I'm usualy just a lurker around the board, but today i have a story... recently i been posting about long distance relationship because I really like this girl that lives in japan. but i live in australia so its really hard if i want to confess to her.. well this is how it all started...
Around 2005 April, i was picked on by some people at school because of my hobby, which is movie making. I'm really like a movie otaku, i love watching movies thats why my dream is to become a film director. most of the girls i knew, i told them about my hobby and they would all ne like "isn't that like really immature??" and later on wont ever talk to me.. it was around November when i was on a japanese pen pal website where i met the japanese girl, her name was Aya. we started emailing each other talking about school and life style ect. then i asked her if she used skype and she said she uses it so we added each other. we started talking in skype, (to those who doesn't know its like msn but you use microphone to talk). for the first time, i told her i'm into film making... she unlike the other girls was actualy intrested in it.. she asked me when can i show her my movie.
we talked almost everyday, mostly for 2 hours and we can always talk about anything like movies, anime, school, music ect.. then one night... we talked for 6 hours! i only had 2 hour sleep because i had to wake up for tennis lessons >"< we got more close after that. for christmas i bought her a bracelet and air mailed it to her, she liked it alot. one day i got her email but was really surprised... usualy at the end of the email she would just write "from Aya" but this time she wrote "Love from Aya". i had this feeling when i saw it. after that, i didn't hear from her for 2 weeks and then one night i got her email asking when can i talk to her... but after that... I've waited for a month and stil counting on... I emailed her before saying i have something to tell her because i planned to confess to her next time we talk.. but now i dont think i can do it because i reckon its highly likely i may get rejected since we are so far away ＿|￣|○" the feeling with this girl is different from all the other girls i liked. should i confess or not??
benson forget the love letter and go for the goal. next time you meet her give her a kiss and then see what happens.
Print out and memorise:
You: Hey Manda.
Manda: Oh hey, Benson.
You: Pause Uh can we talk? I have something to tell you. Take her hand and lead her to a bench
Manda: Umm, ok..sure. Let go of her hand
You: Dramatic pause. I just wanted to tell you how much you mean to me. You've always been there for me, and I really feel lucky to have met you. My friend told me that you just thought of me as a friend, and I respect that, but lately I've started to like you alot. Look into her eyes You make me feel happy when I'm around you and I want to be more than friends with you. You're really special to me. I just wanted to let you know.
Manda: Flustered
You: Kiss her hand
Walk into the sunset
Wake up from dream and live in the real world
Live rest of life in a deep, inescapable depression
>>443 i will try that next week we meet, we're going to a beach so it will be better if i can do it during the sun set!
if shes crowded with people, i go up to her and say "hey manda, uh can we talk? i have something to tell you..." right?
god i'm already nervous right now ~~"
i know it is a big undertaking but dont follow >>443 plan. life is unscripted, so you will have to feel your way through the situation. just relax and dont get too worked up over this. you are a resisent guy so if this doesnt work, like always, will walk away wiser, taller and ready for what comes next.
is >>443 plan not good?? hmm i have decided to confess when i see her and we are going to the beach. i was thinking either give her the letter or just say it.
okay, I guess i got a little carried away. but seriously, what is wrong with starting off with "hey manda, uh can we talk? i have something to tell you..."? if you haven't noticed, benson's way of approaching women is rather scripted itself. (no disrespect to benson), but if he's gonna get anywhere with this girl, he sounds like he needs to follow a couple of lines to get his confidence up. yes, confess to her at the beach. i'm excited for you buddy. just make sure the palm cards aren't too big to see. jk.
nothing wrong with that part. it is just the >Print out and memorise:
>>450 lol its not disrespectful, it is true anyway xD well i like ur plan anyway so i mite stick to that on that day.
i'm thinking of doing it before we leave cos thats around sun set time and hopefully no one is around.
my family friend who is a friend of manda said i might have a chance after she saw my messages with her
>>451
that is the MOST IMPORTANT part. she can tell that you're prepared and well organised. something that every girl looks for in a man.
i'm getting nervous every day! the day is getting closer when i confess to manda! god...
