURBS!! Went to a party or 2 afterwards- didn't get home till 7 a.m. That's how much funk was laid out-stunk up Chicago all week. The cool thing about it was there was no fighting among the races-everyone was deep into the groove of thr fonk the had been unleashed by the bands that day- especially P-Funk, The Bar-Kays, Cameo... too many to remember and mention. I was going on 18, and I've never been to a concert like that since. 🎼🎶🎵🎸🎺🎷🎹🎤🎉🎊💃👣
The picture of an obese man on his knees as if in prayer in front of a fridge just eating raw hot dogs by the pack is something I never thought I would be forced to face.
Dear 30-something lady with license plate M4M4BEAR: I am sorry MAMABEAR was taken but you have made a terrible mistake.
Just wanna sluuuuuurp dat juice
Girls say they want a guy who is funny and spontaneous but when I tap on the window at night dressed as a clown it's all panic and screaming...... (PS Delete as fails GNG) .... –Fuckles The Clown 20:43, 27 September 2017 (UTC)
One is a narcissist beholden to corporate benefactors who used dirty tactics to silence dissent. The other is Benito Mussolini.
Sex is great, but have you ever 100% Crit Buster Brave Chain before?
All characters depicted are 18 or older, even if otherwise specified.
Can't believe we're having this conversation about Tifa's breast size. The way the breasts wobble in that one original AMV cutscene is intended to juxtapose the twin commodities of both violence and sex against the backdrop of societal collapse. Nobody's gonna get that if they're not at least G cup sized
His staff is watching him like a hawk. They've taken away his groping & sniffing opportunities so he's lost his will to gaffe.
Imagine getting a compliment in real life.
It’s like lumping pharmacists & drug deals together and calling an illegal immigrant a ‘undocumented immigrant’ is like calling a drug dealer ‘an unlicensed pharmacist’
Every girl has BPD and every boy has autism.
VC: bi
we can only go for a diaper wearing sonic if rich kuta's playing him, the diaperfur community won't accept anything else. it'd be a huge pr disaster
One of the two authors describes himself as having a “passion for bacon.” We live in a world full of art, drama, music, prose, poetry, and animal videos, and your passion is bacon? Fucking bacon, the pork food? I want you to return all the oxygen you have ever breathed to the world, this instant.
Black hole in Japanese is 無限空間重力点 (point of infinite spatial gravity)
jk it's burakku hooru