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>>148
Did you use a PO box as a sender address just in case he has a severe allergy or decides to stalk you?
I'm going to take off your head now.
>>142
That's exactly why I didn't do it. There are a lot of ways to go, but everything can fail, leaving the body or the brain fucked up, but alive.
I was once obsessed with an idea of swallowing a treble hook attached to a tower crane and jumping down, thus, ideally, tearing my guts out and dying a few moments later. But the thought of just hanging there with a hook stuck in my mouth, bleeding, suffering intense pain, and slowly suffocating on my own blood was enough to make me value my life.
>>152
That's pretty horrible, sounds more like some gruesome mafia murder than a suicide method.
Eat all the plants, eat all the plants that you want, accidents happen like it or not.
I considered suicide when I was a young and foolish teenager. Then I found http://lostallhope.com/, and realised it was a very, very bad idea. I also once had to help talk another young and foolish teenager out of suicide, which was not a particularly fun experience.
so there are (at least) two of us who have attempted suicide? fade-to-nothingness-kun and mangled-bones-san?
>>156 does thinking about it count?
This is really the reason I don't own a handgun. It's not because I'm a super anti-gun activist or anything; I have no problem with gun ownership for home protection (assuming it even really works most of the time.) But I think if I owned a gun, I'd be too tempted to put a bullet in my skull after getting into one of my deep ruts, which happens far too often. Pulling a trigger is just too easy, even in contrast to jumping out a window.
Three. I tried to overdose on psychiatric medication, but apparently I didn't take enough. In hindsight, I should have drank some alcohol to go with it. That might have done the trick.
>>157
The most common kind of violence caused by legal gun owners is suicide, not homicide. Real criminals who kill people don't care about gun laws or licenses.
>>156 I was heading for a high bridge when I talked myself out of it and checked into a hospital instead. Half a year's worth of Prozac and cognitive behavior therapy later and I'm feeling good.
>>161
What exactly does cognitive behavioral therapy entail? I've been to multiple therapists but all they do is talk to me one-on-one in a room. I thought CBT was more than just the stereotypical how-does-that-make-you-feel armchair therapists.
I thought >>162 was talking about cock and ball torture after skimming this thread too quickly.
I'd separate her variables, if you know what I mean.
Let's not consider suicide anymore, and imagine and post wonderful things instead.
Such as the blissful eternal respite of death.
>>165
Just today I found out I got more than 90% on a really hard assignment! I'm glad my hard work paid off.
Okay, so you know how wallpaper starts to peel at the corners when it's old? Maybe it's just me, but I always get this strange urge to pick at it and peel it away. Anyway, the point is, it's like that, but instead of wallpaper it's the substance of reality itself.
>>168
Have you seen the movie Barton Fink?
http://www.anyclip.com/movies/barton-fink/peeling-wallpaper/
You should watch the whole movie, it's good
>>161
I'm glad you talked yourself out of it. I was on prozac and now I'm on sertraline and don't feel any different with either of them.
>Basically, CBT is retraining your inner voice to not be such an asshole to you.
But my inner voice has been an asshole my whole life. I think it's too deeply ingrained into my very being at this point.
In that case, direct that inner asshole at everyone else, and it'll be too busy to rag on you.
Khhhhhh! Khhhhhh!
I love chewing gum.
I chew so many packs of gum, it's crazy.
You may call me a "gum guzzler"
Cock and ball torture
>>168
Depends on a glue, but most likely adding a bit of water on the back side should suffice to stick it back. But yeah, peeling wallpaper is probably the best part in house renovation.
>>172
I used to think that too, but give it a try anyway. It works, it just takes work.
cocks
oh how the mighty have fallen
death grips x anime mashups
Surprisingly, the Hoki station is still alive.
http://hokisjstation.no-ip.info:8000/
I don't like sex
>>184
gay
yes, I really filled out a captcha just to call you gay
Shaved my head today, feels great. I used electric clippers over the bathroom sink and when I was done it was full to the top with hair. The clippers even got stuck a few times because my hair is really thick and impossible to take care of which is why I shaved it in the first place.
Thanks for reading my blog.
>>186
Hmmm, tonight I should fall asleep to an ASMR haircut recording.
I want to get a real haircut but I'm too anxious.
Thanks for reading MY blog.
Reading through entire textboard threads really nicely complements listening to lolicore.
My home has been without internet access for 72 hours now. If it weren't for this library, I'd've probably lost my mind by now.
I've become the system.
Once, the system was just a part of me.
It was the part that lurked inside; the burning desire to find out what the system is. The system sought to recreate itself.
But now I understand.
I've looked inside my system and I've seen it.
It's everything.
It's cups, it's picture frames, it's diaries, it's monetary value, it's iPhones and pens and curtains and peaches and gates and skyscrapers and shopfloors.
It's all inside me and I can unleash it when I feel like it.
When I want you all gone, I'll simply activate my world destruction trigger.
It's located on the side of my head.
I'll need some kind of blunt force to activate it, though.
Will you activate my system for me?
It's laying dormant, choking on the mist inside me.