Have someone punch your arm repeatedly, so that the pain in your arm will distract you from the pain in your heart. Alternatively it could make you numb, and therefore insensitive to any type of rejection.
Hahaaaa. Only kidding. You can do it BEnsonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
If you fall, i'm here to catch you.
Sincerely yours,
Secret Admirer
Benson, you're taking too long.
okk i have a problem... well i dont know if its a problem...
well on my forums, her friends at school was talking about something she sms me cos she cant go on monday and she sms me saying "hey u should come to our school celebration evening or smthing!" and manda on the forums suddenly said "Benson, do you like me?"
i am so speechless right now, my family friend who is her friend at school asked her what she thinks, apparently she doesn't want anyone to know what she thinks, everyone says i have a chance now and should confess as soon as possible, shes talking a bit shyish today but stil talking normally. what do you think is going on!? btw her school evening is on the 20th of november and my exams are on the 23rd.. godd this is bad or maybe good lol
okk i was just talking to manda and she just told me REALLY REALLY personal stuff about her family... i think i have a chance right now! i might confess to her in 2 weeks time, go to her school and wait at the front gates for her and confess to her when i see her! my god is this really going to work out?! if it does... i will be a VERY happy man!
I don't know why you decided two weeks but, you're the man. Plan your timing well and best of wishes to you!
>i think i have a chance right now!
>i might confess to her in 2 weeks time
you're doing it wrong.
seriously, what is wrong with you benson? you let the best opportunity slip because you plan too fucking much. ALL THE SIGNS ARE RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSE. I THOUGHT YOU FREAKING CONFESSED TO HER AT THE BEACH????? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING IT OFF? DO YOU WANT TO SCREW THIS UP??
freaking hell. everytime i come on 4-ch, your last post is always "omg, i MIGHT confess to her this time!" or "i MIGHT confess to her NEXT CHRISTMAS." seriously dood, i was rooting for you after you dumped lis. i thought you had developed some initiative and realised what girls were like, but now i'm not so sure.
PS. even if you planned for your confession to be the perfect time (being at her ball and all), chances are it will not turn out like you wanted it too. the best time to confess is usually that unplanned fleeting instance. ie: when she said "Benson do you like me?" you should have launched your attack from there. in person, preferably.
>>463 i havn't confessed at the beach cos thats wat was suppose to happen on monday and shes not going on monday. reason why i dont wan to do it on the forums or msn is cos i've done that in the past and its the worst place to confess on the net, the only time i can see her is in 2 weeks or a week. unless i should do it on the phone but that doesn't seem to be a good idea, i will confess to her if she does ask me on msn, i'll prob say "would u rather me telling u in person?" and some how arrange to meet. or just call her if she asks me and tell her on the phone.
If you can't meet her right now, thats unavoidable. Instead, call her and up and tell her, "I have something really important I want to tell you when you get back. How about meeting somewhere?"
Good luck man,
a girlfriendless comrade
aahh thanks thats a good idea!! i'll be doing it next monday!
Does this girl like guns, benson?
steyr aug perhaps?
hmm amanda just told me she likes someone else...so i guess...its another rejection....i think i will disappear for a while
how about you get back on your feet and find some other girl. remember courting is a numbers game.
Such a high school drama. You take too long. Your youth will pass by quickly.
well to be honest i aint that down, just feel really weird thats about it. i guess i'll just move on again XD
like they say, theres plenty of fish out there
Sometimes you have to whack the fish over the head with an oar and drag it into the boat, though. Get what I'm saying?
yueah. if you give up over something as little as this, it just proves that you really didn't LOVE HER LIKE YOU CLAIMED YOU DID. wasn't this the girl who drove you crazy??? the one who you wanted to play piano for??? THE ONE THAT YOU FREAKING WAS GONNA CONFESS TO?? this wasn't a mere crush dude. you don't just "move on again" in this situation. you have to FIGHT FOR HER and maker her realise she WANTS YOU.
hmm its a bit hard from some infomation i got today...
yea i was crazy about her tilll today... apparently a friend of mine told manda about how i am going to confess to her on monday and she doesn't seem to be the type of person that will tell people about it so i find it really weird. my friend at school is suspicouse that she mite like me cos i'm very close to her and recently she just got over a guy she liked before and she suddenly called me today cos she heard i was away on msn and was turning emo or something. she has NEVER called me before so i called back today and she didn't answer but 2 mins later she messaged me twice by accideny saying "omg sorry i was in shower -_-", i talked to her for a while and she thought i was emo and got worried about it so i told her i was ok, then she said she will talk to me tomorow. so i rather find it weird that this girl told manda about monday... i dont think she likes me becasue i know that when she likes someone shes to shy to talk to them, really confused though cos we talk almost everyday.
so wat should i do about manda? i got rejected and i wanna know why my friend told manda about monday's confession.... it just doesn't make sense, and wat happen if this friend likes me?? should i go for the friend or stil go for manda?
Oh, you kids and your "emo."
benson you should know that girl can never keep a secret. loose lips sink ships. next time dont tell a girl any thing important because females cannot be trusted.
thats so true...well manda emailed me today saying how nothing is going to change between us and that she will still be there for me if i need help and care for my well being... god shes such a nice person...
oh btw i forgot to say that the friend is Lyss.....today lyss made me promise i wont disappear and stop being by my self. hmm i must admit i'm not handling very well in this situation atm.... i'm seeing lyss tomorow cos shes giving me a CD. with manda i'm not sure what to do now but maybe remaining close friends like now will be good... i'm pretty sure lyss doesn't like me cos shes getting over this guy atm...but i'm not sure.. god i'm pretty hopeless at this.
CASE DISMISSED.
lol i met lyss today at her school with my two friends and one of her friends. apparently my friend confessed to lyss's friend last week and she accepted it today.. god so lucky
i gave lyss this keychain and she really liked it, its a thank u gift for the last two days cos she helped me a bit with the rejection from manda. me and my friend were saying how out situation really is like a high school drama lol.
i got a email from manda yesterday, she said "nothing is going to change... i'm stil always gonna be there for u whenver u need help and care for ur well being, thats wat friends are for right?", i must admit i was really touched from the email. well its all good to me really, i stay the same with manda and my chances are stil there. i kind of found out why she rejected me..... apparently someone made this stupid story of me going for my family friend in the past and found manda more cuter and smart so rejected my family friend ect... i bet that really embarrased manda so she got annoyed.
btw apparnetly lyss really liked the gift and kept saying thank u and how cute it is. even told my family friend about it (my family friend goes to the same school as lyss and manda lol)
CASE DISMISSED.
AGAIN.
Indeed, this case is over.
write down the details of keychains on your blog, not here. we'd like to see just a tad more important matters than that.
What's next? are you going to tell us how you accidentally took 6 pieces of toilet paper instead of the usual five, because you were distracted thinking of a random girl who you saw in the bus?
then again i could reason to just not read this thread anymore, or rather not to take posts by some '映画男' serious anymore
>well its all good to me really, i stay the same with manda and my chances are stil there.
you're right that you stay the same with manda, but wrong that your chances are still there. you're deep in the friendzone, buddy.
>>485 sorry, i'll stop posting
>>486 prob true, stuck in the friendzone
i'll just quickly conclude that i was on the phone with lyss for 45 minutes and she called me twice today cos she thought i was depressed and she doesn't call guys. well anyway about time to end this thread since not much is happening. but just wanna say a big THANKS to all the previous anonymous whos helped me in the past.
If something SERIOUS happens, scream or something.
Eiga otoko, If something big happends, you know where to find us :D
You don't have to listen to those other guys. Post whatever you like whenever you like.
you really haven't learnt have you. i've heard you say "my family friend told manda..." about 219408kasjfaslkfja30129 times already. she screwed up your chances with lyss AND manda. but hey, what are friends for ^_^
>>491 very true, shes stuffed me up all the time. i guess my mouth is too big.
more like her mouth is too big
stick it in her pooper
>>494 lol how bout just duck tape her mouth next time XD
you should know which alternative she likes
I need an update.
well i saw lyss last week at badmin cos she told me to go and she seem excited knowing i was going. there was this intresting convo we had though last week...