I have no bones and no organs, just mist and the system.
These words aren't even real.
The system is real; the fog is real; the desire is real.
But you're not real.
How does it feel to be part of my system?
Does it feel good?
I hate you.
You know what? I like animals and everything, but if someone's pet dog is retarded enough to eat something that will kill it, despite the owner's efforts to prevent it, maybe just let the dog die.
>>195
sounds like the logic of a person who leaves poisoned dog treats scattered around in the park
>>196 not at all. I just think it's a bit of a waste to spend $20,000 on operations for an animal that adamantly refuses to not try to kill itself by breaking into the cupboard and eating a mess of chocolate.
>>197
You could, by the same argument, say that we shouldn't pay for lung cancer treatments for smokers.
>>198
Only if you place the same value on a family pet as on a human member of your family.
>>199
Exactly, it's a value judgement. Whether or not a problem is someone's own fault or not is largely irrelevant to whether or not you should help them.
As an aside, my family dog once ate most of a toblerone and she was absolutely fine.
>>197
If a dog eats a shitton of chocolate, what does the dog need to get well? Stomach pumping? Why does that cost 20K?
>>202
I think it's actually cacao that is harmful to dogs, but there's not as much of it in milk chocolate as there is in say baker's chocolate.
I LOVE CATS AND THINGS THAT ARE RELATED TO CATS
I wish the /language/ board were more active.
Maybe I should just stick to what I know.
I actually like memorising kanji.
>>212
I like memorizing heavily inflected verb forms throughout various classical languages. By various, I mean three.
If only radio [...]
Beauty is artifice.
I haven't even showered yet today and all I've done is masturbate a lot. I wish I had the willpower to do things I actually want to do.
There is no motivation today either.
>>216
You should get a hobby, any hobby. Other than masturbation, I mean.
It's 2:30 in the morning and I haven't gone to sleep yet. I need to get up really early tomorrow... or should I say today.
I never cease to be amazed by this song's ability to give me a mental breakdown on demand.
Poole's closed!
>>222
Despite all the emails I sent him over the years calling him a faggot and telling him to kill himself, it makes me feel a bit sad to hear that he's retiring. Like it's the end of an era, or something.
I think we've all given him a little too much shit, but you gotta admit he's done pretty well for a single person on a site with almost 2 billion posts.
Suffice (imperative)
ineffective flu vaccines
the end is near
Will any tech giants ever experience huge data loss? Like maybe it'll turn out that there's a defect in the hard drives they use, or perhaps a meteor will strike a data center. I know companies do backups but it's possible (yet unlikely) that their primary and backup storage could be impacted at the same exact time.
Imagine if large parts of Youtube, for example, just disappeared.
Is it wrong that I'm looking forward to the Charlotte vs Mami edits of the soon-to-be-released beheading video of those two Japanese guys that ISIS captured?
After literally several years, on and off, of trying to master lucid dreaming, I now have rather good dream recall. However, not only do I no longer keep a dream diary, but I generally don't even make an effort to properly remember my dreams any more. This is partly because not all of my dreams are things I want to record or remember (for various reasons) but there's more to it than that. Many of my dreams strike me as really, truly beautiful - not in their entirety, but just bits of them - and somehow this beauty is intrinsically linked to their ephemerality, and how easily they are forgotten.
My memory is fairly good for facts and figures, but astoundingly poor for personal details - even my own ones. My memories of my childhood are already very hazy, with many events that I can't quite place or have outright forgotten. I even have confabulated memories: I have a very vivid memory, for instance, of being in a hot air balloon, but both my parents insist it can't possibly have ever happened. Soon enough my memories of early adulthood will go the same way, and everything I care so very deeply about now will slowly desaturate and evaporate away.
Perhaps that's why I like forgetting my dreams, because it reminds me of how my waking life will go. Everything in my dreams, the good and the bad, will vanish given time - a few hours at most. When I am lying on my deathbed, I will look back on my life and see it in exactly the same way. Somehow, it makes it all the more precious and beautiful; it's what separates personal experience from dispassionate facts and theories.
That brief moment each morning, still wrapped in bedclothes, staring at the ceiling, recalling the false events of the last night, might just be the most momentous part of my day.
we need another paradigm shift
>>218
I do have hobbies, just not the willpower to engage in them consistently for long periods of time and I'm easily distracted.
Those don't even look like maltesers.
I like when you guys think about things.
I thought geting drunk wouldh elp me fall asleep but it just made me want to listen to zz top
And then he went to bed.
I've been feeling very lonely lately, I didn't really notice it for a while. I don't talk to lots of people and feel kind of like an outsider even in some of the other internet communities I try to join.
Matrix three is a 3 by 3
Whatever gets you through the day, whatever lets you sleep at night.
I hate Sundays.
I'm sad because I was reminded of my own inadequacies.
The malaise of the thousands of lives you'll never live.
too cold
I shan't mention it.
Immediately scrolling to the bottom of the list to find DQN is going to be a hard habit to break.
I really don't understand the hubub about snow coming to the NE US. It's just a normal amount of snow but people are calling it a blizzard.