Lyss: why dont u hit on her??! lol and then she'll get over it
Benson: zomg i'll rather jump off the window then hit on her!
Lyss: omgg!! wtf!! nooo!!!! dont jump!! if you jump i'll jump!!
Benson: what! why are you jumping cos of me?!
Lyss: i dunno, just felt like it
my friend said she really cares for me but doesn't really like me. i can only say me and lyss are really close friends but for some reason she doesn't feel like talking to me now cos she knows i'm not EMO. i really like lyss atm and i just want her to be happy even if she doesn't like me, i'll do anything to make her happy. i tried my best to make her like me but i guess i couldn't, some how i'm only seen as a FRIEND to everyone.
>>498
Maybe if you stop typing/talking like an idiot things will work out better for you. Grammar karma?
>Lyss: omgg!! wtf!! nooo!!!! dont jump!! if you jump i'll jump!!
Yeah, she is basically quoting "Titanic."
And if she doesn't like you, then why the fuck bother. You aren't going to benefit from helping her. Be selfish and only do something only if you benefit from it. That is why everyone thinks as you as a friend because you are always nice and no one can hate a nice guy. But girls never love a nice guy.
maybe i should be more aggresive and harsh to her now lol, if being mr nice guy doesn't work, i think i should be the villain now.
How can you do that when you never even bought that Steyr AUG that was suggested to you several times?
because i dont have the money and licence to buy it yet lol
i was surprised to recieve a email from aya who told me her computer has a virus LOL...
SIF u got a virus! anyway i was sort of rejected by lyss cos she told me i'm not her type but i'm a REALLY good friend and a REALLY nice person. so i guess i'll have to fix my body up a bit since i am a little fat ._. time to work out
you do that. take a break from all the girls, shape up and then worry about girls.
today i recieved a shocking email from manda telling me that her best friend commited suicide the other day. i'm the 2nd person she told and she said she told me cos she really trust me. shes blaming her self for the friends death cos the guy called her 3 times but her phone as off. i told her not to blame her self for that and that its not her fault, and that i'm always here for her if she needs someone.
we played maple a bit and i think it made he felt better, hopefully she'll get better cos from the sound of it at the moment shes stil blaming her self. always sad to find out ur friend died.. *sigh
sorry to hear about that. i had a friend commit suicide, it can be difficult to get over it. just let her know you are there for her. it takes time to get over it but eventually she will be fine.
oh it may be dumb to say but for those who are fucked up: dont take advantage of her sorrow for your own personal gain.
now here got another guy with nick "映画男". like the famous "电车男"
>>509
the fuck?
>>509 lol yea another famous story like densha LOL SIF
anyway manda seem to be fine cept that one of her friends is telling people about the situation when she specificly told her not too, i was on the phone with manda 2 days ago for about 1 hour and 20 minutes and we talked alot. i'm away from home atm so she kept on asking me when i'm coming back and also text me saying "tell me when u come back :D" is she trying to ask me out? i kinda get that feeling cos on the phone she asked me twice when i'm coming back. lyss seems to be havin fun in japan atm lol
you guys wont beleive what happened!! ok i was talking to Aya (finally) who told me her computer was down for 4 months and she was too busy with school work and exams. we talked a bit about all the stuff we missed, i told her i missed her and she said she missed me as well. suddenly she said this...
Aya: hmm i like to tell you something
Benson: what is it?
Aya: i really like you
Benson: uh...really? (in japanese)
Aya: really(japanese)
Benson: hmm since when?
Aya: since last year when december
Benson: hmm wow.. to be honest i am surprised
Aya: hmm do you like me?!
Benson: hmm Aya....can you give me a little time? i need to think about it
Aya: ok!
i cant beleive it, Aya confessed to me and shes the first girl to confess to me in my life! the problem is, i alrdy like lyss but then i'm thinking. what if i dont be with lyss and miss this chance with aya?! i'm really confused now, my heart is with lyss but i dont know, this is kinda like my dream come true. what should i do?
well u already know what answer u might get. so dont do that. she lives miles away anyway. living far away is absolutely an obstacle to have romance with her, but it may be the best help when u want to forget about her
Man I just don't care anymore.
GO FOR THE MOST REACAHBLE ONE. Long distance relationships at this teenage years is rather bleh. Keep touch with her in case you have a chance to drop by her place.
I mean good god. If this is how things go in high school then I'm in for a real ride D:
i agree with >>513, this is the best chance to forget about her i mean this girl dumped you there waiting for so many months without saying a real reason and now she wants you back?! dont go that way, you'll just regret it in the future, stick with lyss.
DUMP HER!
Before we can give any actual advice, could you tell us what Aya's favorite pokemon happens to be?
>>517 why does pokemone matters so much in this thread?!
I'm sorry to say, but for a serious relationship, that is, one other then the "I got a girlfriend in japan" bragging rights. Aya is out of the question...sorry =/
okk i had a real think about it and i finaly chose to reject aya, why? heres some reasons....
-she made me wait for so long without a proper answer
-I alrdy have someone i truely like, Lyss
-she hasn't really done anything that will make me like her now
there you go, i can think of more but thats the main reasons. i rather be friends then have long distance and regert later on. but i wont just rejet in her face, i'll explain it to her next time i talk to her.
>>520
dont worry. just reject her. she lives miles away, and havent even seen u before. she wont care as much as what u might think. she will be fine however harsh u reject her.
It seems to be Korean common sense
Jesus Christ is a Korean
Tom Cruise is a Korean
Carl Lewis is a Korean
Michael Jordan is a Korean
Queen Elizabeth is a Korean
American ancestors are Koreans
A Korean forges it
>>522 wtf with all the korean?
It's something that can immediately allow you to get an idea of someone's true nature. A person's favorite pokemon just says a lot about what kind of person he or she is.
Well, that is a good choice. It tells me that you're either sensible or that you're easily influenced by peers.
>>526
this post tells me you're either retarded or not
well i successfully rejected Aya without a problem, she was fine with staying good friends. anyway my parents are thinking of movine me to taiwan from australia, i told lyss the other day and she got upset about it and kept on saying "as long as your happy, then its all good. you better be happy there, if its for your own good, i wont stop you." well its not confirmed whether i'm moving or not but if i am, i'm planning on confessing to lyss, i was thinking of buying her a nice necklace here but i'm not sure if thats a good gift. any suggestions what to buy?!
tell her first and then worry about buying a necklace. save your money
today i went out with a girl i use to like, shes older then me though, it was only the two of us today. oh btw i'm not in australia, i'm in taiwan now for holiday, i only see her once a year when i come back, we normaly spend New years and watch the fireworks. well today when i met her i was rather speechless at the begining since i havn't seen her for so long, we walked around and chatted about what we been doing latley. she took me to see the university there and we walked around, then got tired so we sat down and was waiting for a friend. we talked for about 2 hours about our lives in 2006~ however the friend was busy so she didn't turn up. the girl then says next time they'll come to my house and cook, i said "sure! that'll be nice!" anyway we went to eat at a small shop then went to look at some gift shops and walked around. then we took a bus home, well didn't really do much but it was nice to go out with her, shes coming over to my place next week to cook haha. oh by the way anyone read the actual "Densha Otoko" novel? i just bought it today in the book store, its the whole message board format, intresting...
i tried to ask lyss out on the email since i might be moving back to taiwan to study. but she said "yeah sure we could go out sometime...with Angela(my big mouth family friend) and peoples right?
We'll organize it when we get back, and can I bring along my friend who came
from Hong Kong and is staying with me for the remainder of the summer holidays." from the sound of it, i dont think i'm able to go out with her with only her and me. she also said "keep emailing me...even if you go back to taiwan" i guess i'm stuck in the friend zone...again. i might give up on lyss since i'm moving back, if i am then i will 100% give up and stay good friends with her, if not then maybe i'll give it another try.
recently i've been going out with that girl i use to like, shes 7 years older then me and we known each other for 3 years. today i went out with her and my older brother came along, he was really flirty around her, i kinda got jealous to be honest. during dinner, my brother kept on asking if he didn't have a gf, would she choose him. she said "yes", then my brother asked "what about someone whos 7 years younger then you?" and she replied "well.. they have to be mature since his younger then me". btw recently we're getting close since we are really close friends anyway, she suggested me to go to her school cos i told her i might be moving back and i myself know that she feels save around me. but the problem i stil have is that i stil dont have confidence with girls even though i've gotten much better, my brother kept on patting her head and grabbing her arms when crossing the roads. should i be doing that?! maybe thats why i never got chances but i just feel nervous and afarid that they might think wrong of me. i'm kinda starting to have feelings for her again cos when i see her, alot of memories rush in my head. shes really important to me, she saved me during a really depressing time. whats also bugging me is that i'm afraid if my brother is just playing around with her, cos my brother already has a gf and his acting as if his trying to pick her up. i really dont know what to do cos he could tell i was a little sensative when he was flirting with the girl. i'll be seeing her again in two days, if i move back i'll see her alot. also is it strange for someone to like a person whos 7 years older then you?? some people find it really weird but otherss find it normal, anyway i feel she treats me different this year, in a good way.
Jesus christ dude you are simply shooting blanks now.
You have known her for 3 years, and she is 7 years older than you, while you are 16.
Unless she is into teenagers, then you may be more or less, well, screwed.
Seriously dude, what I suggest you to do is to calm down and stop thinking about girls just for 2 days or so. Because right now you are simply getting boners at random. You need to pick one REASONABLE girl, then focus on her, not some swinging between Aya/Lyss/23yearoldfriendwhoyouhaveknownfor3years/Badmintongirl/whatever.
Honestly, I stopped paying attention a hundred posts ago once I got confused whom are you actually trying to get.
Also, you are moving to Taiwan. Lots of cute girls there (around your age), right?
>>533 yeah, there is alot of cute girls around my age. well i'm obvioursly thinking too much again and i really should take my time to think. this really makes me look like a player
_|￣|○" i think i'll stop posting till i find someone i really want to be with them, so far it was lyss but since i'm moving back i thought i'll give up since she doesn't really like me.
>i'm obvioursly thinking too much again and i really should take my time to think
what?
It simply seemed that you are popping a boner, then dumping whatever the girl you were going for and go for the newfound boner-inducer.
What I want is you to cool down just for a moment, clear your head, and then think what you really need to do.
>>536 i think thats been my problem for my whole life, i never really cool down and think clearly what i really want or need to do, even with my own life. i guess thats what i should have been doing in the first place then jumping around from one to one.
btw i gave up on alot of girls in this thread for either they rejected me(Manda), they disappeared (aya) or they dont like me (lyss). i still like lyss but i never got the chance to do anything with her especially with my annoying big mouth family friend following us everywhere. i'm trying to find a way to go out with lyss alone but i think shes not confortable doing that.
Well, I do have to admit, you have done much more in a few months than I have in... years D:.
Well, dude. I think it's STAGE CLEAR here. You MIGHT try out with Lyss, but don't hold your breath. But when going for Lyss, don't be so stressed out. You sound like stressed out like all the time. Like you have constipated for 9 years or something.
If luck is on your side, then luck will pull some strings and help you out. Believe me, miracles have happened even to the most common of folks.
Good luck.
(Also don't also say BUT DISASTERS ALSO HAPPEN. Well, that's the whole thing with the yin and the yang. Shit happens, then you win the lottery. Etc.)
From my past experience, I suggest that you stay away from friends. I think that probably like me, the girls see you as a nice guy and are just getting friendly with you.
Friends of friends are ok tho. That's about how all of my friends found their girlfriends and boyfriends.
I guess you could call me a believer in the friend-zone.
You're also moving to Taiwan right? Unless you plan on coming back to Australia, perhaps you should concentrate on your studies more for the time being. You wouldn't want to look back in 10 years time, still single, and regret not focussing more on your studies to get a decent job.
If you really want more advice, wait until University/College before you find a girlfriend. Lot's more choices.